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The Haggis season - when does it start?

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Bonzo 03 Oct 99 - 03:36 PM
McKnees 03 Oct 99 - 04:23 PM
wildlone 03 Oct 99 - 04:25 PM
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wildlone 03 Oct 99 - 04:40 PM
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sophocleese 03 Oct 99 - 05:03 PM
katlaughing 03 Oct 99 - 06:12 PM
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Jack Hickman - Kingston, ON 04 Oct 99 - 12:05 AM
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Subject: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bonzo
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 03:36 PM

Help! Watson my Haggis hound is going mad! he keeps flying around the room and barking. i haven't had him long (well a few years now). Does this mean it is the start of the Haggis hunting season or is he at a difficult age? Any suggestions on how to deal with him would be appreciated


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: McKnees
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 04:23 PM

I always thought the season started once the haggi reverse direction and attempt to walk round the mountains with the two longer legs now closer to the mountain. They then roll down the side of the mountain, known as a Ben, where they are rounded up by the Haggis hounds unless they are at a difficult age, where upon the owners of the Haggis hounds check into the NYCFCP aka the Neil young centre for cronic punners and the hounds go to the dogs. McKnees


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: wildlone
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 04:25 PM

According to Ye Olde Booke of Ye Hunting, Ye Haggi cannot be hunted until ye weeke afore Robbie Burns bithday. 25th Jan, So the season starts 18th Jan.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: wildlone
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 04:34 PM

For Further informationclickihope this works


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: wildlone
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 04:40 PM

click here try this


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: wildlone
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 04:49 PM

Bugger it!!!CLICK


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: sophocleese
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 05:03 PM

Here in Canada the haggis season starts November 30th when the first kill of the season is celebrated on St. Andrew's day. The celebration at the end of the season is Robbie Burns day. Christmas, which starts on Labour Day Weekend (the first weekend in September) of course overlaps this which is why so many of the decorations and clothes are a festive plaid. Your haggis hounds may have seen their first Christmas decorations appearing in a store and this may be what set them off. It is an understandable confusion.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: katlaughing
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 06:12 PM

wildlone, I am LMAOWROTF! That was priceless!!


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Ewan McVicar
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 06:23 PM

And some people say that Americans have no sense of no humour!


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bonzo
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 06:31 PM

America? is that anywhere near Sturminster Newton?


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Big Mick
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 07:22 PM

You poor buggers don't seem to know that the name for Ireland in days gone by was Scotia, named after the mother of Amergin, the bard. She was a Chieftain and great warrior. She died in battle when this Milesian Royal family came and settled Ireland. They wrested the land from the Fir Bolg and established the Gaelic culture as the dominant culture in what became Scotia. Generations later a group of these Scotians were driven, or left the North of Ireland and settled in the highlands of what is now Scotland. They established, and after much influence from other groups, became what we now know as the Highland Scot. The languages were even the same until about the seventeenth century. Of course, our Scottish cousins developed a culture that is distinct and unique, and I am proud to claim a certain amount of Scot in my own background.

What's the point, within the context of this thread. It is my humble opinion that Nova Scotia is New Ireland. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHA.....LOL.............Are we going to have fun with this thread or what???????? I may never be safe in Nova Scotia again.

All the best,

Big Mick, the mischievious stirrer


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: katlaughing
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 07:52 PM

To be perfectly correct, Mick, wouldn't that be Nova Erin or Eire?**BG**


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Big Mick
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 08:28 PM

Nope, kat, because Eire was known as Scotia long before it was known as Eire. And Scotland was known as Caledonia. After a time, Scotia became known as Eire, and Caledonia became known as Scotia. Eventually, in the English speaking world, Eire Land became Ireland, and Scotia Land became Scotland. I am sure the scholars out there will point out some corrections to my telling, but in the main, it is factual.

And by the way, that is my people always say that we gave the Scots the bagpipes and never told them the joke...LOL...Double by the way, we also invented whiskey. The Scots have been making a fair version of it, but if ye want the stuff by the folks who invented it, you will have to drink Irish Whiskey. May I suggest Jamesons premium label?
All the best,

Big Mick whoisgoingtoreceivedeaththreatsforstartingthisbitofthreadcreepwhentheScotsgetupinafewhours.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: WyoWoman
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 10:31 PM

Sophocleese, this explains it then. I was just noting today as I drove through a couple of Wyoming towns that many of the local men were dressed in festive plaid, with contrasting festive plaid caps and camouflage pants. I didn't know what to make of it, but now it's completely clear to me: Haggis season has come to Wyoming.

