LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby...now on to Life!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: LilyFestre
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 08:05 PM

I did a lot this mornig while Jeremiah napped but then I lost my oomph. Met my Mom and Grandma for some iced tea and then hit the grocery store where I spent half an hour making photo prints for friends and family. Grocery shopping on top of that....Mama figured out how to use the car carrier in the shopping cart seat so baby doesn't have to touch the icky store cart. *all proud of myself* Jeremiah behaved himself very well. Mommy is tired and cranky...pulled something in my belly near my incision. ARG. Too much hoisting the baby in his car seat I'm afraid. No more for the next few days....ok, well...visiting some friends but really...it's all home time from now on for a bit. Chemo is whooping my butt energy wise...I NEED to slow down.

Dinner is done, chores for the day are done and my Relay site is up and running...YAY.

Night all.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: wysiwyg
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 04:01 PM

A tip is just a tip-- sometimes, to save for later.

You will find, though, that just about as soon as you get used a particular schedule-- his growth will change it. A large part of parenting is the mental gymnastics to keep up with the inevitable changes. We're usually just a tad behind their curve! :~) One of the lovely things about children, especially babies-- they really do wake up each day practically a new person.

My younger brother had a great paradigm for this with his infant son. He explained to me that Nick had recently arrived from a different planet than the rest of us, and that his job as Dad was to respect that Nick had his own way as well as to show him, "But this is how we Earth people do things, and you'll want to know our ways, too." He saw his role (partly) as being the ambassador between Nick and the new world he was growing into.

~Susan

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: LilyFestre
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 12:19 PM

Regarding Jeremiah.

He sleeps quite a bit and we are on somewhat of a schedule now...needs to be tweaked a little bit but really, I think he does very well.

In the evening he falls asleep around 9:00 or so and then wakes up anywhere between 11:00 and midnight for a diaper change and feeding. Then he is AWAKE. Bright eyes, cooing, smiling. He plays for maybe 30 minutes to an hour (despite mommy not playing...he's totally interested in his hands)and then drops off to sleep for the night. Up for a diaper change and feeding between 3:30 and 4:30....drops back to sleep until 5:00-5:30 at which point he is UP and wants active play. We play with him and then he goes back to sleep which really works out fine with us. That gives me time in the morning to do morning household chores, make breakfast, pack Pete's lunch and some quiet time with Pete (breakfast conversations are always the best time of day here). Jeremiah is back up at 9:00ish and we begin our day.
   
I'm sure he will sleep through the night soon enough. Right now, I'll settle for 5 hours of sleep at once. :)

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: wysiwyg
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 12:09 PM

Another hot tip to address babies who flip their schedules, mixing up night and day-- turn down (around 9PM), and then OFF (at 10), all the lights in the house. Keep any night-time babytending very, very dim, quiet, lowkey. Give attention, but not playtime. Their brains figger it out from there if we do not over-stimulate them with light, noise, and facial responsiveness. You act sleepy, they get the idea before too long.

~S~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: LilyFestre
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 11:36 AM

Here's a direct link to make a donation to the American Cancer Society for me!

Donate to The Relay For Life in Michelle's Name

WOOO HOOOOO!!!! YEEE HAAWWWWW!!!!

Thanks in advance!!!!!!!

Love to all,

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 11:12 AM

Michelle, a feeding tip: Kids form habits, so if Jeremiah expects to be fed at midnight and 4am, he'll wake at midnight and 4am. But if he gets a bottle of water at midnight or 4 am (you might want to take out one of those feedings at a time, not both), then he'll stop waking up wanting it after a few attempts because water just isn't as exciting to wake up for! Check with one of the nursing books (La Leche League has some good ones) to see what the number of feedings at any given age are recommended. He may be a little young yet to go all night without, but you might manage to do a feeding at bedtime, then one very early, and then the regular daytime feedings.

I'll go into the web site and see about making a donation.

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: LilyFestre
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 10:36 AM

Tinker,

   That's the page!!! YAY!!! I am Michelle Lawrence (there are a couple Michelle's!). THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!   I am working on my personal page for the team too via the ACS! Cool beans!

Susan,

    As far as I know, that's fine. Our team captain was going to ask about it at the last meeting just to be sure...don't know why it wouldn't be. If you are leaving it there for the duration and others would be permitted to use it, I'd like to request it for the Survivor's Lap (first thing) for my friend Tracy....she is currently undergoing all kinds of physcial and occupational therapy but a lap around the track would just be too much for her.

Cool beans! I love when things work out!

Love,

Michelle and Jeremiah (who is going to the Relay with a onsie that reads, "I wear teal for my mommy!"

