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Campsite at Drumcree IV

GUEST,The Bouncers in Lavery's 08 Feb 02 - 09:13 AM
GUEST,Chip on Shoulder 08 Feb 02 - 09:18 AM
GUEST,kearns and ginos walkie talkie 08 Feb 02 - 09:22 AM
GUEST,BBC News online 08 Feb 02 - 09:23 AM
GUEST,BBC Overseas Service 08 Feb 02 - 10:25 AM
GUEST,The Irish Times 08 Feb 02 - 10:32 AM
GUEST,Darren Vaughan 08 Feb 02 - 10:44 AM
GUEST,The Clancy Brothers 08 Feb 02 - 11:00 AM
GUEST,Jim Reeves 08 Feb 02 - 11:03 AM
GUEST,Darren Vaughan 08 Feb 02 - 11:19 AM
GUEST,Grafitti on wall 08 Feb 02 - 11:22 AM
GUEST,Graffiti 08 Feb 02 - 11:27 AM
GUEST,NEWS 08 Feb 02 - 11:44 AM
GUEST,Malachy Kearns' Graveside Oration 08 Feb 02 - 11:46 AM
GUEST,Derek Bell 08 Feb 02 - 11:53 AM
GUEST,Roman O'Proddy 08 Feb 02 - 12:09 PM
GUEST,Derek Bell 08 Feb 02 - 12:19 PM
GUEST,Derek Bell 08 Feb 02 - 12:21 PM
GUEST,Malachy Kearns, back from bodhran heaven - 2 08 Feb 02 - 05:01 PM
GUEST,George W. Bush 08 Feb 02 - 05:47 PM
Hrothgar 09 Feb 02 - 06:12 AM
GUEST,THE GRAND FINALE!! 11 Feb 02 - 06:18 AM
GUEST,archivist 15 Apr 02 - 11:33 AM
alison 15 Apr 02 - 10:13 PM
GUEST,Begrudger 16 Apr 02 - 08:13 AM
GUEST,graffiti spotted in Edenderry 16 Apr 02 - 08:16 AM
GUEST,Derek Bell 16 Apr 02 - 09:23 AM
GUEST,Eamonn Holmes 16 Apr 02 - 04:41 PM
alison 16 Apr 02 - 09:44 PM
Paddy Plastique 17 Apr 02 - 05:15 AM
John MacKenzie 17 Apr 02 - 05:50 AM
GUEST,Val Doonican 17 Apr 02 - 07:03 AM
GUEST,Dept of Ethnogastronomy, QUB 18 Apr 02 - 03:45 AM
GUEST,Dept of Ethnodebauchery, QUB 18 Apr 02 - 03:48 AM
GUEST,Dept of Tenorbanjology, QUB 18 Apr 02 - 03:52 AM
GUEST,Dept of Ethnodebauchery, QUB 18 Apr 02 - 03:59 AM
Ella who is Sooze 18 Apr 02 - 05:17 AM
GUEST,The Late Review 18 Apr 02 - 05:24 AM
GUEST,Hugo Duncan 18 Apr 02 - 09:30 AM
GUEST,Seán Pól O Tuathail 18 Apr 02 - 10:57 AM
GUEST,Bewildered 18 Apr 02 - 12:04 PM
GUEST,Roger O'K 18 Apr 02 - 01:13 PM
GUEST,The Begrudgers 18 Apr 02 - 04:34 PM
GUEST,Tarry Wig-On 18 Apr 02 - 04:56 PM
GUEST,Spartacus 18 Apr 02 - 05:02 PM
GUEST,NO! 18 Apr 02 - 05:03 PM
GUEST,The v'ice o' rayson 18 Apr 02 - 05:04 PM
alison 18 Apr 02 - 10:03 PM
GUEST,Mr Whippy the artic roll salesman 19 Apr 02 - 04:10 AM
GUEST,BBC Regional News 19 Apr 02 - 04:18 AM
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Subject: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,The Bouncers in Lavery's
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 09:13 AM

RIGHT THERE FOLKS MOVE IT OUT PLEASE!
New part to this thread.
Do yer talkin' while yer walkin'.
Have youse no homes tae go to?

