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BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!

Little Hawk 18 Dec 09 - 12:36 PM
SINSULL 18 Dec 09 - 12:42 PM
fretless 18 Dec 09 - 12:43 PM
Little Hawk 18 Dec 09 - 12:49 PM
Rapparee 18 Dec 09 - 12:49 PM
SINSULL 18 Dec 09 - 12:51 PM
Little Hawk 18 Dec 09 - 12:53 PM
Lonesome EJ 18 Dec 09 - 01:07 PM
GUEST,non-active member 18 Dec 09 - 01:16 PM
Uncle_DaveO 18 Dec 09 - 02:10 PM
Charley Noble 18 Dec 09 - 04:31 PM
robomatic 18 Dec 09 - 05:00 PM
Q (Frank Staplin) 18 Dec 09 - 05:08 PM
Bee-dubya-ell 18 Dec 09 - 05:24 PM
Big Mick 18 Dec 09 - 05:28 PM
catspaw49 18 Dec 09 - 10:43 PM
CarolC 19 Dec 09 - 01:11 AM
Georgiansilver 19 Dec 09 - 04:27 AM
Little Hawk 19 Dec 09 - 09:21 AM
MGM·Lion 19 Dec 09 - 10:13 AM
SINSULL 19 Dec 09 - 10:14 AM
Ed T 19 Dec 09 - 12:07 PM
WalkaboutsVerse 19 Dec 09 - 12:22 PM
Uncle_DaveO 19 Dec 09 - 03:09 PM
Little Hawk 19 Dec 09 - 03:45 PM
Ed T 19 Dec 09 - 04:55 PM
Ed T 19 Dec 09 - 04:58 PM
SINSULL 19 Dec 09 - 05:19 PM
frogprince 19 Dec 09 - 07:44 PM
Dave MacKenzie 19 Dec 09 - 08:00 PM
Bobert 19 Dec 09 - 08:22 PM
GUEST,999 19 Dec 09 - 08:25 PM
Ed T 19 Dec 09 - 10:06 PM
GUEST,999 19 Dec 09 - 11:16 PM
Ed T 20 Dec 09 - 12:19 AM
Little Hawk 20 Dec 09 - 07:45 PM
Ed T 20 Dec 09 - 07:47 PM
GUEST,999 21 Dec 09 - 03:14 AM
Gurney 21 Dec 09 - 03:44 PM
SINSULL 21 Dec 09 - 04:13 PM
Ed T 21 Dec 09 - 04:23 PM
Dave MacKenzie 21 Dec 09 - 05:50 PM
Little Hawk 21 Dec 09 - 06:02 PM
GUEST,Peter Laban 22 Dec 09 - 05:43 AM

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Subject: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 12:36 PM

Now THIS is funny! LOL! The local people's response to it is even funnier.

A California neighborhood reportedly is up in arms after a resident decorated his lawn with a depiction of Jesus shooting Santa Claus.

The controversial Christmas display shows Jesus pointing a double-barrel shotgun at Santa's dead body as Rudolph lays sprawled across the hood of a pickup truck nearby, WNCT reported.

Neighbors in Nipomo, Calif., called for the display to be removed, but its maker Ron Lake called it a work of art — in which Santa represents the commercialization of Christmas, the station reported.

"It's an expression of my repressed creativity," Lake told WNCT.

Police said that because Lake built the display on private property they cannot force him to take it down. Some residents plan to start a petition, the station reported.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: SINSULL
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 12:42 PM

The only thing about it that bothers me is the anachronism. The double barreled shotgun did not exist in Jesus' time. Catapults, sling shots, poison - all would have worked for a more realistic scene.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: fretless
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 12:43 PM

So where's the picture?


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 12:49 PM

I see what you mean, SINSULL. Still, Jesus transcends the barriers of time, right? And Jesus in America has simply GOT to wield some kind of heavy firepower in the form of a good ol' American gun, dontcha think? The shotgun sounds perfect to me.

If you wanted to go Biblical, though, either a sling (a la David and Goliath) or a bloodstained broadsword would do the trick.

I think adding a dead Rudolph on the hood of the pickup is a brilliant touch, and I can't wait to see photos.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Rapparee
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 12:49 PM

Friend of mine wanted to get one of those mechanical Santas that laugh and bend from the waist and put it on his roof with a Baby Jesus under the automaton's arm.