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: wysiwyg
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 09:53 AM

LF, I am still planning to park my scooter at Relay for the duration, for my use, yours, and anyone who needs it.

~Susan

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: Tinker
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 09:45 AM

I think this will bring you to your team page

Angel Walkers


If this is right people can contribute to any individual by clicking on their name or make a whole team donation.

If you make a link to your personal page ( I absolutely spaced on which Michelle you might be...BG) ( IF you are yet a third Michelle click join team and go from there) People can contribute from your page toward your goal and we can all watch the numbers grow....

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 09:36 AM

Count me in- and PayPal is a great idea. I've been off the puter again but just chiming in to celebrate a new day, and the great news about Relay for Life!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: LilyFestre
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 08:16 AM

Tinker,

   I am walking in the Wellsboro, PA Relay For Life which is being held on July 9th & 10th. :) I am on the Angel Walker Team that is part of the Niles Valley United Methodist Church. :)

I'll have to check that out! I'm sure you can donate to the national site but no sure how that works with teams. Thanks for the heads info!

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: Tinker
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 08:13 AM

What town is your Relay for Life walk in? The main site should let us donate once you and you team are registered. I found Hanover and Windber in Pennsylvania on that date.....

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: LilyFestre
Date: 21 Jun 10 - 06:19 AM

Up early with a playful Jeremiah. *yawn*

About the Relay. I am going to take it easy, I promise. I am going to walk at the opening ceremony for the survivor lap and then for the first half hour of the event.....right around 10:00am. Then at 4:00am I am scheduled to walk another 30 minutes.....everything is at my own pace, of course. I am on a team so there are plenty of people to keep walking during the 24 hour event. Pete and I are taking a tent and I plan to be there for the full 24 hours. My mom will be there for part of the event too as will Jeremiah. I'm not planning on having him there for the full 24 hours....his nana will be more than happy to have him for the night. Also, if it's too hot, I will walk when I'm supposed to and go to Mom's house for the in-between times....guess I'll just have to play it by ear. I'm really excited about the relay though....I have a shirt just for this event and I'm going to wear my viking helmet draped with a teal boa for the survivor lap! Since it's a local event, I know lots of the people participating and that will make it fun too. There is an open invitation at our team camp site for people to just come hang out and visit for as long as they want. It's all about supporting one another and helping to raise money for local assistance and research. :)

I'm hoping today is the end of the bone pain and that maybe Jeremiah and Mommy can take a snooze a little later on. The little stinkpot thinks play time is around midnight and then again at 4:30am or so. He's all bright eyed and smiley...cooing away...can't possibly be upset with him but I AM tired!!!!   Happy and tired. :)

Thanks for your donations.....WOOOO HOOOOO!!!!!

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-Mommy+Daddy+Baby makes 3 Relay for Life
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Jun 10 - 10:24 PM

Michelle, try to get PayPal in there and you'll get even more folks donating, is my guess. I can donate either way.

Early July is pretty close, so PLEASE PROMISE us that you'll take every precaution to stay hydrated, rest when you need to, and sit out the end if you have to. Okay? No donations are going away if this event is too soon after you finished chemo to do the whole thing. We'd rather have you stay healthy than finish the race and make yourself feel bad again.

Okay. Soapbox off. :)

This is certainly going to be a year you won't quickly forget.

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: SINSULL
Date: 20 Jun 10 - 08:51 PM

Me too.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: Bobert
Date: 20 Jun 10 - 08:28 PM

Count me in fir $20... Hey, it's a start...

Relay is such a fine organization...

B~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 20 Jun 10 - 07:37 PM

Hello Friends,

    In just a few short weeks, the actual date being July 9th and 10th, I am going to be walking in the American Cancer Society Relay for Life. I am looking for donations or people to sponsor me for this amazing event! My goal is to raise $500.00 for my team, The Angel Walkers. I am not one to ask for donations and I hesitate to ask any of you here because you have ALL been so incredibly supportive of me in more ways than I can count.....BUT.....the money raised for The Relay For Life is something I have also benefited from (transportation reimbursement for my many trips downstate for treatment, wigs, counseling, support groups, help to find my way through the medical maze) and I know how it important it has been for me. The money is raised for the things I've mentioned but also for education and research for ALL cancers. I think that's an important point to make as we all know and love people who have had cancer that isn't breast or colon (although reasearch for those is very important too...just saying they aren't THE ONLY cancers out there). Would you please consider helping me to meet my goal?
    I am working on getting a site set up with the Relay For Life so donations can be made with a credit card for those who prefer to do things that way. In the meantime, if you would like to help, you can send me a check (PM me for my mailing address please) made out to The American Cancer Society. They will send you an acknowledgement and receipt for tax purposes. Every bit helps. EVERY SINGLE CENT.
    Thanks for giving it some thought! Commercial over. For now. *GRIN*

Love to you all,

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 20 Jun 10 - 01:17 PM

What a fabulous Fathers Day this must be for Pete! Have a great time, all of you, and take it easy since you're at that painful stage. Even if you do a rain check, today will still be very special.

