BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front

Subject: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 05:57 AM

On trawling through other message boards, i have stumbled across a new power rising in the east.

These people are the anti-penguin army, and their sole mission is to destroy all penguins.
We cannot let this happen, we need to combine numbers and disperse of this terrible new threat to civilisation.
They are led by King Bob and his plans have gone further than i thought possible.

The PLF needs YOU, we are on a recruiting spree.
The penguins must be saved.

This army were once our allies in the "Death to the anti-shatner" war, but we must now move on and break the union. No more shall the penguins be exploited and attacked motivelessly.
we cannot allow this to go on.

We are the PLF and we need all the help we can get. Join now. Think of the penguins

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: mack/misophist
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 08:48 AM

I am a penguin and I fear no army.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 09:10 AM

Penguins are also welcome to fight this threat to their lives, good to have you aboard

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 09:24 AM

Together we are stronger. Free fish for all who join us in our chilly endeavours.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 09:29 AM

I suggest they contact the Garden Gnome Liberation Front.

On the other hand I have heard that Penguins are involved in the southern hemisphere branch of the Manatee Conspiracy in which case I fear I cannot support them.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: catspaw49
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 09:31 AM

YO!! PENGUINS!!

FEAR THIS!!!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 09:39 AM

470.4!

hey 'spaw! any idea if that is feet, yards, meters?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 09:43 AM

482.1 and it flaming hurt.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 10:05 AM

No one said you had to jump! YOu could have used the stairs on the back of the pinnacle and avoided the yeti.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Bryant
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 11:08 AM

Now if we can only get some yetis involved, we'll have sorted out the airforce.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Martin Ryan
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 11:12 AM

I thought all you guys fell over a few years ago?

Regards

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bill D
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 11:49 AM

491.7!! ya gotta allow for the wind!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 12:23 PM

Personal best of 512.8m... that game is SO much fun!

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 12:37 PM

Meanwhile, the ice is melting, which is a real bugger...

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Bryant
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 12:37 PM

587.6 - that was one that skated along the ice - I can't get over 500 with the ones which come down head first.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Les from Hull
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 02:04 PM

I've always loved those Penguin Folk Songs.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Sttaw Legend
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 02:26 PM

I think the problem started when they put them in different coloured wrappers - deciding which to eat first - red, green, yellow - decisions decisions !!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 03:14 PM

The PLF have moved forward since our last communication.
A new leader has taken command, King Bob, and is fearless and ruthless.
We cannot let him and his dastardly army progress any further with this losing battle against penguins.

As a side note, i am not referring to the chocolate biscuits, this army is sworn to take over REAL penguins.
However, all new recruits WILL be issued a penguin biscuit bar as standard and choice of colour wrapper.

Now then, for further reading you MUST click the following link. You will see that King Bob is amassing an army, this is the birthplace of the Penguin Extinction Army. I urge you to voice your views on this matter in the thread. Never will the PLF stand down, we will stop this worldwide threat to penguins before Bob amasses the largest army the world has ever seen.
Here is the link

Please note a possible co-leader of the PLF in King Grub, who is as you will see in the picture, a real penguin. He is our best ally at present, and we must help him in any way we can.

King Bob thinks he is evil and invincible but if we stick together we can amass an army larger than he could ever imagine.

Please also note the presence of SPN200286, a pillock who is high up in rank in this army. maybe we can assassinate him first.

Good luck and i urge you all to post, if not read on this thread.

Thank you and god speed

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,KING BOB
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 03:22 PM

We have no quarel with penguins, but our intelagence says they are plotting to take over the world!
we cannot allow this to happen.
we will not hurt any penguins that surrender, but i warn you any invasion of any sort will result in the kicking in of S6K

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 03:26 PM

INTRUDER IN THE FORUM.
The penguins will never surrender to you, there is no need for us to surrender, we want liberation and freedom of penguins, not slavery and surrender. Go and never darken our thread again.
You are the leader of an organisation we must destroy. you must die

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Kerchak
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 03:37 PM

586.1!!! Only Dave Bryant has beat that one! I like this game!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,KING BOB
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 03:41 PM

WILL NOT INSLAVE THE PENGUINS WE WILL TAKE THEM TO PLUTO TO HAVE A PLANET OF THERE OWN, THEY CAN EVEN STAY ON EARTH IF THEY DONT TAKE IT OVER!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 03:44 PM

I can assure you that there is no plan to take over.