Never did, though.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: SINSULL
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 12:51 PM

I'd have gone for a David and Goliath type scene with a tall willowy Jesus brandishing a sling shot while a short chubby Claus lies on the ground with a piece of coal lodged in his forehead. Might as well get Frosty at the same time. In fact, I would have a horrified one-eyed Frosty looking on.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 12:53 PM

OH, that's great! Bravo! ;-D


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Lonesome EJ
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 01:07 PM

How about a tableau featuring a tattooed Christ in an octagon ring putting a submission hold on a bloodied Santa Claus while a looped recording of Joe Rogan plays repeatedly praising His ju jitsu and wondering why Claus didn't keep the action in a stand up game where his mighty left hook could have won the match. I could picture a robotic Bruce Buffer wearing a halo and wings, raising Christ's arm in victory while somebody jams a Tap Out cap on his head.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: GUEST,non-active member
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 01:16 PM

Video


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 02:10 PM

Sinsull commented:


The only thing about it that bothers me is the anachronism. The double barreled shotgun did not exist in Jesus' time.


But then the basic scenario of the display is built on anachronism: Jesus in the flesh, in today's Santa-containing world. If he can assassinate Santa, he can presumably use any weapon available in a Santa timeframe. And if Rudolph is in the display, it has to be at or after whatever year it was in the 40s that Rudolph was grafted onto the Santa legend.

Dave Oesterreich


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Charley Noble
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 04:31 PM

Thanks for posting the video above.

How often I've been tempted to create a display like that myself!

Charley Noble


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: robomatic
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 05:00 PM

By Kinky Friedman:

Well, a redneck nerd in a bowling shirt was a-guzzlin' lone star beer
Talking religion and-uh politics for all the world to hear.
They oughta send you back to russia, boy, or new york city one
You just want to diddle a Kirstian girl and you killed god's only son.¡

I said, has it occurred to you, you nerd, that that's not very nice,
We jews believe it was santa claus that killed jesus christ.
you know, you don't look jewish,¡± he said, ¡°near as i could figger
I had you lamped for a slightly anemic, well-dressed country nigger.

No, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore,
They don't turn the other cheek the way they done before.
He started in to shoutin' and a-spittin' on the floor,
lord, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore.

He says, i ain't a racist but aristittle onassis is one greek we don't need
And them niggers, jews and sigma nus, all they ever do is breed.
And wops 'n micks 'n slopes 'n spics 'n spooks are also on my list
And there's one little hebe from the heart of texas is there anyone i missed ?

Well, i hits him with everything i had right square between the eyes.
I says, i'm gonna gitcha, you son of a bitch ya, for spoutin' that pack of lies.
If there's one thing i can't abide, it's an ethnocentric racist;
Now you take back that thing you said 'bout aristitle onassis.

No, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore,
We don't turn the other cheek the way we done before.
You could hear that honky holler as he hit that hardwood floor
lord, they sho' ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore!
All right!

No, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore,
We don't turn the other cheek the way they done before.
You hear that honky holler as he hit that hardwood floor
Lord, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore.

Everybody!
They ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore,
They ain't makin' carpenters who know what nails are for.
Well, the whole damn place was singin' as i strolled right out the door
¡°lord, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore!¡±

No, we ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore,
We don't turn the other cheek the way they done before.
Well, the whole damn place was singin' as i strolled right out the door
¡°lord, they ain't makin' jews like jesus anymore!¡±


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Q (Frank Staplin)
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 05:08 PM

A little game- Kill Santa!
Kill Santa


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Bee-dubya-ell
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 05:24 PM

I am in total agreement about the shotgun being anachronistic. Does the guy think Eisenhower is still President or something? Jesus doesn't use a shotgun in 2009!

He uses an AR-15 semi-automatic rifle capable of spitting out 5.56x45mm rounds as fast as He can pull the trigger. Get up to date, dude!


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Big Mick
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 05:28 PM

I have restored the link to the video, but I do so with mixed emotions. In the end I did it because it is helpful to the flow of the conversation, and the "art" makes an important point, whether you agree with that point or not.

But I must tell you that the rules are clear, and it does not make a difference whether folks (no matter how fond I am of them) like them or not. GUEST posts are rarely allowed in BS threads. I know that you are doing this to make a statement, and I know that some don't like the latitude of the Mod's in this. But this is our rule.

Also, I am not going to discuss this further in this thread, nor am I going to allow the thread to be hijacked into a moderating discussion. Feel free to PM me on the issue, but any further in this thread will be deleted.

Thanks,

Mick


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: catspaw49
Date: 18 Dec 09 - 10:43 PM

Ya' know........On the last trash day here. my neighbors across the street put out an otherwise perfect but HEADLESS 5 foot Santa. I was sorely tempted to take it just because it was what it was and HAD to have some use in the future. I thought if I didn't use it, I'd send it to Sins but better judgement won out......well, it won out long enough for me to change my mind and go out to get it only to find someone else had absconded with the Claus before the garbage guys arrived.

Lesson: Always go with your first stupid impulse instead of waiting to act stupidly later.


