Gig bloopers - did I sing that???

Subject: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Maryrrf
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 09:16 AM

Like most people who do anything remotely Irish I've had a lot of gigs recently. Gigs that take place right after work are hard because my work absolutely drains and exhausts me and I can't stand it(I'm gearing myself up for a change of jobs)but that's another topic. Anyway I find that fatigue is a big factor in forgetting lyrics, etc. This week I sang (by request) Fields of Athenry. I always try to do it well, with proper emotion, but somehow I sang "Against the Crammin' and the Frown" instead of "Famine and the Crown". Quick glance told me nobody noticed but then I had to continue the song while supressing giggles. My last song was "The Parting Glass" which I try to do in a solemn, moving way only instead of saying "I'll gently rise and softly call" I sang "I'll gently rise and softly fall". Ridiculous image came to my mind and it was hard to supress the laughter, but as far as I could tell, although everybody seemed to be listening they didn't appear to notice. Just goes back to our stage fright thread - even if you make a mistake nothing terrible will happen!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Charley Noble
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 09:37 AM

There's nothing can fill my heart with more cheer,
Than to lie in a pub with my face in my beer.

Alternative last lines to "The Old Rose & Crown" which cropped up unbidden one night.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: gnu
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 10:09 AM

" although everybody seemed to be listening they didn't appear to notice."

Simple explanation is that the Irish are a well mannered and conservative bunch, especially in a pub.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Amos
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 10:37 AM

Well, either that or they were watching the singer's chest instead of listeniing to the words! :>)

A

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: MMario
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 11:13 AM

When I was learning "Sailor's Prayer" for some reason the finla line of the verse kept coming out "Who sell bad steel to whalers"

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Jeri
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 11:19 AM

Honestly, there is one song where I "spoonerise" a couple of words consistently, but I seem to be blocking the memory at the moment.

Not specific to gigging, but I have, a couple of times, started belting out the chorus to a parody when someone was doing the straight version. I'm not exactly quiet, but usually I'm quick enough to catch myself.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: DMcG
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 12:15 PM

Not a gig, but in church! There's a hymn that is usually sing as line1, line2, line3,line4 but at Easter is more commonly sung line1, Alleluia, Alleluia, line2, Alleluia, Alleluia etc etc.

I started singing the long version when every else was singing the shorter form and was a complete verse out of sync with everyone else before they managed to kick me into noticing!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: sophocleese
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 12:52 PM

My partner likes to sing The Millworker's Song but he has a hard time remembering to sing "My grandfather blew in off the water." instead of "My grandfather blew off in the water." A small change perhaps but it makes a difference.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: gnu
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 02:51 PM

I know this doesn't count, but the lads and I used to sing, "And never ya dare, to go give old McGuire, the F***IN CHAIR." Late in the evening at a family reunion, I gave eyes all round and received nods, so I did it the way we always did, but none of the other lads did. Embarassing ? Slightly !

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Bonnie Shaljean
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 04:46 PM

And then there was the memorable moment when, during a rendition of John Prine's "Paradise", instead of "Mr. Peabody's coal train" I sang - loud and clear - "Mr. Coalbody's pee train".

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: khandu
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 06:33 PM

Not really a "gig" as such, but nonetheless, it was before quite a few people. I wasn't singing, I was give a sermon (years ago, when I was a minister).

I was speaking of Samson killing 1000 Philistines with the jaw bone of an ass. But when I said it, it came out "the ass bone of a Jew". A few people giggled but I could not figure out why. I reiterated my point and said it again. More laughter from more people.

To my embarrassment, I actually said it a third time before my own ears caught what I had said. By this time, the whole congregation was ROTFLTAO!

I have made a few spoonerisms while singing, but they do not bother me after the ass I made of myself on the pulpit.

khandu

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Joe_F
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 06:49 PM

Not *my* gig, but I once alerted those present at a sing to an upcoming concert by the New Lost Silly Ramblers.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: gnu
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 06:50 PM

A friend of mine that I met in Wabush, Labrador, had a radio program in Cold Lake, Alberta, a Canadian Air Force base. John left his employ, never being able to recover from report one day that the pilot of a fighter had ejaculated to safety.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: John P
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 08:03 PM

Once when we were doing "The Trees Grow High", instead of singing "all the young men playing at the ball" my wife splurted out "all the young men playing with their balls". We had a huge audience but sadly enough I don't think anyone noticed.

John

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: 53
Date: 16 Mar 02 - 11:30 PM

They are fun to look back on, but terrible when they are happening.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Hrothgar
Date: 17 Mar 02 - 04:34 AM

We did a presentation on "Songs of the American Civil War" a few years ago.

We did the parody of "Hard Times Come Again No More" called "Hard Crackers Come Again No More." When we did it, we had a hard time singing "hard crackers" instead of the "hard Time" we were all conditioned to - but afterwards, I found myself singing "hard crackers" instead of "hard times."

In the same presentation, our lead sang that immortal line "He is trampling out the vintage where the rapes of grath are stored."

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: SeanM
Date: 17 Mar 02 - 04:43 AM

Not so much a 'spoonerism' but still a wonderful blooper for a group I was with...

We were singing "South Australia" acapella, and keep in mind we'd been doing this one for a while... As we were rolling along, we simultaneously all forgot the same verse. Kinda ground us to a halt for a moment as we all did the "what the hell was that?" check...

M

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 03:23 AM

Maybe it's early stage Alzheimers--dunno. I have a strong tendency towards auditory processing of information, so homophonic bloopers often crop up. Spoonerism also "R me."

Here are a few of my best bloopers.

Song: Hey, Good Lookin'

I sang: How's about keepin' somethin' up for me?
(instead of "How's about cookin' somethin' up with me?)
I repeated the line several times throughout the song!

Song: "Harrigan"
I sang "H-A-double R-I-G-A-N spells Harrigan, Tired of all the Irish blood that's in me..."
instead of "Proud of all the Irish blood..."

Song: Edelweiss
I sometimes spoonerise: "Blossom of snow, may you groom and blow,
Groom and blow forever"

Song: Easter Parade
Don't ask me why, but on occasion, I can't quit singing:
...On the Avenue, Swift Avenue..." instead, of course, of "Fifth Avenue."

And then, in the printed word realm, excellent speller though I be, I printed song books up with "Cockles and Muscles" in them, repeating "muscles" for "mussles" all the way though the song. Singing the song from the book, of course, did not help me catch the error for a long time!

