BS: Great phrases you know and use.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Peace
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 01:51 AM

That benevolent old asylum for the helpless: said by M Twain about the American Congress.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: JohnInKansas
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 01:47 AM

I believe it was Voltaire:

"To succeed in politics, it is not sufficient that you be ignorant. You must also be polite."

John

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: kindaloupehackenweez
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 01:31 AM

Brucie Cat:Sucking rocks comes from the old days of crossing the dessert. Rocks would hold moisture and probly save some men from total dehydration.
FYI. Stay free and be happy. Kindaloupehackenweez..PEACE..
P.S. Brucie Love this thread was just telling Rustic Rebel Last friday night i was thinking of starting a thread..And calling it Requoteable Quotes.,And Low and Behold it was there already, Farm out

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Peace
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 01:30 AM

Adrianne.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Ebbie
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 01:11 AM

'You can't get there from here. It's an old one, I know, but I've been known to use it.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Peace
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 12:48 AM

Suck rocks. (I like that one.)

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Peace
Date: 13 Dec 04 - 12:38 AM

Think you used enough dynamite there, Butch?

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: kindaloupehackenweez
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 10:16 PM

Hell no, I aint no cultavator, i'm a prespaterian.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Bill D
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 09:59 PM

"You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think"

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day...teach a man to fish and he'll sit in a boat all day drinking beer."

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 09:45 PM

If you don't chew your food, who will?

Where there's smoke, there's dinner!!!

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't rip his lips off.

paused like a woodpecker at timberline.

I keep a rabbi's foot in my pocket for luck.



Art Thieme

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: catspaw49
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 07:58 PM

I've asked this on previous threads like this one but here it is again.............

A friend of mine was arguing about something with his Dad when we were maybe 25 or so. His Dad finally ends the argument by saying:
"Jesus Christ Dan, you act like a man with a rubber asshole."

We had no idea what that meant then and I still don't.....but I love the phrase.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: LilyFestre
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 07:46 PM

Lately....

Kwitcherbellyakin!

F*ck it, I give up.

Michelle

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: kindaloupehackenweez
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 07:32 PM

Just one more for now:

       Opinions are like assholes, Everybody has one. AGAIN UNKNOWN
   Kindaloupehackenweez...Peace.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: kindaloupehackenweez
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 07:29 PM

1). If you give a man a fish you feed him for a day.
    If you teach a man to fish you feed him for a life time. UNKNOWN

2). God made some people big and God made some people small but
    Samuel Colt made them all equal. UNKNOWN

3). Tighter than a bulls ass in fly season. UNKNOWN

4). Worthless as the tits on a bore. UNKNOWN

5). Dryer than a popcorn fart. My Cousin.

6). Thous with nothing to hide, Hide nothing. UNKNOWN

7). Your Breath is so bad it could knock a buzzard off a shit wagon
    UNKNOWN

8). If you cant be with the one you love, love the one your with.
    Crosby, Stills, and Nash.

9). There is no truimp without loss. UNKOWN

10). All good things come in time, Great things happen all at once.
    UNKNOWN

11). Fears keeps you from seeing beauty and purpose. UNKNOWN

12). Sometimes its good to remember, sometimes its good to forget
      and move on. UNKNOWN

      Stay free and be happy and make sure the world is good to you
      and yours. KINDALOUPEHACKENWEEZ... PEACE.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Rapparee
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 07:17 PM

There ain't no THERE there.

If I don't care about the staff, who will?

I can't promise that anyone else will (give blood, etc.).

Okay, go ahead and do it and ask me if you have questions or problems.
(To staff members at work)

A hunnert million bucks, Lord! That's all I ask, just a lousy hunnert
million, and I could tell all these politicians to go piss up a rope. (about the library budget)

So, why (aren't)(don't) we?

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: number 6
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 06:18 PM

"I played the wrong, wrong notes"   -   Thelonius Monk


Thanks for starting this thread Brucie!