Continuity Thread Alert Campsite at Drumcree III


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Chip on Shoulder
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 09:18 AM

Oooooooh!!!

Showing off, are we? Lavery's, eh!?

Jus' cos you went to University up in the Belfast!

It's a hole, anyway.

I was there with a mate once and we got bucked out for askin' for Bucky out o' th'optics!


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,kearns and ginos walkie talkie
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 09:22 AM

walkie talkie conversation

Kearns... ah, there you are good man yerself, gino me comrade at drums...

1, 4 copy

....

gino... ah rite, Malachy what's that you said

a muster of bodhrans are being pushed near the cliffs of moher?

kearns.... jaysus that's rite pal, can ye send the big lads in to give the scoundrel antidrumestablishmentarians a real hounding of a wallop.

gino... we're on the case pal, can you bus another load of your tuneable specials our way again. The lads down in b block are perfecting their rhythm entry again...

ahhh and Malachy, great rhythm speach...

roger over n out


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,BBC News online
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 09:23 AM

The FBI are investigating a number of videos found in a cave in the Burren. The videos, believed to be instructional in nature, were seized in a daring dawn raid. They are said to show training exercises filmed in local pubs. The Continuity Bodhrán Liberation Army claim the videos have 'nothing to do with them', and that the poor quality means it 'cannot be proved' that dissident leader Gino "Mad Dog" Lupari appears in the footage.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,BBC Overseas Service
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 10:25 AM

Dateline Brussels, Friday 8, 2002

A spokesperson for the European Commission today promised international cooperation in the Fight Against Bhorranism. President Mario Proddy has set up a special Corr- dinating committee whose aim is to root out this pernicious conspiracy wherever it has taken root. Special attention will be paid to so-called Irish Pubs which have appeared in many cities across Europe. In these places, in the seedy backstreets of Brussels, Paris and Amsterdam, passing under unremarkable names - "Kitty O'Shea's", "Michael Molloy's", the "James Joyce" and others, impressionable young people have been secretly indoctrinated and trained in percussionism of the vilest kind. Simple-minded Europeans have been taken in, given their instruments and sent out across the globe to terrorise polite society. For the leaders of this conspiracy, Proddy has what he calls a simple message. "We will track them down. They can run, but they can't hide. God is on our side", he noted.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,The Irish Times
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 10:32 AM

White powder found in an envelope sent to eminent Drumcree Session musician Derek Bell has been removed by Gardai for forensic testing. The powder, found within an envelope bearing a Donegal postmark, is being treated as suspicious.
Enya is helping police with their enquiries.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Darren Vaughan
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 10:44 AM

This is Darren Vaughan at the news desk. President Bush today said and I quote the CIA will be spreading their testicles like an octopus in a bid to infiltrate these bodhran dens and seek out the evil-doers who are responsible for brain washing young people into their service. Prime minister Blair who was looking on smuggly in the background said that president Bush's timing on this bodhran crisis couldn't have been better.

In a related story dissident National Bodhran Liberation Army leader Sammy Bin Lidden said that this is now a holy war and that the world will experience the mother, father, brother and sister of a row the like was never seen so it will.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,The Clancy Brothers
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 11:00 AM

Oh then tell Sean O'Farrell, tell me why you hurry so
Hush mo buachall, hush and listen and his cheeks were all aglow
I bear orders from Lupari, get you ready quick and soon
Cos we'll hit our drums a dunder by the risin' of the moon
By the risin' of the moon, by the risin' of the moon
We'll hit our drums a dunder by the risin' of the moon

Oh then tell me, Sean O'Farrell where the drum-in is to be
In that spot not far from Doolin quite well known to you and me
There'll be Christy, aye and Cathy, there'll be Mal in thick disguise
We'll batter our oul goatskins underneath thon Western skies
Underneath thon western skies, underneath thon western skies
We'll batter our oul goatskins underneath thon Western skies

In many's a pub in Doolin, they drunk pints of stout that night
Then at the hour for closing, beneath the silvery light
They battered out The Beggarman, Big Maggie, Siúl A Rún
A thousand baters thumpin' to the risin' of the moon
The risin' of the moon, the risin' of the moon
A thousand baters thumpin' to the risin' of the moon


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Jim Reeves
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 11:03 AM

"I hear the sounds of distant drums ..."