Genie

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,MC Fat
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 04:38 AM

We sometimes sing 'New York Girls - All you New York girls can you poke the dancer and rather rudely in 'Step it up Mary' sing 'show your c**t to the electric man.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Watson
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 05:50 AM

In Polly on the Shore, it's all too easy to sing:
And here am I, lying on the bleeding deck
instead of:

And here am I, lying a-bleeding on the deck.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: KingBrilliant
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 06:12 AM

Even when I sing the right words they somehow turn against me. Hammerite & I sing an old Alison Moyet song called Bad Connection - which in the chorus has the line "I've been calling all day". Unfortunately as we sang it I started to hear it as "I've been Colin all day". As mentioned elsewhere, people are not always paying attention - so there were a lot of bewildered faces when I said afterward that I had not in fact been Colin at all that day - Colin himself looked particularly worried...
And then there was the horrible moment when I was singing a wondrously soulful rendition of The Water is Wide, and the entire pub and myself simultaneously noticed the double-entendre inherent in "I put my finger into some soft bush". It was hard to keep a straight face after that. I think I actually blushed..

Kris

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: DonMeixner
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 08:49 AM

Hopefully, Art will tell of a version a friend of his sang to The Golden Vanity, very funny.

When we do Patsy Fagan it's impossible not to sing Fatsy Pagan.

And every once in a while I scare hell out of the boys by doing "I slit the sheet the sheet I slit, upon the slitted sheet I sit." to an elegant crowd in a theater.

Don

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,Lynn
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 02:51 PM

In a recording session once I was doing a gospel tune called "The Old Account", singing in the first verse:

"...an old account was standing of singers unforgiven".

I should have been 'sinners', but then us singers need a good deal of forgiveness too!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Spartacus
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 03:24 PM

It's funny this thread appeared today. I had a gig on saturday, and a steel guitar playing friend of mine was playing a variation of "walking blues". One of his lines ended with "feet" and he forgot the next line. He improvised with "push my meat". I don't know what that means, but it scares me a little....

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Musicman
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 08:39 PM

ummmmmmm...... started the song with the whole band, instrumental intro........

and drew a total blank on the melody i was supposed to be singing......

did a quick switch to another song..... never did go back and try it again.... :))

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Maryrrf
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 09:07 PM

Yes, those total blank outs happen and sometimes it's so unexpected - it could be a song you've been singing since you were three. Must have been terrible when things like that happened back in the days of live television!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Coyote Breath
Date: 18 Mar 02 - 11:13 PM

Well how about "spiralling memory loss" I was starting From "Earth to Heaven" and got the first verse out just fine. I started into the second verse: blank! so I decided to quickly hit the third verse instead: blank again! I stopped and went to another Dave Macon song, "All in Down and Out Blues". I got past "Hippity hop to the bucket shop" but total crash. By this time I was panicking! I joked a bit, trying desperately to save things when some lovely person called out "we love you anyway, Tom!" and all at once I got back on track and did a great set. Never did find out who had called out.

CB

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From:
Date: 19 Mar 02 - 04:25 AM

When sining "Grey Cockeral", I streuggle with the line.."So snowly were her milk white breasts" I always want to sing "So milky were her snow white breasts".

Ho hum

Paul

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 19 Mar 02 - 05:21 AM

Every time I sing "Snowbird, " I have a hard-to-suppress urge to sing, "Spread your f**ing wings and fly away." (instead of "tiny wings")

Blackouts - - ah, yes-- it's easy to sort of go on automatic pilot when repeating the same set of songs over and over. This last week I did a bunch of St. Patrick's parties for retirement residences, with the oft-requested US favorites, e.g., Irish Eyes, Galway Bay, etc. being repeated several times a day. I was singing "Too-Ra-Loo-Ra-Loo-Ral" at a party on Sunday, and when it came to the second verse, I spontaneously slipped into the second verse of Mother, Machree and got got halfway through the second line before I realized I had merged two songs. (They have very similar chord structure, meter, etc.) The audience, who were singing along from songbooks, noticed right away, of course.

Genie

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Janie
Date: 19 Mar 02 - 09:01 AM

Just want to thank all of you for sharing your Freudian slips and such. I laughed until I had tears running reading some of these.

Janie

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 19 Mar 02 - 02:31 PM

khandu,
Re: your "the ass bone of a Jew," the Rev. Spooner couldn't've said it better!

LMAO

Genie §;-D

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Celtic Soul
Date: 19 Mar 02 - 07:17 PM

It wasn't a spoonerism, but this past weekend, we were singing one of 2 songs that have the *very same* intro, and are in the *very same* key. The person who starts off the song could not get the melody right. He wanted to sing the lyrics of the correct song, and the melody of the other, and all he could do was look at the rest of us with this "What the hell is happening here?" look on his face, until I sang the right melody for him...

with the wrong words. I don't think he'll forgive me anytime soon, but it got a good laugh.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,Skivee
Date: 20 Mar 02 - 01:06 AM

From a noted local Scottish fiddler: She was singing in front of hundreds,on tour in her youth and got to part of a song about a lass disgusted with the men. Instead of singing," Before I'd have a man, I'd rather take a parrot", she sang,"Before I'd take a man, I'd rather take a carrot". it took a beat for all, including her to realize the implication.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Coyote Breath
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 12:14 AM

hoo boy! I'd a luved to have been there!

CB

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Peter Kasin
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 04:18 AM

I was rehearsing a song with another ranger. She was singing "When I Was A Fair Maid" and I was coming in on the choruses. When it got to "I'll put on my cap and feathers..." I misheard and sang it as "I'll put on my captain's feathers..."! We got a good laugh at my mondegreen.

chanteyranger

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Jim Krause
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 02:51 PM

Closest thing that immediately comes to mind is the time I was doing a late night gig in a bar. It was coming up on closing time and I had the time to do about two songs before the barkeep called for last round. It was his call "Last call for alcohol!" that woke me up. I had actually fallen asleep standing up, and SINGING all the while. I have no idea what I was singing.
Jim

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Madam Gashee
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 03:38 PM

One of my favourites was

"Shitter clip, the Marco Polo" (instead of clipper ship.

We tend to hold our breath everytime he sings that now!

