Nasty Nursery Rhymes

Subject: RE: Nasty Nursery Rhymes
From: GUEST,ach05
Date: 18 Oct 17 - 02:01 PM

this little monkey
ran round the country
fell down a black hole
cut his little butt hole
what colour was his blood?

Subject: RE: Nasty Nursery Rhymes
From: GUEST,Nasty Boy
Date: 25 Feb 19 - 09:40 AM

Mary had a little scooter whose fleece was white as snow, and when you played with her big hooters, she was sure to blow.

Subject: RE: Nasty Nursery Rhymes
From: GUEST,Axel
Date: 28 Mar 21 - 04:28 PM

Old McDonald, sittin' on a bench,
Beatin' his meat with a monkey wrench
Missed his meat and hit his balls,
Then he pissed his overalls

Subject: RE: Nasty Nursery Rhymes
From: GUEST,Jiggers
Date: 29 Mar 21 - 09:01 AM

There is a song to the tune of Jake the Peg, my flatmates used to sing after coming back from group hiking trips - I can only remember a few verses

My name is Jack, tiddly-ack, tiddly-ack
I'm a necrophiliac, tiddly-ack, tiddly-ack

I get frustrated, tiddly-ated, tiddly-ated
When I see them get cremated

It makes me chunder tiddly-under tiddly-under
When I see them 6 feet under.

.... etc ...,,

A childhood rhyme that my mother told me that existed before my time. Barney Wooster was a local bread making purveyor. Tune is Knees up Mother Brown

Barney Woosters' bread
It sits in your stomach like lead
Not a bit of wonder,
You fart like thunder
Barney Woosters bread.

Slight variation of nasty rhyme that appears several times in this thread. Don't know name of accompanying tune.

Diahorrea custard, Diahorrea pie
All mixed together with a dead dogs eye
Snatters on toast, nice and thick
All washed down with a cup of hot sick

Subject: RE: Nasty Nursery Rhymes
From: Snuffy
Date: 29 Mar 21 - 09:57 AM

That mention of thunder has brought back memories from the mid 1950s of this little gem:

Hark, hark I hear thunder
Must be the peas I ate last Monda'
Quick, quick to the toilet door
Whoops! too late: it's on the floor.