Rest assured if you make the first move, you WILL regret it.

Mudcat is bigger and has more members than your forum! do not do anything to jeapordize your life and the lives of your men

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 03:52 PM

But we all know Size doesn't Matter!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Sttaw Legend
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 04:32 PM

Quote 'all new recruits WILL be issued a penguin biscuit bar as standard and choice of colour wrapper' I think this in very poor taste, in the army you don't get a choice. Suggestion: make all wrappers black.

Guest, apparently size does matter - ask harpmaker.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bill D
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 06:23 PM

tsk..544.7 is the best I've been able to do...got one at 515 sliding..

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 06:27 PM

Noted, all wrappers will be black. please also be vigilant of appearances from Bob, and sneak attacks by their camp. we dont want to get caught unaware

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 06:35 PM

How about a paperback ration?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Little Hawk
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 06:59 PM

Go to Google, folks, and look up "Penguin Lust". You won't believe it!

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 07:05 PM

It was a damn good orgy. You don't know what you are missing. Go on dress up, just for the weekend.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bo Vandenberg
Date: 03 Feb 04 - 09:52 PM

There is only one Lord of the Desktop, and he does not share power!

Ask oh so many....

You all must take your little silver disks and throw them into mount doom.

Then download a free alternative :)

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: LadyJean
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 01:08 AM

I presume it is the emperor penguins who are planning to rule the world.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bo Vandenberg
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 01:21 AM

I Personally Emulate the Jackass Penguin.

If you're gonna be a jackass at least be cute about it. Thats really a world changing idea. I mean look at napoleon!



Ready To Leap Into Action

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 03:07 AM

Er..... check that they aren't nuns first! Clue is in the beak and feet. Nuns have pink beaks and tend not to hatch eggs on their feet.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Sttaw Legend
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 07:35 AM

Does Batman know about the PLF - their may be a conflict of interests ?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: JennyO
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 10:32 AM

586.4! Only have Dave Bryant to beat! Like he said, the ones that skate and bounce a few times do the best. Wot fun!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,MMario
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 11:05 AM

I've never seen a skating penguin....

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: jeffp
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 01:23 PM

Be careful! Some penguins just can't be trusted. Check this.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bo Vandenberg
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 03:46 PM

Jeffp



You made my day.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: catspaw49
Date: 04 Feb 04 - 04:58 PM

Should have posted this before....My best is a 595.5 with slide and 505 on the fly. I also have about a zillion strikes!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Little Hawk
Date: 05 Feb 04 - 12:24 AM

AWRIGHT!!! 588.3! Only Spaw has beaten that.

- LH

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Metchosin
Date: 05 Feb 04 - 02:31 AM

Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyha nyah.....I just got 593 on a slider.....I'm gunnin' for the record....another 26 hours and I might make it......I wonder why my clothes smell so bad?....oh never mind, the dog farted.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 05 Feb 04 - 10:12 AM

The Penguin Extinction Army stopped for a break yesterday to eat cheese, and they now claim that penguins attacked them from behind and used the situation to their advantage.
I think this is a dirty lie, and they are trying to cause trouble... If i find out this is true, we are going to war my friends

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: catspaw49
Date: 05 Feb 04 - 10:17 AM

DAMN!!! I keep going for the big 600 and I'm getting WORSE instead of better..........gotta' keep trying here though!!!

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bill D
Date: 05 Feb 04 - 12:23 PM

Babe Ruth and Mickey Mantle are the only players whose bats have launched suspected 600+...good luck! (I am still at 544, but that was in th air..(no slide!)

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bill D
Date: 05 Feb 04 - 09:50 PM

well! I now have a 576.8 AND a 595!...neither one sliding...(I can't seen to combine distance with sliding)

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 08 Feb 04 - 06:08 AM

Death to the anti-penguin and the anti-shatner

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: JennyO
Date: 08 Feb 04 - 08:15 AM

Seen in a newsletter from the Merry Muse (a folk club in Canberra), written by its owner, Bill Arnett, a big fella who sometimes dresses up as a fairy, comes this little snippet:

"...the current record that I know about for penguin appreciation (yes folks he enjoys it) is 588.8 metres by Martin Pearson. Martin adds "AND the penguin lived"...
Let me know if you've done better .... NO fibbing, god can see you.........."

Ah yes, but can we believe him?