Also from Ben Backstay
"At night his ghostless head appears..."
(not headless ghost!)

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,maryrrf
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 03:45 PM

Today I ran into somebody who'd been to the concert where I committed the two what I considered blatant and very obvious bloopers that started this thread. He was sitting up front and looked very attentive through the whole thing. He told me how much he'd enjoyed it (I was relieved because I hadn't felt I was in very good form that night). I asked him casually if he'd noticed that I'd gotten some of the lyrics mixed up, probably due to the fact that I was tired after a hard week at work. He said he hadn't and I think he was telling the truth.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,ciarili
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 07:19 PM

There was a local guy, Carlos ???, who used to do Cat Stevens' Wild World, and he used to sing:

But if you wanna leave, take good care I hope you have a lot of nice things to wear But remember there's a lot of bad underwear.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: JennieG
Date: 21 Mar 02 - 07:26 PM

At a festival last year a singer was presenting a workshop and had a couple of sweet young things singing chorus with him...when they got halfway through one song the girls collapsed in giggles and couldn't continue singing. They gathered themselves together and tried again...same result. So Duncan told us why - it seems that in rehearsal, instead of singing "furtive parsons" the girls sang "fartive persons" and every time they tried to sing that song they couldn't get near that line without breaking up. Of course after that the audience held their breath but the singers all got it right!
Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Charley Noble
Date: 22 Mar 02 - 08:23 AM

We were singing "Bully in the Alley" to help introduce nautical writer James Nelson at a bookstore signing. The chorus is supposed to run:

So help me, Bob, I'm bully in the alley!

And I burst forth with:

So help me, GOD, I'm bully in the alley!

Reducing my shanty chorus mates to either hysterical giggles or slack-jawed shock.

Oh, well, that's what the original line probably meant in dockside rhyming slang.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mr Happy
Date: 25 Mar 02 - 05:40 AM

i sang the rising of the moon at a fc in weston some years ago and the audience erupted into an enormous giffaw when i came out with 'and a thousand men were flashing by the rising of the moon'

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Callie
Date: 26 Mar 02 - 12:20 AM

In "Bread and Roses" I once sang

"No more the DRUNKEN IDLER"

instead of

"no more the drudge and idler".

And to my great embarassment, I once introduced a song about Bougainville freedom as "here's a song from Papua New Guinea". D'OH!!!! Perhaps you have to live in a Pacific Island nation to understand what a terrible blunder this is!!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: TonyK
Date: 26 Mar 02 - 01:53 PM

I was tired and on auto-pilot late in the evening, trying to reach the crowd in a country club bar where everyone was my father's age. I decided to do Carolina In The Morning and didn't realize I had sung the blisteringly bawdy first line of the parody until a friend of my wife's called out from the back "Oh Tony!". Too late to pull that one back through the microphone. That was 20 years ago and I can still hear her say it as clear as a bell. But, as has been said earlier, no one else seemed to notice. But if I could have one 'do-over', I'd take it right there, for sure.
TonyK

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,Sonja
Date: 26 Mar 02 - 10:19 PM

In the song "Soon It's Gonna Rain," from "The Fantasticks!" there is the line, "...Then we'll let it rain, rain pell mell." Every time I hear it or sing it, I want to sing, "Then we'll let it rain, rain like hell..."

Happiness, that's a GREAT image--all those "thousand men... flashing" in the moonlight!

Sonja

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Trevor
Date: 27 Mar 02 - 09:10 AM

Keith, who gets the music for our band Rapsquillion together, snuck in a page for a gig with, instead of '..the glory of his resurrection...', '...the glory of his red erection...'. On stage is not a good place to be confronted with something of that ilk!

The little chamber choir I sing with were doing something a few months back - can't remember what it was called, but there was a line in it 'Ah, said the cow....'. I'm sure that only our director and I realised how it sounded. The fact that most of the rest of the choir are pretty straight-laced made it even funnier until I could control it no longer and exploded into laughter along with the director, and couldn't get anywhere near the line for the rest of the evening.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: wlisk
Date: 27 Mar 02 - 11:10 AM

During practice our group was doing Midnight on the Water, to which I sang the words "Midnight on the squater a long time ago." We all cracked up, but every now and then when we perform that song, a little urge comes over me....

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: PageOfCups
Date: 28 Oct 02 - 07:56 PM

Two stories about gig bloopers, both involving "Whiskey in the Jar." (Fortunately, I was in the audience, not on the stage!)

One: The singer was having a rough night, I guess. First he promoted Captain Farrell to Colonel. I looked up at him, surprised, and saw that he knew he'd changed the lyrics.   Then the robber took the loot "home to Nancy," instead of Jenny. My companions and I exchanged glances, and one of us said, quietly, "No wonder Jenny turns him in!" The singer must have been able to read lips, because he fumbled a bit, demoted Farrell back to Captain the next verse, and Nancy wasn't heard from again.

Two: I'd seen a Mondegreen for the line "stand and deliver for you are a bold deceiver" which went "stand on your liver for you are a gold retriever," and I had to share it with a friend who's a singer. He'd already sung the song earlier, but decided to do it again with the Mondegreen so see if anybody else in the audience noticed. When nobody did, *he* almost broke up. Oh well.

PoC

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,Gorgeous Gary
Date: 28 Oct 02 - 09:53 PM

PoC: I actually have a parody somewhere in my tapes of "Whiskey In The Jar" about a faithful golden retriever...

The one blooper I can remember came early in the a.m. at a filk convention. I was trying to sing Christine Lavin's "Ballad of Doris and Edwin: The Movie". In the original song, their meeting at the elevator is described as "His hands were full/she held the door for him/and he said thanks."

Due probably to the lack of sleep, I suffered pronoun trouble and sang "His hands were full/**HE** held the door for him/and he WHOOPS!" (as both the circle and I broke into laughter...).

-- Gary

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Carly
Date: 28 Oct 02 - 10:35 PM

When I first began singing in public, at the urging of my college roommate and lifelong friend Merle Schlesinger( now Roesler,) I felt safer singing with her than alone. Eventually, she talked me into a solo (I'll play banjo for you, said she,) for one of our first big gigs. Over and over I practiced, working hard to keep my enunciation
clear. Came the big night, I launched into Misty Moisty Morning and the words poured out.I was elated-I can sing!-until out came,very clearly, "I'll plough and sow and reap and mow, and you shall spit and sin." ! I looked at Merle-big mistake- and she began to giggle.
The audience laughed, I laughed, we all laughed-Merle and I tried to go on, but it was hopeless. We never did finish that song.

