BS: Secret Santa messages part two

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Megan L
Date: 01 Dec 07 - 10:39 AM

Thats NO fair

Heres me tryin tae be the best wee lassie in toon when Santa goes and gets Dauvitt involved. noo they are gangin up oan me and only allowin me tae open wan present each day.

Santa Dauvitt luks awfy pretty stuck in the corner wie his wee hat oan an the bell is jist grand fur warnin me when he is sneakin up oan me. Mind you I might hae tae confiscate the dummy since hes a big enough sook :)

1st December a fiber optic lamp

Thank you Santa

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 02 Dec 07 - 03:12 AM

Megan - are you sure it's Dauvitt with a bell on and not a rogue morris dancer that strayed too far north?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: artbrooks
Date: 02 Dec 07 - 08:57 AM

With a bell on what, exactly?

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 02 Dec 07 - 09:41 AM

With certain morris dancers, it's best not to enquire too closely Art...

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Megan L
Date: 02 Dec 07 - 10:55 AM

Weel Liz He is sat in the corner ding the wee bell an mumblin roon the dummy.How many days till the big day? Hmm I might have to find another pacifier next week :)

Day 2 card making kit and embosser

Jings santa ahm fair bein spoiled this year.

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Da BOSS
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 02:59 AM

OK me little Danish Bacon slice, it should be winging its way to you this week.

As instructed before, you may open the two with purple wrapping as soon as you get it. That should keep you quiet for a bit.

The others must be left until Christmas Eve - see? I've studied you foreigners and your funny ways.

Now remember, be good and do what Da BOSS says!

BOSS

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Megan L
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 04:35 AM

He he he he Viking and good in the same sentance now theres something thats never been seen before ;)

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 05:18 AM

Good for nothing Viking?
There you go Meg, is that better?
G

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: bfdk
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 06:01 AM

Esteemed BOSS Santa,

Thank you, I shall be looking forward to your communication. I'm actually very good at keeping my fingers to myself. Last year's SS pressie sat undisturbed in a corner from late November until the afternoon of the 24th when I opened the OUTER box and allowed myself to open ONE of the individually wrapped gifts inside (I went straight for the CD-shaped one, I must admit.. ;-)). The rest were opened on Christmas Eve. So, you may safely assume that I can do likewise this year.

Something to keep me quiet for a bit? Uhm... not a gag and a signed photo of George W. Bush, I hope? That *would* scare me into silence and not only for a bit, that's for sure!

Esteemed BOSS Santa, you keep talking of edibles, Danish pastry, bacon slices and the like.. Do you work in the food industry or catering business, by any chance?

Reverent greetings,

Bente

Meg and Giok - "By their friends shall ye know them", eh? Oops, guess I just incriminated myself big time there!!

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Alaska Mike
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 10:10 AM

An interesting and colorful package arrived from my not so Secret Santa down under. I will wait a "reasonable" amount of time before opening. (Like maybe this afternoon). Thank you Santa.

Mike

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 10:11 AM

I got another post card from Santa this morning!! Thank you!!

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: ranger1
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 11:15 AM

Dear Santa, I have been really, really, really good this year.

Really.

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Stilly's Silly Secret Santa
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 12:30 PM

Maggie, Never Fear, Santa'a Here!
You will be recieving your pressies on time. And some lovely single malt in a "to go" container along with the ginger snaps would be lovely, thank you.

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Megan L
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 12:37 PM

Dear Santa I hope the beady thing was a necklace cause it goes well with one of my outfits. Ted now resides beside several other precious teds including the prayer bear my brother bought me when Dauvitt was in hospital. I have to be good till the big day or Dauvitt says he will confiscate some of the pressies :(

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Secsy's SS
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 02:05 PM

Vell my leedle tit fancier, ve haff hald ein vote und ve haff decided, zat in spite of your inability to behave, ve vill send you ein present anyvay.
Zo my kleine vogelfreunde, vatch ze post.
JA!
Ve haff vays of makinck you dread zee postemann knockink zwei times.
SSSS

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Chantyranger's Anonymous SS
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 03:33 PM

'Twas early in December, in '07, I think
Heave away, haul away
That Chantyranger's prezzie got dropped in the drink
And I'm bound fer Cali-for-nye-ay!

Got stomped in the middle, got flattened by a truck
Heave away, haul away
Got chased by a raccoon, got nibbled by a duck
And I'm bound fer Cali-for-nye-ay!

Now, what did it do to deserve such a fate?
Heave away, haul away
Just the old Postal Service trying not to be late!
And I'm bound fer Cali-for-nye-ay!

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Jennie G's SSS
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 04:16 PM

Well my little Oz fairy, are you being good still?
I do hope so, as the boomers have been in training for the short hop to the Sydney area.
I assume that the park behind the Opera House is big enough to land in?
We still have spies out, so beware.
J o's SS

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 04:34 PM

OO-err...

harumph...