Anyway, 588.8 is old news by now. Anyone break the 600 yet?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Feb 04 - 10:44 AM

I am beginning to think the really big scores are like Las Vegas slot machine wins....they are programed to happen only so often. I see the difference between a late swing and and early swing, but it feels like the same angle that gets 350 one time will get 500 the next...and there are no 'power' controls..

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 04:21 AM

All has been quiet lately. i do not trust the P.E.A.
be on your guard at all times and god speed to you all

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 08:41 AM

I didn't attack him from behind. I crept up stealthily and then tripped over a box of Dairylea that some nutter had left lying around.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 09:23 AM

Its a sad state of affairs when you cant walk to the shops without falling over clumsily left over dairyleas, which in turn make you fall into someone else.

Lets also merge the PLF into the PLRDF, the Penguin Liberation and Removal of Dairylea Front

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 09:39 AM

Ok but the t.shirts will cost more to print.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 09:41 AM

Not a problem. i am hatching a secret plan and have a collection box going on the MY NEW GUITAR thread, they think i need the money for a new amplifier for my guitar, but NO! we will use this for the tshirt fund.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 09:48 AM

Aha I see I am dealing with an astute brain. So that's £1000 quid so far. I reckon Bobjack will be a hardnut to crack. I applaud your cunning. Where were you when my mates the seals were being clubbed?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Sttaw Legend
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 10:10 AM

"Bobjack will be a hardnut to crack" easily solved - purchase a mountain bi-cycle or flamenco style guitary thingy (thats the one with plastic strings)and bribe, sorry I mean offer him one (I'll have what he doesn't want, for the idea - cheap at half the price)

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bobjack
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 10:19 AM

Seals? yum yum! gas mark 6, 20minutes a pound.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 12:06 PM

That joke was used on a thread about horses!!! thats like soooo totally like not original!

When the seals were being clubbed.... well, i come from a different planet to Earth and i have only recently arrived here. so, i apologize i couldnt help before.

One of the things that fascinate me most about your planet is the "Cig Mates"... if you dont know what these creatures are, refer to my thread entitled 'ULL
they truly are a unique specimen.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bobjack
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 12:09 PM

Penguins? Yum, yum. Gas mark 6, 20 minutes a pound.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 09 Feb 04 - 12:28 PM

Bobjack I have a fantastic bargain for you. Sttaw Legend told me you needed one. Hurry though, I have a feeling it won't last long.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bobjack
Date: 10 Feb 04 - 04:03 AM

What are you talking about Dave? You are a strange little man!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Rustic Rebel
Date: 10 Feb 04 - 04:21 AM

I like penguins.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST
Date: 10 Feb 04 - 08:40 AM

stewed, fried or baked?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 10 Feb 04 - 08:46 AM

Rustic Rebel we like you too. Please join up. Tshirts coming along nicely so long as it doesn't get too warm.
Anybody want a REALLY cold flamenco style guitar thingy?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 10 Feb 04 - 10:14 AM

quack!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: King Bob
Date: 10 Feb 04 - 10:21 AM

KING BOB IS HERE ALL FEAR, COWER AND HIDE YOUR SAD UGLY FACES!
I SAY AGAIN WE WILL ONLY KILL PENGUINS THAT ATTACK US,


BUT......


WE ARE SLOWLY ADVANCING AND WE WILL WIN







THE P.E.A WILL PREVAIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!














AND LETS EAT SOME SEALS!!!



HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 10 Feb 04 - 10:30 AM

geek

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,leeneia
Date: 10 Feb 04 - 11:33 PM

I cannot fathom a campaign against the noble birds who published the Penguin Book of Ballads.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 09:18 AM

Is the Penguin Liberation Front(PLF) the same as the Front for the Liberation of Penguins(FLP)? Also which interpenguinal do the owe their loyalty to.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 09:22 AM

the front for the liberation of penguins are an army from america, the PLF are the english branch of this great empire

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 09:33 AM

Are they the (PLF) entryist? Just 'cos the FLP are american does not indicate that they do nor have the correct position.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 09:49 AM

Why do all you penguins sing in English [English Book Of Penguin Folksongs ] You don't come from here so get your own language.
And why do you penguins taste like fish? when you are birds. Or are you?
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Trotting Tony
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 09:52 AM