Does one have to field dress a haggis, or just schlepp 'em back to the butcher? And is it their coats that are used to make the festive plaid for the next season's hung?

Er, hunt. Hunt.

That damned Freud's been using my log-on again...

ww


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Malcolm Douglas
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 10:44 PM

It is with regret that I must agree that the historical evidence suggests that whisk(e)y was being made in Ireland for quite some time before Scotland perfected that art, though of course distillation was developed by the Arabs, from whom we get the word "alcohol". Back on topic (nearly), however, it is well-attested that Scotland can with justification lay claim to the Haggis (Haggis Caledoniensis) where Ireland appears to possess no native species of that animal. Saint Patrick is sometimes credited -or blamed, depending on your point of view- for this. The Canadian variant referred to earlier is, strictly speaking, an example of the "mock" haggis (I forget the latin); although there are obvious superficial similarities, they are in fact quite separate species and cannot, so far as research has been able to determine, successfully interbreed.

Malcolm


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: DonMeixner
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 10:57 PM

Here in Central New York (State not City) we have a variety of the Haggis that while not generally thot to be a game animal usually not hunted till after the spawn in October. The Haggis run is usually triggered by some warm rains and two frosts in rapib succession. The Haggi , plural of Haggis, Haggis being the singular of Haggi , begin to change color on much the same manner and color of the Maple leaves. This makes the Haggis nearly invisible to the eye when not in motion. Great swarms of Haggi hang about under trees in Hustles. Hustles being the name of the plural swarm of Haggi. Like a herd of cattle. The trigger to make the Hustled Haggi hike hither is usually a wind. The entire Hustle may take off enmasse and by doing so be vertually indestinquishable from the Maple leaves.

lately among the Haggis hunters here abouts there has been a Hue and cry about the planned requirement of the migratory Haggis stamp. Haggis Unlimited is planning a protest but the government willout I'm affraid. The stamp is planned to show a hearty Haggis standing on a mountain crag quarter on and viewedfrom below to give a majestic stature to this fine bit of wild game.

Even now I can hear the faint sounds of a Hustle of Haggis as they prepare their trek north to the plains of Scarberia. It figures that the Haggis would go north in colder weather. Obviously a part of their Scottish heritage.

Regards

Don


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Malcolm Douglas
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 11:22 PM

While it is entirely possible that you have in New York State a "naturalised" (English spelling) community of Haggises ("Haggi" is false etymology) which may have at some point escaped from captivity and bred successfully, I am still firm in my belief that this is a species only recently introduced; your remarks about their migratory behaviour might tend to confirm that. On the other hand, the arboreal habits you describe (particularly with reference to the Maple) are more characteristic of the "mock" haggis I mentioned earlier; the true haggis (Gaelic,"Taigeis") is better adapted to a more-or-less treeless habitat.

Malcolm


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: katlaughing
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 11:38 PM

And, would that be the pseudo haggises, then, Malcolm? And, what with the mixing up o'the names an all, tis no wonder m' mither got called "black Irish" when her only known heritage was Scots and English! Ach, wot's a girl ta do, then?

ConfuseddescendantoftheNovaScotianCrawfords&ScottishEwingsamangothers*BG*


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: DonMeixner
Date: 03 Oct 99 - 11:47 PM

Malcolm,

No doubt you are correct in much you state. Haggi is a local coloquielism and can't be considered the difinitve etymology. I would posit that there is an Arboreal variety just as there are desert shrews there are woodland shrews. The local wiley Haggis is the prefred meal of mainy the ridge runner who can't out gun the Possum or the Whistle pig. Cooked over a fire of hickory and served on a bed of steamed nettles and Wooley Dock. Chased with a glass of Old Stump Blower and nothing is the same ever again. Victuals at their finest.

Don


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Jack Hickman - Kingston, ON
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 12:05 AM

Back several threads, someone referred to Scotland as Caledonia. About that period in pre-history, the Romans were referring to what we know as Ireland as Hibernia.

Keep the Faith

Jack Hickman


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Big Mick
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 01:07 AM

That is another of the names that Ireland was known by post Scotia. I did not mean to imply that these were at the same time.

Mick


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MudGuard
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 02:48 AM

Bonzo, Click here to see that Amerika is south-east of Oldenburg in Niedersachsen (Lower Saxonia) in the North of Germany.
So Amerika is not near Sturminster Newton.
There is another Amerika in Sachsen (Saxonia) southeast of Zwickau, but that one is too small to get into the Online-Maps.

