BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.

Subject: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 07:51 PM

If you have anything you want to bring up, this is the thread for it.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: skipy
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 07:52 PM

Double standards!
Skipy

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Bert
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 07:54 PM

Aren't you ashamed of yourself, think of all those poor little puppies who are now going to get named Playdo!!!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 07:55 PM

Fi on you, Bert.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 07:55 PM

However, I see the thread is in good hands. I gotta get. Night all.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 07:58 PM

But seriously Bert, it's the dog's cousin Dil I have concerns for . . . .

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Severn
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 07:59 PM

We used to make busts of Socrates from Play Doh! After a few bottles of Play Tonic, we could relate to it all.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Azizi
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 08:17 PM

Another word for "puke" is "upchuck". I like the word "upchuck" better than the word "puke". And I really don't like another word that means the same thing-"vomit".

But then again, you probably couldn't make as good a rhyme with the word "upchuck" as you can with the word "vomit". For example, here's a repost from the classic Mudcat thread thread.cfm?threadid=2998#1457484
"Naughty kids' greatest hits II" :

Subject: RE: Naughty kids' greatest hits II
From: GUEST,loreshdw - PM
Date: 12 Apr 05 - 03:43 PM

I don't remember all of the "Comet" song, but here's a little bit:

comet
it tastes like gas-o-line
comet
it makes your mouth turn green
comet
it makes you vomit
so have some comet
and vomit
today!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Azizi
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 08:19 PM

Probably the most famous upchucker of them all was Dubya's dad who lost it at a formal dinner in Japan, I think it was.

How embarrassing for him! How yuccky for everyone else that was there. I bet no one felt like eating after that.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Emma B
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 08:21 PM

Azizi, 'Chuck' can be a term of endearment in the UK

The expression 'What's up chuck?' means something a little different here :)

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Azizi
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 08:22 PM

Oh my!

English is so contextual.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Azizi
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 08:24 PM

But as long as it's between consenting adults, it's none of my business.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Severn
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 08:30 PM

How come nobody ever talke of merely "gurgitating"? They only have the Urge to Regurge As someone who's having to take some anti Gnaws-Ya meds, I need to know!

Prepare to be RePuked Ye Sinners!

"I Been Puked, Hence I Been Scorned!"

A Brazilian friend once told me they had experssions down there that roughly translate to "laughing at the rug" and "Laughing in your oatmeal"

Barf?

Ralph?

Spit up?


All in one's upbringing, I guess.......

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Azizi
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 08:34 PM

Ralph??

That's a new one on me.

On second thought, maybe I should rephrase that, since I definitely don't want Ralph on me...

Umm...

Nevermind.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Severn
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 08:51 PM

Ralph would be the nadir, Azizi?

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Joe_F
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 09:04 PM

My father was in the navy in W.W. I. He spent most of his time as an engineer in a shipyard, but they made him go to sea one time. While he was retching pretty violently at the rail, a Real Sailor came up & said "If you feel something hairy & round come up, swallow it quick. That'll be your asshole."

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Azizi
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 09:18 PM

Ralph would be the nadir, Azizi?

Are you talking astrologese, Severn?

"Nadir: The second of the four major compass points of the horoscope, situated on the meridian near the cusp of the 4th House."
http://en.mimi.hu/astrology/nadir.html

But my nadir is "Sagittarius" and not "Ralph". As a matter of fact, I there's no astrology sign or planet named "Ralph" that I know of-at least not yet.

Come to think of it, I've only known one man named Ralph. And I've not known any women with that name at all, which isn't surprising since it is a male name.

Btw, "Ralph" is an old English name which means "wolf counsel".
I think that was a compliment.

I could move on to another subject in a stream of consciousness way. But I think I'll exit, stage right.

'Night all!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Greg B
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 09:20 PM

I was sitting by the surf
With a mate of mine named Murf
With a bucketful of prawns upon me knee (me knee)
When I'd swallowed the last prawn
I'd a Technicolor yawn
And I chundered in the old Pacific Sea

Drink it up (chug a lug chug a lug)
Drink it up (chug a lug chug a lug)
'Av a 'nother dozen tubes or two with me (with me)
And if you must shoot yer voice, mate
You 'aven't any choice
But to chunder in the old Pacific Sea

I've had liquid-laughs in bars
and I've hurled from moving cars
I've chundered where and when it pleases me (pleases me)
But if I could choose my spot
to regurgitate my lot
then I'd chunder in the old Pacific Sea

Drink it up...

