BS: Joke thread for 2023

Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 01 Jan 23 - 09:01 AM

My seven-year-old grandson got a kids' joke book for Christmas. He just told me this one:

"Why did the boy fall off his bike?

Because his mother threw a refrigerator at him."

I think I'll avoid any further books from that publisher!

Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: gillymor
Date: 01 Jan 23 - 08:58 AM

It's a long way to...

Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: MudGuard
Date: 01 Jan 23 - 08:54 AM

> Are peccadilloes them little flutes?

NO, it is a place in London ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 01 Jan 23 - 06:48 AM

Seasonal and possibly repeated jokes

How does good king Wenceleslas like his pizza?

Deep pan. Crisp and even.


Bethehem- the first Noel

Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: Dave the Gnome
Date: 01 Jan 23 - 05:57 AM

Are peccadilloes them little flutes?

Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 31 Dec 22 - 06:03 PM

Strictly for Brit humour, especially if you're a scouser, doubly especially if you're a Liverpool fan:

A wayside pulpit outside a local church in Liverpool, in the late 1960s:

'Jesus Saves!'

Some wag wrote below it, 'St John knocks in the rebound'...

Another one said, 'What will you do when Jesus returns?' Someone added 'Move St. John to inside right!'

[For the non-cognoscenti, you poor things, Ian St John was a legendary Liverpool goal-scorer in the sixties]

Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 31 Dec 22 - 03:05 PM

Hmm. Didn't take long for my well-meaning thread to be hijacked by a pair of humourless tossers, did it?

Anyway, ploughing on...

Doctor, doctor! I've got a lettuce stuck up me bum!

Hmm, lessee... Well, I can see it's just the tip of the iceberg...

Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: Donuel
Date: 31 Dec 22 - 02:34 PM

What was Steven Hawking's last words?

The windows xp log out sound

Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 31 Dec 22 - 11:41 AM

Hmm.. That seems to imply that you don't know what "peccadillo" means... Now stop your snarling and tell us a joke!

Did you hear about the chameleon who forgot how to change colour?

He had a reptile dysfunction...

Subject: RE: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: Mr Red
Date: 31 Dec 22 - 11:25 AM

You're a control freak. Pissing into the wind.
Now how are you going to enforce your peccadilloes ?

Subject: BS: Joke thread for 2023
From: Steve Shaw
Date: 31 Dec 22 - 11:13 AM

I start this thread with trepidation.

Call me Mr Control Freak, but I have a very strict rule for this thread.

Are you listening?

Ahem... here it is...

THIS IS A JOKE THREAD (Glad I got that off my chest...)

I went to the doc on Thursday. He told me he had good news and bad news.

"The good news is that your test results tell me that you still have 48 hours to live."

"No! That's good news? So what's the bad news, Doc?"

"I forgot to tell you this when I saw you on Tuesday..."