BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Maryrrf
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 04:32 PM

Coming in late to this thread, Gnu - I hope your recovery proceeds quickly and smoothly! Best wishes and Happy Holidays!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: GUEST,LTS pretending to work
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 09:14 AM

Take care dear, hope all is healing well.

I'm glad you went for the staples, they would have been my choice too.. Having experienced both after a C section (birth and subsequent repair after infection), I'd recommend staples over stithes for ease of removal and less pain.

Now watch how you go and don't be doing anything silly like shouting at the 'Jays or sommat....

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Beer
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 08:37 AM

I'll raise a cup to you at midnight.
All the best.
Beer (adrien)

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Megan L
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 04:53 AM

never mind Gnu you dont look quite so chipmunkish now

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 24 Dec 07 - 04:39 AM

Me too, jac. Just a slight burning sensation for a couple of seconds. Of course, the nerves were cut. I'd rather have the pain than no feeling around the ear as I live where it gets a tad cold in winter. When the right side was done, I joked that I could only walk crosswind to the left. Time for a bushy beard, I guess.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 23 Dec 07 - 01:38 PM

Thanks for the update Gnu - I know about the staples and the itching - I really did get paranoid about having them taken out but they did it with no pain whatsoever.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Bee
Date: 23 Dec 07 - 12:53 PM

My dear man, that sounds absolutely excruciating to me - my face hurts just reading about it.

By the way... I do like a man with a beard, so y'oughta just let it grow. Then you can look intelligent and thoughtful while gently scritching the itchy spots, instead of just a bit scrofulous. ;-D

Here's wishing you a good Christmas, lots of healing, and a bunch of good buddies to help you celebrate.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: ranger1
Date: 23 Dec 07 - 08:58 AM

Well, all this has made interesting reading before morning coffee. Sorry I'm late to the party, Gnu. As Jacqui is always saying to Seamus (and Kendall): HEAL!

And try not to get overly animated when the Pats play, eh?

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 23 Dec 07 - 08:14 AM

It must be the weekend. I had about ten PM's and emails asking me for an update since yesterday morning, so.......

The recoup is going well. Far better than when the other side was done in 2005. I can turn my head about thirty degrees each way and the same up and down without any pain, as long as I don't do it too often. I still have to lay semi-prone and rest my neck every hour or so unless I am just sitting. Otherwise, when the pain does come, it takes a while to sort out. I can even lift my head without the aid of my arm if I am not sitting back any more than about twenty degrees. Glad I bought that Lazyboy recliner-rocker on sale in October just in case. Sleeping on the couch propped up with pillows is a drag. Especially if ya roll over while asleep! That is my story and I am stickin to it.

I did have a copule of days of frequent dull and sharp pains but these eased yesterday. Now they are sporadic. The itching from the incision, from the staples and from the "dripping" of the Polysporin (antibiotic ointment with a consistency of vaseline) and from the now nine days of beard growth has been driving me nuts as I can't scratch near the incision. Plus, due to nerve damage, it isn't easy to figure out where to scratch. Hehehe... sometimes, the pain from the incision under the ear feels like someone has me by the top of the ear with pliars. Wakes ya right up!

Got the staples out Friday. Only a dozen staples this time and the nurse only pinched me once. Just one spot with a half a drop of blood. And, she was pleasant!! Could have been that it was her last working day before two weeks vacation.

No progress with nerve damage and scar tissue from the Nov 23 operation. But, combined with the nerve damage from the Dec 14 operation, the left side of my face is "consistent". The mouth, cheek, eyelid and forhead all "doop" or "not move" in unison. Hehehe... I can only look surprised if you are standing to the right of me. The doc said, "Hey, in Hollywood, they get botox for that." Somehow, that didn't make me laugh... well, maybe a half a laugh.

So, one week down. One more to go being housebound. Then another four with no more than walking, light meals, dishes, etc. I might even be able to sleep in my bed by then. We will see about the scar and nerve damage as time goes on. Might heal, might not. Thank goodness I am good-lookin to begin with.

Thanks again to all who posted, PM'd, emailed, chatted... each has been a source of comfort and has lifted my spirits. And, the comments and jokes have raised my eyebrow more than once.

Merry HOHO!!!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 12:13 PM

Yes, Mary.... EGGSACTLY!

My uncle was in Currehoea, G.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 12:10 PM

Cure for diarrhoea?

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: SINSULL
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 12:08 PM

Egg salad, devilled eggs, egg slices, egg dices, chef salad,hmmmm

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 12:02 PM

Well, this here doing nothing since 3:30AM is kinda boring. I visited friends via internut for a while. I read for a bit. Tried to rest my neck and have a nap, to no avail. I even hard boiled a dozen eggs so I would have something to do, like think about what to do with a dozen boiled eggs. Well, eleven eggs actually, on accounta one use came to mind right away.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Bee
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 08:51 AM

Good to hear you're healin'. Hope you've got somebody to clear out the snow and ice for you, as well. And after this, don't be stickin' yer tongue on frozen metal things!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 08:00 AM

Severn... I swear, one of these days yer gonna break yer punny bone. Thanks for the chuckles, buddy.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Severn
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 07:40 AM

Correction. That sould have read the Gary-Goreyin' Monks.