Oh shite! I'm in the wrong place altogether, aren't I?


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Darren Vaughan
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 11:19 AM

This is Darren Vaughan at the news desk. The Maze prison which was to be turned into a Museum was today being temporarly used as a prison. Under operation "snatch and gob", NIPS officers in a serious of dawn raids around the province arrested a number of Bodhraneers. These dissident skin spankers will be held in the Maze under the Special Powers Act, known locally as the skittery-idle-dum rule. As yet there is still no word on the where-a-bouts of rebel leaders Lupari and Bin Lidden. Now the weather rain, rain ,rain and more rain.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Grafitti on wall
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 11:22 AM

GIVE THE DRUM BACK TO DRUMCREE!


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Graffiti
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 11:27 AM

Bodhrán drum = Máire Drumm Give peace a chance


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,NEWS
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 11:44 AM

News has reached us that Malachy Kearns, leader of the dissident New Real Provisional Continuity Bodhrán Liberation Army (Roundstone Branch) has been "battered into submission", by members of a rival bodhránii faction.

A statement by the Real New Provisional Continuity Bodhrán Liberation Army (Walton's Branch) confirmed that the "battering into submission" (a euphemism for a gangland-style execution) was carried out in the interests of a "...just and lasting settlement for all percussionists in the Island of Ireland."

Police are said to suspect a certain large gentleman of Italian extraction ...


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Malachy Kearns' Graveside Oration
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 11:46 AM

It has seemed right, before we turn away from this place in which we have laid the mortal remains of Malachy Kearns, that one among us should, in the name of all, speak the praise of that valiant man, and endeavor to formulate the thought and the hope that are in us as we stand around his grave. And if there is anything that makes it fitting that I, rather than some other, I rather than one of the grey-haired men who were young with him and shared in his labour and in his suffering, should speak here, it is perhaps that I may be taken as speaking on behalf of a new generation that has been re-baptised in the bodhránii faith, and that has accepted the responsibility of carrying out the bodhránii programme. I propose to you then that, here by the grave of this unrepentant bodhránii, we renew our baptismal vows; that, here by the grave of this unconquered and unconquerable man, we ask of God, each one for himself, such unshakable purpose, such high and gallant courage, such unbreakable strength of soul as belonged to Malachy Kearns.

Deliberately here we avow ourselves, as he avowed himself in the dock, Bodhránii of one allegiance only. We of the Bodhrán Liberation Army, and you others who are associated with us in to-day's task and duty, are bound together and must stand together henceforth in brotherly union for the achievement of the freedom to batter and dunder. And we know only one definition of freedom: it is Moore's definition, it is Lupari's definition, it is Malachy Kearn's definition. Let no man blaspheme the cause that the dead generations of bodhránii served by giving it any other name and definition than their name and their definition.

We stand at Kearns' grave not in sadness but rather in exaltation of spirit that it has been given to us to come thus into so close a communion with that brave and splendid Gael. Splendid and holy causes are served by men who are themselves splendid and holy. Kearns was splendid in the proud manhood of him, splendid in the heroic grace of him, splendid in the Gaelic strength and clarity and truth of him. And all that splendour and pride and strength was compatible with a humility and a simplicity of devotion to the bodhrán, to all that was olden and beautiful and Gaelic in Ireland. The clear true eyes of this man almost alone in his day visioned Ireland as we of to-day would surely have her: not free merely, but full of the battering of bater on goatskin as well.

