BS: So many disagreements and controversies...

Subject: BS: So many disagreements and controversies....
From: gnu
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 02:14 PM

... these days at The Café. Even a thread specifically for a scrap!

Well, I am not one to shy away, so.... the toilet paper roll feeds from the near side. Not the wall side. Never the wall side. Anybody who says otherwise is just WRONG!

Now. Anybody else have any other IMPORTANT problems?

(I searched three years back... I figure that is far enough back for a BS thread. Anybody who says otherwise.... )

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversy...
From: gnu
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 02:18 PM

Hey! I changed that to "ies" instead of "y". It changed here but it didn't change on the main page. I shall lodge a complaint with Joe. Perhaps I should start a new thread?

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversy...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 02:18 PM

I've tried it both ways. Just to see. Either way seems to work fine. This is scary, isn't it? It leaves me unable to decide who the "bad guys" really are...and that means that I won't know who to kill when the time comes!

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversy...
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 02:21 PM

"I won't know who to kill when the time comes!"

Just kill all of them. Problem solved.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversy...
From: gnu
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 02:22 PM

No it doesn't! Not when it's dark and the paper is short and is "stuck" so ya gotta spin it real fast in the ta get it ta work but when ya do it bunches up against that back of the riggin... eh? Like, geeze, eh?

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversy...
From: gnu
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 02:23 PM

...real fast ta get it ta work....

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversy...
From: Wesley S
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 02:34 PM

Atleast Gnu has "seen the light" when it comes to the proper way to hang a roll of toilet paper. It's just a shame that all of that paper has to come to a bad end.......

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversy...
From: gnu
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 02:39 PM

Hey! Just on Jan 24 past, Doc Murphy said I had the most improved end he ever seen... I don't have to have another innuendo fer five years. I'd say that's a pretty good ending.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversy...
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 02:45 PM

Well, nether do I. Ya wanna make something of it?

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Leadfingers
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 02:57 PM

DAMN !! I was going to post this as GUEST.Guest , but forgot to log out first !

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Becca72
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:00 PM

Toilet paper in MY house hangs neither from the front nor the rear...it is under the sink lest the two little darlin' kitties shred it.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: jacqui.c
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:05 PM

Gnu, you're WRONG - Mine hangs from the rear.



















And the toilet paper...............

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: RangerSteve
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:05 PM

I just put the rolls out on the shelf next to the toilet. You pick it up, if it doesn't unroll the way you want, you turn it around and the problem is solved.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Emma B
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:09 PM

isn't there enough bumf around already? :)

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: gnu
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:20 PM

RangerSteve.... thoughtful of you. Alwats thinking of others.

Rap... face it. We're just a couple of assholes among many.

Jac... hahahahahahahahahahahaa.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: SINSULL
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:26 PM

Corn cobs eliminate all need for toilet paper controversy. Just don't try to flush them.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:30 PM

Toilet paper? We don't need no stinkin' toilet paper.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: bobad
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:31 PM

Remember to always use your left hand.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:31 PM

But I eat left-handed.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Bobert
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:35 PM

How bourgeoisie, gnu-zer...

It's ol' corn cobs in the privy in a galvinzed bucket back in the hollar... That, of course, is fir after the Sears catalogue runs out... And the bucket is ***always*** kept to the right of you unless you got a fanvy two-holer the ya' put in the middle and ya' all share...

But if it's a one-holer then always to yer right... Don't matter if yer a lefty, 'round these parts you had better have the cob bucket to the right in case you have important company...

B;~)

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: bobad
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:35 PM

"But I eat left-handed."

That's OK because your germs are just going back to from where they came, but when you shake my hand they are paying me a visit.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: gnu
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:51 PM

Corn cobs might be okay in the south. But, up here in the Great (Frozen) White Notrh, it's the Sears catalogue that ruled for ages.

Corn cobs? Is that why Sheryl Crowed?

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 03:53 PM

Bobert iffen you were a REAL Liberal even yer corncobs would be on the left.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Bobert
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 04:00 PM

Hey, I'm beyond just "liberal" there, Rap, but I ain't fir messin' with no country traditions...

Well, okay, that ain't exactly right... If George Bush were comin' to dinner I'd hide the cob bucket in the barn an'stick one of them X-Laxes in his food...

Yezzir... I believe I'd have me a little bargaining power in short order...

