BS: Biggest Fool

Subject: Biggest Fool
From: GUEST
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 08:41 PM

So I fell in love with the wrong person. I really thought there was a mutual feeling. After a very long period, I made sure I was not incumbered; I separated from my spouse, a troubled relationship; I moved to another state. The object of my love refused my invitation. I grew very, very lonely. Have you ever been or done anything so stupid and foolish? I should have found something selfless to give my energy towards to make me happy and fulfilled. I am pathetic and can't bring myself to use my mudcat name. I am also broked hearted, but that will mend. Geez.......

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: catspaw49
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 08:48 PM

Here I thought this was somebody flaming my ass again...........

While love may mean never having to say you're sorry, it can also mean, "Shit. Fucked up again." Move on and don't let it get you. Sometimes the magic works and sometimes the light bulbs are on sale at K-Mart.

The fact you care makes it worse but proves you to be lovable, so move on after throwing a few darts.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Sorcha
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 08:49 PM

More than once, dear Guest, more than once. The sun will rise tomorrow, and you may always be humbled when you think of this, but you can overcome/outgrow it if you work at it. Right now, YOU need to be first in your life...love yourself as you would love others.......

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: little john cameron
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 08:51 PM

RICHT ON SPAW. LJC

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: little john cameron
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 08:52 PM

an sorcha ljc

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Jon Freeman
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 09:40 PM

Guest, love can make fools of any one of us.

Jon

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: kendall
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 09:44 PM

Even me

Those who love give hostage to fate.

Subject: Lyr Add: LOVE CHANGES EVERYTHING^^
From: Mary in Kentucky
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 11:09 PM

...Love makes fools of everyone...



LOVE CHANGES EVERYTHING
Andrew Lloyd Webber

Love, love changes everything
Hands and faces, earth and sky
Love, love changes everything
How you live and how you die
Love, can make the summer fly
Or a night seem like a lifetime
Yes love, love changes everything
Now I tremble at your name
Nothing in the world will ever be the same

Love, love changes everything
Days are longer, words mean more
Love, love changes everything
Pain is deeper than before
Love will turn your world around
And that world will last forever
Yes love, love changes everything
Brings you glory, brings you shame
Nothing in the world will ever be the same

Off into the world we go
Planning futures, shaping years
Love (comes in) and suddenly all our wisdom disappears
Love makes fools of everyone
All the rules we made are broken
Yes love, love changes everyone
Live or perish in its flame
Love will never never let you be the same
Love will never never let you be the same

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: wysiwyg
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 11:12 PM

Well, anonymity can be a great thing, but do you have someone-- anyone-- to talk to about this?

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Matt_R
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 11:13 PM

Thank you Mary!! Love that song! And so true...

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Sorcha
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 11:15 PM

Other than us'ns at MudCat, she means? MudCat is better than nothing, but face to face is better......if there is nobody else, keep talking. We'll listen, we promise.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Jimmy C
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 11:16 PM

It's very difficult some time to emerge unscathed from a broken relationship, but I have to echo what both Spaw and Sorcha (and LJC) said, you have to suck it in and get on with living, for your sake, nobody elses',
You are the only one that matters now, so treat yourself with the respect and importance you deserve and go forth and forge your immediate future.

Good luck and god bless

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: GUEST
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 11:47 PM

Thank you all. Praise, you've given me a good direction. I need counseling. Thanks 'catters.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: wysiwyg
Date: 10 Jan 01 - 11:53 PM

For the most powerful {secular) counseling approach, see:

www.rc.org

All peers; free; people-based; organized approach to natural healing processes. And singing at workshops!

See me for details, contacts. (I add prayer to it, but it's designed to work on its own.)

~Susan

[e-mail]

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 12:09 AM

Praise, this(www.rc.org) is a good site. I am going to spend some time there. Muchas gracias, sweetie pie.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: GUEST,Artie (Executive Producer, Larry Sanders Sho
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 12:36 AM

Roll a joint.
Walk it off.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: wysiwyg
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 12:47 AM

If you can find the fundamentals manual, bookmark it. It moves around and can seem not to be there but it is. Check out the journal excerpts too. All true. Living it.

The videos are great too. Worth the expense. Drop me a line, huh?

~S~

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Sorcha
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 12:49 AM

Artie, I hate to have to be the one to tell you this, but there are times when a joint just isn't enough.......LOTSA times actually, if you are living in the real world.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Amergin
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 01:38 AM

Hey, Guest, I have gone through a major breakup recently....In fact, your story is very similar to mine...except I was the object of the affection....So similar is your story, that I thought you were her until you said that the one you loved rejected you....if you want to talk, I can listen....maybe we can help each other....Just remember to get up every morning...I know from personal experience that it is harder than it sounds, but it must be done....PM me if you want....Take care.

Nathan

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Amergin
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 01:42 AM

BTW Guest, you are not the only one love has made a fool of....and remember you have friends here and that we care....May the sun shine on you again...

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: GUEST,kendall
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 11:24 AM

Love is rare, life is strange
Nothing lasts, and people change.

Depressing eh?