Now look here Santa - if you knew the things I've had to do this last month.... well, you'd let me drink the sherry for a start!

I'm intrigued now because I don't remember setting me a santa and to get one after all the letters I've failed to post and parcels I've failed to pass along... well, I'm moved, really I am.

Thank you, who ever you are!

SECSY
LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Squeeky Lizzy's Reel Secret Santa
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 04:57 PM

Harumph!! Do not listen to any cheap imitations, no matter how well-intentioned they may sound. Your pressie (and one for the Munchkin) shall be in the post very soon.   And if you must be moved, please try to make it down the hall first!

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Vectisssss Santa of the Secret Kind.
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 05:46 PM

Heloooooo Vectis.

LTS sent me a letter telling me you were travelling a to celebrate your Christmas. As I whiz about all over the show, which chimney would you like me to drop your present down, year or there?

Sotsk

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: SINSULL
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 07:01 PM

I sent my Santa's package off yesterday. Hope it arrives in one piece. If not there is going to be a very unpleasant sticky mess. LOL Happy Holidays.

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Elf Droopydrawers, pondering..
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 07:02 PM

I do wonder what it was Drippynose saw when he was peeking in Secsy's window the other night.. The way he was behaving, I really ought to report it to Elf Snugglebutt. I mean, first his eyes were popping almost out of his head, just like that elf Dobby in Harry Potter. And then his hands started making what looked like completely involuntary movements and his whole body went entirely rigid. I had to drag him out of there, and all the while he was muttering almost unintelligible words. The only word that did make a bit of sense was 'tits'. But somehow I don't think the blue tits or the great tits were out that time of the night?

I wish I could have seen what he saw, then I would be in a much better position to judge whether or not it's necessary to report the incident. I know, I should in fact report it to Elf Snugglebutt, but on the other hand I'd be sorry to grass on a mate. It's not the done thing, it just isn't. And nothing happened, he recovered his senses eventually. Never let on what he had seen, though. Drippynose is a mate, and I won't be the one betraying a mate. Nah... I won't tell her. She can figure it out for herself, that would be different, but she's not going to hear about it from me..

There, I feel better now that I've taken that decision! And speaking of Snugglebutt, I'd better go and take over, it must be time for my watch soon, anyway.

*Elf Droopydrawers wanders off into the night, still mumbling to himself

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: vectis
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 07:03 PM

The one that is easiest for yur elves and reindeer Santa. I would rather get it later in GB than not at all if it misses me in NZ. If you live down under it would probably get to NZ quicker and a lot more cheaply.

Does this mean I'm getting a pressie. WHHHEEEEEEEEE! :-D

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 03 Dec 07 - 07:24 PM

Haven't heard from my SS in awhile...
(Allison home from school on a snow day bored and restless...)

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: JennieG
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 01:28 AM

Santa I am being so good you wouldn't believe it!! The Opera House carpark is probably big enough for the sleigh and reindeer but you must remember it's underground, will that bother them? And it's not free either.

You are welcome to park in our driveway....it's not very big and already has 2 cars.....and the front lawn is taken up with the caravan.

Cheers
JennieG getting all breathless with anticipation although I have already had correspondence from a Friend of Santa in Denmark!

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 03:30 AM

Elf Droopydrawers - What Drippynose saw was totally innocent. I admit, I was looking at tits, but only to see if they were coping with the cold weather. Their pecker hasn't been used for some time and I needed to make sure it was still fit to eat.

Or it might have been me training robins to sit on pieces of coloured paper whilst I take pictures of them to use as greetings cards. It was all done very humanely (or robinely) and the only creature to suffer was the little pink worm used to coax the robin into position.

Any news on your Postal Elf yet? He didn't seem very happy a few posts up... perhaps he should get himself a Union Rep and some time off for work related, stress induced illness.

SECSY
LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Report to The Big Man from Snugglebutt
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 05:09 AM

THATS IT

NO MORE

Try putting me on a watchout with that pair of silly boys again and the entire girl elf population will be called out on strike and you know what that means. NO MORE HOT CHOCOLATE!!


Drippynose is silly beyond belief of course I know what Droopydrawers saw indeed I saw it myself he really has been away from the pole for to long. Mind you I didn't think a woman fondling a feeding log could have such an effect on a boy elf.

The cruelty to pink squirmy things was duely noted and reported but the Robin looked most happy to oblige by sitting still while she used the impograph. Imps down here must be an awful lot smaller than home or perhaps they have found some way of looking at the thing they are painting without actually having to be there because she came inside and attatched the little box to a bigger box and there was the robin nicely painted.