I did not know that you have to hunt Haggis. I thought it was just sold by these Fast-Food vans all over Scotland. And I did not know there is hound in it. And that it is sold only during a season...


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Ewan McVicar
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 11:45 AM

No, wait a minute, I got it wrong.
Some people say that Americans do have a sense of humour.
Well, some of them.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: wildlone
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 02:58 PM

Thanks kat I am finding it hard to type using one hand but i try.
yours wildlone nursing his broken arm and bruises IFOMC.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bonzo
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 04:24 PM

Does this mean i have to put up with his behaviour until after the new year? I don't think my sanity (or furniture!) will take much more of this. can anyone recommend any medication that may help? is there a Haggis substitute or do they need "the thrill of the hunt". I have also heard stories of left handed and right handed Haggis (depending on side of short legs) and the perils of cross breeding? is this true? and how would this effect my much tormented hound! Bonzo


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MMario
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 04:27 PM

there are fossil records of "fore-handed" and "back-handed" haggi as well, but both those sub-species died rapidly, as fore-handed haggi were only able to climb UP-hill and the back-handed haggis was only able to climb DOWN-hill.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: sophocleese
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 04:31 PM

You could use a bagpiper as a haggis substitute if you think he needs the thrill of the hunt. If he does manage to catch the bagpipes let him eat them and we'll all feel better.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bert
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 04:49 PM

Of course, once you've caught your haggis, you have the problem of dressing it. Seeing as they are made up of all guts in the first place, by the time you've cleaned him out, there's bugger all left.

Hmmm, to us Sassenachs that may NOT BE a problem.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: lamarca
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 06:22 PM

As a researcher at the National Institutes of Health, I am please to report that actual medical research on the consumption of haggis has been published in the legitimate medical research. Check here for a Medline reference to this interesting study, which includes a histopathology of Haggis scotiensis tissues...


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: lamarca
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 06:22 PM

As a researcher at the National Institutes of Health, I am please to report that actual medical research on the consumption of haggis has been published in the legitimate medical research. Check here for a Medline reference to this interesting study, which includes a histopathology of Haggis scotiensis tissues...


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: lamarca
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 06:26 PM

Oops, you need to select the article by Fraser, et al, in The British Medical Journal, not he many published by Dr. Haggis himself...


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Malcolm Douglas
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 08:47 PM

Don

What on earth is a "Whistle-Pig"? I like the sound of the recipe, by the way, but the Woolly Dock and Old Stump Blower might be a trifle hard to get in Yorkshire. Fortunately I do at least know a good haggis dealer, and we have plenty of nettles.

Malcolm


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: DonMeixner
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 09:09 PM

Malcolm,

The wiley whistle pig is a local name for the Woodchuck. They are called whistle pigs because when frightened they whistle. A large rodent that resembles a cavy (Guinea Pig) only universally brown in color. They are harmless in the extreme and while slow of wit they make up for it by being very dumb. Some of the old timers in the area say they taste alot like goat. I've never eaten whistle pig my self so I can't say.

Wooly Dock grows here in the states and a variety is found in your neck of the woods. Interestingly it can be a cure for stings from nettles. I've never eaten it either, it may well be very poisonous so don't try it with the nettles. Try BurrDock instead.

Old Stumpblower can be a problem too, Try Kohler beer The pale dry stale ale with the head on the bottom. Failing that, Guinesses will have todo.

Don


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Malcolm Douglas
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 10:08 PM

Don

Ah, I see, the Woodchuck.

"How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?"

I have occasionally wondered.

We call Woolly Docks "Dock Leaves". I should think they're edible if steamed or boiled, but nettles (with plenty of butter, and picked young) would be a lot nicer. Like blackberries, they have to be picked before that time in the early autumn when the Devil goes round and pisses on them.

Malcolm


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: DonMeixner
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 10:17 PM

Malcolm

A woodchuck would if a woodchuck could, chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could if a woodchuck would chuck wood.

Pretty simple really.

Don


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Malcolm Douglas
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 10:41 PM

Don

Er...right.

Malcolm


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Susan A-R
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 10:44 PM

i had always thought that Haggis mated with good whiskey, and suspected that the hunting season was at some point after this mating, but then I'm ont much in touch with my Scots heritage. Now mealy pudding is another matter. . .


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Malcolm Douglas
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 11:01 PM

I think that the role of whisky (no "e" in Haggis territory!) is more of a catalytic nature than anything else. Laphroaig for preference.

