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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: VirginiaTam Date: 11 Mar 10 - 03:19 PM Mary... Didn't you fall down and get badly bruised last year? Seem to remember reading this on mudcat... or am I having deja view. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 11 Mar 10 - 03:43 PM On the ice in December or january. I forget. This time I just fell down. Very embarrassing. I was wearing shoes that don't support my ankle. It turned and I ended up on my face. I am joking about it but I really was very lucky not to end up in the ER. The head of HR saw me in the ladies room and was surprised that I had another cold. I replied that it was just a fall on my face caused by my problem drinking. Great lady - she laughed. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 11 Mar 10 - 03:59 PM Heheheheee. Cute. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 11 Mar 10 - 08:11 PM Better than that, as I walked away she quipped "I have the same problem" I responded and ran "We all worry about you, Linda." Cracked her up. She is on her way to Hawaii for a birthday and anniversary celebration. I hope she enjoys every minute - a really nice lady. My hand has swollen and turned a variety of shades of red and purple. Hurts like hell. The worst is trying to release the seatbelt on my car. Every finger hurts and the thumb has a nasty cut - I'll take some cheese with my wine. Did I mention that my nose is all scabby? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Severn Date: 12 Mar 10 - 12:53 AM InterVenus DeMilo is willing to part with Virginia Tam's legs but wants to keep the engagement ring. The already-married Virginia Tam has very generously agreed to part with the quite valuable but extra ring. "Ain't THAT big o' me!", says VT. Her husband is quite fond of the legs and has become quite attatched to them when they're attatched to her, but he DOES want her to keep the prosthetis tail around for the odd hot tub fantasy..... A crowd ofSpecialists has gathered around Ms. DeMilo to deternine how to remove the ring, and most are even examining the right pair of legs. A forfit of forefeet, that is to say the front two feet of her four feet, must be accomplished so that the removal of the ring is painless to both InterVenus AND VT, despite Nurse Ratched's protests. It's hard to tell what she wanted most, the ring or to witness the pain. Three doctors hold the leg while another pulls on the ring that's on a freshly greased toe. After four unsuccessful tries, with a loud POP, a ring from her toe then they most quick-i-lye drew and restored it to Ms. DeMilo while Nurse Ratched gave her a glare that could cook an ox. She'd better guard that ring closely while she's in the building. The four doctors heartily congradulated each other on a job well done and went down to a Doc-side bar to celebrate the large consulting fees they would all eventually collect. It took Drs. Fine and all three Howard brothers, Shemp having to have been called in from the West Coast. Ain't it GREAT to have Specialists!.... A note was handed to Nurse Ratched saying that her request for an orderly to remove everything from her locker and have it with fresh replacements had been successfully carried out. InterVenus DeMilo gets a message from her insurance provider, Allstate, promising her good hands. Herman decline's The Squid's challenge of a best-of-ten arm wrestling match, reminding him that InterVenus DeMilo had originally lost both of her arms in a wrestling match to win a brown-eyed handsome man. Most of the gang goes off to check out SINSULL'S JD-IV and cheer her up. We leave VT alone with her husband, and they goes home, her tail wagging behind her. Severn looks at Nurse Mary Ellen Cauterize and then at InterVenus, thinking, "Decisions, decisions......". Could things actually be back to normal?.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: VirginiaTam Date: 12 Mar 10 - 02:33 AM TSO... says that would be a VERY odd hot tub. Hey these legs don't hurt so much any more. Thanks Venus, you must've worked the kinks out! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Liz the Squeak Date: 12 Mar 10 - 03:00 AM Meanwhile, LTS is left forlornly holding her bucket and thinking - is the hassle of re- re-scheduling a visit to HR worth leaving my nice warm bed - now that I've finally got it warm.... Why is the universe so perverse that when every other woman around my age gets hot flashes, I get cold ones?! And why is there a bald man under my bed? You knows I likes 'em hairy....! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 12 Mar 10 - 09:23 AM And so go the days of our lives... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Severn Date: 12 Mar 10 - 11:25 AM There is a loud shriek from the shower as Nurse Ratched finds that all her hair is falling out from her shampoo. She quickly throws on some fresh clothes (with an extra large nurse's cap) and is halfway down the hallway when she finds herself itching like crazy and scratching like a hound. It seems that the orderly sent to replace the contents of her locker was a certain Native American .Nurse Ratched has to go back to the shower, turn on the hot water and turn the shower room into a sauna to open up her pores and enable herself to rid herself of the insulation. This buys enough time for Running Sore to make his getaway. "Sauna of a bitch!I've found a new way to do MY scalping.", he laughs to himself as he crawls out from under Liz's bed and after giving her a quick apology, leaves on the run. He has applied for emergency leave and has plane reservations to Oklahoma where he has reservations at a reservaton and no reservations about having to flee the horse-spittle. Within the half hour, he is on a plane and gone. "It'll be good", he thinks to himself, "to get back to his dear old home at Teepee 109.". The Great Spirit only knows if we'll ever see him again. Alas, Liz, another one's gotten away.... Ratched corners Lily Festre, and after getting the name of a few shops, goes off to become a wig-ed witch. "There'll be the devil to pay!", Nurse Ratched snarls. "There'll be the she-devil toupee", thinks Severn, but keeps it to himself until he's sure that the angry bald nurse is out of the building. Nobody's looking forward to the next few weeks with Ratched, as having been successfully trumped on both the ring and the scalping, she is liable to be inspired to new heights of cruelty. I wonder who our next orderly will be?..... I hope everybody's faring well in their recoveries..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 12 Mar 10 - 11:56 AM Hari Kari, the new Indian orderly, walks smartly out the HR office thrilled that he has finally landed a paying job. He tucks his Tandoori Chicken and Goat Curry lunch away in the hemotology fridge, chains his elephant to his locker and goes off in search of the head nurse to report for duty. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 12 Mar 10 - 12:28 PM He got a job from the Head Nurse? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 12 Mar 10 - 12:40 PM Keep that up, gnu, and you will be spending the rest of this thread on the Tiger Woods Alternative Therapy Floor. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 12 Mar 10 - 12:50 PM No need to Escalade anything. It was just a joke. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: VirginiaTam Date: 12 Mar 10 - 03:35 PM SCRREEEEEECCCHHHH ssmmasshhhh tinkle THUMP HELP! My tail got in the way of TSO's view, it doesn't fit well into the car and well... It's Nurse Ratched... We accidentally hit her.. and GOD! It is awful. Her hair went flying off and a little wiener dog snatched it and ran off with it. Ratched is alive, but she just moaning and lying there. Somebody please help. I am afraid the poor little wiener dog might chew up her hair and get sick. We gotta find him. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 12 Mar 10 - 03:41 PM (ASIDE)Does this mean that we get to take care of Ratched? Colonoscopies and all? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Severn Date: 13 Mar 10 - 02:48 AM Wiener take all? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 14 Mar 10 - 07:17 PM I am preparing for my scope in the AM. I may need some TLC on the morrow. Be apprised that I may be even more of a pain than usual. Yes, hard to believe but true. In anticipation, don't piss me off. I assume the hospital staff here, who seem to excel at it, will do that well enough, as has been my fortune over the past years. Free health care in Canada? Yeah... every time I go in, they make me pay with incompetence and indifference and unprofessionalism. Sorry for the ween, but I just... have been there and done that, more than once, and I am not looking forward to the morrow with anything less than trepidation. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 15 Mar 10 - 10:13 AM Doc said things "looked good". Followup when the test results are back. Now if I could just get to see an ENT. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 15 Mar 10 - 11:11 AM In my experience, the preparation for a colonoscopy is far worse than the procedure itself. Last time I was out cold before the doctor came in. Woke up degassed and ready to go home. Strange to wake up in a roomful of people farting loudly and one poor guy who couldn't. He was hurting. Hope all is well, gnu. How long a wait for an ENT? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 15 Mar 10 - 11:24 AM SINS... This was the otherendoscope. ENT, since July 13. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: maeve Date: 15 Mar 10 - 11:27 AM High time and beyond for the referral to come through. Hang in there, gnu. maeve |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Liz the Squeak Date: 15 Mar 10 - 12:36 PM And pray you don't get the same camera! LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 15 Mar 10 - 01:42 PM I was rather remiss when I found out he was doing innuendoscopes this morning also. I coulda got a two-for-one! I mean, I had to be there anyway. Hehehee... the prep nurse jabbed the IV in the crook of my left elbow and said, "Oh dear." I said, "We just met." She had a foul look on her face and said, "I can't see valves and I can't feel valves... I can only find them." She tried pumping some saline in to see if she could get a flow. Then she looked at the back of my right hand and said, "That looks like a good one." Worked a treat. I have two nice bruises. Small spuds, but when it's not necessary... you know. The exam room nurse, Clara Voyant, asked me if I enjoyed the final Brier game last night. I looked surprised and then puzzled when I said yes. She said, "Oh. I can smell beer on anyone who has had even one in the last 24 hours. I was a triage nurse for 27 years." The doc told me to open wide and said, "The only way to describe the taste of this numbing spray is skunk piss." Then Clara says, "He's used to skunk piss." How did she know I was drinking Bud while watching the curling game? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Liz the Squeak Date: 15 Mar 10 - 05:53 PM The Cardiac Nurse, Ann Gina has been round. Still no news but her name has been mentioned in passing... LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 18 Mar 10 - 05:49 PM Jeepers. My left elbow can bend without discomfort today. The bruise is 4" by 3" and purple. What the hell kinda valve did Heather find? Hmmm... blooming Heather? Yeah... small spuds, but i need sommat to wine about. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 19 Mar 10 - 03:36 PM Are you all talking in code? I only understand every third word. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: VirginiaTam Date: 25 Mar 10 - 06:02 PM I need my legs removed again please... not only do they ache internally, now they are covered in hives. Well I say now it's been a month and getting worse daily. E45 cream burns like fire. Benadryl not working either. arrrgghh.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Liz the Squeak Date: 25 Mar 10 - 10:14 PM MR Myocardial perfusion scan on Wednesday 24th.... the staff and the hospital were as nice as could be but oh, it was an awful experience.... Got there early to find it was all closed so had a panic thinking I was at the wrong place... Anyway.. was taken in and up to the scanner, made to undress (and even going private I STILL get the gown with only one tie), then had canulars put in so they could inject various drugs and stuff. Of course, they couldn't find a vein in my arm so I had them in both hands. That's me immobilised. Why do they do that and THEN ask you to sign the forms? So.. taken to the scanner, strapped down to the table (I know, people pay good money for treatment like that) and sent into the scanner with the headphones on (bring your own CD, I chose Schiedt) and spent best part of an hour alternately holding my breath and deep breathing whilst the gubbins took pictures. That bit wasn't too bad apart from the claustraphobic effect of the tunnel, but worse was to come. I got injected with a drug to simulate running around the park. Now, apparently one in 250 people have a strange reaction to this drug... Guess who that one is. It was awful, like someone was sitting on my chest and being unable to breathe, legs like lead and sharp pains. Still, I bravely struggled on for the 3 hours (in reality less than 5 minutes) it took and then the dye went in. That was disconcerting as it was very cold and I could feel it circulating! So... they took more pictures, I had to hold my breath a lot, then they let me out. It took a while before I was apparently pink enough to be allowed to sit up, and there were some strange effects. Took even longer (about an hour, a pint of water, a bacon butty, 2 hot chocolates and a bag of crisps) before I could face the journey home. So there we go. I took the slow way home on the bus, because it's easier to get off and throw up than on the Underground... I got home after a 3 hour journey (it usually takes 1 by train, 2 by bus) where I fell asleep on the cat. A picture was taken of me asleep on the cat, and I'm stunned by how grey I still looked. No wonder they wouldn't let me go until I was pink. If that was pink, what the hell was I like before?! Anyway, after 48 hrs I'm much improved but still dog tired. They gave me a CD of the scan, and if you play it on the computer, with music in the background, you can make my ventricles "sing" along by scrolling quickly between frames! I have to call for an appointment for the results, nothing has been said about any possible causes for my problems (other than stress, surprise surprise), so I look forward to finding out what they found. So... more chocolate please nurse, and let me sleep a bit longer. LTS |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Severn Date: 26 Apr 10 - 12:29 AM I will be going back into Johns Hopkins Baltimore Bayview burn center on May 3rd for 5-10 days while they do skin grafte and a Z-Plasty to restore, hopefully, full range of motion to my left arm and shoulder. I'll have to work through therapy to stretch out the muscles, but I'll have more skin room to do it in, which should make it a much easier task. The say I will have to wear a removable arm brace (taken off for driving, bathing etc.) full time for 6 weeks afterwards and only at night the next six weeks. I'll be operated on my Dr. Milner, who was responsable for some of the original skin graft work done on me. He did a good job then, and I trust him. I was originally supposed to go in on the %th, which would have made for a round of "Cinco de Mayo Clinic" jokes, but now we'll have to hold the Mayo instead, at least until I've mustard enough strength to ketchup with things, something I don't especially relish. Wish me luck! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 26 Apr 10 - 06:06 AM GOOD LUCK Sev!!! |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: maeve Date: 26 Apr 10 - 08:31 AM Hot dog, Severn! At least the weather won't be too chili when you begin the smorgasbord. With a good doctor and more-than-skin-deep humor you'll skin the cat and stretch your horizons. With prayer, laughter, and my condiments, maeve |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Catherine Jayne Date: 26 Apr 10 - 08:32 AM And Good Luck Severn from me too!! Love Khatt x |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 26 Apr 10 - 09:50 AM Good luck, Sev. You have the best care available. I don't envy you the therapy but it will give you more movement. Hang in there, guy. How long will you be in the hospital? Any idea? Mary |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: VirginiaTam Date: 26 Apr 10 - 02:52 PM good thoughts going out to you Severn and to the medicals looking after you. Maeve beat me to "with my condiments" |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Severn Date: 26 Apr 10 - 02:59 PM Somewhere between 5 and ten days, Mary, with probably at least one painful follow-up appointment if there are staples or sutures to be removed, which someone will have to drive me to, as I'll have to take some heavy duty pain meds in advance. But now I'll have some skin room to stretch out those muscles. It'll be a bit of work, but hopefully worth it all and enable me to live and work somewhat, like a human being again. I'm not sure where they're taking the skin grafts from this time and what pain and problems the donor sites themselves will cause. Not much skin will be used, though. A WHOLE LOT was used last time, making me a lot slower in being able to get up from a crouching, squatting or kneeling position making gardening. assembling shelves etc.a bit painful. Life will go on, but It will definitely go on hurting..... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Sandra in Sydney Date: 29 Apr 10 - 07:31 AM sending slightly belated good wishes. sandra (back courtesy of a new modem after a week off line) |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Severn Date: 29 Apr 10 - 10:31 PM I got a phone call from the GP today saying that Wednesday's pre-op bloodwork showed a low platelet count. I fast again tonight and go back in tomorrow morning for another test. If my platelet count still proves low, the surgery date would be pushed back until I could get a cuple more units of fresh blood. If not, I go in as scheduled on Monday. A quart low again! The story of my life.....(sigh!). Lots on my plate, but not enough for my platelets.... Updates forthcoming when available.... |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: maeve Date: 30 Apr 10 - 05:56 AM Watching this space for your updates, Sev. maeve |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 30 Apr 10 - 10:03 AM Got my fingers crossed. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 30 Apr 10 - 01:47 PM Good luck, Sev. Hang in there. Mary |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: VirginiaTam Date: 30 Apr 10 - 02:01 PM yeah.. buck man... you must be a bit down cuz it's showing in the degradation of your talent for punning. we count on those groaners. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: wysiwyg Date: 30 Apr 10 - 02:12 PM I'm in, now-- for cardiac rehab-- and I sure hope this time I get to keep my head!!! ~S~ |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 30 Apr 10 - 03:15 PM Why do my posts keep disappearing? Oh well... My fingers are getting sore. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Severn Date: 30 Apr 10 - 04:35 PM I've been cleared to go. It's on for Monday 3rd 5:30 in the morning at Hopkins Baltimore Bayview. I'm the first victim of the day. I have to do a complete fast as of midnight Sunday. No water. No nuthin! My sister will drive me in. I don't know yet when I'll come back. Thanks for all good wishes. I'll try to find a way to get back to you all. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 30 Apr 10 - 05:01 PM I'll have everything crossed for you buddy. Good luck to one of the kindest and generous men I have ever had the privilege to know. Yeah... I know that sounds sappy, but it's the truth. Never find a nicer gentleman than Sev. Ya just won't. Hope to hear from you soon with good reports. |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: Sandra in Sydney Date: 01 May 10 - 08:16 AM joining the crowd waiting for news sandra |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: gnu Date: 12 May 10 - 02:18 PM C'mon Sev.... what's the scoop? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 13 May 10 - 11:52 AM Two weeks Sev. Do we need to send Ratched after you? Or is she there supervising your PT? Mary |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: SINSULL Date: 14 May 10 - 09:31 AM Sev - I saw you in Robyn's thread. What up? |
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Subject: RE: BS: Mudcat Recovery Ward 2010 From: VirginiaTam Date: 14 May 10 - 10:15 AM yeah really... let's get Ratched, cuz not knowing is making me wretched. If you don't want to see the nurse, please return with your punning verse. |