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Once Famous
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 06:02 PM

One of my favorites is a phrase that I really don't use too oftern here. But I am fond of telling someone that I don't agree with that they talk like they have a paper asshole.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: kindaloupehackenweez
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 06:00 PM

Why Worry:

There are only two things in life to worry about.
Weather you are well or you are sick.
If your well theres nothing to worry about.
But if your sick there are two things to worry about.
Weather you get better or if you get worse.
If you get better theres nothing to worry about.
But if you get worse there are only two things to worry about.
weather you are going to live or weather you are going to die.
If you live there is nothing to worry about.
But if you die there are two things to worry about.
Weather you go to heavan or weather you go to hell.
If you go to heavan there is nothing to worry about.
But if you go to hell, You'll be so busy shaking hands with old friends you wont have time to worry.

Again dont know who wrote these words of wit but would like to and to make a correction on the source of the seven deadly sins. It was a Sunday Morning program by Charles OSGOOD, NOT Charles Corralt. I apoligize..   I wouldnt be a nothing, my head all full of stuffing if i only had a brain..The Scarecrow. The wizard of oz.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: kindaloupehackenweez
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 04:29 PM

The Seven Deadly Sins

    In the struggle primeevil between good and evil.
    Between Hell and Heavan at least seems number seven.
    Until this very day still lead us astray.
    But avoid them we must. Pride, Envy, Glotty, and lust,
    Anger, Averiance, and Sloth.
    As the flame draw the moth to the candle lite flume.
    By the seven deadly Sins we are drawn to our doom.
   
I wish i Knew who wrote these words of wit. But copied them from a recording of a Sunday Morning tv show with Charles Corrallt,(SBTS)

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 04:28 PM

At the risk of being "me too"--Bill D., how right you are!

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Bill D
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 03:32 PM

"Herding cats is easier than stopping thread drift on Mudcat"

...me, 2 minutes ago

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Metchosin
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 03:15 PM

Where there's folk there's mire

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: harpgirl
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 03:06 PM

from my dad when I was a kid...."No yabuts!"

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: LilyFestre
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 02:55 PM

Sometimes you eat the bear, sometimes the bear eats you.

I'd rather be pissed off than pissed on.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: fat B****rd
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 02:42 PM

Lawd, I done died and gone to Heaven

Must be jelly 'cos jam don't shake like that

Good Bourbon, tight pussy and a warm place to shit

Pretentious !! Moi ??

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: chris nightbird childs
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 02:05 PM

Keep wailin'

Let yr spirit burn, and they'll still smell the smoke when yr gone

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Midchuck
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 01:56 PM

Uglier than Death takin' a shit.

Crazier than a shithouse rat.

That woman was so tall she could stand flat-footed and piss in the radiator of a Chevy pickup. (from H. Allen Smith, R. I. P. - you have to be old enough to remember cars and trucks with radiator caps on the outside of the hoods to understand it)

Infinite metaphors for mental defect and/or derangement:

Two cans shy of a six-pack...

Dumber than a sackfull of hammers...

P.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: *Laura*
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 01:10 PM

Come the f*ck on (Bridget) (insert name)

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Ebbie
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 12:22 PM

'A little pain never hurt anybody.'

In an argument: 'I've already said more than I know.'

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 12:20 PM

Absolutely nothing is foolproof. Fools are too ingenious.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: GUEST,Vic at work
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 12:16 PM

From a collection that appeared in The Spectator (I think)

An owl in a sack troubles no man. - this is my all time favourite catchall, meaningless response.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 11:08 AM

The more things change, the more they get different---me

The older I get, the better I was.----me

Rosebud----Kane (whenever valued things are lost)


(art thieme)

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Sttaw Legend
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 10:26 AM

About as much use as tits on fish.

About as much use as a chocolate fireguard.

About as much use as a hole in the head.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 10:14 AM

"I need ________ about as much as a pig needs a bra."

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Peace
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 10:11 AM

You guys and gals have a gang of keepers. Thank you.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 09:43 AM

I don't believe in psychiatry. Anyone who would go to a psychiatrist should have his head examined.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Megan L
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 09:17 AM

Usually said to motorists "were you born that daft or did you practice"

If yer brains were nitro you widny hae tae fly a red flag

Tak care guid fowk are hard tae find

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: kendall
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 09:02 AM

Don't give advice. The wise don't need it and the fool won't heed it.

Money can't buy happiness, but if you have enough of it, you get to choose the kind of misery that suits you best.

Don't deride someone else's religion; it's no sillier than your own.