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Irish sergeant
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 12:04 PM

Guest; If love hasn't made a fool of you then you haven't loved. Your posts tell me you are a caring person but they also tell me that you will endure. I went through a long period in my life of screwing up relationships etc. when I firmly believed I was destined to be alone forever. It passed and so shall this. In the mean time you can pm me if you so desire if you want to bend my ear. Kindest reguards, Neil

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Gervase
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 12:09 PM

Bin there, done that, and hurt a lot of people into the bargain.
But this isn't one of those "my angst is bigger than your angst" posts; I feel for you on this one.
Love may be the most wonderful thing in the world, but it can also hurt like hell. I'm surprised it's not a proscribed drug, given its potential to wreck one's life!
And, Guest, no, you're not pathetic - even if people who mean a lot to you are telling you so right now, it's only because they're hurt too. You're a valued human being, and tghe fact that you're able to express yourself here and acknowledge that things haven't gone the way they might shows that.
Things WILL get better, but meanwhile, get out there, sing and play, and don't whip yourself too much. We all fuck up - it's in our nature. And who's to say that hingsight might not one day put an entirely different perspective on today's misery? Good luck.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Morticia
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 12:29 PM

It's better to have tripped than never danced at all...but I bet it doesn't feel that way right now.Everyone's right, we've all been there....and it sucks and blows.....big time!Are you feeling foolish because you left one relationship for another or would you have done that sooner or later anyway?If the latter,this is a sucky way to start your new life but nonetheless, it is a start, not an ending.Please add me to the list of shoulders ready to get soggy, ears to get bashed etc. if you feel it would help, and it just might you know.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Amergin
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 12:32 PM

Guest, it has been helping me to know that there are people who support me in my heartbreak.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: bflat
Date: 11 Jan 01 - 08:47 PM

Woah, close to home. Forget someone who turns you down. Anyone who hurts you doesn't love you. They are too much involved with who they think they are to be able to give of themselves in a relationship. You are a quick learner, not some pathetic lovesick fool. The sun does rise and you will be okay, probably better for the experience. Don't look back, I am warning you, look forward. It is how you avoid potholes. Best Wishes.

Ellen

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Jan 01 - 09:17 AM

Thank you one and all for your support, especially those of you who have offered to be my personal supporter. You are very kind. With therapy, time and whatever else it takes, I'll get over my lonliness and heartache. My work should help provide purpose to get going and a place to retreat. BIG THANKS to'catters.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: kendall
Date: 12 Jan 01 - 09:26 AM

I'm sorry to disagree with bflat, but, the fact is no one can hurt you..no one can make you happy. That is strictly up to you. As Shakespere said "Nothing is good or bad, thinking makes them so." If a good friend tells me I'm full of shit, I will probably laugh. If someone I dont like says the same thing, I will retort. Same words, different thought process. Two and a half years ago, I lost the love of my life. I was extremely upset, but, now, I see her once in a while, and see how she interacts with her new husband, and I thing "Some things never change" and, I smile. She didn't hurt me...she did what she had to do, and I decided that it hurt.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: catspaw49
Date: 12 Jan 01 - 10:56 AM

Ya' know Kendall, once a great while, and I do mean a great while, you hit the nail right on the head. I'm big on that concept myself, so it probably means its wrong since you believe it too. But I think I'll hang onto it anyway.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: SINSULL
Date: 12 Jan 01 - 11:26 AM

Anyone who hurts you doesn't love you??? Any of you have children????

Guest,
Wallow in it for a while. You are not a fool or pathetic. A pathetic fool wouldn't feel as deeply about this as you do. Learn from it - if you find you are attracted to the same person in another body, notice the red flags. You will probably wander in any way but at least you will be prepared.
"Fools rush in where angels fear to tread"
How else could someone as normal as Karen end up married to Spaw?

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: bflat
Date: 12 Jan 01 - 12:59 PM

Kendall, I have to agree with you. Not a good choice of words in my post. It is always how you choose to deal with the matter that in the end results in your pain or your gain. Thanks for the insight.

Ellen

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: catspaw49
Date: 12 Jan 01 - 01:09 PM

Actually Sins, I always figured I just caught her on an off day.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: SINSULL
Date: 12 Jan 01 - 08:32 PM

Don't be a fool, Spaw. She saw you and wanted you. You didn't have a prayer.

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: Troll
Date: 12 Jan 01 - 09:21 PM

SINS is right, 'Spaw. Actually, I rather admire your taste in women if Karen is any example.
Can't say much for her taste in men though. **BG**

troll

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: GUEST
Date: 21 Jan 01 - 07:46 AM

Here is an update. I was right about myself. I am a fool but that doesn't make me a bad person, and I could be much worse things. I am seeing a therapist for my issues. It did help my mental state just to start this thread and face the reality of what is. Prior to that, it was just me and my thoughts and they weren't doing me any good. But,YOU have! Great bunch of people!

Subject: RE: BS: Biggest Fool
From: John P
Date: 21 Jan 01 - 07:59 AM

I don't mean to sound flippant, but there is a great song around somewhere that might be pertinent to this thread. It's called "Why Does Love Make Us Stupid" or something like that. Does anyone know it?

John