And tell that 7th Cavalry band to stop playing that Gary Owens March. He's survived the last stand as the last sranding and has ridden out of the valley on his Owen Power.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vocation; Gimmie a brick eh!
From: Severn
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 07:07 AM

I had the Gregorian Chip Monks Chanting for your health as soon as they'd finished cooking the Fish. I usually don't leave a thing to chants, but your health is at stake here and your Russian-born nurse with the delusions of former nobility, Anna-sthesia, seemed to have gotten her job by not being good enough to be a stewardess for Err Canada. If she'd actually gotten to work for the airline, she would surely have lost your whole cause for you at baggage check, though gotten it back to you a day later. No wonder Canadian medicine is most famous for those hats in Alberta.

Congradulations on making it through this far through the system. You'll be as close to normal as ever in no time, flat. Did the doc say you'd ever be able to play the 'hran again?. Sometimes these medical miracles DO make a man "Bodhran Again"!

Halle-gnujah! The Great Re-Gnu-al has begun!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Janie
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 06:03 AM

Hurray, he lives!

Janie

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 05:50 AM

Glad to hear you are home and safe, take care, rest up and don't pick it.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 17 Dec 07 - 03:32 AM

Hmmmmm. In the recovery room, Nurse Morphine kept wiping her nose on her rubber gloves. She said, a couple of times, "Oh, I've got the sniffles." I just remembered this after waking up an hour ago with sniffles and a much more sore, scratchy throat and persistent cough. I guess she didn't see the BIG displays at every entrance and in every waiting room, complete with free masks, waterless handwashing soap, sanitary handwipe packets, and large writing in both official languages.

I got 5 or 6 hours sleep in total with only one 500mg tylenol. And, my eye is not twitching nor is it weeping near as much as yesterday. So, I am well on my way. Now, if I could only figure out where to scratch my neck so that it would relieve the itch on the back of my ear.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: bfdk
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 05:07 PM

One can hope, Ernest, one can only hope.. ;-)

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 04:51 PM

What a lot of welcome blather, just to tell us you're home! We cross posted too, so I didn't know you were back until just now. (I was Being Patient unnecessarily, Giok!)

We're glad you're home, glad they left your sense of humor with you, glad you can go rest up a bit.

maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Ernest
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 04:46 PM

Welcome back gnu - and good luck weathering out the storm...and the aftermath of your vacation!

Best wishes

Ernest

P.S.: Bente, do you really think gnu`s are obeying better than dachshounds???? ;0)

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 02:11 PM

Who's a cheeky boy then?

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: bfdk
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 01:56 PM

Welcome back from your "vacation", gnu, glad to hear you're back in your own home again. Now listen carefully - and obey for once....

Heal, Boy!!

Green's is relaxing, so I've been told ;-)

Best wishes,

Bente

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Jeri
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 01:44 PM

He got out.
So Gnu, does this mean you're going to be pretty?

The trick is to prepare for the test beforeyou go in:

What is your name?
A1: Gnu
A2: You tell me YOURS first
A3: George Clooney. Wanna go out?

Do you know where you are?
A1: Auntie Em? Oh, Auntie Em, I had the STRANGEST dream!
A2: Feels like a bed
A3: Dunno. The last thing I remember was being in the escape pod after the Orglobphians exclumed the ship's swole with a eptheron torpedo.

Can you sit up?
A: Not unless you give me a treat

Can you pee?
A: Dunno - give me a sec... (your expression is important)

Are you having any pain?
I think you already came up with the best answer.

Seriously, I'm glad everything went reasonably well and your sense of humor survived intact. You'll have to come down here for a visit sometime!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Megan L
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 01:27 PM

Man Gnu yev got some neck wie the cheek ye gie us. Mind you hopefully after this weekend ye wilny hae quite sae much o it awra best china

Frae Dauvitt and his Meg

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 01:26 PM

G... got home just before the storm... should start soon... but, only 25cm and 70kph, then rain, so, not bad. I told the doc I wanted to go home before the storm and he agreed. Better than staying where I was... I hope.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 01:19 PM

I might be wrong though :)

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 01:18 PM

Think about it folks, he lives alone, and they may not feel he's ready to cope alone yet, the weather is bad, and he may not be fit enough to go home yet anyway.
At least we're all thinking about him, so that should help.


Mudcat Power

Giok

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 01:15 PM

...patiently!

maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 01:15 PM

Well, what a rip off! I am already home. The only "extended" rest I got was when the activities dierector decided I needed some extra initial therapy… almost two hours extra. Of course, that meant that I also got to spend some extra time "recovering", where there was someone at my side for three hours and, every ten minutes, she squeezed my arm real hard, made me do some kinda calming breathing stuff and cough, move my legs… gee whiz… I was plumb tuckered out!