But now I'm over here
I drink this old Budweiser beer
It tastes so weak, the outter sell it free (sell it free)
I sent some over home, the buggers couldn't stand the foam
And they chundered in the old Pacific sea

Drink it up...

====================================

There's some that's bound for New York Town
And some that's bound for France
HEAVE AWAY ME JOHNNIES...

=====================================

Let's all shout for Huey!
Where can Huey be?...

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 09:39 PM

What, no mention of carrots? But I don't understand.

Subject: RE: BS: Pro or Anti- Puke-ular--thoughts needed, .
From: Severn
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 09:48 PM

It's YOUR thread, Bruce! It's up to you to dangle them infront of us as an incentive. About 24 of them might supply enough "gold" to do the trick!

I actually like carrots, even after growing up with all the standard redhead jokes! Someone should mention LIVER! Can't get the stuff down, much less KEEP it there!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Severn
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 09:51 PM

Bruce, You treat carrots like they were the original "Agent Orange".

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 09:55 PM

You are BAD, Severn, BAD.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: john f weldon
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 10:00 PM

Obviously nothing on this thread is going to be in good taste, so I will quote a friend who was taken up in a jet fighter by a pilot who decided to give him a real "thrill ride."
He was, of course, wearing an oxygen mask.

His words:
"I ate the same breakfast seven times."

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Nancy King
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 10:00 PM

A friend of mine used to refer to "driving the porcelain bus."

Subject: RE: BS: Pucks--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Severn
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 10:12 PM

Nicest thing anyone's said to me all week, Bruce! I assume you, like John Lee Hooker, are talking as in "like Jesse James"!

My red headed sister Caroline was called "Carrot" as a kid. A whole lot better than if I'd had a sister Olivia nicknamed "Liver"

On the Porcelain end of the subject, though, I actually was in back of a truck in traffic yesterday that said, "John C. Flood-Plumbing".
Some people are born to their professions. After all, one of my favorite American Civil War historians is named Wiley Sword.....



......but I digress......

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Sorcha
Date: 18 Dec 07 - 11:27 PM

Hey, I LIKE liver!!!! Now, cherry pie the wrong way and thru your nose...that HURTS. Took me years to be able to eat cherry pie again.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: frogprince
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 12:17 AM

I served a hitch in the Navy, but fortunately happened to do little sailing. When I did, I was often one of the guys at the rail "looking for O'Rourke".

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,Bardford
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 12:28 AM

From Spinal Tap (the movie):


--- The Thamesmen play Gimme Some Money ---      
--- British TV: Pop, Look & Listen 1965 ---

Marty:    Your first drummer was uh....
Nigel:    The peeper....
David:    Joe stumpy Pepys...great great...uh...tall blond geek..
           with glasses uh...
Nigel:    Uh.. good drummer.
David:    Great look, good drummer.
Nigel:    Good, good drummer....
David:    Fine drummer....
Marty:    What happened to him?
David:    He died, he, he died in a bizarre gardening accident some
           years back.
Nigel:    It was really one of those things...it was...you know...the
           authorities said...you know...well best leave it unsolved,   
          really...you know.
Marty:    And he was replaced by...uh....
David:    Stumpy Joe - Eric Stumpy Joe Childs.
Marty:    What happened to Stumpy Joe?
Derek:    Well, uh, it's not a very pleasant story..but, uh,
David:    He's passed on.
Derek:    he died. uh...he choked on..the ac- the official explanation
           was he choked on vomit.
Nigel:    It was actually, was actually someone else's vomit.
           It's not....
David:    It's ugly.
Nigel:    You know. There's no real....
Derek:    You know they can't prove whose vomit it was...they don't   
           have the facilities at Scotland Yard....
David:    You can't print, there's no way to print a spectra-photograph
Nigel:    You can't really dust for vomit.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,LTS pretending to work
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 03:09 AM

A friend used to say he had two long lost brothers who, in the manner of dead goldfish had been flushed down the loo. His father regretted flushing them and was often heard, late on a Saturday night, calling for them by name. They were called Ralph and Hughie.

