LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 31 May 10 - 11:36 AM

Bobert,

   The song is called True Green by Annie Rapid.

:) Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Bobert
Date: 31 May 10 - 09:18 AM

Nice video...

Plus, hang on to that pink wig, Michelle... Maybe you'll make a Getaway one day and it would be perfect if you wanted to ***audition*** (wink, wink) to be a Floozie in BobertsBluesBand...
lol... Actually, you'd be the envy of the Floozies...

Oh, nice music, too...

Who sang that last song???

B~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 31 May 10 - 07:53 AM

Good Morning!

   I thought you might like to see the most recent update of my montage, so here's a little linky link: Updated Montage as of May 30, 2010

Last Chemo: One week from today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 30 May 10 - 02:01 PM

Susan, what do you mean about celebrating it at church? How would that happen? I'm just not sure what you mean.

One thing too, and maybe this sounds really dumb, but I want to celebrate that my chemo treatments are over...

Specifically, the end of treatments could be blessed during a Sat. Svc (or privately afterwards in the chapel like we prayed for Bonnie-- a frequent post-service event as needed.) Also people have brought snacky stuff for an impromptu celebration in either the kicthen, the hallway, out on the rear lawn, or the Commons Room. Hardi can elucidate/plan/dial up or dial down according to your wishes.

~S~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 30 May 10 - 01:02 PM

Rented scooters.....yes, I had emailed the CEO about reasonable (as I am not working) hotel recommendations and a place that might rent scooters. He emailed me back saying he is working on some free accomodations and also free scooter usage. He said to hang on a month or so before I make any reservations for the room or scooter as he's pretty sure I won't have to pay for this. How cool is that?

And celebrating? I have no idea what to do..... The hospital is having a celebration on the 12th of either June or September...(I can't remember...will have to look it up) for National Cancer Survivor's Day. It's for people like me and their caregivers. Well...honestly, I could invite LOTS of people for that but since they limited the number to 2, I am taking Mom and Pete...that's a no brainer. I had 2 chemo nurses ask if I was going to go and I told them OH YEAH!!! They grinned from ear to ear and that made me feel good.

Someone told me that I should do something I've always wanted to do and after thinking about it, I'm not entirely sure what that might be. I've always wanted to do photography so maybe I need to look into that MORE and get MORE active with that on a daily basis....but as far as a once in a lifetime what do I want to do kind of thing? I have no idea. I want to be a mommy but that is in the works too. :) The other thing that comes to mind is Veronica. Her baby is due in September and as of now, no one is going to the appointments with her and she has no one to be with her during labor or the birth. I would give anything to be there with her. She is coming to visit next month and that is going to be a conversation we have. Of course I am prepared for her to say no...that's a really personal thing but I hate the idea of her going through this alone and nothing would make me happier than to be there to hold her hand through it all.

Susan, what do you mean about celebrating it at church? How would that happen? I'm just not sure what you mean.

One thing too, and maybe this sounds really dumb, but I want to celebrate that my chemo treatments are over....I'm afraid to celebrate anything resembling that the cancer is gone because it will be just about that time that it comes back. Superstitious? Maybe but there's not a chance that I'm going to push my luck about that. NONE.

Some people talk about going to far away places that they've always dreamed of and really, I don't have any aspirations of that kind...so I'd have to think some more on what it is I've always wanted to do.....strange to not know that already isn't it? I suppose it's because I'm pretty content with my life and would be wildly ecstatic to have it return to normal and be healthy.

No kayaking for today...it's beautiful but breezy and my head is cold just standing in the yard....it's always cooler out on the water...so maybe tomorrow. Instead, we are going to get some more pots for container gardening, a portable fire pit to enjoy in the evenings, a movie and then some fresh scallops to bring home for dinner with corn on the cob!   :)

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 30 May 10 - 11:38 AM

complimentary scooter We discovered not long ago that where scooters are sold, they are also often rented.

celebrate... How would you LIKE to celebrate? Please also keep in mind that your church family would like to celebrate with you (AKA see Cn CS to think about how)....

How many celebrations would you like? I mean, in addition to your personal/family celebration, won't each grouping you run into after that chemo give another occasion to celebrate with that group?

(The CA has been public, the chemo has been public, so why not celebrate in similar fashion?)

~Susan

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 30 May 10 - 10:05 AM

*Big breath*

Thanks for still hanging out here with me and knowing that I just needed a minute to regroup. What can I say? The empty shoes? The person dying right there in the chemo chair? It scares me right down to my toes.....and it breaks my heart into a million different pieces.