Hey Pal what do you mean entry-ist. There is naff-all wrong with that. I've been a supporter of the penguinist tendancy for years now! I was selling their flippers outside seal meetings and lobbying the whaling front for seasons until that bastard Knikkock outed us at a crill party in Brighton. Lilly-livered stalinist hope he bumps into a killer whale near a dark ice-flo!
UP THE REVOLUTION THE ONLY GOOD EMPERORS ARE PENGUINS!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 09:57 AM

What I always thought the Penguinist Tendancy was revisionist! They should be supporting worker penguins instead they they go doffing their chin straps to the upper classes!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 10:44 AM

Why do you all look like waiters?
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 10:55 AM

It saves us having to get changed for our evening jobs.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 12:43 PM

plus its our undercover uniform, we are in reality a totally different colour, but shhh

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Polar bear
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 05:37 PM

Why are you people talking about cooking them - they taste better raw - and they make a change from seals. We shouldn't even talk about Neil King Penguin in a sensible thread like this - look at the way he dealt with Arthur Star Krill.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Marrowfat
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 05:42 PM

PLF!! don't make me laugh. We of the PFLP (popular front for the liberation of penguins) are already training our birds to hijack albatrosses to attack you puny humans.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Marrowfat
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 05:56 PM

And just wait 'til you see our suicide seagulls.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 06:22 PM

We are not trying to compete with our fellow man, we must band together in these times and join forces. together we are stronger

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 07:23 PM

Polar Bear if you quit your bullying we will make you a really really really really really really really ex large t.shirt.

I think this is going to be easier than we thought. They have no idea we are a delicate shade of fuschia and taste of candyfloss.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Raedwulf
Date: 11 Feb 04 - 09:35 PM

595.5m is the absolute max for a bouncing penguin. 490.5 is the max for a high trajectory penguin. Extensive testing at the IPBP (Institute for Potentially Ballistic Penguins) has proved that they are of little strategic use, although the Top Secret High-Boost program has achieved ranges just short of 3.5km

Nevertheless, funding is being diverted into ICAP (the Inter-Continental Albatross Program). However, the enemy have anticipated us, & the GLFDS (Global Longline Fishery Defense System) has decimated albatross numbers, pre-empting our technology somewhat...

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 06:35 AM

Comelately and flaternal Greetings to Comrade Marrowfat! Was not the PFLP (Popular Front for the Liberation of Penguins) one of the groups that emerged when the Penguin Revolutionary Party Disintegrated when it was disclosed that its 96 (or was it 69)year old (male)leader was discovered to have had 16 year old female penguins spending time in his nest? What was apparantly worse was the the young cadres had been nicking the best stones from the other worker penguins' nests and bringing them to their leader for his now notorious purposes! Perhaps someone can shed some further light on this as I believe that there were several cells that then emerged and called for a new 5th interpenguinal. Was one called the Interpenguinal Crill Party (ICP)?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 07:50 AM

I've heard a rumour that they are being trained by the CIA along with the dolphins.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ToulouseCruise
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 08:48 AM

okay... I believe this is discriminatory.... not all penguins want liberation, let alone are liberal. Some are rather conservative, a few being anarchistic as well.... and what about those penguins who aren't in front, are you prejudiced against those who may not quite be as fast and are lagging in back?

and I thought this was a fair forum... at least an occasionally okie-dokie forum, at least...

Long Live the Conservatory of Penguin Backs!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 08:51 AM

I heard that that was malicous gossip spread by malevolent members of another penguin organisation called Penguinist Voice (PV). They were based in Manchester, mainly in the academic bits in that city and had applied for a Government Grant to stop the exploitation of sister penguins in the Guano factories on South Georgia. They (PV) were turned down because M.I.6 believed that they had supported Argentinian Emporer Penguins when they attemted to sieze those islands in 1982.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Marrowfat
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 09:51 AM

ced2

not only that but we had problems with the SWP (Socialist Worker Penguins) trying to hijack our demos. The WRP (Workers Revolutionary Penguins) were almost as bad. Now we like to think that these days are in the past and we have matured as an organisation. We have almost settled our differences with the polar bears but they will have to take down the wall and recognise our territorial integrity.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 09:53 AM

Given that for the most part Polar bears are ARCTIC and penguins ANTARTIC this shouldn't be hard.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Bill D
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 10:49 AM

piffle, Raedwulf! I have a number over 500 in-the-air nose-first! 4 of my 5 highest scores were NOT sliding/bouncing.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Marrowfat
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 10:52 AM

That is why our negotiations have taken so long. (Are you really pedant under another guise and are taking this thread seriously - have a glass of wine and loosen up.)