Carly Gewirz

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mr Happy
Date: 29 Oct 02 - 03:33 AM

some friends went to hear pavarotti sing at a concert.

afterwards they were telling us about it and one of our fiends said 'and he did Des & Norma too!'- [nessun dorma]

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: belfast
Date: 29 Oct 02 - 11:24 AM

At an informal singing session in Clare a woman I know was singing "Blackwaterside". She realized that she was repeating a verse and glanced around in mild panic for someone to give her a clue as to the next verse. The next verse begins, "Go home, go home to your father dear." A companion leaned across the table and whispered loudly, "Go home, go home." A fella at the bar, unaware of what was going on, shouted, "You leave her alone! She's f***ing brilliant!"

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 29 Oct 02 - 12:50 PM

LOL, belfast!

Mr Happy -- "Des & Norma!" Somebody's gotta write THAT parody! (Where is Allan Sherman when you need him?)

Joan, Gary, I'd love to hear that "Whiskey" parody ("stand on your liver for you are a gold retriever").

Genie

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Elektra
Date: 30 Oct 02 - 10:25 AM

While not nearly as spectacular as some of the aforementioned, at a gig a few weeks ago during "Star of the County Down" I sang "no pipe I'll yoke, no horse I'll smoke..." no one in the audience seemed to notice except my best friend, but I immedately squeezed my eyes shut to avoid making eye contact or I would have completely lost it. It was all I could do to finish the song without falling down from laughter/embarrassment. The visual was FAR too disturbing. ;-)

Of course every time I sing it now I have to concentrate REALLY hard 'cause it cracks me up & won't go away. D'oh!

*Eletra*

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Malveka
Date: 30 Oct 02 - 11:14 AM

At a Christmas party sing at work a few years ago we were using lyric sheets that had been hastily typed up the night before. We joyously sang out:

"Hark the herald, angels sin ..."

Now, of course, we sing it that way every year. For want of a letter, all meaning may change! There are some magnificient bloopers in this thread. Love the previous one. Restraint from smoking a horse would indeed seem wise, LOL!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Leadfingers
Date: 30 Oct 02 - 02:28 PM

In the Bold Fisherman i keep having the urge to sing 'He took her by her lily white hand which was his FOUL intent'.so far I have not succombed

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mr Happy
Date: 31 Oct 02 - 03:59 AM

'no pipe i'll smoke, no hoarse, i'll choke'?

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: open mike
Date: 31 Oct 02 - 11:11 PM

my woopsie was with the Health to the Company
where in the second verse I found myself singing:
"as she sits on my countenance and smiles on my knee"
instead of the other way around--I am cardful on the
second verse fromnow on!@!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 01 Nov 02 - 04:18 PM

LOL, open mike!!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 12:52 AM

I just recently learned "Star Of The County Down," and, though I know the real lyrics, I find myself wanting to sing:

"...She looked so sweet from her two left feet to the sheen of her nut-brown hair ...  ." Haven't slipped up yet, but I'm sure I will one of these days.

G

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: open mike
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 02:19 AM

I always have to watch myself on the "Health to the Company"
where it says:"As she smiles on my countenance and she sits on my knee"
I am hoping i never slip up and sing "as she sits on my countenance.."

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: KJ
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 02:19 PM

'The sheep are in the meadow the cow's got the horn'....ooops
'Come all you gardners gay' is another one.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,celtaddict
Date: 26 Mar 03 - 06:52 PM

Maryrrf, I have always heard that line as "I'll gently rise and I'll softly fall," and supposed it was just my mind, though a friend and I do keep an ongoing list of Highly Suspect Lyrics.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 06 Jul 03 - 07:44 AM

I was singing "Star Of The County Down" recently, and I THINK I was about to conclude the chorus, at one point, with:
"She's the cow of the starry down."

I don't really know, because all I got out was "...she's the cow of..." before I cracked up and couldn't finish the line!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 06 Jul 03 - 10:51 AM

"I'll gently rise and softly fall" in the post that started this thread (last year) from The Parting Glass.

Actually I'd not be surprised if those were the original words. I've got a theory that it's a pre-hanging song anyway, by someone who is going to be strung up in the morning, in the morning, probably a highwayman or something like that. That's the image I get from the lines "Since it falls unto my lot that I should rise and you should not".

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Ely
Date: 06 Jul 03 - 08:59 PM

My college band and I got onstage at a charity bluegrass concert one night; we were never known for our polish but we didn't usually embarrass ourselves this badly. First, our ordinarily mild-tempered fiddler dropped his bow and blurted out, "Sh*t!" into the microphone--in front of an audience of retirees, no less. We got through "Big Scioty" just fine, but when we went on to "Hell on the Wabash", which sounds nothing like "Big Scioty" all six of us at once forgot the B part and kept slipping back into "Big Scioty". Finally, after two restarts, we gave up, apologized to the audience, and switched to A.

We rarely sang or I'm sure we would have come up with some doozy spoonerisms, too.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: DonMeixner
Date: 06 Jul 03 - 10:42 PM

In The Broad Black Brimmer I've turned an "Old Trench Coat" into "Old French Toast"

In Weevily Wheat I've changed "Wheat in the Ear" to "Wheat in the Rear."

In Bold O'Donnahue we have changed "Squeeze her, Ach!" to "Squeeze her rack"

Some times its all too easy.

Don

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mr Happy
Date: 24 Sep 03 - 07:20 AM

One Christmas week, we were all in the usual singaround session in a local pub.

Midway through doing the usual folk tunes & songs, the landlord asked could we do some carols & Xmas songs.

We were happy to oblige & had done some festive offerings, then one of our number began to sing 'Once in royal David's city', accompanying himself on 12 sting.

Some of us soon noticed that the tune wasn't the usual one yet it sounded familiar.

Unfortunately the singer didn't realise until he came to the line 'mary was that mother mild, Jesus Christ her little child' & then with a most complex expression on his face seemed compelled to sing 'Hark the herald angels sing!' to fit the rest of the tune!


