Lyr Add: Testicles

Subject: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: GUEST,The Ancient Matriarch
Date: 22 Jun 26 - 11:41 AM

Testicles, or The Human Oyster        
Tune: So Selfish Runs the Hare, as recorded by the Albion Band                                

You think you know more than me because you have the testicles
You think that you know me better than I know myself
You think that you know enough to criticize my scholarship
Though my work is cited in the books upon your shelf.

You know you are brilliant because your mother told you so
You know I’m incompetent because I am a girl
Send me all your comments, I’ll put them in my archive
I am a human oyster, every song I write’s a pearl.
        
Thank you for informing me my songs are not uplifting
Thank you for explaining all the things I’m doing wrong
If I’d only listen to your precious words of wisdom
Maybe in a year or two I’d write a decent song.


The Slippery Slope of Silencings

Men explain things to me, and other women, whether or not they know what they’re talking about.
        Every woman knows what I’m talking about. It’s the presumption that makes it hard, at times, for any woman in any field; that keeps women from speaking up and from being heard when they dare; that crushes young women into silence by indicating, the way harassment on the street does, that this is not their world. It trains us in self-doubt and self-limitation just as it exercises men’s unsupported overconfidence.
                        - Rebecca Solnit, Men Explain Things To Me

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Joe Offer
Date: 22 Jun 26 - 12:01 PM

When I saw the song title, I knew who wrote it.... ;-)

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 22 Jun 26 - 02:57 PM

How do you tell whether your girlfriend is ticklish?
Give her a test tickle!

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Helen
Date: 22 Jun 26 - 05:11 PM

I chose not to open this thread because judging by the title I thought "here we go again, another bawdy song disrespecting women" but what a surprise - it's a song disrespecting men who disrespect women. :-)

Thank you GUEST,The Ancient Matriarch.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: GerryM
Date: 22 Jun 26 - 08:45 PM

Feeling a little testy today, Holly?

Are we having a quiz today? she asked, with a quizzical look on her face.
No, we're having a test today, he replied, with a ******** look on his face.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Helen
Date: 22 Jun 26 - 10:32 PM

LOL!!

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Richard Mellish
Date: 26 Jun 26 - 04:23 AM

No doubt some men do as you describe, but are you suggesting that all men do so?

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Helen
Date: 26 Jun 26 - 03:35 PM

Richard, is your question about whether all men disrespect women?

In my experience, that is a resounding "No!" but there is a small percentage of men who do and some of them also hold positions of power and influence so the effect is multiplied.

I suspect that every woman has experienced disrespect from men at some point in her life. I know I have. Some of the experiences are small enough to leave behind and others are difficult to ignore and can stay forever in our minds and hearts.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Tattie Bogle
Date: 26 Jun 26 - 04:56 PM

As an aside to this, my son’s youngish male cat sustained a nasty laceration to one front paw, so had to be taken to the vet for sutures. So daughter-in-law says “While you’ve got him, will you please castrate him and microchip him?” Looking at it from the cat’s point of view, he thinks, “I only came to get stitched, not to be de-bollocked”!
By the way, his name is Elton, so don’t think he’ll be playing the piano for a wee while!

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Felipa
Date: 27 Jun 26 - 04:47 PM

Tattie Bogle - I saw this discussion thread several hours ago, and during the day I thought about how someone should write on behalf of male livestock, for in farming it's the females who are favoured. Most male chicks in the egg industry are quickly murdered, and female sheep and cattle have a much much higher chance of being allowed to live well into adulthood and to procreate. Few males are needed in the meat and dairy industries, especially now that Artificial Insemination is so widely used. So are there any songs about sex discrimination in animal husbandry?

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Nigel Parsons
Date: 27 Jun 26 - 05:20 PM

Tattie Bogle.
I'm glad you used the basic term 'castrated', rather than trying to find a suitable euphemism.
I don't agree with people who say they're having their 'lady cat' 'doctored'.

I believe in calling a spayed a spayed!

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: GerryM
Date: 27 Jun 26 - 07:08 PM

Felipa, at https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_songs_about_animal_rights there's a long list of songs about animal rights. One of them specifically mentions animal husbandry. I haven't heard the song, so I don't know anything else about it. It's called Potemkin City Limits, by a band called Propagandhi, relased in 2009.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Helen
Date: 27 Jun 26 - 07:16 PM

"...calling a spayed a spayed" - funny!

Yes male farm animals are definitely discriminated against. My maternal grandparents had a large chicken farm. I only remember seeing one rooster at a time there.

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Howard Kaplan
Date: 27 Jun 26 - 10:18 PM

Back in the sixties, I heard the following brief story.

A woman decided to raise chickens, so she went to the supplier and asked him for 20 hens and 20 roosters.

The supplier told her she was taking the wrong approach. For 20 hens, she'd need 1 rooster, maybe 2 roosters.

Her response was "You men are all the same".

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Helen
Date: 27 Jun 26 - 10:53 PM

The problem with having more than one rooster is that they spend all their time fighting each other and making lots of noise and not doing anything productive for their community. ;-)

(Sorry! Couldn't help myself!)

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: GUEST,LTS
Date: 30 Jun 26 - 10:28 AM

I can't help but read them as if they were a Greek hero's name... Testiclees. I got very confused.

No change there then... Great song though!

LTS

Subject: RE: Lyr Add: Testicles
From: Felipa
Date: 05 Jul 26 - 11:30 AM

I once visited a croft in North Uist where there were three cockerels (roosters). They didnt fight much but did make a lot of noise crowing in the morning, and the hens didnt get much rest with all three cocks pursuing them.