Then, instead of the relaxing and serene peace I expected when I requested a nice room like I have been in before, they put me in a room with "Observation" written on the door and it was directly across from a large staff office. Not only was that kinda noisy, there were two other vacationers in the same room and they were really noisy… moaning and groaning (some people will complain about anything, eh?) and they were hooked up to fancy machines with lights flashing and making all sorts of beeping noises.

There was even a full time "observer" with her own office right in the room. Only, she didn't just observe. She was near as bad as the one who "recovered" me. Wouldn't let me sleep for any more than a half hour at a time until the activities dierector checked me out Saturday morning. But, I was given lots of stuff to really relax me, even though I had to get injected with it, on accounta they had me on a no food, no liquid diet until yesterday.

Anyway, a little while ago, the activities dierector disconnected me from a couple of tubes thay had hooked up to me so I didn't have to do much and said that I was rested up enough to go home, as long as I promised to do as little as possible until the end of January. Just preparing light meals, doing dishes, using stairs as little as possible… At least I won't have someone sticking things in me at all hours and asking me stupid questions… What is your name? Do you know where you are? Can you sit up? Can you pee? Are you having any pain?

Are you having pain? Guess. What? I said, "Yes." Do you want some morpine? No… I want a lot of morphine. Stupid question!

So, I will know in a couple of weeks just how things went. Hopefully, my ear will get back to it's normal size and not stick out over twice as far as the other one, the dents in my cheek will flatten out and the scar tissue inside will normalize, my left eye will open a bit more and stop weeping, and my lipths will work better. And, I'll be much more rested.

Thanks again for all the kind words and thoughts.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 12:56 PM

No gnus yet then? We're all waiting.......

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 09:25 AM

I know, Giok. It'll be a bit of a welcome when he does check in. Thanks.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 08:49 AM

Patience lassie, he won't be home yet, even if he does get out today.
We is all 'jes' a-waitin' here for gnu' ♫♫

G.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 16 Dec 07 - 08:45 AM

Toes tap, tap, tapping... I'm being PATIENT!

Sorry about that.

Waiting paaatiennnnntlyyyyyyyyyyy for good gnu's good news.

Taaap, taaap, tap,tap,tap...Taaap, taaap, tap,tap,tap,...Taaap, taaap, tap,tap,tap,...Tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap...




maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Peace
Date: 15 Dec 07 - 04:48 PM

Yo, Gnu, howzit?

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 15 Dec 07 - 12:44 PM

Thanks, Giok. We'll be waiting!

maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 15 Dec 07 - 06:42 AM

He's still in hospital, as far as I know he won't get out before Sunday.
G

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 15 Dec 07 - 06:37 AM

Good morning to gnu,
Good morning to gnu,
We hope you're home and healing;
And we miss you, too.


(Corny, but true!)

maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 14 Dec 07 - 06:25 PM

Has anyone gotten word from gnu yet?

maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: skarpi
Date: 14 Dec 07 - 02:27 PM

well gnu should be up by now , hope everthing went well ,

heal well my friend

All the best Skarpi Iceland

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 14 Dec 07 - 08:40 AM

You're eating Christmas dinner in the wrong place, gnu. We can do a wicked good dinner in Maine.

Remember that a boatload of Mudcatters are praying/thinking/glowing in the appropriate directions, and that we'll be looking for notice that you are doing well. Be extra good to yourself, eh?

maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 14 Dec 07 - 05:49 AM

Love em, Beer. Used to go to Gould's Fried Clams in Shediac, but, some ontapanure bought it about ten years ago and wanted to make money instead of good clams. Now, Deluxe is the best, even in Shediac. We'll get some next summer. And, I know a place in Grande Digue for cohogs (bar clams, big buggers, fer you landlockers) and I'll make a chowder to die for. But, you must have enjoyed the BBQ'd porterhouse last summer, seeing as how you inhaled it. Hehehe. It'll surf and turf next time.

Sorry to prattle on... nervous chatter.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Beer
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 09:45 PM

Jeri? Where you digging up those wonderful, delicious creatures? I can taste them from here (Quebec). Maybe I should jump in the truck and head home.
Gnu!, you like clams? Never mine, you don't have to answer that. Because if you say "No" that ends our friendship.
As Amos says. "Sleep Well".

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Amos
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 09:36 PM

Goo'night ganu. Tomorrow will be ganoher day.

A

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 08:07 PM

Thanks A and Skarpi.

Man oh man, do I need a rest! It's ten to 9PM and I feel like a fart drug through a keg of nails. I have shopped, cooked, organized papers and work, cleaned two houses, and on and on. Still got a few things I have to get done and some I won't.

So, I am looking forward to my early Christmas present tomorrow. Not only that, but, I get to miss the Birthdayssss party on Sunday. Four B'days combined into one loooong, arduous "party" with the kids screeching and the adults hollering at the kids. Then, on Christmas Day, I can arrive late and leave early because I WILL be tired and not feeling well. And, because my jaw will STILL be sore, I won't even have to eat the dry, cold turkey with dressing that has a pound of summer savory in it, or the veggies sopping and dripping with margerine, or that horrible excuse for a cheesecake that would make a coyote with mange puke - if a 'yote would eat it in the first place. This is working out great!