Next year do not send me to watch anyone who sews. I only sat down for a moment to rest dratted woman isn't fussy where she leaves her needle. Drippynose had to apply the plaster that blighter Droopydrawers could do nothing for rolling on the floor laughing it's a wonder he didn't wake Seccsy up.

Please Please Please let me come home now before i murder those two.

Yours Senior investigator Elf Snugglebutt

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: greg stephens
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 07:07 AM

Well, I'm not sure what these threads are for exactly, I've not been keeping up. But I can report, and I hope that this is the appropriate place, that Santa has delivered a mysterious parcel from our former colony in the Americas. So I have put it under the Christmas tree, or more accurately in the place that will be under the Christmas tree when we actually get a Christmas tree.Which will not be for a couple of weeks yet, however often they play Jingle Bells down in Sainsbury's.
Thank you Secret Santa, you can stop worrying about the postal service now.

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 10:24 AM

Look, I may not have been very kind to the pink squirmy thing but at least it died happy in that bottle of Tequila before I used it to tempt the red breasted bird.

Sorry about the needle.. I've been looking for that one for while. Watch out for the spray glue later.

SECSY
LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Megan L
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 03:24 PM

dear Santa Dauvitt is sucking a licorice pipe and dropping hints about how nice muffins taste :) the wandering elf has found its way onto the fridge beside the fishes.

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Greg Stephens' Secret Santa
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 04:40 PM

Thanks for posting about the Post!

Happy Holidays!

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Katlaughing's Secret Santa
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 04:44 PM

HO HO HO!
Your gift(s) are with the P.O.!

Open the package when it arrives, and go ahead and read the card - it has further instructions.

Hee hee! I mean, ho ho!

- Sanity Claus

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Vectisssss Santa of the Secret Kind.
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 05:27 PM

He He He Ho Ho Ho

I've been to see the lady at the GPO (showing my age here)




Can't do this poetry bo---x.

Pressy wing ing it's way to you.


Have your self a safe and wonderful time in New Zealand

Sotsk.

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Nancy King's santa
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 06:24 PM

I'm searching for presents
But not from this land
'Cos of duplicate pressies
Later, you'll understand!

So, fair lady Nancy
Watch our for Sir Claus
And a present from ******
Far from my new native shores

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,MeganL's Impish Secret Santa
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 06:44 PM

Megan, my Dear, that beady thing is whatever you chose it to be. If it will serve you for a necklace, go ahead and use it as one. I'm not sure exactly what it was originally intended for myself, you see. I'm only glad if you can find use for the little items I've selected for your pleasure!

Is your Dauvitt sucking licorice now? Has he worn out the dummy already? My, my, he must be more grumpy than men are most - and that's saying something. Maybe he can make you muffins while you fiddle with the peedie bits?

I hope you're still watching the mail, one of the elves was sent to the post office just recently.

MISS

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Peg Leg Pierce, Christmas Pirate
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 09:30 PM

Oy - Sarah!

Sorry to be so silent fer so longs. I bins out to sea, as pirates often arrrrrhh. bwahaha. So today I comes ashore with a box of pressies for ye and hands 'em off to some landlubber guy who says he signs them Customs declarations as "Desanta". I tells 'im to put my name onnit but when I calls 'im up to see iffin he don the deed proper, he brags that he went and signed the blasted paper as "Desanta" or maybe "D Santa" - I dunno. Stoopid landlubber.

Anyways - he swears on his mothers grave that the box is bound to arrive at yer office in 7 to 10 days so them pressies ought be in yer own hands no later than the 15th. If they ain't in yer hands by then must be that other pirates hijacked the plane! I woulda sent 'em by ship but seeing as some of them pressies are meant to be enjoyed afore Christmas so as to heighten the Yultide spirit n all, I couldn't risk lettin the box fall into enemy pirate hands and then me havin' ta negotiate their release and so on.

So - when ye gets yer pressie box - open it up. Any pressies resding therein which is not wrapped in green paper ais to be consumed and /or enjoyed promptly. Some assembly will be required for one of them. it is imperative that ye builds that thing afore Christmas day. Oh also inside is a thing ye has to leave out fer the real Santa man. No it's not milk an biscuits - thems ye has to come by on yer owns.

Sadly, I wasn't able to include and music discs things in the pressie box. Those to come later by ship. Christmas Pirate rules say I have until Epiphany to get ALL the pressies to your door. Now, are ye going to holiday away from the address I gots? iffin yes, ye may not gets the music dics pressies until after ye gets back from yer holiday.

I gots to shove out of port soon. That Desanta feller will get some other stuff to mail ta yez in a week or so. I'll be off to sea in another day or so so I hope yez be readin the thread.

Very truly Yours

Peg Leg Pierce
Christmas Pirate

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Nancy King
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 10:06 PM

Thanks for the message, Santa! Very tantalizing indeed!