MAAAAAAAHvellous!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Snuffy
Date: 24 Sep 03 - 09:21 AM

In 'Martinmas Time' I once sang:

She's took the ribbons from her legs
And the garters from her hair-o.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,Kim C no cookie
Date: 24 Sep 03 - 09:48 AM

One time during Wind and Rain, Mister sang "dead on the water like a frozen swan" instead of "golden swan."

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Chief Chaos
Date: 24 Sep 03 - 01:08 PM

Can't discuss where it came from but I got a message about a team using "exploding dogs" instead of explosive sniffing dogs. I fell out of my chair I was laughing so hard.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Blowzabella
Date: 24 Sep 03 - 05:22 PM

This isn't a 'gig' blooper, but a brill one none the less, that I hope you'll agree is worth sharing. My husband is a lectuer at an agricultural college and he was in the staff room with a colleague who was looking at exam papers.

The question had clearly been something along the lines of 'How do you tell when a cow is in season and ready to take to the bull'.

The given answer by this, now immortalised student was 'Females on heat have red Volvos'!!!!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Joybell
Date: 24 Sep 03 - 06:21 PM

Oh boy! have I been there too. Usually no one notices 'till I giggle - they hear what they expect. I also always hear some alternate meanings too. I can't sing "Four Strong Winds" without wondering if he will ".... get there before the snow flies...." What if the snow-flies get there first I worry. And are they related to ice-worms?
re Hard Times, by the way, There was a Civil War parody called "Hard Tack Come Again no More" It's really just of intrest as a historical comment. Like most parodies it dated quickly.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Joybell
Date: 24 Sep 03 - 06:38 PM

And then there's the first lines of the Australian national anthem -
"Australians all eat ostriches."
Not a mistake I'm sure, although it supposedly comes from little school children. Makes the song much more singable and enjoyable when you can't get out of singing it.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Joybell
Date: 28 Sep 03 - 07:35 AM

And then there's High Noon with the line - "... sposin' I lose my fair-haired beauty .." I see a big handsome cowboy with a comb in his hand, in front of a mirror, worrying about his looks. What if he should get shot in the hair!!!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 28 Sep 03 - 07:55 AM

Blowzabella...

are you related to the group that i have the music books for?

Great stuff!

Robin

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Ely
Date: 28 Sep 03 - 07:30 PM

Not a gig blooper, but my best friend and I used to be big Everly Brothers fans. We were singing merrily along to "Rip it Up" one day, which starts out, "Saturday night, I just got paid . . . " and she accidentally substituted an "L" for the "P".

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: CraigS
Date: 28 Sep 03 - 09:10 PM

I used to be in a covers band with a vocalist who insisted on singing "I can see clearly now the rain has gone, I can see all testicles in my way" becauyse his wife had written out his lyrics that way.

His wife was a master of Malapropisms, her classic being "Look at all that compensation running down the window" one cold night!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: black walnut
Date: 29 Sep 03 - 10:48 AM

I drew a total blank in Another Train (Pete Morton). I sat there thinking and thinking about how to start a verse while strumming away. All of a sudden it came to me: "WE CRAWL IN THE DARK SOMETIMES AND THINK TOO MUCH"!

~b.w.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mr Happy
Date: 02 Oct 03 - 04:39 AM

There's a guy comes to the many sessions round this area, & often sings 'Me & you & a dog named Boo'.

There's a line in it that sounds like, 'Another attack of gas, then I'm back on the road again'

Somehow I don't think thats quite right?

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Splott Man
Date: 02 Oct 03 - 05:06 AM

My favourite was from my good friend Rory Furlong While singing Green Fields Of France, he dried after the line
"..and for Willie McBride it's all happened again..."

For those unfamiliar with said song, the next line is
"...and again, and again, and again, and again."

In this instance EVEYONE noticed.

regards

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Naemanson
Date: 02 Oct 03 - 07:21 AM

I don't think this counts because it's deliberate but, depending on the audience I will add an 's to one line from South Australia. That makes it:

There's just one thing that grieves my mind,
Heave away, haul away,
To leave Miss Nancy Blair's behind...

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,hacksawbob
Date: 02 Oct 03 - 08:04 AM

Irish Rover
There was old Mickey Coot who played hard on his flute
when the the ladies lined up for the set he was tootling with skill to each sparkling quadrill though the dancers were flutered an bet
with his smart witty talk he was cock of the walk
and he rolled the dames under and over
you could tell at a glance when he TOOK OFF HIS PANTS!
that he sailed on the Irish Rover

I've left it in, much better than the original 'took up his stance.'

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: alanabit
Date: 02 Oct 03 - 10:59 AM

When I was at The Royal Hospital School, (a sort of hooligan factory for the sons of seamen) back in the sixties, seven hundred boys stood on parade one Sunday morning. The Chief Naval Instructor, Commander Lamb RN (rtd) addressed the assembled ranks with the words, "When you see me with my hands in your pockets, you can put your hands in mine!"
It was a rather unfortunate turn of phrase for one of the most senior members of staff at that institution, in which a beating was mandatory for any homosexual activity!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: synbyn
Date: 02 Oct 03 - 03:31 PM

Once in a very blue moon: first line from banjo Rob:
"I found your ladder in my mailbox today..."

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Forsh
Date: 02 Oct 03 - 03:46 PM

First time I heard someone singing John Prine's Illegal Smile, I thought they were singing 2and you may see me tonight, with a billy goat smile" .. seemed to fit in with the dope theme!
Dad Forsh used to dice with death on stage, by adding this verse to Hog's Eye Man: 'I'm not a pheasant Plucker I'm a pheasant Pluckers son and I'm only pluckin' feathers till the pheasant plucker comes' I have cocked this one up, too. As far as the 'Folk Process' is concerned, I am one of it's main exponents. I must've sang more wrong lines than anyone I know, I know that there are those who will say I should learn the right words, and I do, it's just I forget them, and anyways, sometimes 'my' words fit better!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Tyke
Date: 03 Oct 03 - 02:57 PM

refresh

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mr Happy
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 08:47 AM

When I've performed 'Weapon of Prayer' there's a repeated line

'While the boys so bravely stand
With their weapons made by hand'

which has sometimes drawn sniggers with the audients singing

'....With their weapons in their hands!'

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Jack Campin
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 09:43 AM

> From a noted local Scottish fiddler: She was singing in front of hundreds,
> on tour in her youth and got to part of a song about a lass disgusted with the
> men. Instead of singing," Before I'd have a man, I'd rather take a parrot",
> she sang,"Before I'd take a man, I'd rather take a carrot". it took a beat for
> all, including her to realize the implication.