Spaw


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: CarolC
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 01:11 AM

If you think that's bad, look what Jack Bauer's doing to Santa...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tp19qiash2U


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Georgiansilver
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 04:27 AM

Sadly the scene depicted shows Jesus doing something he would never have done even if shotguns had existed......... In the season of Peace and Goodwill which is representative of the birth of Jesus..... the thought of Him depicted holding a shotgun is unacceptable to me.... or a slingshot or any other weapon apart from 'Love'
Best wishes of the season to you all, Mike.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 09:21 AM

Yes, of course, if one is to talk seriously about Jesus then that is quite correct, GS.

This display, however, is a satirical display meant to be a comment about the modern commercialism of Christmas and how that is opposed to the original spiritual concept of Christams. It cannot be taken as a serious comment on the personal nature of Jesus.

At least I hope that's what the guy meant... ;-)


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: MGM·Lion
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 10:13 AM

Agreed, LH - but don't you agree there must have been an element of - to put it at its mildest possible - mischievous provocation in the intent, no matter how 'satirical' the guy may claim it to have been? He meant to upset people, no two ways about it. Whether this was in any way a justifiable aim is a matter for debate; but I am sure I am right that such an intention was present.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: SINSULL
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 10:14 AM

I don't know, GS. I can see him going postal as he casts out the whited sepulchre merchants in the temple.


Uncle DaveO - you know I was being facetious, right?

Spaw - who do you think got that headless Santa? it was on my radar long before you saw it.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Ed T
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 12:07 PM

I saw Jesus killing Sante Claus
    On a lawn near a 'fornia Christmas tree last night.
    Dads and Moms they all freaked
    As they went outside to peek
    And, rednecks were all tucked up
    In their pick-ups fast asleep.

    Then, I saw Rudolph sprawled out on a hood
    And Santa shooting wild in old west rage
    Now, God's son held a gun
    A NRA sticker on his bum
    As Arnie in his mansion was caroling in his sleep

    I saw Jesus shoot'in Santa Claus
    On a lawn near a 'fornia Xmas Tree last night.
    Dads and Moms they kinda freaked
    As the kids looked out to peek;
    And, the rednecks were all tucked up
    In their pick-ups fast asleep
   
    Then, I heard carolers singing out aloud
    For Gods sake Ron, won't you "take it down"
    And, Ron 'plied it was art,
    and he didn't give a fart
    "Cause Santa's magic's fucked up
    By the big department stores

   I dreamed Arnie saved old Sante Clause
   Runn'in over God in Hummer rage
   What a joy it would have been
   If we only I had seen
   California's take on Sante Clause last night


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 12:22 PM

I wouldn't go that far, but!..

Poem 224 of 230: THE NATIVITY

Vis-à-vis S.C.,
    I prefer to see
Christian children's glee
    When they play-out the
Coming of J.C. -
    The Nativity.

From http://blogs.myspace.com/walkaboutsverse (e-book)
Or http://walkaboutsverse.sitegoz.com (e-scroll)
(C) David Franks 2003


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 03:09 PM

MtheGM's comment was, in part:

there must have been an element of - to put it at its mildest possible - mischievous provocation in the intent, no matter how 'satirical' the guy may claim it to have been?

Of course there was "an element of mischievous provocation"! That's what satire is: mischievous provocation!

Dave Oesterreich


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 03:45 PM

There was undoubtedly an element of mischievous provocation. He wanted to upset some people and amuse others, and he has succeeded...perhaps to a greater extent than he had intended.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Ed T
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 04:55 PM

Not so great Nativity scenes:
http://www.goingjesus.com/cavalcade1.shtml


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Ed T
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 04:58 PM

Another odd concept, but maybe its the thought that counts:
http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Strange-News/UK-A-nativity-scene-made-out-of-vegetables-on-display/Article/200812115173538


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: SINSULL
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 05:19 PM

Jesus is a carrot. In the original "The Thing" wasn't Jim Arness a giant potato?

Ed - those nativity scenes make the Santa massacre look tasteful. Thank you for sharing.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: frogprince
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 07:44 PM

I really can't blame anyone else for this one
                      Dean


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Dave MacKenzie
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 08:00 PM

I'm still trying to work out who complained. Couldn't be Christians 'cos it shows Christ triumphing over Mammon.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Bobert
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 08:22 PM

Great art piece!!! Purdy much says it all...

B~


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: GUEST,999
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 08:25 PM

The scene wot started it all.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Ed T
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 10:06 PM

I suspect that, if asked, a percentage of Christians would somewhat agree that Santa played a historic role in Christianity....though I am unsure of the role they would state, and the percentage that believe it. If you put Santa in the Nativity scene, maybe few would protest?