Thanks for the kind words. Like I said, I will answer all the PM's and emails in due time. Right now, it's tylenol time.

gnightgnu

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 03:54 PM

Love oh love, oh calloused love ♫♪

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: skarpi
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 03:50 PM

hallo gnu , I hope you rest well gnu .
All the best Skarpi

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Amos
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 10:23 AM

Heal, you calloused ole sunuvabitch!! Heal!

A

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Jeri
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 10:15 AM

If I had a few thousand extra clams, I'd get you one o' them beds. Hire Cat 'Fooseballs' Spaw to do the design and hire the right people. He'd probably want a Hemi and maybe tail fins. Maybe a 'low rider' type suspension.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 07:47 AM

Maybe they'll give you one already pimped g, like this
G ¦¬]

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: GUEST,LTS pretending to work and failing
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 07:40 AM

The last thing you want to hear as you enter the operating theatre...

'Now nurse, just check on Wikipedia under "inscisions"!'

Take care dear, speak to you soon, and I'll open up the recovery ward just as soon as I can.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 07:01 AM

Hehehe... and old friend PM'd me this.

Thanks old friend.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 13 Dec 07 - 06:55 AM

Jeri... steal towels? Me? No way. I am goin for the bed. Late model, super heavy duty, chrome wheels and rails, multi-positional power adjust... they are fully loaded! I am gonna pimp it up, too. Roll bars, Bosch fog lamps front and rear, a horn that plays stuff like a buck in rut... and, for a touch of class, maybe even some fuzzy dice, or dingle balls, man. It'll be way cool, man.

Jennie... I hope so.

Janie... tttthanks for the vvvvibes.

G... ach, have a wee drop o the pure.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 06:10 PM

I'm tempted to book myself in, Jenny.
G

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Janie
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 06:07 PM

Geez Louise!   All y'all cold climate folks best come join us here in Dixie - seems the northlands is a bit unhealthy these days!

Hope you have a speedy recovery, Gnu - sending good vibes your way.

Janie

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: GUEST,JennieG at work
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 05:48 PM

Geez gnu......be careful.....you know what they do to you in horspittal, they fill you full of mind-altering substances and it's not even the 60s........goodness know where such substances come from.........**

I don't know whether to say "be careful" or "enjoy it!"

Cheers
JennieG

** could be the mushroom patch in the horspittal herb garden

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Jeri
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 05:16 PM

Gnu, don't steal a towel - you can guess what's been on them. Don't eat the lime Jell-o, or probably the rest of the food. I don't know if you'll be able to chew after, but maybe bring a blender and order out for pizza.

Seriously, take care of yourself and come back healthier and without the gizzard.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 04:07 PM

maeve... I like it!

Thanks jac. You take of yourself, too... and whatshisname, eh.

Nurse Ratched is fine with me... I have dealt with Nurse Wretched!

Becca... the only milk I need is the Milk of Human Kindness and there is lots of that around this here Café, thanks to all youse loverly folk.

Beer... it's your fault... you and yer fancy whiskey.

Sev... not more stuff! Dammit man, you are toooooo kind, you, you... nice guy, you. I would try to post that pic somewhere, but many 'Catters have small children and pets which might be near their screens when they bring up the pic.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Severn
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 01:02 PM

You'll just have to revise the Cuckoo's Nest script a little bit.

"....But it's the SUPER BOWL, Nurse Ratched!"

....and your New England Patriots WILL be there!

You could have changed the script to ice fishing, but an earlier post here warned you against it.

I've seen the photos of you looking like Dizzy Gillespe with one cheek. Made me feel better about some things I had to go through. Thy pains were greater than mine.

Presents will be waiting for your return. No WC Fields, mind you, but as my Drill Sargeant in Basic Training used to say, "If you have a problem, see the Chaplain!" (In your case, the Keaton, too!)

Heal, my friend! Just like they taught you in obedience school!

Alas, the estate of the late David Seville could not use an over 50, bearded, lopsided one-cheeked baritone Chipmunk wielding a 'hran for their upcoming Clancy Bros. tribute album, so write home when you find work!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Beer
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 12:04 PM

John.
That is a great idea. Nurse Ratched. Just what Gnu needs. What a wonderful nurse. Maybe she would be available. Gravity would have done a little work on her by now but what the heck, I'm sure her Florence Nightingale approach has been refined.
What a wonderful present.
He! he! he!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Becca72
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 11:13 AM

Ok, that's enough. No more health issues around here, please. We've used up the quota for this month!

Gnu, hope it's a quick recovery, but milk it for all its worth anyway.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 11:06 AM

Call for Nurse Ratched !

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 11:02 AM

Best of luck sweetie - I hope they get you sorted and home in double quick time.