B;~)

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Mrrzy
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 04:11 PM

First, it's WHOM to kill.

Second, if men are supposed to put the toilet seat back down for the women, why aren't women supposed to lift it up again for the men?

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Little Hawk
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 04:21 PM

Yes, "whom". Okay.

Women aren't supposed to lift the toilet seat up again because a toilet seat that's down is not a serious problem for anyone...but a toilet seat that's UP IS bloody well a serious problem if you happen to approach it unawares in the dark and you sit down only to have the unpleasant shock of falling suddenly into that cold, nasty porcelain bowl!!!!!!

This is as nasty a shock for men as it is for women, so it's just downright flippin' stupid for anyone to complain about the seat being left down. Men sometimes have to sit too, after all.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 04:36 PM

I put the entire cover down not just the seat. Problem solved.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 05:26 PM

I hate it when the cover is down too... at my time of life that extra 3 second or so could be the difference between comfort and additional laundry.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Becca72
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 05:44 PM

the cover and seat are down in my house. After all, people shit in there...

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 05:48 PM

The TP should hang so that it is most easily found...NOT against the wall.

Change should be kept in the RIGHT front pocket of a pair of pants. (with the keys!)

One should put the LEFT shoe on first.

The task bar in Windows is MUCH better at the top than the default bottom!

Tea should be made with loose tea,not tea-bags...except in cheap restaurants.

Coffee should be served (at least offered)WITH meals, not restricted to afterwards.

Records & CDS should be sorted by artist, when known, not by category.

Newspapers should be opened fully, not folded back on themselves...(except when seated in mass-transit)...so that they may be returned to original condition for other readers.

Detergent should be added to the washing machine FIRST,,,then water started...and clothes only after partially filled.

--------------------------------------------------------

I'll give everyone time to make notes and make necessary changes before the next list...

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: gnu
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 05:50 PM

That is the point I am trying to make.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 06:01 PM

Records & CDS should be sorted by artist, when known, not by category.

That is what I do, no value judgements.

Except for collections. Those are under 'collection: blues' or 'collection: folk' alphabetical by catagory and then by title within catagory. That part gets a little fuzzy sometimes but I haven't come up with a better way and the way I do it has been working for me for many a year now.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: dick greenhaus
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 06:03 PM

Gnu-
Have you ever had cats? They love it when the paper comes off the front of the roll.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 06:06 PM

They LOVE it when the door is left open. If the door is closed, the cats' opinion is rendered moot.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: gnu
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 06:18 PM

Yees dick... I "had" three. One was the ex's, one was ours, one was mine (she took mine when she left.... the others were gone on). They never messed with anything, twice. I trained them. Cats can be trained. Ya just gotta "speak cat" to them.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 06:22 PM

The question is....which hand do you use to wipe your bum/butt?
Sensible answers please.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 06:27 PM

If the paper comes off the front, you can put it into the toilet and flush it right off the roll.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Becca72
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 06:28 PM

"I trained them. Cats can be trained. Ya just gotta "speak cat" to them"


Gnu...come to my house. I have a challenge for ya!

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Bobert
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 06:34 PM

Cats train people... Not vice versa...

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Peace
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 06:34 PM

"Records & CDS should be sorted by artist, when known, not by category."

I agree, Bill. I sort them by the second letter of their last names.
When Prince was known as this I had no place for him and to this day no idea where I filed his work.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: John Hardly
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 06:38 PM

Printed toilet paper proves that the manufacturer's intent is that it hang, as gnu suggests, with the trailing edge out, NOT against the wall.

The manufacturers obviously don't own cats.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 07:03 PM

If you don't put the lid down when you flush, lots of little droplets and so forth get blasted into the air and float around the bathroom for the next person to use it to breathe in.

I don't know why it is some women seem to assume that just because a toilet seat is down it means it's been politely lowered by the bloke. More likely it means he never lifted it up in the first place...

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Azizi
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 07:14 PM

Then there's what's the best way to do it?-to squeeze the tube of toothpaste in the middle of from the bottom.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Azizi
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 07:15 PM

"of"="or"

Of course, you could disagree about doing other things too.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 07:16 PM

McGrath speaketh profoundly! Men can't even be trusted to raise the seat in MEN's rooms. (some flatly will NOT use urinals!...and some won't wait..)