You're thinking of "The Old Maid in the Garret". Both endings are traditional, but you more often hear "carrot" these days. If there was a mistake, it was just doing the wrong version for the occasion.

[The Parting Glass]
: I've got a theory that it's a pre-hanging song anyway, by someone who is going
: to be strung up in the morning

Sir Walter Scott thought it was exactly such a monologue, for the Border reiver Thomas Armstrong, hanged in Edinburgh in 1601. He didn't have any evidence for this that we know about.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mo the caller
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 09:48 AM

I'd quite like to sing the occassional song in sessions, I've practised 'The Next Market Day', but I always get tangled up with
"To sell for her Mammy three hanks of fine yarn"

I'm sure there shouldn't be any Yanks in that song.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mr Happy
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 09:50 AM

I've always sung it as 'I'll gently rise and softly call ......

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mark Ross
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 10:33 AM

Thirty some years ago, I played at Democratic Socialist annual dinner , handing out their Eugene Debs-Norman Thomas award. At the end of the festivities I was asked to sing SOLIDARITY FOREVER to close the evening and reversed the opening line;
"When the workers inspiration through the union's blood shall run."

However, I don't think that that qualifies as a blooper, 'cause I did it on purpose! Boy were the Union pie cards in attendance pissed at me.

Mark Ross

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Peace
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 11:05 AM

Was part of the congregation one day in church. The hymn was "What a Friend we Have in Jesus". An old friend named Lindsay Cameron (now passed on) had given forth an alternate version one evening while we were trading songs, BSing and having a few(?) beer. Anyway, I conflated the two, and in a loud voice sang, "What a friend we have in Jesus, Christ Almighty what a pal". I was given more than a few looks. I 'slunk' away after the service.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mr Happy
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 11:09 AM

LOL!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Seamus Kennedy
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 11:43 AM

While singing the Day of the Clipper from my new sea-songs CD (shameless plug!), I sang, "You'll know the CRIPPLE'S day has come again.

Twice! Couldn't help myself. Some folks noticed, but they thought I was being funny.

While doing The Band Played Waltzing Matilda one night, my mind went walkabout and I noticed the audience looking at me strangely.
I woke up and realized I was singing the same verse twice, so I just said to them, "Hey, I really like that verse, OK?"

Kinda spoiled the emotional impetus of the song, but I got a cheap laugh.

Seamus

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Acorn4
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 11:53 AM

We do a trad song called "The Captain Cried" - we both, at the same time, turned "lamenting and sighing" into "cementing and lying"

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 11:55 AM

When I wrote "Lowestoft Rock" and played a rough recording to my (then 17-year old) daughter, as it got to the chorus she blushed to her ears and afterwards said all embarassed: "I don't understand, why do you talk about a large penis in the chorus?".

I explained to her that the lyrics said in fact "large beamers" (trawlers)... I was extra careful with this line on the final recording.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,TJ in San Diego
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 12:07 PM

Back in my earliest years of song, one of the staples (believe it or don't) was "Michael, Row The Boat." I was so sick of being asked to do it that once, while appearing very solumn and singing with great feeling, I perversed the verse, "River Jordan is deep and wide....clean rest rooms on the other side." Some appeared genuinely hurt, as if betrayed. Others roared, knowingly. I know it's not original, but sometimes it just works.

It wasn't singing, but when a famous golfer and his wife appeared on the Johnny Carson "Tonight" show years ago, the host asked the Mrs. how she wished her husband luck before a tournament. Her answer, "I kiss his balls."

One of my favorite "bloopers" was actually a costume malfunction that affected the preposterous prefrontal superstructure of Dolly Parton during a show in San Diego with Kenny Rogers some years back. With true "the show must go on" panache, she said, "Sorry, folks; I didn't mean to moon y'all," as she tucked herself back in and continued her song without a hitch.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: frogprince
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 01:08 PM

The biggest audience reaction to a blooper that I've ever seen wasn't for a singer. A young married woman was giving a presentation for a household disinfectant, at a direct marketing seminar. There was a lag of a couple of seconds before everyone really processed the fact that she had just extolled the ability of the product to "kill all kinds of orgasms"; then the roof blew off. She spent some time with her face buried in her arms on the podium before she emerged red-faced to struggle on.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Richard Bridge
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 01:08 PM

100

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 01:36 PM

I was singing "Cuando Calienta El Sol" at a senior center gig a couple years ago when I inadvertently changed the phrase "m'estramezco"* to "m'escremento."

At the time I wasn't sure that was an actual Spanish word, but it came out close enough to Latin and English that I was sure some in my audience would perceive it as I did -- that instead of singing "I tremble," I had sung "I crap." Anyway, as I started to giggle, my singing partner joined in laughing, which made it harder for me to stop.

It actually isn't a real word in Spanish, but it's pretty close.

I've several times done a similar thing with "O Tannenbaum," when the words "... auch im Winter venn es schneit ..." ("also in winter when it snows") come out as "... auch im Winter venn es scheit."   Actually, "when it shits" in German would be "venn es scheisst," but again it's close enough for that little slip of the tongue to be embarrassing.



*I think that's how you spell it

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mark Ross
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 02:46 PM

Utah Phillips used to do a bit where he would tell the audience that his real name was Zipper, but had to change it when he started playing music 'cause he couldn't see in the trade papers, "ZIPPER OPENS IN CHICAGO"(old vaudeville joke, or maybe it was burlesque). Anyway, one night he said that and unbeknownst to him, his fly was open!

Mark Ross

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: George Papavgeris
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 03:13 PM

Which reminds me - two years ago, in a Yorkshire club, I decided to dash into the gents after my second set, while the "parish notices" were being read. Dashed back in time for the encore, and I treated everyone to "Sing to me Angelo" with my zipper down.... I don't think anyone noticed, but I won't forget it...

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Celtaddict
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 03:43 PM

Instead of 'lass' I once sang 'he'd found a brisk and bonny lad to take unto his bed.'