Malolm,


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: WyoWoman
Date: 04 Oct 99 - 11:22 PM

How would one pronounce Laphroaig, and what precisely is it? I see it being ordered over there at the tavern a good deal, but it alway sounds sort of froggy and unattractive to me. But then, as an accompaniment to haggis, that might actually recommend it...

WW


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Malcolm Douglas
Date: 05 Oct 99 - 03:42 PM

"La-froyg", more or less. It's a very peaty Islay malt. Not in the least froggy, but you need to enjoy strong flavours. Yum!

Malcolm


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bonzo
Date: 05 Oct 99 - 04:58 PM

I don't know what my Haggis hound would do if he found a frog? come to think of it i don't know what he would do if he found a Haggis? Any ideas (or even just gut reactions!)

Bonzo


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Malcolm Douglas
Date: 05 Oct 99 - 08:14 PM

A Haggis hound will ignore a frog if properly trained.

Malcolm


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Graham Pirt
Date: 06 Oct 99 - 07:49 AM

What a fascinating thread. Here I was thinking that a haggis was something made out of bits of beast and oats and all the time you hunt them! What have I missed all these years. If I'd remembered clearly I would have known better because up in Irvine in Scotland there is a hotel that displays varieties of haggis that have been caught in the area!


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: WyoWoman
Date: 06 Oct 99 - 09:12 AM

They have often been known to cavort with jackalope in these parts, but I understand from this thread that they couldn't possibly be native haggis.

Yes, Malcolm, I do indeed love strong flavors. I wonder if Lafroig (sp?) is available here in the U.S. Anyone? Anyone? (Of course, here in Wyoming, Jameson's has been an exotic drink until just recently, so the odds may be against me....)

WW


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: bobby's girl
Date: 06 Oct 99 - 01:44 PM

Unfortunately Malcolm, I know from bitter experience that Bonzo's haggis hound is anything but well trained! The only way he could do any serious damage to a haggis is possibly drown it as he tries to lick it to death!


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MMario
Date: 06 Oct 99 - 01:49 PM

But weren't Haggis Hounds specifically bred to drool their prey to death? thus simulating the natural drowning of the Haggi as they tunble down the mountainsides into the streams below?


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bonzo
Date: 06 Oct 99 - 01:55 PM

booby's girl, I dont know what you mean, he's only ever been pleased to see you! but if MMario is right i think watson may need some optical correction!

Bonzo


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bonzo
Date: 06 Oct 99 - 02:01 PM

Sorry bobby's girl - dyslexia lures ko! must try to improve my tryping kills

Bonzo


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MMario
Date: 06 Oct 99 - 02:19 PM

I think Frued is in here posting under other names again.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: DonMeixner
Date: 21 Dec 01 - 08:55 PM

With the lateness of the first frosts and no warm rains this season the Haggis migration has been sporatic and largely undependable. There is great concern among the kilted few in the area of finding a suitable Haggis for the Robert Burns birthday dinner.

The St. Andrews Society, at best a schizophrenic lot, is of two minds about it. Some say to get a locally raised freerange haggis while the other lot will have none of it. Mr. Campbell Mac Donald was heard to say, "If we ca' noo get a' wild one, Burn a ' Brattwurst, cover it w' Ketchup an' feed it tae the tooorists! They'll nae tell tha' difference and we can sssspend the savings on single malt!"

When put to the vote it came up as tie with three obstaining while they wait word from Haggis Unlimited about some farm raised and released in the wild Haggi from a Haggis Forever program run by a local 4-H.

Don


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Rt Revd Sir jOhn from Hull
Date: 21 Dec 01 - 09:36 PM

The last time I went to Scotland I bought a haggis sandwich, it was horrible, it was just like straw and i wont buy one again.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: GUEST,.gargoyle
Date: 21 Dec 01 - 11:00 PM

Not much more than a jacking haggis have ever been known to cavort with a Wyoming Women.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: GUEST,.gargoyle
Date: 21 Dec 01 - 11:10 PM

From the first R.W. Service book I ever bought. Rhymes of a Red Cross Man and next to the "Cow Juice Cure" my favorite poem.