Onward.

I walked to and from church last night...about a mile in total. It was slow going, not painful, but really tiring. I used to zip through it....I don't care. I WALKED. I told Pete that I walked last night and he said, "What? Are you crazy?" I need to move and build my body and muscles back up. Tracy and I have been talking about that. She had 12 cycles of chemo (very different from mine...she had hers more frequently and had to wear hers home for a few days after too). Anyway, she has also gotten very weak.....much moreso than me. She is using a walker now and has physical therapy. I'm not at that point and don't think I will be but still we both need to work to rebuild muscles that have weakened due to lack of use. So...YES, I WALKED and I did it alone and whatever! I was FINE! My legs are a little sore this morning but so what?!?!? :)
    Today is a beautiful day. I woke up on my own at a reasonable hour, Pete is home, the sky is blue and there's NO WHERE I must be today! Pete made weekend coffee (orange coffee this weekend...my favorite) so we sat out on the porch in our jammies first thing!!! I love our porch!!!! I got some laundry going, more time chatting on the porch, came in to check our email and now I'm headed outside to do some potting. Today I have maybe 7 basil plants and 2 large parsley plants to pot. I also have a flat of violas that I'm not sure where I'm going with. Then there are pepper plants and the remaining tomatoes that are destined for container gardening (the romas are all in the garden). Later this afternoon we are either going kayaking or to the movies......its an absolutely perfect day and I'm a very happy bean.
    Just a note for those of you who worry about my stupidity of doing things alone....I am NOT going kayaking alone. I do have a boat that I can lift myself but it's not my favorite kayak...I'm taking the monster (60 pounds, 12 feet long) and Pete will do all the loading and unloading. He's taking his yak too and he'll fish while I poke around the edges...where all the cool swamplife lives!!!. If I get tired, he'll have a tow rope and can drag me back to shore if need be. I don't see that happening but then again, I haven't been kayaking yet this year so I don't know how my body will handle it. I am REALLY looking forward to kayaking...you have no idea! My waterproof digital camera is charging and I'm planning on doing some turtle hunting....they love to sun on submerged tree branches that are poking out.
    Anyway, time to go put some on some sunscreen and grab my garden gloves.
   Also.....I'm trying to come up with an idea for some way to celebrate my last treatment and am coming up blank. I don't have a clue.....any thoughts?
   Oh AND.....that video of the walk for the GA Ovarian Cancer Alliance? I AM WALKING IN THAT THIS YEAR!!!! I've contacted the CEO (actually, he's the one who put up my montage and has asked me to blog for them) and he's looking into complimentary housing as well as a complimentary scooter for my mom (if she comes with me) as she would have trouble walking that far. I think I can walk it....especially since this will happen in September....I might be slow but I think I can do it! YAY.
    I'm off to play in the dirt.

Love to all.

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 30 May 10 - 05:05 AM

Tracy called and told me that at her last chemo treatment (as in her final treatment), someone in the chair beside her died.

I just don't know what to say to this. How awful to be sitting next to someone, possibly sharing fear and hope while you take this treatment and to have that someone slip away.

My thoughts go out to Tracy now as well as you Michelle. I don't have words of comfort just now but the wish to comfort you is still here.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Ebbie
Date: 29 May 10 - 09:43 PM

{{{{{{Bobert}}}}}}}

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Bobert
Date: 29 May 10 - 08:55 PM

Well, thanks, Magz... They say it takes a village and we are just that: a village... And when one of our folks is down we just pull and pull... That's what this joint is all about... I firmly believe that all the positive energy and prayers that have come out as a result of this thread are going to help carry Michelle over the finish line... And her being willing to share her experiences and fears and angers and, and...

Hey, this is the "last lap" and it's been a marathon for all of us... But we've all been in it for the long haul...

Think this is a good time for a good dose of prayers and positive energy for Michelle 'cause there's no reason not to crush any remaining cancer cells into the dirt in her "victory lap"...

b~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: gnu
Date: 29 May 10 - 03:58 PM

"The Last Lap". What a title for the second last "chapter".

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 29 May 10 - 03:52 PM

LF, we're recording tonight. Have CD from last week and can send CD of tonight. Pls advise,

~S~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 28 May 10 - 06:11 PM

♡♥♬♫☼HUGS!!!!!☼✩❤♡♬♫

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 28 May 10 - 12:55 PM

Bobert, you're so good for this thread. Michelle, he has it right. You're going to cross that line and move forward from there, and the sadness along the way is an unfortunate part of the race. Don't let the adoption slow you down emotionally right now (I know, hard to do.) Take care of yourself.