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: RangerSteve
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 07:29 PM

The reason you put the lid down is because it's there. If they didn't want you to put it down, they wouldn't have included one with the toilet. Besides, what are you going to sit on to clip your toenails?

If this thread is going to drift to the subject of where people clip their toenails, it's not my fault.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 07:33 PM

Right hand wiping, of course.

and

My Beautiful Wife and I (many years ago) had many a little tiff because she was always squeezing the middle of the toothpaste tube, and with the old metal-foil tubes you ended with(and/either/or) a bunch of toothpaste that couldn't be squeezed out, or a continual struggle to get the trapped paste up to the nozzle (only to be squeezed down again when she next used the tube), and the tube was an ugly sight besides, AND in the process the tube broke and leaked, probably at the bottom end.

The present flexible plastic tubes are a great blessing to marital harmony, believe me!

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Rapparee
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 08:02 PM

My wife and I each have our own tube of toothpaste. That, and a tax accountant, may have saved our marriage.

As for men and seats up or down -- last summer a fella decided he couldn't go a hundred more yards to the potty on the golf course so he used a tree at the corner of my property. Thing is, that tree is right in view from the deck of the house next door and children live there. Besides, it just ain't sanitary or necessary.

This summer I'm gonna photograph anyone doing that and a) post the photo in the clubhouse, b) hand the photo over to the cops, and c) return the favor by finding out where the guy lives and spraying certain scents (e.g., essence de skunk) on his lawn.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Bill D
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 08:10 PM

three women are walking near the 4th tee of a private club. There is a signboard behind which some man is changing clothes, but he can only be seen from the waist down.

1st woman: "he shouldn't be changing there! At least it isn't MY husband!"
2nd woman: "..well, it sure isn't MY husband either!"
3rd woman: "You know, I think we should call security...he isn't even a member of the club!"

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Bobert
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 08:17 PM

Ya'all got teeth??? Well, gol danged...

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: ranger1
Date: 08 Apr 08 - 08:30 PM

The reason you put the lid down is because it's there. If they didn't want you to put it down, they wouldn't have included one with the toilet. Besides, what are you going to sit on to clip your toenails?

Apparently, great ranger minds think alike. Not to mention that if I don't put the lid down, the cat tries to drink out of the toilet and usually ends up falling in. And where else would one trim one's toenails?

As for the TP, Gnu is so absolutely right.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 10:28 AM

I've never understood why there is even a debate. Of course the TP goes over, not under. Even Archie Bunker knew that. I remember him yelling at Meathead about it one time.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: gnu
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 10:33 AM

Now, there was a disagreement! Every week... and they were hilarious.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Donuel
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 12:19 PM

Why do all our Senators refer to Iraq as Arab soil?

If it is anything it is Persian sand...not Arab.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 12:28 PM

I think you are mixing up Iraq and Iran. And you aren't even President.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: GUEST,highlandman
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 12:46 PM

In my house the TP goes on whichever way I'm holding it when I get the wrapper off.
And if you (editorial 'you' of course) come into the loo in the dark of night and launch your a$$ at it without looking it's not my fault you fall in.
But if you sit on the lid to clip your toenails, where do the clippings go?
I feel so much better now.
-Glenn

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Donuel
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 12:52 PM

Dem. Sen.B called Iraq 'Arab soil' during yesterday's Petraous meeting..
I thought both Iraq and Iran both belong to the Mesopotamian region of ancient Persia.


and yes I am no better a public speaker than fearless leader W.
but at least I can write and try to read.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Peace
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 01:08 PM

More importantly, Don, you know how to think.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: gnu
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 01:25 PM

"We don't need no thinking presidents!" Big Oil.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: GUEST,highlandman
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 01:55 PM

Iraq is culturally and linguistically Arab, but ethnically (majority) Aramaic. So I have read anyway; I lack the time or the courage to do the field research. The territory was indeed part of the Persian empire for a time.
Iran remains culturally, linguistically and ethnically descended from the Persians.
Of course these are over-generalizations. Iraq in particular has been trampled over so many times by various warring empires that it has one of the most diverse populations in the Middle East.
-Glenn
PS what happened to the TP argument?