The way things are going we're going to have to open the Mudcat Recovery Ward again before long!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 07:25 AM

For to dihyte a swan:

DESCRIPTION: Roasted swan with Chaudon

There you go, gnu!

maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 06:56 AM

http://www.lyricsandsongs.com/song/589010.html
THE GNU SONG by Flanders & Swan
Found it here

A year ago last Thursday, I was strolling in the zoo
When I met a man who thought he knew the lot
He was laying down the law about the habits of baboons
And the number of quills a porcupine has got
So I asked him "What's that creature's name?" And he answered "That's a helk!"
And I'd have gone on thinking that was true
If the animal in question hadn't put that chap to shame,
And remarked,"I ain't a helk! I'm a gnu!"

"I'm a gnu I'm a gnu
The g-nicest work of g-nature in the zoo
I'm a gnu how do you do?
You really oughtta g-know w-who's w-who
I'm a gnu spelt G - N - U
I'm not a camel or a kangaroo
So let me introduce, I'm neither man nor moose
Oh, g-no, g-no, g-no, I'm a gnu!"

I had taken furnished lodgings down at Rustington-on-sea
Whence I travelled on to Aston-under-lyne
On the second night I stayed there I was wakened from a dream
Which I'll tell you all about some other time
Among the hunting trophies on the wall above my bed
Stuffed and mounted was a face I thought I knew
A bison? An okapi? Could it be a hearty beast?
Then I seem to hear a voice "I'm a gnu!"

"I'm a gnu! a-g-nother gnu!
I wish I could g-nash my teeth at you
I'm a gnu how do you do?
You really oughtta g-know w-who's w-who
I'm a gnu spelt G - N - U
Call me bison or okapi and I'll sue
Nor am I in the least like that dreadful hearty beast
Oh, g-no, g-no, g-no, I'm a gnu!"

"G-no, g-no, g-no, I'm a gnu!
G-no, g-no, g-no, I'm a gnu!"

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 06:36 AM

Mary! Late 60's. I wasn't even a teenage then. Seems to me my Bro's buddy was a Newfie, so, a guess might be a roast or stew.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: SINSULL
Date: 12 Dec 07 - 06:30 AM

gnu,
What did you intend to do with the swan once you caught it?
Inquiring minds want to know.
SINS

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 11 Dec 07 - 04:03 PM

Metchosin... I hope all goes well. Good thoughts and prayers for you. Been years since any lass was thinking about me when having anything done to her breasts. I consider myself honoured!

maeve... ahyup!

Ernest... sounds good. Afterward, we could go here. We just can't mention my last name or the fact that I am Canadian. Imagine, if you can, in the late 1960's, two rather inebriated, young, Canuck airmen, one laughing uncontrolably (my Bro) and the other standing arse deep in the pond holding a swan with an arm around it's body and one hand around it's neck behind it's head, trying to fgigure out how to let it go without the swan beating and biting the crap out of him... AND wondering what made him think it was a good idea in the first place! I'll bet that story is still told there today.

Bill... yeah, I am one lucky pup. Hopefully, I will have good news by Sunday or Monday.

Thanks to all. Makes my day.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Bill D
Date: 11 Dec 07 - 02:51 PM

*tsk*...some folks have ALL the fun!
We'll be looking for good gnus as soon as they let you up...out...whatever. Take care!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Ernest
Date: 11 Dec 07 - 01:54 PM

Maybe we could have a look at this place

http://www.mahet.de/KillarneyTeaser.html

and have a look what it`s like - maybe even have a session there!

Best
Ernest

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 11 Dec 07 - 01:06 PM

There you go, making the poor fellow laugh himself into pain again.

Hi, gnu!

maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Metchosin
Date: 11 Dec 07 - 12:31 PM

Aw gee gnu, sorry to hear that you have to go under the knife because of your chipmunk impersonation, but that's what you get for stuffing your nuts in your cheek.

Old cow that I am, it was with some alarm that I noticed a couple of weeks ago, that a part of my anatomy was no longer relatively symetrical either and that my right tit had suddenly regained a more robust, youthful, perky appearance.

As it has been many years since I've been freshened, it was with considerable surprise and relief to discover I had mastitis and fortunately my right tit was soon deflated to match my left, with a round of antibiotics.

I promise to think of you, when they crush my boobs between two glass plates again next week.

In the mean time, take care buddy.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 11 Dec 07 - 05:50 AM

G... yes. Back in June, 2005, I entered post surgery on a Friday afternoon. My buddy and his son came to visit me Sat eve. Upon entering the ward, a nurse saw my buddy looking around and asked to help. They were told that no Gary Owens was in their care, after looking on their records. His son told her the room number (I had phoned and talk to the lad Sat afternoon) and she came to my room and asked me my name and then checked my ID bracelet. They found my chart Sun morning, after the doc requested it "stat"! He was nearly late for church.

Peace... that ain't all they do.

Mick... in that case, I'll bring my Hran with me and keep up practice.

Kat... if I can make just one person laugh...