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: SINSULL
Date: 28 May 10 - 12:02 PM

This is not a whinefest.
Go back to the beginning and remember the stages of mourning. Remember too that different people handle them in different order. Fear is real. Take your time to deal with it.
As to the adoption: it will happen in its own time. Do not give up. Sometimes, during the time I adopted my son, I felt that they were throwing obstacles in my way to test my resolve to adopt. Look at delays that way and prove yourself the only possible mother for your son.

But for now, crawl into a hole and cope on your own time and in your own way. We will hold down the fort until you return.

Crying is good too, Michelle, sometimes.
If I had a magic wand, I would make it all go away.
Mary

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 28 May 10 - 11:36 AM

LF, I am sure you know exactly what you need to do right now, and will do/are doing it. Our prayers go with you in it. Scooter is back in the van BTW-- pls let me know if you need it.

~S&H, The CS's

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 28 May 10 - 01:41 AM

hugs from me, too while you have your time out

sandra

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Little Robyn
Date: 28 May 10 - 12:51 AM

NZ is a long way away - come over here.
(((((((((((((((((((Michelle)))))))))))))))
Robyn
who's doing OK today

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 28 May 10 - 12:40 AM

Ok. Here's the deal.

I am going to take a day or two to regroup.

I can't stand myself in my own head.

I'm sure it all looks like a whinefest from where you sit.

I never was good at finishing things when I got tired.....and I am tired...,,and maybe that's what scares me most. I have no idea.

I'm taking all of your strength and good thoughts with me.
Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Bobert
Date: 27 May 10 - 08:59 PM

Yeah, Michelle, I fully understand that... You know, the running away part... That's normal... Like who wouldn't???

Sorry, but think of it this way... This is a marathon... Some folks have fallen by the wayside... It's sad but that is reality... You, however, have shown bursts of inner stength and you are now in sight of the finish line... You can actually see it and on the other side the rest of your cancer-free life... Hey, I'm sorry that some folks don't get to cross the finish line... My wife, Judy, didn't... But we knew early that she wasn't going to make to that finish line... Your situation is so much different... I mean, Stage 1, even possibly 2, puts you in such a good position to become the Queen of the 10,000 Club...

So, just look forward a little... Yes, that is ther finsih line you see... Just bundle up all yer Faith and cross it... Hey, you've come so far... You have done so well... You're heading for the rest of your cancer-free life... It right there in front of you... I know this...

Last lap, baby... Last lap...

b~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 27 May 10 - 08:24 PM

Gnu,

   COUNTY....not country!!!

I'm having a really bad day....that imagine just cut through me. I watched it several more times looking at the happy faces, the girls skipping, my new friend Doug who is the CEO and has asked me to write for them.....

   Got some potentially disturbing news about the adoption that may set us back AGAIN.

    Tracy called and told me that at her last chemo treatment (as in her final treatment), someone in the chair beside her died.

I've cried until my face and throat hurts...everything is swollen, my belly hurts from coughing.

I finally remembered I have Xanax and took some.

I need a break. I want to run away. Far, far away.

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: gnu
Date: 27 May 10 - 05:19 PM

GUEST... "I am one of 3 people in the county that has ovarian cancer. THREE."

I don't understand. There are only three? What country?

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 27 May 10 - 04:36 PM

Yes dear... What Mary said. Focus on the positive. Focus on what you can do everyday and remember treatments are advancing at exponential rates. Not so long ago cancer was a death sentence ... end of. That has changed so much.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: SINSULL
Date: 27 May 10 - 10:46 AM

Focus on the living breathing happy women and the little boy.
M

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: GUEST
Date: 27 May 10 - 10:44 AM

That video has rocked my world...especially the shoes and what it represents.

I am one of 3 people in the county that has ovarian cancer. THREE. One is a 5 year survivor, one has been diaganosed with Stage IV and is kind of out of her mind and then there's me. Sometimes I just feel very alone with all of this.

And seeing all those empty shoes? OMG.

All those women gone. Lost forever. Families left behind.

I just can't wrap my head around it.