Puke is a good English word, supposedly invented by William Shakespeare - it appears in his 'seven ages of man' bit (can't remember where from, at work so can't check) where man appears as a baby 'mewling and puking in its mothers arms'.

It's also the name of one of Gerald Durrells' dogs when he lived on Corfu as a boy. He'd been given two puppies for his birthday who had then been put in a side room to settle in, with some food and water. When the party expanded, they opened up the side room to find evidence that the dogs had enjoyed both. Hence they were named Widdle and Puke.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: gnu
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 03:33 AM

Azizi... "Probably the most famous upchucker of them all was Dubya's dad who lost it at a formal dinner in Japan, I think it was."

They had that on all the TV news for days, but did not report that he puked again, an hour later.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: JennieG
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 05:45 AM

Oysters.........nooooo.

Brings back nasty memories (as well as the oysters)

Cheers
JennieG

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 06:03 AM

GregB

There are other extra words for the song "And they chundered in the old Pacific sea" - I have heard them in Brisbane. I did start a request thread ages ago...

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 06:12 AM

Well, I think there must be some sort of telepathy going back and forth across the ocean. I woke up this morning having dreamt that I'd eaten and swallowed one mouthful of a sandwich which had bad meat in it. As soon as I realised (in the dream) I threw the rest away but decided I could still taste it once I was awake! I felt positively ill ......... and then find this thread!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: fat B****rd
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 06:49 AM

May I bring up a crate of Guinness ?

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: theleveller
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 07:16 AM

The Australians do it with so much style (probably because they've had a lot of practice), hence the expressions 'groan down the big white phone' or 'pebbledash the porcelain'.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 07:39 AM

The favourite word for vomiting, hereabouts is "honk".

Possibly from the call of seals ?

Heigh ho |(heave ho).

Bryn

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Severn
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 08:25 AM

In the US, to "honk" is to blow your nose loudly. Espicially if you love Jesus!

Also used to describe a world class snore.


But I'm just some dumb Honkey, so what do I know?.......


Happy Honk-A, folks!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Mr Happy
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 08:47 AM

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emetophobia

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Jean(eanjay)
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 08:50 AM

If I'm feeling obnoxious I'll say puke or throw up. If I'm in a ladylike mood I'll say feel sickly or a feeling of nausea. If I'm in matter of fact mode I'll use vomit.

It really depends how revolting I want to be!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: john f weldon
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 09:01 AM

Sounds like a good bumper sticker:
"Barf if you love Jesus"

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 09:21 AM

On an off-shore fishing boat my wife and I became quite "mal de mare". I was quite violent about it, so much so that I broke small veins in both eyes and turned them quite red around the blue eyeballs.

Now, this isn't a serious condition to the person who has it (usually). And I was wearing flip-up sunglasses at the time. I could mention the Evil Eye and s-l-o-w-l-y flip up the sunglasses, leaving the person to whom I was talking to deal with two red eyes.

Eventually the red (the injury is on the order of a bruise) turned yellow, another cool color for eyes. Then it faded and disappeared.

But it was fun while it lasted.

(Yes, I did go see the ophthalmologist as soon as possible after the injury.)

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 09:51 AM

Well, I don't know too much about puke, but I do know that projectile vomiting and a 104 fever means you don't feel very good.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: john f weldon
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 09:53 AM

For some reason I haven't barfed very often in the last 20 years.
Not the result of wholesome living, I'm afraid.
But, y'know... ...I don't miss it.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: topical tom
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 10:48 AM

Wow!What a thread to "bring up", so to speak.I like the expression
"hurled".It sounds as though I took part in an athletic competition, though the distance I covered was not enough to win any award.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: bobad
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 10:50 AM

Hurled chunks has a nice ring to it.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 10:51 AM

I liked the expression, "Ralphed." But at the time he was Premiere of Alberta. And it was apt.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Becca72
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 10:55 AM

I think my favorite expression for it is "Technicolor burp". We also used 'toss your cookies' 'hurl', 'ralph', 'chunk', 'yak' and many more I can't think of right now.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: frogprince
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 11:02 AM

At the risk of being semi-serious, can you think of anything else that's as far from fun to do, but which it's as important to be able to do sometimes?