In a closer spiritual communion with him now than ever before or perhaps ever again, in a spiritual communion with those of his day, living and dead, who suffered with him on the run or in his hideaways throughout The Burren (Bodhrán Bodhrán), in communion of spirit too with our own dear comrades who hide out thus to-day, and speaking on their behalf as well as our own, we pledge to the bodhrán our love, and we pledge to the laws against the bodhrán our hate. This is a place of peace, sacred to the dead, where men should speak with all charity and with all restraint; but I hold it a Christian thing, as Kearns held it, to hate evil, to hate untruth, to hate oppression, and, hating them, to strive to overthrow them. Our foes are strong and wise and wary; but, strong and wise and wary as they are, they cannot undo the miracles of God who ripens in the hearts of young men the seeds sown by the young men of a former generation. And the seeds sown by the young men of Planxty and The Bothy Band are coming to their miraculous ripening to-day. Rulers and Defenders of Realms had need to be wary if they would guard against such processes. Life springs from death; and from the graves of bodhránii spring living bodhránii. The Defenders of this Realm have worked well in secret and in the open. They think that they have pacified Ireland. They think that they have purchased half of us and intimidated the other half. They think that they have foreseen everything, think that they have provided against everything; but the fools, the fools, the fools! - they have left us our bodhránii dead, and while Ireland holds these graves, Ireland devoid of the sacred rattle of the bater on goatskin shall never be at peace.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Derek Bell
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 11:53 AM

I'd just like to say that in me own defence...that I was trying to sneak a sherbet fountain so that Paddy wouldn't see... when the postman came. Paddy shouted down the stairs was that the post and A swear to God he put the heart across me so he did and did'nt A spill the sherbet fountain onto the envelopes. One was a letter from Enya addressed to Sean Keane and the other was the gas bill. That's all I'd like to say...can A go to the toilet now?


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Roman O'Proddy
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 12:09 PM

Following a hastily convened meeting of the Council of Ministers and of the full Commission, we have decided to form a new Commission Directorate-General, to be named DG Antipercussion and to be headed by Deputy Commission President Welsh Windbag Kinnock. My appointment of WW Neil emphasises the Commisssion's commitment toward eliminating this percussion menace that is threatening our unity and civilization. While working fully with our European Member States, the Commission itself will take full measures in purging Bodhranii or those suspected of Bodhranism from amongst its staff and working structures. The Commission has, for many years, been feeling repercussions and we had attributed this to fraud and dishonesty within our own ranks. Now we realize we were wrong. What we were feeling was in fact the actions of concealed cells of Bodhranii amongst our own, sheltering also within the facades of the James Joyce's, Shitty O'Kayes, O'Reilleys and Scruffy O'Neil's littered around the fair capital of Europe.

With the full backing of my team and of WW Neil, we are certain that we can play our part in the depercussionization not only of the island of Ireland but also of the European Union.

Please note that the Commission has no remit nor authority to tackle the issue of Dediddlyization at present.

Roman O'Proddy for the European Commission


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Derek Bell
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 12:19 PM

Mr. O'Proddy I think your full of shite so I do.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Derek Bell
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 12:21 PM

Here I didn't say that atall so I didn't. Somebody's codin' round so they are...this is feckin' terrible so it is.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Malachy Kearns, back from bodhran heaven - 2
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 05:01 PM

awwww shite, no one told me I was dead.

awwwwwww.... what about me goats...


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,George W. Bush
Date: 08 Feb 02 - 05:47 PM

Say, do any of you fellas sing any Irish songs? You know, like "Danny Boy", or "When Irish Eyes are Smiling"? Or what's that one about the animals, that starts "A long time ago when the earth was green..."? Laura and I just love Irish songs.

Patriotically,
George W. Bush


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: Hrothgar
Date: 09 Feb 02 - 06:12 AM

You and I travel to the beat of a different drum, oh, can't you tell by the way I run every time you play drums at me...


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,THE GRAND FINALE!!
Date: 11 Feb 02 - 06:18 AM

(THE GHOST OF WILLIE CLANCY TAKES TO THE STAGE …) Ladies and Gentlemen …

We'd like to thank yez all for comin' and for the jovial hospitality shown by all throughout the past few days up here in Drumcree. I'm sure yez'll all be hard-pressed to min' a fuckin' thing, the state of yez.