Ernest... I will go back to Zweibrücken one day. Maybe we can meet at a Ghast House (spg? my German ain't what it used to be - of course, I was 3 yrs old).

Mary... nope. And, thanks.

Art... Wha?

Beer... ice fishing? Not me. I can't sit in a boat all day and drink, er, fish.

And, to all those who have PM'd and emailed, thanks. I will answer all of them in due time.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Beer
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 08:34 PM

So are you still on Pablum buddy? How do you answer that one. That's like if asked. "Is it true you still beat your wife?". That Pablum stuff will start working on the other end you know. As John Prine says in one of his songs. "Baby Poo, the worst kind". Does this mean you have to keep your mouth shut in case you catch a draft. No ice fishing for you. Sorry Bee, but I never take a drink in the morning. However maybe as I think back the bars would have been open in Newfoundland by their time. Yep, I guess we could have had one.
You take care Gnu, I'll be passing through again sometimes. Maybe by then your voice will be in great shape and will jam once more.
Adrien

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: artbrooks
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 07:15 PM

Gall stones in the bile ducts, eh? I don't EVEN wanna know how you managed that trick!

Watch out if you take up Rapper on his offer. The Pokateller airport is still a bit primitive.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: SINSULL
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 07:02 PM

GEEZ Gnu! That's a hell of a Christmas present. SO sorry. Anything we can do besides being sympathetic?
SINS

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 03:35 PM

If you gotta go you gotta go, I guess. But Little Max is really disappointed. I saw him at lunch, eating some stumps ("For roughage," he said) and he said to tell you that he'll do the job free for nothing and to let him know if the operation doesn't work. He'll hitchhike all the way to your place to break up that stone for you.

(Few people refuse Little Max a ride. Say he's standing there hitchin' and a pickup truck whips by at 80 mph. He just grabs it and hauls it to a stop and gets it. Sometimes he had to set his heels a bit.)

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Ernest
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 03:09 PM

Hotel De-vil?

Doesn`t sound to trustworthy to me....but at least you`ll be warm ;0)

For your next vacation I suggest a better place - we could even find a nice hotel in Zweibrücken for you!

Whatever, I wish you the best of luck !

Ernest

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: katlaughing
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 03:01 PM

Best wishes and thanks for the laughs. Great descriptions!

Come back a gnew gnudarlin'!

kat

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Big Mick
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 02:42 PM

Hey, buddy, I am a bit incommunicado these days, but know that you are in my prayers. Judging from the post, your attitude is positive, and that should help. Be well, so's we can make some music when we finally meet 3D.

All the best,

Mick

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Beer
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 02:37 PM

Peace.
Great saying by W.C. Fields. "Never drink water, fish make love in it". And what I have been told it was true, he never drank water but scotch was his favorite even while recording.

Gnu, I'll get back to you soon. Little busy right now.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 02:36 PM

Didn't know you was there when your friends came visiting as I remember gnu.
G

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 02:25 PM

They already know about me. I was there just a couple of weeks ago. They probably even remember June, 2005... or, have it posted on the bulletin board, just in case.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: GUEST,Peace
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 02:12 PM

You gonna be back home for Christmas? Also, has anyone warned the hospital staff about you?


Just wondering . . . .


Think positive, do well and recover quickly. What is it my friend says? Oh, yeah, "Drink plenty of water and walk slow."

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 02:08 PM

Bee... Beer did have Glenfiddich for you. Well, he would have if I hadn't drank it. As for chasing nurses, I gave that up long ago when I found out some weren't as chaste as G suggested.

Rap... that there lithothingy is recently experimantal according to the butcher that's gonna do the slice & dice. And, apparently, the only piece of equipment in town for that kinda thing is the property of the urologists and they are a bunch of pricks.

maeve... I almost wish Rap wasn't so funny because it hurts like heck when I laugh... like right now. I didn't have time to read all of the posts previously.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 11:13 AM

Dale here, on gnu's computer. Hey, Cletus! Merry Ho Ho and all that eh! We was gonna come visit you and yers after we went ta see Shane in Uppity Canada but after we got the truck outta the pound we went on a tear and landed up in uniform agin.

Them there Yella Stripes has got it in fer us. We wasn't doin nothin fer them to pull us over but the tags were axpired and when we got pulled over the Royally Mounted said he smelled beer. I told him it musta been from before it got pounded what froze up and then thawed when we lit the birch bark up ta defrost the windas. He couldna smelt no beer on us cause we was drinking vodka and OJ fer just that very reason. I wouldn't blow so he says I gotta go. Took my keys n all.

Course, soon as I was in the unit, the boys fired up the truck, what don't need no key, and proseeded ta follah us. Like I told ya, them Stripers ain't none too warm on us and so he stops an pulls over the boys and calls a tow. At least we got to stay in the same jail agin, fer a while that is, until after the fight.