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 11:05 AM

Yes. But it's too gross for this thread.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: john f weldon
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 11:50 AM

Let me guess;
what will Peace's NEXT thread be?

(He is 666, after all!)

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: theleveller
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 12:14 PM

Which brings us to the question that has perplexed mankind since time immemorial - why are there always carrots in it?

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 01:07 PM

Get a couple friends. Put some warm stew in a bladder or plastic bag, sticking the bag under your shirt and the opening up near your collar. Go to a bar with your friends. Have a beer and when you finish say, "I...I don't feel so good" and squeeze the bag or bladder so warm stew cascades all over the bar. At this point your friends must pull out spoons and start eating the stew spew. Usually this will clear out the bar and the barkeep may well punch you in the nose.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Greg B
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 01:19 PM

Found this variant, attributed to the Grateful Dead under
the name 'Bondi Pier'

I was down by Bondi Pier,
drinkin' tubes of ice cold beer,
With a bucket full of prawns upon my knee,
When I swallowed the last prawn,
I had a technicolor yawn and I chundered in the old Pacific Sea.

Drink it up,
drink it up,
crack another dozen tubes and prawns with me,
If you want to throw your voice, mate you won't have any choice,
But to chunder in the Old Pacific Sea.

I was sittin in the surf, when a mate of mine called Murf,
Asks if he can crack a tube or two with me.
The bastard barely swallowed it,
When he went for the big split,
and he chundered in the Old Pacific Sea.

I've had liquid laughs in cars,
and I've hurled from moving cars,
And I've chuckled when and where it suited me.
But if I could choose the spot, To regurgitate me lot,
then I'd chunder in the Old Pacific Sea. D

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,Jim Dixon
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 01:59 PM

There are two Renaissance Festival performers--Mark Sieve and Joe Kudla--who go by the names Puke 'n Snot. They've been doing their schtick for years, almost as long as Renaissance Festivals have existed, and are quite successful at it.

Their web site: http://www.magaga.com/home.html

I think you can find some of their performances on YouTube.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 03:21 PM

My youngest brother, a drama major, showed me this one:

Take a piece of yellow legal pad paper (14" long, for those who don't know) and tear a strip about 1/8" wide off of the long side. Accordion pleat it and put it up your nose. At some appropriate moment (e.g., sitting under the pulpit during the sermon, ordering in a fancy restaurant, saying goodnight after a hot date) grab the end of the paper rip the whole 14" out in one quick pull and throw it behind you. Make some appropriate comment if you wish.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 04:03 PM

If it's a seafood restaurant you could always say, "I thought it was oyster, but it's not."

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 05:21 PM

To person being seasick:

'Weak stomach?'

'No, I'm chucking it as far as I can'...


I used to babysit a girl who could hit a TV screen at 8 paces and another who would do it to order, just to get her own way...

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Becca72
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 05:24 PM

When I was a child I had a favorite doll (the name of which I can't remember). The typical babydoll you would feed water to, but this one was special. After you gave her the water you could squeeze her stomach 4 times and she would "ahh, ahh, ahh, CHOOO" and the water you'd just given her would come out her nose like snot. None of my friends had this particular doll for some reason....

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Rapparee
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 05:34 PM

Is anyone interested in starting a Mudcat Singalong and Projectile Vomiting Group?

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Azizi
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 07:29 PM

Is anyone interested in starting a Mudcat Singalong and Projectile Vomiting Group?

NO.

But some songs make me wanna throw up, like

"Here's a little song I wrote
I like to sing it note by note.
Don't worry. Be Happy"

-snip-

And there's

"When the Red, Red Robin Comes Bob-Bob Bobbin' Along
When the red, red robin comes bob, bob, bobbin' along, along
There'll be no more sobbin' when he starts throbbin' his old sweet song
Wake up, wake up you sleepy head
Get up, get out of your bed
Cheer up, cheer up the sun is red
Live, love, laugh and be happy..."