Now, to roun' off proceedin's, we're gonny gi' yez something special …

All musicians and personalities involved in the oul' proceedin's are assembled here behin' me for the finale. So, let's not have any further how d'ye do … the lads and lassies are gonny gi' yez thon oul' standard, "The Partin' Glass" in their own style.

G'luck and good night!

(THE CURTAIN PARTS TO REVEAL A STAGE FULL OF THE CREAM OF IRELAND'S MUSICAL AND OTHER TALENT …

SHANE MACGOWAN STEPS FORWARD AS THE ASSEMBLED HORDES MOAN A DRONE NOTE FOR HIM)

(SHANE) Oh, all the money that e'er I had
I spent it in good company
And all the harm that e'er I done
Alas it was to none but me
And all I've done for want of wit
To mem'ry now I can't recall
So fill to me the partin' glass (CHHEEEEEERRRRR)
Goodnight and joy be with you all!

(THE CHOIR PARTS. BARNEY McKENNA AND GERRY O'CONNOR ARE SEATED OPPOSITE EACH OTHER. THEY PLAY "THE WIND THAT SHAKES THE BARLEY" THREE TIMES ROUND AND THEN LAUNCH INTO "OFF TO CALIFORNIA" THREE TIMES ROUND.

THE CROWD CLOSES IN AROUND THEM AGAIN.

THE AUDIENCE ARE IN A FRENZY.

DEREK BELL STEPS UP TO THE MIKE.)

(DEREK BELL) Oh if I had money enough to spend
I'd buy an ounce of snow-white coke
Cos I swear I'm damn near round the bend
Oul' Paddy Moloney nearly makes me boke
With his gerny wee gob and his "failte" bonhomie
He 's such a pain in my fuckin' balls
So raise to me the partin' glass
Good night and joy be with you all

(THE CHOIR PARTS TO REVEAL PADDY KEENAN AND LIAM ÓG O'FLYNN SEATED OPPOSITE EACH OTHER. THEY PLAY THREE TIMES ROUND "THE WIND THAT SHAKES THE BARLEY" BEFORE LAUNCHING INTO A WILD VERSION OF "THE BUCKS OF ORANMORE".

THE AUDIENCE ARE DEMENTED.

THE CHOIR CLOSES AROUND THE PIPERS.

EAMONN HOLMES TAKES THE MIKE.)

(EAMONN HOLMES) Oh all the grub that ever I ate
It fairly made my belly swell
And all the Baileys that e'er I drank
Was likin' drawin' water from a damn deep well
And all the honeys I made a pass
And footered with up the Seagoe wall
Oh raise to me the partin' glass
Good night and joy be with you all

(THE CHOIR PARTS TO REVEAL TOMMY PEOPLES AND MAIREAD NI MHAONAIGH SITTING OPPOSITE EACH OTHER. THEY PLAY "THE WIND THAT SHAKES THE BARLEY" – JOHN DOHERTY'S SETTING – AND THEN LAUNCH INTO "TOMMY PEOPLES' REEL".

THE CROWD GO FRANTIC.

THE CHOIR CLOSES AROUND THEM AGAIN AND SINGS THE FINAL VERSE IN UNISON.)

(CHOIR) Oh it's fare thee well to one and all
From the session here in Sweet Drumcree
And safely home through Portydown
And onwards to your own country
We may chance to meet again
In Belfast, Cork or Donegal
Then raise to me the partin' glass
Good night and joy be with you all

(THE CHOIR TROOPS OFF STAGE TO WILD APPLAUSE WHICH FADES TO AN EERIE SILENCE. SOMEWHERE … FAR OFF IN THE DISTANCE … A LONE PIPER PLAYS "TAIMSE IM CHODLADH.)

THE END


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,archivist
Date: 15 Apr 02 - 11:33 AM

although Campsite at Drumcree #1 is current at Mudcat, it has 166 messages and my computer times out before the thread is fully opened. I suggest anyone wanting to continue the festivities camps in this section of the site!


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: alison
Date: 15 Apr 02 - 10:13 PM

applause!!!!!!!!!!!

ENCORE!!!!!!!!!!