Nancy

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,guest, Crystal's SSS
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 10:34 PM

Well, the SSSs here are just waitin and wonderin' if the package has arrived...we were hopin' the diamonds, emeralds and gold was not a little too much....if so, just pass it on....

Crystal's SSS........

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: katlaughing
Date: 04 Dec 07 - 11:10 PM

Oh, boy! I get to open it when it gets here?! Wow, THANK YEW, Santy!! I don't have to w-a-i-t!!! Yippee!

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Fran's secretive santa
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 08:49 AM

your pressie has left on it's long & convoluted journey.

eventually it will get to you (depending on the carriers).

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Mrs Cobble
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 09:07 AM

It turns out my Secret Santa is not who I thought it was. I cought postie elves with a package from Maryland. Thank you so much..... I will try to be good and save opening it at least until the yuletide. By the way the elves have been offered gainful employment looking for the Borrower types who may live arround our house causing many things to go missing. HeHeHe


Mrs C

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,JacquiC's Jocular, jaunty, joyous & jubilant
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 10:57 AM

I hope that you are still being as good as you know how Jacqui. Can you send your daughter's address to Liz please just in case I want to use it?
Off to feed the reindeer and sort out those pesky elves
Your own true and loving
Santa

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Ranger Steve's On-the-Ball Secret Santa
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 11:00 AM

Just wanted to let you know that the postal elves have taken your gift and are winging their way to New Jersey with it. Keep your eyes on the skies in the next couple of days! Ho Ho Ho

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Fran
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 11:02 AM

OOOOOh that's exciting, I will look out for it Santa! I have been very good as well. I can't have a tree up this year, two new kittens would make it a recipe for disaster, it will go upstairs out of the way until Christmas day though.

Thank you secret Santa!

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: Megan L
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 01:52 PM

Day five

Santa is ensuring that the frozen north gets a little warmer and cleaner this year. The socks will come in very usefull and I can throw the bath bombs at the spiders :)

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Katlaughing's Secret Santa
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 04:30 PM

Well, you get to open the package, and you get to open the card, and you get part of the prezzy right away, but for part you have to wait. Unless, like most Mudcats, you have some issues with authority....

HO HO HO!

Santy

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Fran's secretive santa
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 06:23 PM

a special pressie just for your new kittens.

Cat's Twelve Days of Christmas

On the first day of Christmas, my cat ruined for me - a brand new Christmas tree
On the second day of Christmas, my cat accompanied me - to the vet after eating all the frozen turkey
On the third day of Christmas, my cat wrecked for me - thirteen ornaments on my Christmas tree
On the fourth day of Christmas, my cat broke for me - a statue in my Lenox nativity
On the fifth day of Christmas, my cat scratched for me - the kid who collects for charity
On the sixth day of Christmas, my cat opened for me - the presents beneath my Christmas tree
On the seventh day of Christmas, my cat lost for me - the pearls I bought for Mary
On the eighth day of Christmas, my cat helped me - put the tinsel back on the tree
On the ninth day of Christmas, my cat destroyed for me - my Christmas card list by hitting the computer's delete key
On the tenth day of Christmas, my cat hid from me - the remote control from my TV
On the eleventh day of Christmas, my cat ate for me - the drumsticks off my turkey
On the twelfth day of Christmas my cat rested. And so, thank goodness, so did I.

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: katlaughing
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 07:37 PM

Issues with authority?! You mean as in one of my fav. bumper stickers Question Authority?!?!

Oh, no, I can be good, if I have to, esp. if I get to open the *teasers*!

Thank yew, thank yew, Santy! *skipping away in joy, laughing*

kat

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Mrs. Cobble's Staff-depleted Santa
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 10:55 PM

Knowing and seeing all when I have the time, I knew that you had briefly waylaid a few members of my delivery service. Suspicion was first aroused when they called in sick and the phone machine tape sounded like they were saying they'd "taken absinthe without leave". Is THAT what you gave them?

Anyway, if they're not back to work and ready for the next assignment by next Monday, you will have many more visitors who kick ass and take names when enforcing the International Fugitive Elf Laws as laid down by the Dreaded Scout Decision. Albyemeeze Elf and Besidemeeze Elf (They probably introduced themselves as Albie and Sid) have been bad little boys and will be dealt with in their own way and time, but let them moonlight for you for a few days in search of Borrowers, pairs of scissors and unmatched single socks, as they brought the delivery job in ahead of schedule. Any further tardiness, though, will NOT be condoned!

This from one who knows and sees all, and who will be closly monitoring videotape, AND who has the power to transform your precious pressie into something else entirely if crossed.

Watch out, don't cry, don't pout, and rest ye merry!

Santa

Subject: RE: BS: Secret Santa messages part two
From: GUEST,Not Leadfingers
Date: 05 Dec 07 - 10:59 PM

100