-snip-

What do these two songs have in common?

Barfibility

I hate it when people tell me I have to be happy!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: bobad
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 07:48 PM

"Is anyone interested in starting a Mudcat Singalong and Projectile Vomiting Group?"

Okay everyone get into a circle and a one and a two........

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Joe_F
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 08:05 PM

Once, after a bachelor party, a friend recalled that a certain young man had gotten so drunk he had "almost lost his Chinese". My first thought was that losing the ability to speak Chinese was an odd & unlikely effect of alcohol, but it turned out to refer to the Chinese takeout food that had been provided.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: john f weldon
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 08:42 PM

Um... ...when we were talking about piss, there were many and interesting actual uses for piss. For example, it works well for potters when wedging clay.

But, I haven't seen a lot of truly practical uses for puke.

is it possible that this substance is actually without value? Can anything be truly valueless? Help me, oh wise ones of Mudcat! Everything must have some sweet virtue!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Azizi
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 09:03 PM

The value of puke:

It cleans out your system.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 09:29 PM

If it weren't for puke it would be exceedingly difficult to describe the flavor of a mango or papaya.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: catspaw49
Date: 19 Dec 07 - 09:50 PM

At the risk of screwing up whatever is left of your miserable lives, I relate this tale which you will always remember. No need to thank me.

I'm about 12 and at church summer camp, a two week summer ritual from the time I was 10 til I was 17. Tommy Young is sitting across from me at lunch and when some kid says something about the food making him want to blow lunch, Tommy uttered the words that flash into my mind EVERYTIME I have prayed to the porcelain god for the past 47 gawddamn years:

"I got dibs on the big chunks!"

I saw Tommy about 5 years back, first time since we graduated from high school. First thing I did was call him a sunnavabitch for that remark so many years before. He was impressed he'd had so much effect on my life..LOL

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: gnu
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 04:53 AM

I recall... blow chunks, toss yer cookies, technicolour yawn (Becca reminded me), making a call on the great white telephone, heave... in residence at Uni, we had a "Woof of the Week" award prominently displayed, with pics sometimes. (To remove it was a cardianl sin.)

My own (near as I know)... doin the John yawn, feedin the dog, he was talkin ta god last night, Blairin (per Linda in "The Exorcist"), terfin surf, squidin (ye landlockers might hafta look that one up).

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: gnu
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 05:05 AM

Gee... I just tried to look it up. I could not find it. I found out that Sea Cucumbers puke their innards out when threatened, but, according to what I read, not squid. They do the ink thing only.

My apologies.

But, if ya ever go squid jiggin, ya might catch a few that... nevermind.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 05:22 AM

"Here's a little song I wrote
I like to sing it note by note.
Don't worry. Be Happy"

I do believe the singer suicided. Says it all, really.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,LTS pretending to work
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 05:23 AM

Oh thank you, Spaw... thank you so much.

Dibs on the big chunks.. THAT'S gonna stick in my brain now...

There are three uses for puke that I know of.

1) to make others also barf in sympathy.
2) to cleanse the system of substances detrimental to normal good health.
3) to feed pigeons.

Now you know why I hate pigeons so much.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 06:30 AM

Barry Humphries (Dame Edna) was banned from Quantas. He took a small can of fruit salad and a spoon with him, then proceeded to eat it from the airsick bag.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: gnu
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 06:42 AM

Now, normally, I find such pranks disgusting and childish, but, Robin, I am still laughing as I type!

Liz... pigeons are rats with wings. I had to clean out pigeon nests and droppings in the eaves and trim of old houses as a young lad new to the renovation and construction trades. The shit and the lice made me, you know....

And, when it was windy, I had to clean the sides and windows of old houses until I became accustomed to the vile job. Ever try climbing down a slippery ladder?

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Azizi
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 07:47 AM

Urban Legend Alert!