'thon waz pure majik, so it waz....

the Clancy Brothers had tears running down my cheeks with

"By the risin' of the moon, by the risin' of the moon
We'll hit our drums a dunder by the risin' of the moon"....

only wish I could have got there in time to join in on my Lambeg!!!

(brilliant work......)

slainte

alison




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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Begrudger
Date: 16 Apr 02 - 08:13 AM

The bodhráníi if Irelabd are hounded mercilessly out of existence by the forces of philistinism and Orangeism. And yet this alison woman flaunts her lambeg in our faces!

There is no justice in Ireland and never will be!

Malachy Kearns ... the current and as yet unborn generations of bodhráníi will not forget you!


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,graffiti spotted in Edenderry
Date: 16 Apr 02 - 08:16 AM

Scrawled across a wall in Edenderry. The lambegí are gloatin'.

"We will never forget you Malachy Somebody-or-other".


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Derek Bell
Date: 16 Apr 02 - 09:23 AM

Here... I wouldn't mind her flauntin' somethin' else in me face so I wouldn't, that was a cracker wasn't it Paddy?


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Eamonn Holmes
Date: 16 Apr 02 - 04:41 PM

Ah enough of this oul' bollox!

I'm lockjawin'.

Anybody fancy a dander down tae the Chinese for a gravy chip wi' peas 'n' onions?


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: alison
Date: 16 Apr 02 - 09:44 PM

I'm wi yew Eamonn..... I'm fair famished..... c'mon an we'll put sum meat on yer bones!!.... mind yew I like the real Chineses food... I want chips in curry sauce!!


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: Paddy Plastique
Date: 17 Apr 02 - 05:15 AM

This thread any relation to yer man George Hamilton IV ???
Terrible lot, that IV family... and Derek Bell - give over that sort o' talk - sure ye
haven't finished playing wi' yerself yet...


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 17 Apr 02 - 05:50 AM

If a woman flaunts her Lambeg in yer face, and you haven't got yer bodhran handy, can you still use the rhythm method?
I only ask in case it ever comes up in conversation!
Failte...Giok


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Val Doonican
Date: 17 Apr 02 - 07:03 AM

Can I bring me wooly jumper and me rocking chair and sing some of those awfull 'Pady McGinty's Goat' thingies to youse orange bar stewards. Pass me the Buckfast and Vimto


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Dept of Ethnogastronomy, QUB
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 03:45 AM

Found scribbled on a discarded chip wrapper outside Cafolla's ...

I am Eamonn
More girthsome am I than Gino the drummer
Great is my glory
I got my gub on Breakfast telly
Great is my shame
I call the oul' bingo in suits all shiny
I am Eamonn
A greater self-parody than Terry Wig-on


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Dept of Ethnodebauchery, QUB
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 03:48 AM

I am Derek
Pluckier am I than the sightless O'Carolan
Great is my glory
Harping like stink in horn-rims and v-necks
Great is my shame
A fierce man for the oul' drugs
I am Derek
More debauched am I than the cue-wielding Higgins


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Dept of Tenorbanjology, QUB
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 03:52 AM

I am Barney
Faster am I than the light of Heaven
Great is my glory
The Mason's Apron a blur of notes
Great is my glory
The Mason's Apron a blur of notes
I am Barney
Hairier am I than a mountainy buck-goat


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Dept of Ethnodebauchery, QUB
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 03:59 AM

Mise Shane
Drunker am I than Ollie the actor
Great is my glory
I who wrote "Body Of An American"
Great is my shame
I who scribbled "Five Green Queens And Jean"
Mise Shane
Not victim, not martyr, not saint nor sinner


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: Ella who is Sooze
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 05:17 AM

I know who you are... whooo whooo whooo whooo arrrrrrrr!

Very funny. Stay off the buckfast, I think you are getting dependant.