The Haggis of Private McPhee

"Hae ye heard whit ma auld mither's postit tae me?
It fair maks me hamesick," says Private McPhee.
"And whit did she send ye?" says Private McPhun,
As he cockit his rifle and bleezed at a Hun.
"A haggis! A HAGGIS!" says Private McPhee;
"The brawest big haggis I ever did see.
And think! it's the morn when fond memory turns
Tae haggis and whuskey -- the Birthday o' Burns.
We maun find a dram; then we'll ca' in the rest
O' the lads, and we'll hae a Burns' Nicht wi' the best."
"Be ready at sundoon," snapped Sergeant McCole;
"I want you two men for the List'nin' Patrol."
Then Private McPhee looked at Private McPhun:
"I'm thinkin', ma lad, we're confoundedly done."
Then Private McPhun looked at Private McPhee:
"I'm thinkin' auld chap, it's a' aff wi' oor spree."
But up spoke their crony, wee Wullie McNair:
"Jist lea' yer braw haggis for me tae prepare;
And as for the dram, if I search the camp roun',
We maun hae a drappie tae jist haud it doon.
Sae rin, lads, and think, though the nicht it be black,
O' the haggis that's waitin' ye when ye get back."
My! but it wis waesome on Naebuddy's Land,
And the deid they were rottin' on every hand.
And the rockets like corpse candles hauntit the sky,
And the winds o' destruction went shudderin' by.
There wis skelpin' o' bullets and skirlin' o' shells,
And breengin' o' bombs and a thoosand death-knells;
But cooryin' doon in a Jack Johnson hole
Little fashed the twa men o' the List'nin' Patrol.
For sweeter than honey and bricht as a gem
Wis the thocht o' the haggis that waitit for them.v Yet alas! in oor moments o' sunniest cheer
Calamity's aften maist cruelly near.
And while the twa talked o' their puddin' divine
The Boches below them were howkin' a mine.
And while the twa cracked o' the feast they would hae,
The fuse it wis burnin' and burnin' away.
Then sudden a roar like the thunner o' doom,
A hell-leap o' flame . . . then the wheesht o' the tomb.
"Haw, Jock! Are ye hurtit?" says Private McPhun.
"Ay, Geordie, they've got me; I'm fearin' I'm done.
It's ma leg; I'm jist thinkin' it's aff at the knee;
Ye'd best gang and leave me," says Private McPhee.
"Oh leave ye I wunna," says Private McPhun;
"And leave ye I canna, for though I micht run,
It's no faur I wud gang, it's no muckle I'd see:
I'm blindit, and that's whit's the maitter wi' me."
Then Private McPhee sadly shakit his heid:
"If we bide here for lang, we'll be bidin' for deid.
And yet, Geordie lad, I could gang weel content
If I'd tasted that haggis ma auld mither sent."
"That's droll," says McPhun; "ye've jist speakit ma mind.
Oh I ken it's a terrible thing tae be blind;
And yet it's no that that embitters ma lot --
It's missin' that braw muckle haggis ye've got."
For a while they were silent; then up once again
Spoke Private McPhee, though he whussilt wi' pain:
"And why should we miss it? Between you and me
We've legs for tae run, and we've eyes for tae see.
You lend me your shanks and I'll lend you ma sicht,
And we'll baith hae a kyte-fu' o' haggis the nicht."
Oh the sky it wis dourlike and dreepin' a wee,
When Private McPhun gruppit Private McPhee.
Oh the glaur it wis fylin' and crieshin' the grun',
When Private McPhee guidit Private McPhun.
"Keep clear o' them corpses -- they're maybe no deid!
Haud on! There's a big muckle crater aheid.
Look oot! There's a sap; we'll be haein' a coup.
A staur-shell! For Godsake! Doun, lad, on yer daup.
Bear aff tae yer richt. . . . Aw yer jist daein' fine:
Before the nicht's feenished on haggis we'll dine."
There wis death and destruction on every hand;
There wis havoc and horror on Naebuddy's Land.
And the shells bickered doun wi' a crump and a glare,
And the hameless wee bullets were dingin' the air.
Yet on they went staggerin', cooryin' doun
When the stutter and cluck o' a Maxim crept roun'.
And the legs o' McPhun they were sturdy and stoot,
And McPhee on his back kept a bonnie look-oot.
"On, on, ma brave lad! We're no faur frae the goal;
I can hear the braw sweerin' o' Sergeant McCole."
But strength has its leemit, and Private McPhun,
Wi' a sab and a curse fell his length on the grun'.
Then Private McPhee shoutit doon in his ear:
"Jist think o' the haggis! I smell it from here.
It's gushin' wi' juice, it's embaumin' the air;
It's steamin' for us, and we're -- jist -- aboot -- there."
Then Private McPhun answers: "Dommit, auld chap!
For the sake o' that haggis I'll gang till I drap."
And he gets on his feet wi' a heave and a strain,
And onward he staggers in passion and pain.
And the flare and the glare and the fury increase,
Till you'd think they'd jist taken a' hell on a lease.
And on they go reelin' in peetifu' plight,
And someone is shoutin' away on their right;
And someone is runnin', and noo they can hear
A sound like a prayer and a sound like a cheer;
And swift through the crash and the flash and the din,
The lads o' the Hielands are bringin' them in.
"They're baith sairly woundit, but is it no droll
Hoo they rave aboot haggis?" says Sergeant McCole.
When hirplin alang comes wee Wullie McNair,
And they a' wonnert why he wis greetin' sae sair.
And he says: "I'd jist liftit it oot o' the pot,
And there it lay steamin' and savoury hot,
When sudden I dooked at the fleech o' a shell,
And it -- dropped on the haggis and dinged it tae hell."
And oh but the lads were fair taken aback;
Then sudden the order wis passed tae attack,
And up from the trenches like lions they leapt,
And on through the nicht like a torrent they swept.
On, on, wi' their bayonets thirstin' before!
On, on tae the foe wi' a rush and a roar!
And wild to the welkin their battle-cry rang,
And doon on the Boches like tigers they sprang:
And there wisna a man but had death in his ee,
For he thocht o' the haggis o' Private McPhee.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Chip2447
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 02:12 AM