"Don't Worry Be Happy" songfacts:

"There were rumors that McFerrin attempted suicide after doing this song, and they are not true. However the rumors became so strong that even to this day people think Bobby is dead. This is untrue, he is alive and well".

http://www.songfacts.com/detail.php?id=5362

**

Urban legends make me puke.

And those rural legends are even worse.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Rapparee
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 08:03 AM

I'll post some good rural legends when I get to DC. Like the one about the traveling salesman and the farmer's child.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,Black Hawk on works PC
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 09:15 AM

Shouted quickly ;_

'Mammy,mammy - get me a spoon quick!
Grandma's been sick and grandads getting all the big lumps!'

Old playground cry to shock passing adults.(UK)

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Becca72
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 10:11 AM

"dibs on the big chunks" was a common response to "I'm gonna puke" when I was a kid. Spaw, did your friend make his way east and multiply?

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 10:22 AM

I don't wanna contribute to thread drift, never having done that in the past, but did any of you ever hear the booger thing? "Trade you a hard center for a soft center"? The 'dibs on the big chunks' remark reminded me of that. I did once ask a fellow if I could have the red peppers, and his response was NOT at all dignified. Man, there's lots of very sick people on this thread.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Bat Goddess
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 11:29 AM

spew
ralph (1st expulsion) followed by o'rourke (2nd expulsion)

Ever since childhood i've really disliked puking or vomiting. (I guess we were taught vomit was more 'polite' than the word vomit.

I think I tend to use the word barf most,

Whatever I call it, I'll go through great effort to avoid it even though I know I'll most likely feel better afterwards. Might, too, have something to do (at least for the past 27 years) with having a composting toilet.

We played a gig some years ago at a coastal cruise on the M/V Thomas Laighton for the Friends of Odiorne. Sea was rougher than optimal & th Laighton hasn't much draft/better for the river. Contributors getting very seasick sometimes suddenly. Had a kid spew his partially digested clam chowder all over my shoes. Coast Guard ended up taking a lot of people off so the rest could finish the cruise.

Gig to remember.

Linn

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Becca72
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 11:40 AM

Well I'll never look at clam chowdah the same way again...Ewwww.

When my niece was little she horked in one of the bins of sweaters at a discount department store.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Greg B
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 11:45 AM

>but it turned out to refer to the Chinese takeout food that had been
>provided.

"One night outside the Chinese chippy, I shouted out for Huey
Cuz I'd had me share of pint of ale and curried pork chop suey..."

--- Bernard Wrigley

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Peace
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 11:59 AM

Takes lots of guts to do that.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: catspaw49
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 12:57 PM

Worst one I ever heard........It was before we moved back from Georgia so I guess maybe '87. REdneck throwing up in Chick Fil-A parking lot and my friend asks if he's okay. The guy says he's doing a little carpentry. Our response was "Say what?" He says, "Karen Carpentry."

The temptation to kick this guy in the balls was really strong but we did at least ignore him, hopefully not giving him any satisfaction.

Spaw

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Severn
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 03:15 PM

Even "Amazing Grace" couldn't save a retch like that!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 03:40 PM

Manitas has twice now puked over the steering wheel whilst driving... once whilst I was in the car. The car was moving quite slowly as he was trying to pull into a car park at the time, but I was out and across the car park bfore he got the handbrake on. It was a real treat for the people in the Little Chef eating their breakfasts and looking out the windows.... Manitas heaving the remains of 5 pints of Tanglefoot over their lawns.


It was then that I decided I was going to learn to drive.

Do you know how long it takes to get the smell of puke out of a car dashboard?

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Becca72
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 03:53 PM

I think I'd rather just sell the car, Liz. :-)

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Bert
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 05:42 PM

You might be better off selling Manitas;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Greg B
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 08:21 PM

Oh god. Puking while driving.

That brings back an awful memory.

I went to a flying-club meeting several years back. Consumed
a couple donuts then realized I felt rather poorly. Very poorly
indeed.

Got in the car, and made it about two miles down the country road
before I realized that something was going to erupt--- NOW.

Pulled over, and actually go the door open before I chunderspewed
on the ground, on the door, on my trousers, and unfortunately,
on the dashboard of my beloved AUDI S4.