E :-)


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,The Late Review
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 05:24 AM

Tom Paulin writes:
"The underlying rhythm of these works jettison all earnest explication of the text - meaning, paraphrasable content, social and historical situation - and concentrate entirely on sound, cadence, metre, rhyme, form. I can imagine the guttural Ulster glottal stops of Eamonn's boastful lament as he sings to the world of his achievements. The use of "Breakfast" with its similarity to "Buckfast" draws the reader's attention to the gluttony of the subject, as does the mention of "gub" with its connotations of eating and drinking; the "shiny" screams of prosperity, of the money he makes. This thread of greed has the content mimicking the form - food as a subject, written on food wrappings. It invites me to picture the next stanza - I am Derek - scribbled on a wrap of speed, lying in the gutter; or Mise Shane incoherently scrawled on a beermat.
What do you think, Germaine?"


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Hugo Duncan
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 09:30 AM

Uncle Hugo here, how are yiz all doing. You put on the kettle and I'll bring the crame buns ohhh laaa. Now we have a wee letter here from Big Alec who says could ye play a request for the missus ye wee fat Straban bastard. Sure I will, I will, I will, for because your Uncle Hugo loves ye so he does. Now just keep the requests comin' here's Big Tom with his Achy Breaky heart, ohhhh laaa.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Seán Pól O Tuathail
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 10:57 AM

Me and de rest of the lads in frocks here in Rome have been tinking about making a conciliatory gesture to our separated bredren over in Drumcree. Well actually it was de American lads who tink our lot are getting a bad name for being too interested in little boys and tought we should brush up our image.

So we've opened up a "comfort tent" staffed by a couple of Blue Nuns who will show de bredren a good time for a couple of fast bucks. We can't afford a pianna player, but de order's acid gregorian trance band "Cyanic sister" are doing background music.

You can't miss it. Look for de tent with the little red altar lamp oustide, behind Bobby Molloy's Wig and Gavel Porter Tent, just to de left of de Gig Rig.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Bewildered
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 12:04 PM

What the hell is all this about?


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Roger O'K
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 01:13 PM

Poor bewildered, my heart goes out to you.

It's a Northern Ireland running joke which has taken on a life of its own. In fact it could arguably stake a claim to becoming a permathread, because it started off way off topic with someone who needed to get a load off his chest about current political issues by sharing it with fellow-mudcatters, but then mysteriously drifted bang onto topic by giving rise to a good dozen parodies, many of which are in the pure folk tradition of updating old songs to new circumstances.

It's drifted back off for a while, but even when OT it contains numerous musicians' in jokes, many of which would be accessible to folkies who are not Irish - e.g. the obsession with the Corrs which permeates the Chiff & Fipple forums, or the inevitable bodhran abuse theme.

I'm a newbie myself and still learning netiquette, so I'm still signing on as a guest, but Mudcat has been a revelation. At an early stage, when I was still aglow with gratitude for all the help which I'd got from Catters in finding words to a song, I posted a critical comment about someone lowering the tone of the site with some rather sharp political comments. But of course, I was the one who was wrong, because folk song (not least of the US variety) would be a mere shadow of itself if you took out the political content and commentary on current affairs.

On a quiet day at work I went right back to the start of the Drumcree threads and read on from there, which is the only way to make sense of this magnificently surreal phenomenon. The original posting takes ages to download, and someone kindly put it up on a website at

http://members.atozasia.com/munster/Drumcree1.htm

(sorry about the unblue unclickiness) where it's much easier to print and read, if you're interested in Drumcree itself. If you want to know more about the Northern Ireland situation as a whole, another contributor to the thread posted the URL of a trustworthy online archive run by a university at

http://cain.ulst.ac.uk/cainbgn/index.html

- otherwise just skim through Brendy's magnum opus at the Drumcree site to get a flavour of the background then move on to where the fun begins at

http://www.mudcat.org/thread.cfm?threadid=43154

Beware, especially if you suffer from the German/American disease (spot the troll ;-) of literal-mindedness: not everything on this thread is to be taken at face value, and most if not all of the abuse is firmly tongue in cheek. Also, you will probably realise after a while that not all the postings in the name of famous musicians have necessarily been put up by the musicians in question. Likewise, Sean Pol O'Tuathail is Pope John Paul II, and he probably didn't really write the last posting.