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 11:11 AM

I am interested to hear that the WRP (Workers Revolutionary Penguins)have ceased to give you trouble, you may be able to avoid a future slaughtering! However do not lower your flipper; it is reputed that the ICP (Interpenguinal Crill Party) will call for the flippers and bills of those who they regard as being traitors in the vanguard of the penguinist struggle!! As for the Socialist Workers Penguins; the less said the better though I do understand that they too have little upsets when they drive off those penguins who have sold out to the ruling Emperors. I actually knew 3 chinstraps who were so flippered, they flapped about for years afterwards getting excessively excitable at anything swimming past.
Incidentally have you experienced trouble with a rare breed, generally leaning sycophantically to the right known as Joe's Kremlin Shufflers?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Bertie the Bolshie
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 12:01 PM

Its the Gulag for you ced2!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Greater Auks Against Penguins
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 12:11 PM

GAAP calls for ALL Auks to rise and expel these Antipodiean Penguins from our territorial waters! Just because convergent evolution has made them capable of filling our ecological niche does not make it right, moral, or even politically correct!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Marrowfat
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 02:10 PM

I've not had too much trouble with Joe's Kremlin Shufflers but there's a bunch of entryists called New Penguins who've almost hijacked some branches of the movement. They talk about the third way but no one can find it. What else is there to life than fish and krill. But it is more comfortable now that we know how far away the polar bears are.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 04:36 PM

Any penguin is a penguin in need

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 12 Feb 04 - 11:00 PM

ced2, gulag? could be an improvement on Keighley.
Are penguins ' wobblies '
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 13 Feb 04 - 02:06 PM

That could just be so M. Eric Le Rouge, but then again I did think about moving ti Halifax in the early nineties and decided not to! However I remember Joe's Kremlin Shufflers. Those penguins used to sell their paper round our way; if I remember rightly it was called the "Adele Worker".

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Marrowfat
Date: 13 Feb 04 - 02:35 PM

I remember Uncle Joe's Fish Tankies - and his mint balls - kept the old gulags warm.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 05:14 AM

Were there not some Euro-squids as well, infact did they not have a flipper-up about the successor to the Adele Worker the Moaning Star-fish?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 05:36 AM

Stop this NOW it is getting very silly, you are all under arrest.
SSM eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 05:43 AM

You cannot silence us penguins forever. it is better to die on your feet than live on your knees

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 06:30 AM

I thought it was live on your flippers.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 06:36 AM

I heard you cant eat penguins, [there poisunus], wahts the point of an animal that you cant eat!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 08:42 AM

Does anyone remember a group of penguins called something like "The Chinstrap Penguins Brotherhood (Marxist-Leninist). They had a paper called "The Waddler", a sombre sort of thing. They were always polite when they had a gathering. They would stand and very politley address who was ever incubating the most eggs ans squart in measured tones (non of this hecking from the back whilst another 'guin was squarking. They used to regard Albania as their spiritual home and old Penvar as their leader though I believe some of them had a liking for Kim Ill Guin.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: MMario
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 09:27 AM

JOhn - I believe only the liver of penguins are poisonous.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 09:31 AM

The whole of my mother in law is poisonous.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 09:38 AM

So is mine and she's not a even feckin penguin.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 09:40 AM

and sok try telling that to a man with no legs.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 14 Feb 04 - 02:38 PM

i will still be laughing at that tomorrow!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 18 Feb 04 - 06:22 PM

all quiet so far, but as always, stay alert

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Sttaw Legend
Date: 18 Feb 04 - 07:46 PM

Good morning

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 19 Feb 04 - 04:45 AM

I don't eat liver so I guess penguins are OK for me to eat. But they always taste fishy.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 19 Feb 04 - 07:57 AM

you wont be eating ANY penguins

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST
Date: 19 Feb 04 - 08:09 AM

s6k explain.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 19 Feb 04 - 09:42 AM

This is the headquaters of the Penguin Liberation Front.
To come here and say you are going to eat penguins is insane.
You know damn well you daren't even harm a penguin while we are around, we will stop all attempts to harm the penguins.
Nobody escapes us. Be friends with the penguins and you all have nothing to fear

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 19 Feb 04 - 09:49 AM

Thanks MMario, I just been to the butchers to get some penguin, [i never tried it before], but butcher just gave me a weird look, and ask if i was on drugs or summat!
he says they dont sell penguin, nearest think they got is chicken.
i will go to the zoo and shoot one, i wonder is there is any penguins at the fish museum in town?
i will go and see.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST
Date: 19 Feb 04 - 09:50 AM

"Penguins are friends...not food!"