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: SINSULL
Date: 27 May 10 - 09:57 AM

Write that book, Michelle!
Congratulations, girl.
What an amazing group of women in that video. And that little boy is adorable.
Mary

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 27 May 10 - 09:05 AM

Yay! Michelle! I woulda posted sooner but my computer kept crashing because of the length of this thread! Out here in the "deep rural" even highspeed is wanky.

Hooray for you!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 26 May 10 - 11:40 PM

"I'll have what she's having."

Tough way to get to this point, but your energy is astonishing, Michelle. That's a good day for "normal" circumstances. It's phenomenal for a chemo week. You've certainly managed to leave behind the time-wasting stuff, that's for sure!

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 26 May 10 - 10:35 PM

OMG. The Shoes.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 26 May 10 - 08:47 PM

Hi Guys,

    Guess what happened today? I was asked to write my story for the Georgia Ovarian Cancer Alliance!!!! :)

    Also, I thought it was Thursday and went to what I thought was my beginner yoga class.....oh well! Yoga was good anyway...sometimes, when I got tired, I just flopped on my belly, chin on my arms and windshield wipered my legs. :)

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 26 May 10 - 08:53 AM

Just reading that list exhausted me! Well done, Michelle!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Bobert
Date: 25 May 10 - 07:39 PM

Well, gol danged, Michelle... With what you got doen today maybe you oughtta see if the docs will let you re-up for a little occasional chemo after yer cancer is gone...

Whaddayathink???

B;~)

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 25 May 10 - 06:42 PM

I found my spark. I found some energy, ok, of course not in full force but I'd say a good 15x more energy than I've had in the last week. I took full advantage of it….here's my Ta-Da list for the day!

Did a load of dishes
Made breakfast including cleaning and cutting up fresh fruit
Made Watergate Salad for later
Two loads of laundry done, third about to be started
Hung clothes on the line
Banking in town
Mission for watermelon plants completed
Picked my my prescriptions
Had a healthy lunch
Planted flowers
Planted more herbs
Weeded the front flower bed
Soaked my toes and used some plum lotion on my feet….feels so nice and smells SO good!
Talked with Nana on the phone
Talked with Ang
Mowed the grass in the front, side and down the driveway…..started the orchard and got a flat
More planting of flowers
Brushed Mags (OMG…..I could make a blanket out of the amount she is shedding)
Swept the porch and the front walk
So…that's it so far. Next on my agenda is a shower. It feels good to be all sweaty and have actual dirt sticking to my body!

   I have more to do and if I get to it fine, if not, I'll do it tomorrow. I feel like I accomplished something today and have earned the right to be tired!!!!!

Michelle…..covered in dirt and sweat and a smile…..yes, this is better…MUCH better!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Ebbie
Date: 25 May 10 - 05:31 PM

Twelve HUNDRED. Neat.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 25 May 10 - 04:08 PM

:~)

She is often quicker than that. Sometimes when we don't see a post here-- I assume that it's because she is OUT having FUN.

She is very good at knowing when to do that, and DOING it, BTW. (In that, I am HER student.)

~Susan

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 25 May 10 - 01:08 PM

Pretty soon she's going to sit up again and realize she feels great. And get a bunch more stuff done in preparation for that last treatment. We're all looking forward to that last countdown!

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: katlaughing
Date: 24 May 10 - 08:47 PM

How're you doing today, Michelle? I had a restless night with a book, too. Made for a slow, tired day, but it also confirmed to me how important uninterrupted sleep is! You will get there. Until a couple of weeks ago, I was still having a lot of trouble with that; finally the biofeedback and getting over depression has had an effect and, until last night, I've had some very good sleep nights of at least 3-4 hours at a time, up for a few minutes, then another 2-3 hours. I have not been a good sleeper for years, so if there is hope for me, I know there is for you, too.:-)

You're almost done and then it's going to be so nice...no more constant trips to the chemo, the doc, the lab, etc. Just once in awhile and you can get back into your routine of yoga, gardening, cooking, cleaning, reading, whatever AND counting those curly hairs!

{{{{{HUGS}}}}}

kat

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 24 May 10 - 05:47 AM

happy reading

sandra

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 24 May 10 - 03:35 AM

Someday, it would be nice, to have a decent night's sleep.....peaceful sleep without the horrific dreams of late.

It is 3:34am. I think I'll get up, have a drink of water, shake off the latest dream and tuck back in with a book.

Arg.

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 23 May 10 - 09:39 PM

Planning a photog adventure for next weekend.....something to look forward to and focus on is a good thing!