Now, the S4 has very stylish fine screens over its dashboard
and door stereo speakers. It was quite the job to get the bits
out of there next day--- but I get ahead of myself.

So there I was, by the side of the road, with vomit down
the front of my trousers, wondering what to do about getting
myself home. I knew I could drive, but the 'bung' I was
giving off was not pleasant.

So I did the only thing I could think of.

I stepped behind the car, took off the soiled trousers, and tossed
them into the boot, where a 'Weather-Tek' liner could come to no
harm.

Jumped into the driver's seat and all the 15 miles home prayed
that a) I'd keep my few remaining cookies down and b) No officer
of the law would find reason to pull my over and find me driving
home in me Y-fronts (aka 'tighty whities').

Got back to the farm where I was at the time renting a loft over
the garage and ran out and upstairs before my landlady or her
daughter could spot me.

Spent the next day or so groaning in the bed.

There was something ignominious about hurling in the car when I can
fly upside down and squiggly in an airplane and never bat an eye
in situations which would make others toss up their toenails.

Just remembered the rest of that Bernard Wrigley verse:

"Last night outside the Chinese chippy I shouted out for Huey
I'd had me share of pints of ale and curried pork chop suey
But as I lay there in the gutter, I was glad I wore me Mac
Because when I shouted out for Huey, someone answered back!"

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 20 Dec 07 - 09:42 PM

The scientific name for yaupon holly is Ilex Vomitoria, so called because various American Indian tribes used its leaves to brew a vomit inducing ceremonial tea.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 21 Dec 07 - 03:29 AM

How apt this thread is. I've spent a great deal of the last 18 hours with a mewling, puking child...

Limpit "decorated" the front room carpet yesterday - 'luckily' she'd been feeling poorly and hadn't eaten so it was just the blackcurrant drink she'd had an hour previously... ever seen purple snot?

Just as well I had a new can of carpet cleaner handy and no pigeons.

Anyone else seen 'The Meaning of Life' from the Monty Python crew? Remember Mr Creosote? "Jus wan moor waffer theen meent?" Allegedly, they used several gallons of Scotch Broth - a chunky meat and vegetable soup that bears an astonishing resemblance to those plastic puke puddles you can buy in joke shops for that scene. Some of the extras had not been completely prepared so quite a lot of those retches and heaves were real.

I can honestly say I've not eaten Scotch Broth since seeing that film.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: The Fooles Troupe
Date: 21 Dec 07 - 06:18 AM

Just undergone some close personal experience.

The empty stomach first thing in the morning when the nose is dumping out huge amounts of mucus...

Gotta go now...

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Becca72
Date: 21 Dec 07 - 10:35 AM

LOL Liz.

"Oh my, I have trod in ze bucket"

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 22 Dec 07 - 04:35 AM

Gervaise!! Another bucket for M'seur.

Guess what I'm going to watch this afternoon whilst making cushion covers....

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Azizi
Date: 22 Dec 07 - 07:46 AM

This thread proves we'll talk about anything.

I guess that's good.

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: john f weldon
Date: 23 Dec 07 - 04:59 PM

I put this on a Xmas thread, but EmmaB reminded me that it fits here as well:

A little tale apropos of nothing:
When I was young, I noticed that everything we did on Christmas became part of a tradition; if we did something one year, we had to do it every year forever after. Playing table shuffleboard on Xmas Eve or reassembling the old toy train....
Naturally Christmas became ever more complex as we tried to fit in all the traditions.

One year my (then about 6-yr old) sister ran downstairs to look at her presents, and the excitment overwhelmed her. She stared for a second, then ran to the kitchen sink and vomited violently!

My father watched grimly. "Oh God, now we have to add this as well!"

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 23 Dec 07 - 05:42 PM

What's green and has two eyes made out of coal?