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 19 Feb 04 - 10:01 AM

If I catch another bloody penguin in my garden pond I'll bloodywell show you if I can eat it or not. [ great with chips and Yorkshire pudding ]
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 19 Feb 04 - 11:19 AM

You have been warned. If any one of you try and eat us, we will be forced to utilise our little known secret powers.

We can astrally project. Now you never knew that did you?

You think we are all standing around in a huddle for warmth eh? No, far from it. With our collective mind control we can enter the brains of killer bees.Has is never crossed your feeble minds that our colourings bear striking similarities?

Any more of this foolish talk and a swarm of biblical proportions will descend upon you.We will sting unto death.

BUZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz take heed.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 19 Feb 04 - 01:11 PM

You heard it straight from the king

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 04:33 AM

quck quack!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 05:52 AM

Didn't know you had a gasrden pond Eric... you sure it's not a mill dam?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 06:32 AM

If it was a mill dam my house would be a mill but my house is a house
so it's not a mill dam it's a POND. Very small pond I'll admit but the froggys love it, in fact they are nearly as big a pest as the bleedin penguins.
And any way what's a ' garsden pond '
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: ced2
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 08:25 AM

A garden pond with an "s" in it.... did you enjoy a good egg-rattlin' day yesterday? I thought the only houses in Halifax with ponds were in Skircoat Green'

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 08:47 AM

Yeah, some crap egg playing but some good singing, Kate Canary & Max,
among the rest uf us.
eric

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 23 Feb 04 - 04:39 PM

plase try tio spel corectly

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 24 Feb 04 - 03:30 AM

awlrite then.
reci

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 26 Feb 04 - 09:49 AM

quack!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Peace
Date: 26 Feb 04 - 07:25 PM

The Seven Dwarfs go to the Vatican, and because they are "the seven dwarfs" they get ushered into see the Pope.

Dopey leads the pack.
"Dopey my son," says the Pope, "what can I do for you?"

Dopey asks, "Excuse me, Your Excellency, but are there any dwarf nuns in Rome?"

The Pope wrinkles his brow at the odd question, thinks for a moment and answers, "No Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in Rome."

In the background a few of the dwarfs begin giggling.

Dopey turns around and gives them a glare, silencing them.

Dopey turns back to face the Pope.
"Your Worship, are there any dwarf nuns in all of Europe?"

The Pope, puzzled again, thinks for a moment and then answers, "No Dopey, there are no dwarf nuns in all of Europe."

This time all the other dwarfs burst into laughter.

Once again, Dopey turns around and silences them all with an angry glare.

Dopey turns back to the Pope and says, "Mr. Pope, are there ANY dwarf nuns in the whole world?"

The Pope answers, "I'm sorry, my son, there are no dwarf nuns anywhere in the world."

The other dwarfs collapse into a heap, rolling, and laughing,
pounding on the floor, tears rolling down their cheeks as they begin chanting:















"Dopey screwed a penguin! Dopey screwed a penguin!"

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Pingu
Date: 26 Feb 04 - 07:32 PM

And he never even rang me the next day.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Dave Hanson
Date: 27 Feb 04 - 04:44 AM

Mind you, if the penguin gets pregnant? ? ? ? ? ?

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: Sttaw Legend
Date: 27 Feb 04 - 05:00 AM

Let no man put us NUNDWA.

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: s6k
Date: 01 Mar 04 - 04:30 AM

Arrrrrrgh!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Anti_Penguin Front
Date: 14 Nov 04 - 09:53 PM

PENGUINS ARE EVIL!!!!!!!!!!!! WE WILL DESTROY THEM ALL. WITH CHEESE!!!!!!!!! AND SHEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Subject: RE: BS: PLF: Penguin Liberation Front
From: GUEST,Uncle Penguin Front
Date: 14 Nov 04 - 09:59 PM

The missus is on the jazz. Ignore her.