YOU BARBARIC ANIMALS!!! How on earth can you justify killing such beautiful creatures.

The S.P.C.H and haggises rights foundation of Liberal, California are going to hear about all of you.

I hope they punish you by making you eat sheep's organs that have been boiled in the sheep's stomach.

YOU COLD HEARTED BASTARDS.
Chip2447


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Tone d' F
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 03:09 AM

As long as you leave Cornish Pastie hunting alone, fine by me


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Clinton Hammond
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 09:29 AM

Regarding the hunting of bagpipers...

While studying medieval history in York, chummer of mine was tickled to discover that there is still an old law on the books, that makes it legal to shoot Scots with arrows from the walls of the city...

What do you call a thousand pipers under 6 feet of peat?

A damn good start!!

Regarding "Laphroaig"...

Yummie!!!! I describe it as kinda a nice black rubber taste the uninitiated... I also compare it to the pleasant smell of gasoline! When I do have scotch, I go for the peaty stuff! And I dream of all the bagpipers under it!

LOL!!!


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: GUEST,Desdemona
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 09:48 AM

Haggis season? Och, laddie---does it ivver ind?!

All those yummy, peaty single malts are a few of my favourite things; Laphroaig being way up at the top of the list--and highly medicinal it is, too!


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 11:03 AM

The best Cornish pasties are from the Upper Peninsula of Michigan -- and I originate from there, too. (But I was born when I was very young and I'm 52 years away from there now.)

Well, so I haven't sampled any Youper pasties for awhile, but I have exported the recipe and kept it safe (and used!). Goes best with Laphroaig, too. (As does that Scots meatloaf everyone's talking about above.)

Linn


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 12:07 PM

Price of sporrans will be going up then....

LTS


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 12:36 PM

Up here in the highlands, the haggis season starts just after the arrival of the first American tourist of the year.
Failte.....Jock


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bill D
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 07:35 PM

seems to me that haggis are much too cute too hunt!...People should just let them run free!

or...hmmm...this little critter is also identifed as Haggis ...now I'm confused.

...but not about the best whiskey!...Laphroiag is WAY too peaty!...but I wouldn't mind a wee dram o' Talisker...now there's a flavor to knock your socks off that tastes like something more than smoked vegetation! (for everyday I prefer Highland Park or what I am having as I type..Glenmorangie from Madeira casks)


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bill D
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 07:45 PM

tsk...I put that 'e' in whisky! *running quickly behind myself and kicking me in the butt*

but now I am even MORE confused, for this picture of the wild haggis has little resemblance to the others! Perhaps an inbred line?


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Cobble
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 07:47 PM

Bill D.. will join you, if I may, with the Talisker... then we can watch the wee haggis dancing in the heather.. thats if my Skye Terriers don't get wind of 'em. *BG*

Mrs C


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bill D
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 07:55 PM

indeed you may, Mrs. C!....but some of them are pretty fierce , so Skye Terriers may be our best line of defense!...(well, except for Talisker breath, which will ward off the meanest haggis!)