Frosty the Snotman!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,strad
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 06:14 AM

Coming home from a holiday we went for a curry in Aberdeen. When we got on the ferry for a fourteen hour trip home, the wind was picking up and by the time we sailed it was a full gale. Now, I am not the best of sailors, so within the hour I'm lying on my bunk (the lower one she insisted) and calling for Bert and Hughie at regular intervals. The stench in the cabin was so bad that even I noticed it. I felt sorry for the next passengers who'd use that cabin. Never eaten curry before sailing since!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,LTS pretending to work and very glad she is
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 06:22 AM

because I was woken this morning to the sound of the cat yakking on the stairs... not a good day for walking round barefoot in our house. Good job we have an industrial sized can of carpet shampoo and I'm now at work.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Art Thieme
Date: 25 Dec 07 - 05:38 AM

If ya wanna get thin after eating a shoat
Stick your finger down your throat
Wiggle it around and around and around
And there it'll be all over the ground
Won't look like ham
Maybe more like Spam.

(by Anna Rexic---Christmas morning---2007)

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Art Thieme
Date: 25 Dec 07 - 05:40 AM

Have a merry one!!!

Love,

Art

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Art Thieme
Date: 25 Dec 07 - 05:43 AM

That's a mental fur ball if I've ever heard one!!!

(art)

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Art Thieme
Date: 25 Dec 07 - 05:44 AM

...and it was post # 100 to boot!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Joe_F
Date: 25 Dec 07 - 09:12 PM

If there is ever to be a song about seasickness, it strikes me that the list of degrees of freedom of a ship would make an excellent chorus:

Roll, pitch, yaw,
Surge, sway, heave!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 25 Dec 07 - 11:19 PM

As long as thee is puke, there will be a need for day-shift janitorial staff in elementary schools. They can do the mopping and waxing after-hours, but the puke cleanup's gotta be done now!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,strad
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 06:22 AM

Sailing Ship Rule: Hauling to be done on board, heaving to be done over the side!

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Becca72
Date: 26 Dec 07 - 11:19 AM

Bee-Dubya...that just gave me a major flashback to elementary school...our janitor would come in with a bucket of cat litter (or something else absorbant) and would spread it over the puke like he was feeding chickens...he would even say "here chick, chick, chick" while he did it. Generally it grossed us out even more...

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: Mrs.Duck
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 07:57 AM

A few weeks back the whole family went down (one by one not all at the same time) with a stomach bug. First to suffer was Molly (8) who along with twin brother had been sent up to tidy bedroom in readiness for Christmas. Needless to say they did very little and by bedtime the floor was still covered in an assortment of books, toys and discarded clothes. The plastic bedside cabinet from IKEA was lying on its back also full of junk. I decided it was better tackled the next day and regretted that decision an hour later when Molly (who sleeps in the top bunk) got up to go to the loo and in mid ladder threw up covering all the stuff on the floor and filling the cabinet!! On the plus side there are now a lot fewer toys and books to tidy as they all went into the bin!
The rest of the family confined their upchucking to suitable receptacles or so I thought. Our washing tub disappeared for a week or so but was discovered by Geoff last week in the dustbin. Evidently my eldest son (21 so we don't venture into his room often)thought it was just right for the purpose but didn't see the need to empty it or wash it out! Instead he just covered it with a towel for a week or two and then dumped it in the bin. Of course by this time the carrots had gone green and furry!! Even the bin men doidn't deserve that Christmas box so geoff did get it out, clean it and its back in its rightful place. Son is apparently suffering from post Christmas reflux today but this time if he doesn't clear up after himself he may find his bags packed and left by the bin!
More turkey anyone?

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,LTS pretending to work
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 08:05 AM

As a Christmas treat yesterday evening I left the few remaining prawns out for the kitties before going to to visit a friend.

Regretted it when I got back 3 hours later when I had to clear prawny cat yak off the kitchen floor..

If the sodding animals will eat everything in sight, they should at least have the decency to keep it down or do it in the garden where the pigeons will dispose of it.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,Billy Weeks
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 09:12 AM

Quick! quick! the cat's been sick -
Where? where? under the chair -
Hasten! hasten! fetch a basin -
Too late! too late! it's all in vain -
The cat has licked it up again

Subject: RE: BS: Puke--thoughts needed, good or bad.
From: GUEST,Billy Weeks
Date: 27 Dec 07 - 09:14 AM

Which must mean that I've lost my cookie.
Must regurgitate it.
BW