Anyway, I come ta Moncton fer ta do some Kissmeass shoppin and find out that gnu at the doc's, gettin more tests on accounta bein on them there anit-Beotuck drugs for way too long. Why anyone would be agin Newfie Injuns, er, First Nations Peoples of Newfoundland, scuse my igorance, in the first place, I dunno. Anyway, he mighta got that there golightus from the drugs, on accounta he has loose bowels and spends a lot a time doin crossword puzzles, ya know what I mean? I think he's just full a ya know what eh. I think he spose ta git some liver er somethin at the same time. I guess his doc is a butcher, too.

Anyway, I needed some more cash fer ta git some stuff fer under the tree and found out gnu was at the doc's, so it worked out good. I don't hafta borrow no coin from gnu on accounta his freezer is full of stuff and as long as it stays cold as Aunt Sally, rest her soul, I kin just put the stuff I got under the tree and cover it with snow. I got lots a beer in fer the Hollerdays so I can pee all around the tree often enuff to keep the hungryest coyotes and such from gittin at it.

Well, I gotta git before gnu gits back… he don't know I got outta jail yet. Otherwise, he'da put a better lock on the back door.

Stop the puck first and worry about the pain later eh. I'll see ya when I see ya.

PS Say HI to Shane fer me eh. I keep callin but some lady just says the number has been disconeckted every time I call and I am runnin out of elecktrickal box blanks.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 10:06 AM

Goodness, Rapaire, you do like living dangerously!

Gnu, when you stop laughing, tell That Man he's Not Very Funny!

(Come on, I dare you...'bet you can't do it!)

maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Rapparee
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 09:08 AM

So, there's a rock blocking your spit glands. Buddy, have I got a deal for you!

You come out here and I'll take you up to the Legion Hovel. You can have all the beer and whisky (or whiskey) you want and when you swell up we'll have Little Max (6'8" and he does his own dental work by driving a 10-penny nail into his jaw and grinding it to a point when a tooth falls out) do one of those lithothingies that break up stones in the body on you. Little Max LIKES to do that kind of surgery. Guy who had kidney stones had it done and we haven't heard a peep out of him about them kidney stones for a couple of years. In fact, he hasn't said anything about anything, not even what the roots of the grass looks like from his new perspective.

And you only have to pay for the beer and stuff. Little Max don't charge a thing for doing the lithothingy cuz he thinks it's a public good deed.

Come on out, we even got an airport and at least half the runway is graveled over now!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 08:49 AM

Nurses are meant to be chaste.
g

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Liz the Squeak
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 08:45 AM

You've had your parrot removed? I wondered where the blue and yellow one on my mantlepiece came from....

Take care dear, no chasing nurses.

LTS

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Bee
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 08:15 AM

Owie, gnu! Hope all goes well. I never even knew those nasty little glands existed until one of 'em got inflamed a few years ago.

And... harrrummph!! Beer didn't bring me any Glenfiddich! You must be special!

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 06:59 AM

Just got a PM.... no, it is not a tumour like I had removed on the right side in June, 2005 (see here ).

I was feeling a bit tired on August 17 and it just so happened that Beer (Adrien) was on vacation (I guess he needed a rest, too) and dropped by for a visit. Well, he had some beer, naturally, a bottle of Glenfiddich and a guitar. I had some (hehehe, "some") beer, too. I got very relaxed and, before I knew it, I was stoned.

I went "Chipmunk" in about five minutes when the stone moved into the main duct... a lopsided chipmunk, but, a very relaxed chipmunk.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: Leadfingers
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 06:54 AM

Is there a similar 'Hotel de Ville' any knows of in West London ? That sounds the sort of Rest I could do with , have been busy doing remarkably little for more than five years now !
Keep us informed gnu !

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: GUEST,CLETUS HARDDINGER
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 06:53 AM

Hay thair gnu. Wutz gnu? Thet wuz purty funny huh? Yeah it was I gotta agree. I wuzza goofin roun with Catspaw's puuter and red yur posts.

Now lissin heer......I bin reedin whut all ya had ta say an Buddy it wuz weerd. I even went ta talk ta tha Reg boyz and Reg wuz sleepin one off but Reg an Reg wur both thinkin like I wuz. And I tell ya whut we wuzza thinkin iz thet sumbuddy izza fuckin with ya on thiz rezort bizness. Now we cud be messed up on thiz but me an 2 of tha Reg boys think thet playz iz reely a hospital. No shit Buddy. We reely do. I reckun thetz okay tho cuz Catspaw goez ta them playziz all tha time and thay seem ta treet him purty gud so I can see how ya mite be sorta cunfuzt.

But az fur me well I aint nun tu hot on em. Me an Paw an Buford went ta one when one of our portable outhouses got looz while we wuz kleenin it and rollt off downhill with Paw inside. It wuzza reel mess and wen we got ta tha hospital them folks callt sum deepartmint callt Central Sterile. Thet skairt the livin shitz outta us cuz nun uv us wuz wantin to be sterilized all up. I allwayz figgered on keepin my cock an ballz alla my life an dint have no intenshun uv leevin them in no hospital in Tennasee.