YAY!!!!!!!!!   I can't wait.....time to charge all the cameras...might even pick up some film too....uh huh...FILM!!!!!!!!!!!!

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 23 May 10 - 09:03 PM

Struggling with frustration and my energy levels today. Would be quite happy to pitch a full blown tantrum. This article helped me put things in perspective...more easily read if printed out, but I read it online just fine....just have to scroll a bit. Well worth the time to read it if cancer has touched your life or someone you love.

http://caonline.amcancersoc.org/cgi/reprint/49/3/178.pdf

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 23 May 10 - 08:18 PM

I'm not going to push when it comes to food (not necessarily pointing to you or anything you said....I'm just sayin...).

Keerect-- main thing is, you trust the body and do not stop!

~Susan

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 23 May 10 - 05:11 PM

Back after two very busy computer-less days, but have been thinking of you through them all. I had nothing to add to the wisdom of this circle, but lots of love as you slog through the journey.

And yes, wouldn't it be great if we could stand in a circle with our arms over our shoulders and howwwwwwwwwlllllllllll the pain away!

Full moon this week- I may just go out into my woods and do a little howlin' on your behalf!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: gnu
Date: 23 May 10 - 03:31 PM

Indeed, soon... ya done good.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 23 May 10 - 01:12 PM

Bobert...
    Thanks for the reminder! I almost can't imagine it and in the same breath am SO excited to think about growing energy and getting my life back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Michelle who hopes to have curls but will be thankful for whatever hair grows back in!!!!!!!!!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Bobert
Date: 23 May 10 - 01:08 PM

Two short weeks from now and this will all be over... The chemo and the cancer!!!

Until then, take yer pills, Michelle...

Doc Bobert the Nag

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: Ebbie
Date: 23 May 10 - 01:08 PM

After chemo-driven hair loss, my sister's hair came back swirly curly. Very pretty. When she was a girl she had tendrils of curls on her forehead and later it was wavy, I remember, but evidently she all along was meant to be a curlilocks.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 23 May 10 - 12:51 PM

I posted in the Accountability thread that I had gained 13 pounds during the last chemo cycle and now, 6 days after my 5th treatment, I am down by 7 pounds. Dr. said not to worry about the gain and to just listen to what my body is asking for. I was hungry ALL THE TIME inbetween cycles.

Susan,

   You mentioned something about weight stuff and chemo and what you have seen for two others (probably more too). The thing is, there are SO many kinds of cancer and even more combinations of drugs that it's hard to tell what's going on when comparing individuals. From what I have read, for ovarian, uterine and some breast cancers, weight gain is common. As you know, I've worked very hard to lose quite a chunk of weight. I try NOT to focus on that now as it all depends what my body is able to handle and I'm not going to push when it comes to food (not necessarily pointing to you or anything you said....I'm just sayin...). I've been very happy with maintaining my weight within a 3 pound range since January (lost a huge chunk in December strictly from anxiety). So 13+ pounds concerned me....that's an awful lot for 21 days.
    And yes, my platelets did THANKFULLY go up, by quite a bit. They know that nutrition doesn't help with that (no treatment other than transfusion) BUT my intense hunger could have been a result of my body making those platelets.
    In anycase, I'm glad some of the weight has come back off and even more pleased with the increase of platelets.
    Know what else is happening? I'm finding more and more longer hairs on my head...still virtually invisible if you aren't looking for them...but baby...I look every chance I get!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 23 May 10 - 12:27 PM

Kat....I didn't think you were bossy at all...nobody was. And I DO need a reminder to take those meds and that it's ok. For the life of me, I don't know why I am so weird about it.

Today is a MUCH better day. I am making out grocery lists, reading, fussing on the net, sipping hot tea and just taking it easy in general.

Before the last treatment, I bought myself a paint by numbers kit...chickadees and purple flowers......kinda cheesy but fun!

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre - Only one more chemo to go!!
From: katlaughing
Date: 23 May 10 - 12:20 PM

Michelle, my apologies for sounding smug or bossy in my last posting. I was just trying to illustrate there is a pattern there of you not wanting to take meds and then recognizing it's okay.:-) You do sound SO much better, today.

SRS, thanks for sharing what must be a very painful memory.

One thing I noticed at the hospitals here is they are big on taking care of pain. They have a chart they show patients which helps them to identify the level of pain and they treat it. Like Tam said, though, some of the meds can leave one with other pain, esp. constipation and, in my experience, the hospitals were not good about warning about that and how to combat it.

Have a good day, Michelle.