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bill D
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 07:58 PM

you DO need to scroll to the bottom to read about the capture of the young male haggis and find the link to his picture...


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bill D
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 08:12 PM

is there no shame? Travesties!!!

haggis & fries

Haggis Helper!

enough!


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Bill D
Date: 22 Dec 01 - 08:26 PM

but NO!... here the history and details of the haggis hunt are detailed! With old engraving of the Haggis hunt!

ah, scholarship in the digital age is SO rewarding!

now...my wife demands the computer for mundane purposes...*sigh*


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Hillheader
Date: 23 Dec 01 - 05:11 AM

The haggis is an ugly bird
And hunting it is quite absurd
Two long legs and one more short
So on the hills it can cavort.

You shoot its short front leg away
Then watch it try to upright stay
Until it falls and bangs its snout
Upon a rock its then knocked out

But now your troubles just begin
How do you kill the ruddy thing?
It looks at you with big sad eyes
You feel like Satan in disguise

So you decide to let it go
You lift it softly from the snow
And gently throw it in the air
But the bastard craps right in your hair.

Because you see you sorry lot
The haggis is a bloody Scot
And if you hurt us in any way
We'll get you back the self same day

Big Mick, death threats are not our style
But I would not close my eyes a-while
Or you'll hear as you nod your head
Ten thousand pipers by your bed.

So let the poor wee haggis be
And if you catch one, set it free
But if you catch a Scot I think
It's better just to buy him drink!!!


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 23 Dec 01 - 05:38 AM

Aye Bill D, I find the Laphroig much too much like lysol for my taste buds. Glenmorangie is distilled about 20 miles from where I live, but do your self a flavour and go about 15 miles north to Brora, and try my favourite Clynelish. Pronounced cline-leash. There are too many lovely malts to name, but I'm not a fan of Glenmorangie original, and haven't tried the various different cask flavourings that they are doing now, I suspect that they may be just a clever marketing ploy.
Slainte....Jock


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Joe Offer
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 08:58 PM

There are certain important threads that need refreshing from time to time. This thread is certainly one of those.

Oh, I came across an interesting Website: The Scottish Haggis Website - for those unwilling to make their own. If I read the description correctly, this haggis is "140 years in the making." Yum. Good stuff.

What prompted me to refresh this thread is one of today's quotes from igoogle.com:
    My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare.
    - Mike Myers


'nuff said.
-Joe Offer-


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: GUEST,DonMeixner
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 12:16 AM

The debate over the effects of global warming on the Haggis Spawn is just starting to heat up. Haggis Unlimited has started a study but as they are a large committee nothing is expected to come of the effort.

The Haggis of central New York are found mainly in the finger lakes region and as such are forced to migrate in a Northern direction. Had they been found anywhere else they would be Westerly migratory as they are found that way through out the civilized world. But the north south lay of the Lakes makes westerly migration almost impossible.

I was sick with pneumonia so I missed the round up this year. A bill was passed in the Legislature to use a colored dye to mark the Haggis and the ranches they came from. The traditional branding of the Haggis has proven to be fatal to about fifty percent of the Haggis. There is a move by the traditionalists to go back to branding with the promise to use irons with shorter names.

Don


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 05:45 AM

Doesn't MMario live around the Finger Lakes?
G


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: GUEST,Mad Jock
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 05:50 AM

No one has mentioned that it is unwise to hunt haggis until after the young have fledged the nest and that only mature beasts may be taken. Thats those over 5 years old who have lost their wings and can no longer fly and thats why they are easy to catch.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: GUEST,Don Meixner
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 09:57 AM

Hi Giok,

Yes he does. MMario and I are nearly neighbors. He lives about 45 miles west of me. Google up a New York state map and search out Jordan(Me) and Penn Yann(MMario). Pamela from Ithaca is also a Finger Lakes area resident.

Don


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: GUEST,old git
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 11:18 AM

I was always taught as a lad that the Haggis hunting season lasted just 2 days...30 and 31 February.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: maeve
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 09:04 AM

2007-2008 Haggis Hunt, with prizes!

Fire away, O Noble Hunters of the Haggis!

maeve


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MMario
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 09:12 AM

I prefer my haggis live trapped and fed for a week on whisky and oatcakes.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 09:23 AM

Saw a herd of them on the way back home from Salt Lake City yesterday. They looked to be pretty scrawny this year, and the paper this morning said that the Dept of Fish, Game and Haggises had closed the season due to "incipient scrawn."