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Peace
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 01:58 PM

"PS what happened to the TP argument? "

It was wiped out.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: John on the Sunset Coast
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 02:16 PM

Not only has the area we call Iraq been trampled over by many empires, it has also been the trampler over empires. The various iterations of Assyria and Babylonia were quite aggressive, vis-a-vis Egypt, the Levant, what is now Eastern Turkey and what is now Armenia. Whether these empires consisted of the same genetic stock of modern Iraq is a question for the scientists, but unlike Egyptian mummies, I'm not sure there are a lot of 4000 year old Mesopotamian human remains available for checking.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: KB in Iowa
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 03:34 PM

But how did they hang their TP?

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: McGrath of Harlow
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 07:09 PM

We keep ours upright on a kind of stick thingy, a bit like this.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: SINSULL
Date: 09 Apr 08 - 07:32 PM

I love you, gnu. You can always be counted on to instigate the most profound and deeply moving (heh heh) discussions.
Live alone and there is no discussion on seats up or down, toilet paper in or out, or the proper method of loading a dishwasher.
Plus you can usually sleep though the snoring.
SINS

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Bryn Pugh
Date: 10 Apr 08 - 08:15 AM

So do we, McGrath. Apparently the stick thingio is called a playboy.

I don't know why, but I'll lay seven to two that a 'Catter does.

Watch this space.

I am minded of the bog wall grafitto :

When you use this marble hall
Use the paper, not the wall.
It really is a dirty trick
To wipe your arse on half a brick.

Aren't corn cobs somewhat abrasive on the piles (haemorrhoids) ?

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Apr 08 - 09:36 AM

We have avoided all controversy on this subject by taping one end to the ceiling and letting the stuff unroll completely down to the floor. This way you have no "inside" or "outside" and it saves the wear and tear of argument.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Becca72
Date: 10 Apr 08 - 12:10 PM

Amen, Sins

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: maeve
Date: 10 Apr 08 - 10:20 PM

Yet not even gnu has addressed the issue of the decoratively-folded leading end of the correctly positioned roll. One folds under the two leading corners forming a tidy right angle in the center. The effect is that of an arrow pointing down, conveniently indicating the correct direction in which to pull said end.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: jacqui.c
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 07:58 AM

Now there's anal for you!

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: maeve
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 08:03 AM

Jacqui dear,

How would one classify the use of crocheted or needlepoint tp covers for the extra rolls? Hmmm?

hee hehe

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: jacqui.c
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 08:29 AM

Maeve - that was just EVIL - a ghastly gift that HAD to be put on show to avoid giving offence to the giver.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 09:38 AM

We have one designed like a little yellow crocheted top hat with a white bow in front.

It lives in the linen closet. Someday I'll put it on a snowman and see if he comes alive like Frosty did. If he does I bet he'll be sexually confused.

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Highlandman
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 03:52 PM

My dear grandmother used to buy these little naked barbie-doll-ish things and crochet them up inside a sort of a hoop skirt with a little bodice and cap... the doll's legs get stuffed down in the core of the TP roll and the skirt covers it up. Hideous. Every cousin and aunt and uncle in the vast extended family has them in every loo in every house -- you can't escape the little beasts, especially since Nana has long since passed on and they have achieved relic status.
-G

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Emma B
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 04:23 PM

The perfect gifts

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Emma B
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 04:25 PM

and for that reaaly special occasion

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: skarpi
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 05:12 PM

Jesus Maria Magdalena !!! have you nothing else to do with your time folks ??

How many trees do you need to make this toiletpaper ?
and how many do you put down instead ?

oh dear oh dear .


I will but down 100 hundred trees down this spring .
what about you ??

Give the earth back what we take folks .

:>))

ATB Skarpi Iceland

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Newport Boy
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 05:20 PM

It's no use boasting, skarpi - I've been to Iceland, and I know how to find my way out if I get lost in an Icelandic forest.

(scroll down)























I stand up!!

Phil

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: Rapparee
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 05:48 PM

Believe it or not, a high percentage of toilet paper is made from recycled paper. Also, there's not as much paper in it as you might think -- a lot of air is stirred in so that it is "soft and puffy" and, more importantly, breaks down faster. A lot of engineering goes into making toilet paper!

Subject: RE: BS: So many disagreements and controversies...
From: skarpi
Date: 11 Apr 08 - 06:33 PM

LOL hee hee phil this realy an old one LOL , but this is among other reason we plants over three million trees here in Iceland every year .


ATB Skarpi