So yu needz ta be kairfull an keep an eye an maybe yur handz tu on yur dick an nutz. A;zo we dint unnerstan whut tha hell thet spittin shit wuzza bout but maybe Catspaw will figger it out fer us.

CLETUS

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 06:39 AM

Can't sneak anything past you g, can I?
G

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 06:32 AM

Nothing (better) to do, G?

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: John MacKenzie
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 06:08 AM

) Arid Opt
2 ) Arid Pot
3 ) Arid Top
4 ) Atop Rid
5 ) Dart Poi
6 ) Drip Oat
7 ) Drip Tao
8 ) Paid Rot
9 ) Paid Tor
10 ) Pair Dot
11 ) Port Aid
12 ) Raid Opt
13 ) Raid Pot
14 ) Raid Top
15 ) Riot Pad
16 ) Road Pit
17 ) Road Tip
18 ) Toad Rip
19 ) Tori Pad
20 ) Trio Pad
21 ) Trip Ado
22 ) Parotid

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 06:04 AM

No... I get spit on enough, but thanks for the kind thought.

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: maeve
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 05:55 AM

Too funny, gnu. I think I'll wait on that particular vacation. Keep well, and may your extended "vacation" restore you to good health. Will you need saliva donations from Mudcatters?

maeve

Subject: RE: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: bfdk
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 05:54 AM

Uhm... I think I'll book elsewhere..

Best of luck with it, gnu, enjoy your rest :-)

Bente

Subject: BS: gnu's vacation; Gimmie a break eh!
From: gnu
Date: 10 Dec 07 - 05:47 AM

I have been extremely busy at nothing. I did so little in the past few months that I needed a vacation. Of course, when you do nothing all the time, the only way to really "get away" is at the Hotel de Ville. It's what all the cool middleagers around here are doing these days.

I managed to get a room on the weekend two weeks ago on just a few hours notice! I have to admit I was kinda sneaky about it. I went to the backdoor at 5AM and staggered in. As soon as the travel agent saw how cool I was, she she took my plastic and gave me the best seat in the house. Then, the manager asked me a few questions and took me straight to a private cubicle where I was immediately attended to by very professional staff dressed in smart uniforms.

They gave me a lovely, flowing frock, helped me onto a comfy spa table with crisp linen that smelled just so… "clean", and began to pamper me. They had a slew of hi-tech equipment that they used to assess my exact needs and brought in experts to ensure that these needs were taken care of "stat" (that's the kind of cool slang they use; it's a polite word for RFN). As I was completely worn out from doing nothing, rather than having me sit up and stay awake to take some special pick-me-up elixers, which would take longer to work , they hooked me up to three (three!) different IV's and told me to just relax. Boy oh boy, did I relax!

Within hours, I was wheeled to a corner room on an upper floor of a wing of the villa with a splendid panoramic view which included the parking lots – vehicles were lined up on the street, waiting for a space. I thought, "Gosh. This place is doing a LOT of business. I can't believe my luck!"

I got into my electric powered multi-positional bed and again I was attended to by staff who brought me drinks and snacks and pills to soothe my aches and pains. I even had an "electronic bell" that I could press for room service in case I needed anything "stat". Before I settIed in and continued my peaceful rest, I phoned my mother to tell her about my incredible luck. She was indeed surprised and asked if I needed anything to make my vacation better. Of course not! I was almost in heaven as it was.

After I slept for what seemed like a whole day, I met a lot of other cool "mids". We got along well and shared our tales of how we managed to get into such a swanky place. We talked and talked; so much so that the staff gave us some pills that really relaxed us.

Unfortunately, the next day, the bad news came. I was rested just enough to go home. I knew I would miss my new friends, the pampering and the gourmet cuisine, but, they arranged for me to be able to get more soothing pills after I left and gave me strict orders about continuing my rest at home. They even arranged for me to be checked up on by one of their senior booking agents in just about a week and told me that if I felt really tired, come on back right away. It would be hard for me to do less than nothing, but, I was determined to try.

Now, you talk about luck! I went for the checkup and was told I needed more rest ASAP ("as stat as possible", I assume). The very next day, I was elated when a call came telling me that I was being booked for another stay. And, these guys are dead serious about it, not to mention thorough. I go back on Tuesday for pre-vacation registration and further needs assessments with even more hi-tech equipment. Then, on Friday, I go back for the the full treatment.

I don't want to get my hopes too high, but, I might be so peaceful that I won't even know where I am or what's going on until Sunday. They are so committed to getting me rested up that they said I would be their guest for "as long as it takes". And, even after I leave, I can't drive for two weeks from Friday, I can't engage in any physical labour for at least six weeks, including light housework, I will still be able to get more pills for as long as I need, and a bunch of other stuff that they will tell me when my vacation is over.

I have needed this rest since August 17, so I am looking forward to Friday with great anticipation. Of course, since I was doing so little for so long, I have a lot of things to do before then. But, that will just make my time off even more relaxing.

Gee, typing all this has tuckered me out. Time for a nap.

Before I go… I imagine some of you are wondering how you could get away. Well, you could try this
. Worked for me.