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 09:49 AM

Nah that wasn't Haggi, they flock.
G


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MartinRyan
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 10:43 AM

Here h'Oireland, haggis are (happily) h'extinct.

We are now reduced to even more surreal forms of 'unting. Having acquired a Green Party Minister for the Environment, our last remaining deer hunt was only granted a license for its annual foray, on condition that the deer used to set a trail was safely retrapped before the hounds were released....

Regards


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MartinRyan
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 10:44 AM

That should, of course, have been:

Here in hOireland..."

Regards


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 10:57 AM

Did they leave with the snakes, by order of St Pat?
G


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Goose Gander
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 11:05 AM

A 'Whistle-Pig' is, I believe, a groundhog rather than a woodchuck:

From the singing of Doc Watson . . .

"I dug down but I didn't dig deep
I dug down but I didn't dig deep
There lay a whistle-pig fast asleep
O! Groundhog."


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MMario
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 11:10 AM

but groundhogs *are* woodchucks.

The American woodchuck is the largest member of the marmot family - did you know that?


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 11:26 AM

Woodpussy and Whistlepig

G


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Goose Gander
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 11:26 AM

So, then, how much ground could a groundhog hog, if a groundhog could hog ground?


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MMario
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 11:32 AM

A ground hog would hog as much ground as a ground hog CAN hog if a ground hog could hog ground...and actually - they can, and do.
Amazing how widespread they can make a burrow system.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: maeve
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 11:33 AM

"Groundhogs keep creeping in the thread..."

Gentlemen: Kindly make your own groundhog thread, eh?

Back to our regularly scheduled haggis...


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MMario
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 11:35 AM

I'll have you know that cross-comparision of mitochondrial DNA between the Haggis (Nova Scotia variety) and the American Woodchuck show that there may well be some interbreeding occuring between the two populations.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: maeve
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 11:41 AM

Nonsense, Sirrah! Click the link provided upthread to learn of the Golden Haggis, whose genetic code lingers throughout all known haggis populations and effectively precludes any such interbreeding with the otherwise prolific woodchuck clan.

With all due respect,

maeve, gonehuntinghaggistowinaPrize


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MMario
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 11:51 AM

oh, yeah? well they said that mathematically a bee cannot fly! Reality often precludes theory.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: maeve
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 12:00 PM

LOL, MMario. "They" said lots of things. Come hunt the haggis with me and we can further discuss the transcontinental haggis possibilities. I just sighted a golden haggis in Edinburgh!

Pax,

maeve


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 12:00 PM

Butterflies cause chaos.
G

Sorry Ilex


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Schantieman
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 12:34 PM

It's only bumble bees (Bombyx spp) that can't fly. Honeybees (Apis mellifera) can - otherwise how would they collect nectar and stuff?

Steve


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: maeve
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 12:43 PM

It was indeed the bumblebee that confusticated theorists, but a bumble can fly and is not a haggis therefore I conclude 'tis indeed time to hunt the haggis. Will anyone join me in that worthy endeavor?

maeve


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MMario
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 12:54 PM

Huh? Bombyx is silkworms!

Do you mean Bombus?


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 12:56 PM

Gee, a brainy haggis from the Finger lakes :)


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: MMario
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 12:57 PM

Blame it on Cornell - I do.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: maeve
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 03:31 PM

The Haggis' Zoology for your edification and amusement.

maeve


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 03:34 PM

A Haggiography indeed.
G


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: GUEST,TJ in San Diego
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 06:27 PM

I once knew a chap in Fresno, CA, whose father had emigrated from Scotland around 1904 or so. Seeking to keep faith with his forebears, the son, a newly minted architect, attended a St. Andrew's Day festival and Highland Games with his new bride (circa 1940). She told the story on him in the 1960's. As the haggis was being piped in, my acquaintance looked at his bride and whispered, "I'm havin' none of that - I know what's in it and it stinks!" A very large lady with long henna-red hair leaned across and slapped him on the back, saying, "Ah, c'mon Alistair; it'll put some lead in yer pencil!"


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: Rapparee
Date: 28 Dec 07 - 06:34 PM

Actually, the correct term for a group of Idaho Haggii is "bunch" as in, "Look at that bunch of sorry-lookin' haggii over there!" I used the term I did earlier because I was afraid that the more technical term wouldn't be understood.


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Subject: RE: The Haggis season - when does it start?
From: maeve
Date: 30 Dec 07 - 05:50 PM

Haggis ahead...


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Mudcat time: 24 January 5:40 PM EST

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