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: meself
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 07:48 PM

Was doing a concert for a college audience a couple of years ago ... introducing 'The Packet Amphatrite', I mentioned that it was about going 'round Cape Horn - which, in case there was a hole in their education, I remarked was the southern tip of Africa. About two seconds later, it occurred to me what I had just said - but it was so stupid that I couldn't believe I'd actually said it, so failed to correct myself. I asked some friends about it after the show; they reluctantly and rather sadly confirmed that I had indeed moved Cape Horn to Africa ...

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Ebbie
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 08:12 PM

Not at a gig but in a large jam that I was recording a friend sang one of his songs, a lovely one. However, at a certain point he stumbled and sang "sweet, friggin fraggin freeze". I couldn't believe my ears - I knew the line was "sweet fragrant breeze".

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Peter Kasin
Date: 18 Jun 08 - 08:13 PM

At a sea song performance last week, at Eugene O'Neill National historic Site, I meant to say "captain," and ended up saying "craptain." I just forged ahead as if nothing was amiss, hoping nobody caught it, but there were a few smiles in the front row!

Chanteyranger

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: pavane
Date: 19 Jun 08 - 07:11 AM

Mrs Pavane has been known to alter the words quite often.

In Black Velevet, she once had them "Rolling in the Aisles" (not crying).

And she was singing "In the mood" (not many people know there are words to it), and sang "Humping" instead of, I think, Hugging.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Acorn4
Date: 19 Jun 08 - 03:27 PM

Then of course there was the gypsy fiddler, who suddenly re-appeared in front of schocked diners with his instrument but wearing no clothes. One of the diners turned to him and said:-

"Actually I said "Can you play "In the Mood"?"

Not a gig blooper this but an ex-flatmate of mine said he was a shepherd in a school Christmas production and the teacher had written this line for him to say:-

"Oh that I, such a humble shepherd , should live to see such a sight as this"

You can guess the rest!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Black belt caterpillar wrestler
Date: 20 Jun 08 - 07:59 AM

When singing West gallery music there are numerous reasons to be careful of your pronunciation. Apart from "his honour roud about" coming out as "he's on a roundabout", there are multiple mentions of "our souls".

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 20 Jun 08 - 04:59 PM

I frequently play for nursing homes and assisted living residences, and a popular song with those folks in the US is "(The Bells Are Ringing) For Me And My Gal." One part of the lyrics goes:
"Everybody's been knowing
To a wedding they're going,
And for weeks they've been sewing,
Every Susie and Sal."

What's been known to come out of my mouth (when I don't quite catch myself in time) is:
"...
And for weeks she's been showing ... "

In fact I've sung that or almost sung that so many times that I'm tempted to go ahead and write the whole "shotgun wedding" parody of the original song (though I kind of doubt I should share it with my senior residential facility audiences.) ; D

G

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Tangledwood
Date: 20 Jun 08 - 05:37 PM

Go for it Genie! From what I've seen in these facilities the residents won't notice but the staff will enjoy the laugh.

Subject: For Me & My Gal (Shotgun wedding version)
From: Genie
Date: 20 Jun 08 - 06:04 PM

Well, it depends on whether it's a memory care unit or an assisted living facility. In the latter, most of the residents are well aware of the lyrics being sung and what they imply. Trouble is, if there's one resident in a group of 30 who will be really offended by a song or lyric, you're better off avoiding it.   (Activity directors have been known to drop a performer from their entertainer list because someone complained.)   
I do think, though, as our retirement home population and the baby boomer generation merge into each other, standards of "propriety" in entertainment are loosening more and more.

Not all that funny, but here's an off-the-cuff stab at it:

The bells are ringing for me and my gal!
Gossips are singing 'bout me & my gal.
Everybody's been knowing
That she's really been glowing
And for weeks she's been showing,
My ladyfriend, Sal.

They're congregating for me and my gal,
With shotgun waiting is her old man Hal.
And soon we
Will have to build ourselves home for three
(At least - or maybe more)
With nursery for me and my gal.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Tangledwood
Date: 20 Jun 08 - 06:25 PM

It would depend on the home, certainly. Nice work :)

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 31 Oct 09 - 03:09 PM

Yesterday being so close to Halloween, I was using "(Ghost) Riders In The Sky" in my set list for nursing homes and retirement communities.
During one rendition of the song, when I got to the last verse, I began to sing:

"As the _____ rode on by him ..., and, in that instant it seemed odd to sing "riders," since the next word was "rode," so I second-guessed myself and the line came out:

"As the horses rode on by him, he heard one call his name:
'If you want to save your soul from Hell, a-ridin' on our range ... "

I guess if there can be ghost riders in the sky, there can be talking horses too, but ...

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Mr Happy
Date: 31 Oct 09 - 04:05 PM

Mr Ed?

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: meself
Date: 31 Oct 09 - 04:06 PM

He was a zebra. Really.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Howard Jones
Date: 01 Nov 09 - 08:55 AM

I used to sing the ballad "William Taylor". This is one of those songs where a young woman enlists in the army to find her true love, only to be discovered when her waistcoat falls open and shows her womanly charms. This is followed by the words:

"Then the sergeant stepped up to her
Asking what had brought her here"

Later, after she's discovered her true love with another woman and shot and killed them both, comes:

"Then the captain stepped up to her
Pleased well at what she'd done"

So of course, one night I sang, straight after she'd exposed her lily-white breast,

"Then the sergeant stepped up to her
Pleased well at what she'd done"

I'm sure he was, too.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,Ralphie
Date: 02 Nov 09 - 01:29 AM

Peter Sellers used to tell the story when he was playing Drums in a piano parlour duo in a hotel restaurant.
A well heeled Gent asked if they could play a psrticular song so that he could dance with his partner (it being their favourite).
"Of course. Which one?"
"Thats what you are".
Well the duo searched all their song books and couldn't find it, and apologetically told the customer.
"But it's famous, everybody knows it" came the reply.
"Could you sing us a bit to give us a clue?"
The chap duly obliged
"Unforgettable......That's what you are!!"

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: mandotim
Date: 02 Nov 09 - 03:27 AM

Larry Kearns of the Oldham Tinkers used to sing a song that started 'Come all you sons of toil'. Often came out as 'Come all you tons of soil'. My personal favourite is what is known in the local session as 'the Smoked Horse Song', aka Star of the County Down. The original line is 'No horse I'll rope, no pipe I'll smoke'. I'll leave it at that...