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: GUEST,999
Date: 19 Dec 09 - 11:16 PM

Maybe they think the guy with the gun is meant to portray Dicky Cheney and that's what they're upset about?


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Ed T
Date: 20 Dec 09 - 12:19 AM

?
http://www.welcomethelight.com/2009/12/christmas-is-canceled-dick-cheney-shoots-santa-in-the-face/


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 20 Dec 09 - 07:45 PM

A friend of mine had a great idea for an "answer" display to the guy in California who has done the display of Jesus shooting Santa Claus. One of his neighbours could do this:

Build a replica of a boxing ring. Surround it with a wildly gesticulating "audience" of hundreds of snowmen wearing fedoras and toques and scarves. Inside the ring we see Jesus wearing boxing gloves and lying sprawled unconscious on the canvas, clearly the victim of a knockout. At the center of the ring we see the Ref raising Santa's arm in victory, Santa (also wearing boxing gloves) having won by a KO in Round 3 (indicated by the usual sign).

This would be a spectacular answer to the first display, and would probably provoke further angry protests and demonstrations by offended people. With any luck this could be the biggest single news item of the entire holiday season, and could later be made into an animated film...

Disney wouldn't touch it, so I'm thinking...Pixar.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Ed T
Date: 20 Dec 09 - 07:47 PM

I like the boxing idea....if you could build Don King into it...waving his USA flags in the background.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: GUEST,999
Date: 21 Dec 09 - 03:14 AM

Too late.

YouTube - JESUS vs SANTA


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Gurney
Date: 21 Dec 09 - 03:44 PM

A church in Auckland had a hoarding, Mary and Joseph in bed. Mary had a wistful look on her face, and Joseph looked disgruntled.
The caption was: 'God is a hard act to follow!'

It occasioned great disgust among the religious-minded, and was promptly defaced.

The radio was full of it, but no-one, no-one, seems to have pointed out that she supposedly gave VIRGIN birth, everyone instead jumping to the conclusion that God had engaged in sexual congress.

A hard sell is only a hard sell, no matter who does it.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: SINSULL
Date: 21 Dec 09 - 04:13 PM

Santa is St Nicholas, no? Sounds Christian to me.

Saint Nicholas (Greek: ¢ãéïò Íéêüëáïò , Agios ["saint"] Nikolaos ["victory of the people"]) (270 - 6 December 346) is the common name for Nicholas of Myra, a saint and Bishop of Myra (Demre, in Lycia, part of modern-day Turkey). Because of the many miracles attributed to his intercession, he is also known as Nicholas the Wonderworker. He had a reputation for secret gift-giving, such as putting coins in the shoes of those who left them out for him, and thus became the model for Santa Claus, whose English name comes from the Dutch Sinterklaas[citation needed]. His reputation evolved among the faithful, as is common for early Christian saints.[3] In 1087, his relics were furtively translated to Bari, in southeastern Italy; for this reason, he is also known as, Nicholas of Bari.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Ed T
Date: 21 Dec 09 - 04:23 PM

From the Wondercafe.ca

Nativity scene with a difference
Posted on: 12/14/2009 03:38

A member of our congregation is a sculptor by profession. He was asked by our minister to create a nativity scene for Christmas. As we are a progressive Christian congregation, I expected something a little controversial, but folks, I'm still reeling!

Mary wasn't the problem. True, she did look like she was an icon from the Greek Orthodox tradition, rather than the more traditional Catholic Mary.

Ah, but the little baby Jesus. There, nestling in His mother Mary's arms, was a not very appealing little monkey.

Now, I understood the significance, we are a progressive congregation that fully supports evolution theory. I also support artistic freedom when it comes to interpretation - but the truth is I'm not a happy camper when it comes to replacing the baby Jesus with a monkey.

It's made me realise how complex a lot of our views are.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Dave MacKenzie
Date: 21 Dec 09 - 05:50 PM

Yes, Saint Nicholas wsa a Christian saint, but he has given little apart from his name to Santa Claus.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: Little Hawk
Date: 21 Dec 09 - 06:02 PM

Kind of like Saint Hubbins, the patron saint of quality footwear. The only thing he has given us is a cool connection to relate to 1/3 of the lineup in Spinal Tap.


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Subject: RE: BS: Jesus Guns Down Santa!!!
From: GUEST,Peter Laban
Date: 22 Dec 09 - 05:43 AM

Sinterklaas, patron saint of children, mariners, bankers, pawn-brokers, scholars, orphans, laborers, travelers, merchants, judges, paupers, marriageable maidens, prostitutes, students, sailors, victims of judicial mistakes, captives, perfumers, thieves and murderers

anyhow, the Irish have put in a claim, trying to oust Bari, see irish Times article


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