What goes around, comes around.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: GUEST,Toenails John
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 08:38 AM

On the 7th day god made woman, since then, NOBODY'S rested.

As usefull as tits on a bull

Live a dogs life, if you cant eat it or screw it, piss on it

You're as ignorant as the back of my b***s

Me stones are like 2 feet (indicating coldness, i assume we can figure out what stones are???)

Do farts have lumps?

He has the kind of face only a mother could love

If assholes could fly, this folk club would be an airport

Some mornings i wake up cold & miserable, other mornings i let her sleep

Never turn your back on a woman in bed unless you want 2 cold feet put on it.

And finally the best bit of advice i was ever given by my Gran-Uncle
"If a woman leaves her knickers on the bedroom floor more than 2 nights in a row, forget about her!"

I may think of some more, but these spring straight to mind

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Sttaw Legend
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 06:35 AM

Used tombstone for sale perfect for someone named Homer Hendel Bergen Heinzel. One only

Man wanted to work in dynamite factory must be willing to travel

Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. 45 volumes. Excellent condition. £100 or best offer. No longer needed. Got married last weekend. Wife knows f**king everything.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: kendall
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 05:41 AM

I'm not the man I used to think I was. (Mine, I think)

Ugly: She looked like she fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.

So ugly the tide wouldn't take her out.

I've never learned anything talking to someone I agree with. (Mine)

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: fat B****rd
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 03:24 AM

Hi, Brucie. How are ya ?? I once read on a lavatory wall that "The secret of a happy life is not to do what you like but to like what you do"

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: GUEST,Clareling
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 02:51 AM

Accept that somedays you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue. - Roger C. Anderson

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: kindaloupehackenweez
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 01:40 AM

Heres afew more:

Oh and Freda i'll Try to referance them. The ones not referanced were either unknown or i heard them on the t.v. or made them up myself

Adversity doesnt build charactor it reveals it. Unknown.

Dont let your alligator mouth override your hummingbird ass. Unknown

I wish i knew then what i know now. TV commerical

Folks are about as happy as they make up there minds to be. Abraham Licholn (sbts)= (sorry bout the spelling)

Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom. "Thomas Jefferson"

All of the flowers of all the tomorrows are in the seed of today. Unknown

I dont know, I think i might, but i'm not sure. "Kindaloupehackenweez

Nice guys finish last. Archy Bunker. (All in the family)

A Dream is a question we havent yet learned to ask. The X files

Its better to die standing on my feet, Than to continue living on my knees. General Emiliano Zapata.

Enjoy kindaloupehackenweez/ Loco inlaw cabessa PEACE...

P.S. Why do they call it a roach clip?   
                     Because "Pot holders" was already taken.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 12:18 AM

"Death is natures way of getting your family off your back."

"Less talk and more synthahol!!!!!!!" --- (Lt. Warf)

"Same old rules. No eyes. No Groin"

"Cold enough to freeze an egg on the sidewalk!"

"A normal person wouldn't steal pituitaries!"

"It's not the heat. It's the humanity!"

"Never buy fresh fish from a car with Oklahoma plates!"

"One good turn gets most of the blanket!"

"It's colder than a teacher's wit!!"



(Art Thieme again)

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: LilyFestre
Date: 12 Dec 04 - 12:08 AM

I'll hit you so hard your kids will be born dizzy!

She was on that like white on rice!

Oh...there are so many more that elude me at the moment.............

Michelle

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: harpgirl
Date: 11 Dec 04 - 11:58 PM

Now...It's not worth buying the entire pig just to get a little sausage...

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: GUEST,Art Thieme
Date: 11 Dec 04 - 11:48 PM

"Good though!"

"Another lock delay!"

"Onward and upward!"

"Pigs ate my roses!"

(art thieme)

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: Sorcha
Date: 11 Dec 04 - 10:03 PM

Never doubt your wife's judgement, look who she married
Dumber than a box of rocks
It's a long way from your heart (about an owie)
No blood, no owie.

Subject: RE: BS: Great phrases you know and use.
From: GUEST,Chongo Chimp
Date: 11 Dec 04 - 09:16 PM

I am gonna use that one sometime, Cluin. Thanks! I think it works better if you put the word "just" before "fart".