But if you can spare the time, it will expand your consciousness in ways you could never have imagined.

And thanks to Mooman for encouraging me to go back to source on this mother and father of all threads (cue Iraq thread drift).


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,The Begrudgers
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 04:34 PM

"D'ye hear thon Paulin one! Jaysis ... ye'd near think he'd ate a dictionary!"

"Away outta thon! Sure thon wee stripe o' piss doesn't look like he ates anyhing. A good feed would do the crayter the very best! ... Mine yoo ... thon Eamonn Holmes boyo wud ate a dictionary if it was in front of him! Or an encyclopeeja. Or the good book itself!"

"He wud in sowl! He's the boy wud ate, I dare say! He didn't get a hole on him thon size from sendin' the dinner plate till heez ma wi a cupla spuds still left on it!"

"Not at all! The same boy wud ast if there wuz anawr drap left in the pot! The size of him! He's blew up like a poisoned pup!"

"I'd say thon boy's champ wud be swimmin' in butter!"

"Oh stop! Riverin' wi butter! And it drippin' aff heez oul wobbly chins!"

"And then he'd let an oul' rift outta him and waddle on down to the Ashburn or the Silverwood to try to get his oul graisy kisser roun some wee drunk girl from out the country."

"He's the fella to be watched. You mark my words, now! Oh, God! The thought of his graisy oul' chops bearin' down on ye! And the oul' smell of scallion champ on him. And Arctic Roll. And then maybe he'd have slapped a couple of dozen Baileys intill him, as well!"

"It'd make ye bad, just thinkin' about it!"

"It would, in sowl! Well, there's my bus. I'll see you again."


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Tarry Wig-On
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 04:56 PM

Mise Terry
More falsely-haired than Sir Johnathan of Elton
Great is my glory
More Oirish (bejaysus) than Lord Doonasa O'Valican
Great is my shame
More Oirish (begorrah) than Squire Valican O'Doonasa
Mise Téire
More meeja-tarty than Garvaghy Glo


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Spartacus
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 05:02 PM

Mise Spartacus!


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,NO!
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 05:03 PM

Mise Spartacus!


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,The v'ice o' rayson
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 05:04 PM

Now lads ... stap thon oul "Mise" carry-on!


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: alison
Date: 18 Apr 02 - 10:03 PM

Right ni I'm well pissed aff.............. which wun of yews menshunned arctic roll???????

an me sittin' here in the arse end of nowhere an' no chance of gettin' a slab!!

thon wuz jist mean!!!!!!


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,Mr Whippy the artic roll salesman
Date: 19 Apr 02 - 04:10 AM

Opening mail early in morning.

Dear Mr Whippy,

Please can ye get ye arse in gear there's a good wee man and bring me a bulk order o'artic rolls, I'm fair champin at the bit tae get me hands on a wee slab o the fair stuff.

I'd pay daecent money and I can put ye up. Just don't tell Big Mick.

Yours Sincerely

Alison

Aww, right I'm off. Hey Mrs Whippy, I'll be back in a couple o'days got an order tae deliver.


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Subject: RE: Campsite at Drumcree IV
From: GUEST,BBC Regional News
Date: 19 Apr 02 - 04:18 AM

Traffic in the bustling Home Counties market town of Por'ydoin was brought to a standstill today by a mass demonstration of at least thirteen placard-wielding folkies demanding permathread status for the Drumcree thread.

A spokesperson for the demonstrators said that, apart from enabling contributors to the thread to dress normally, permathread status would at last give mudcatters the parody of steam which was rightfully theirs. He also indicated that the thread is now the object of serious academic research in the US, and observed that, given the amount of university shite that Joyce fella was responsible for, there must be the makings of a good dozen PhD theses in the thread already. Permathread status would also enable the local economy to benefit from spinoff summer school business, he stressed, adding: "them crowd in the Free State have sewn up the trade in intense Yanks in peculiar clothes for far too long".

A PSNI spokesman confirmed that, thanks to the Force's new sensitivity training, the demonstration had passed off peacefully.


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