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Nick
Date: 02 Nov 09 - 03:57 AM

A line from Rosemary's Sister sometimes comes out as
"And when at last the darkness shits"

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: BobKnight
Date: 02 Nov 09 - 04:53 AM

As well as my "folky" side, I play in a band. One of the songs my brother sings, is Vince Gill's "Whenever You Come Around." Every time he sings the line "I'm standing here holding the biggest heartache in town, whenever you come around." I can't help but change it mentally to something entirely rude.

"I'm standing here holding the biggest hard** in town,
whenever you come around."

Likewise a few years back, we were doing an old Statler Brothers song where the lyrics went:

"But for too long you've kept it in,
And it burns a hole down deep inside."

At which point I made a very loud farting noise. He virtually collapsed across his drum kit with laughter. End of song, and he never sang it again.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Vic Smith
Date: 02 Nov 09 - 09:12 AM

The worst mistake I can remember making was when I was calling a dance - not singing, though I have cocked up words singing songs in my time.

I was instructing the dance The Cumberland Square Eight which, if you know the dance, has dance movements for the "Top & Bottom couples" which are then repeated by the "Side couples". I was getting on fine until I somehow managed to say "Now, back to the Top and Bollocks couples." which brought a stunned silence from the dancers but noisy hilarious laughter from the band.

Ben Paley, our fiddler, was so amused by this that he immediately texted a friend of his who he knew was also playing for a dance that evening...... He got a swift reply saying, "You think you've got problems - I'm sitting playing between..... and here he named two female musicians that it might be best not to name here ".....and they are both pissed out of their heads!"

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 16 Nov 09 - 03:59 PM

mandotim, that "ye tons of soil" blooper was one of the ones that made the Rev. Spooner (in)famous - and gave rise to the term "spoonerism."

Now, yesterday I finally did one that's been threatening to come out for years. Actually (thank goodness), I wasn't doing a gig - though I was singing into a mic on the platform in church - but it was in a congregational hymn. We were singing "All Hail The Power Of Jesus' Name," and the rest of that first line goes,
"Let angels prostrate fall."
I can't sing that line without imagining the blooper or parody line
"Let Angel's prostate fall."
And it seems yesterday I tried so hard NOT to sing it that way, that that is exactly the way it came out of my mouth!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,David Coffin
Date: 16 Nov 09 - 06:37 PM

My daughter, 4 at the time, thought I recorded: "And we'll catch tiny fish for the pan".

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Genie
Date: 21 Dec 09 - 07:15 PM

Well, Ely, that's kind of akin to my accidentally singing "How's about keepin' something up for me" instead of the actual lyric to Hank Williams's "Hey, Good Lookin'"   
It was at a memory care unit of a nursing home (maybe they thought I should be a resident?), and I'm not sure anyone noticed but me. (Let's hope not.)

Now, just last week I did a popular Hanukkah song and I THOUGHT I had caught myself before mixing up a lyric that goes:
"O Hanukkah, o hanukkah, come light the menorah.
Let's have a party, we'll all dance the hora."

But when I played back my video of the gig, sure enough, in one of the three times I sang those lines, it came out:
"O Hanukkah, o hanukkah, come dance the menorah!"

Oy!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 05:19 AM

Flash company my boys, like a great many more, If it hadn't been for flash company I'd never have been so sore!

Or the one I've managed to avoid so far but am convinced will find its way out one day; She sits on my countenance and smiles at my knees (Kind Friends and Companions)

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 07:35 AM

At the start of little pot stove " where the winter wizards blow" . A habit hard to get out of.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Vic Smith
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 07:49 AM

Calling a dance that I've called hundreds of times. "The Cumberland Square Eight" - it might not have mattered so much if it hadn't been the wedding of one of my daughter's classmates -

You know the set up - the top & bottom couples do something and then the side couples copy it. Fine; except that when I started to teach the dance these words came out.....
OK then, first the top and bollocks couples....
I sort of recovered hoping nobody had heard the slip, taught the dance as quickly as I could and then turned round to the band for them to play the introduction..... They were still all doubled up with laughter and couldn't start - the swines!

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,Jon Heslop
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 09:12 AM

At a recent gathering in Wales a well known contributer to this forum was singing one of those "broken token" songs. The line should have been, "your lover was my comrade" - he got as far as,"your comrade was....." before realisation dawned and the room dissolved into hysterics.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Bill D
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 10:38 AM

I have a recording someone did of a live concert of Eric Bogle & John Munro singing this interesting version of "NOBODY'S MOGGY NOW" after a very funny intro: (Eric did the verses all by himself)


"Somebody's moggy by the side of the road
Somebody's pussy who forgot his highway code
Someone's favourite feline who ran clean out of luck
When he ran onto the road and tried to argue with a truck

Yesterday he burled and played in his pussy paradise
Decapitating tweety birds and masturbating ..masticating! mice" *loud giggles from audience*
"...masticating mice.."

etc....(he got the rest right)

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 01:15 PM

Not a song ,but I remember a teacher colleague of mine trying to say "stop fussing and mucking about".. What came out was "stop musing and f***ing about.it was met with shocked silence.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: JennieG
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 06:51 PM

Bill, Eric has been singing this variation since.....well, forever! Probably since the first time he recorded the song, perhaps - and he also does it live.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: GUEST,Gerry
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 07:50 PM

There's a Dorothy Hewett poem, Sailor Home From The Sea, set to music by Chris Kempster, very popular in the Australian folk clubs & festivals, starts out, O cock of the morning/With a dream in his hand, and you have to remember not to start, O dream of the morning, instead.

I once started singing a set of lyrics to the tune of a different song, realized what I was doing, but couldn't for the life of me remember how the correct tune went, so I sang the whole song through to the wrong tune.

I think it may have been Queen Elinor's Confession, to the tune of An Irish Song (by Ed McCurdy). Or maybe it was the other way around.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: Bill D
Date: 03 Dec 13 - 09:01 PM

well, Jenny, I also have a copy of it done 'straight' as a commercial recording. It kinda bothers me to think he would use that 'trick' on a regular basis-- his lyrics are interesting enough in the original.

Subject: RE: Gig bloopers - did I sing that???
From: JennieG
Date: 04 Dec 13 - 12:06 AM

Bill, perhaps that's the difference; the recording I have is with a live audience, so Eric must have been playing to the crowd - the same in the performance I saw. With a commercial studio recording there's probably not the same incentive to spark up an audience by being a little naughty.