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 19 Jun 10 - 11:52 PM

I'll second that!

sandra

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: maeve
Date: 19 Jun 10 - 08:00 PM

I am happy for you, Michelle.

maeve

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 19 Jun 10 - 07:52 PM

Ahhhhhhhhhh.   A day at home. Lots of playtime with my son. Assembling the pack and play (OMGosh....this thing is RIDICULOUS and wonderful all at once!) with Pete. Jeremiah loves his new play space!

My bones are hurting....what else is new? I've put off taking the pain meds as I wanted to enjoy the day with my family but now it's getting late and I really am needing them. Pete is making pizza from scratch, Jeremiah is dry, fed and snoozing away....so it's time.

I decided you guys are right....I'm not going to rush around with the baby nor am I going to sell any instruments right now...I don't care if it happens today or in a few months.

Being home with my family makes my heart happy beyond words.

I ordered a onsie for Jeremiah's first Relay for Life (coming up next month)....it has a blue teal ribbon and says, "I wear teal for my mommy."

:) Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: jacqui.c
Date: 19 Jun 10 - 12:57 PM

MMMMmmmmmm........

Baby smell - wonderful!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 18 Jun 10 - 11:29 PM

They say don't make any big decisions immediately following a big medical procedure. It sounds like a good musical exchange - because, of course, if the instrument you get is one you'll actually play, you'll be happy. But still, will that wait a week or two? Once you have it, but even before then, you have a new and appreciative (and captive. . . ) audience for your playing and singing. :)

When you're to the point where you are free of those aches and pains, have you seen those baby tummy packs? I loved them with my children. Admittedly, hot weather will make you both sweat, but if you can use it around the house or in malls, etc., those tummy packs mean you have perfect eye contact with that little one and he can hear your heart beat if he lays his head down on your chest to sleep while you walk. And you can lean over a little and kiss the top of his head and get that baby smell you'll know for the rest of your life.

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: Bobert
Date: 18 Jun 10 - 10:14 PM

Tie-dyed Jeremiah???

Great!!! Gotta start 'um off early...

B~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 18 Jun 10 - 10:06 PM

Whew. Long day. I did go to the craft fair however I only walked around half of it. It's not that big (only 1 square block) but it was HOT and crowded which meant lots of standing still in one spot....not good for me today as it makes my leg bones hurt even more than when I'm walking about. Soooo....I did half and am content with that. Jeremiah got to meet some new friends but overall I kept his stroller tops up...the sun was just too strong and he cries when it's in his eyes...who can blame him?
I have attended this particular craft fair for YEARS and every year they have a tie-dye stand full of t-shirts, skirts, and stuff. My husband LOVES that kind of thing and while he and I have our own tie dye stuff, Jeremiah does not...at least until now! I got him a little purple and teal tie-dyed onesie....*GRIN* I'll get some photos of him in it up sometime soon. He's just too cute.

Ok. So. I started pain meds this evening. Pete is home all weekend so he will help...of course he will! A local music shop is having a trade in weekend....thinking about getting rid of my guitar (never has fit me right...I need a more narrow fret board), electric violin (what was I thinking?) and mandolin (never play it) for a small Baby Taylor which I have fussed around with before and that fits me well. We'll see. I'm running low on energy and almost would just like to stay home for the next month or so.

:) Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: mouldy
Date: 18 Jun 10 - 08:55 AM

Wow! You are doing so well, Michelle. Just don't get carried away, although I think you are well-versed in the pattern of after-effects. Little J will still be there to show off when you aren't on the sleepy meds, so just go with what feels right on the day.

However, I suspect that the "Proud Mummy Mode" has properly kicked in now, and may override what you know are going to be temporary (if nasty) side effects of medication! I BET you get to your craft fair!

Andrea x

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: Tannywheeler
Date: 18 Jun 10 - 08:47 AM

In re: HAIR
In 1987-88 my mom went thru surgery, chemo, radiation--& baldness. Hair came in salt&pepper (more salt) & a standup ripple like Elsa Lanchester in "Bride of Frankenstein". As a baby/toddler she was "tow-headed"(almost white-blonde). About 6wks. before she died she was in her bathroom at home & I heard her cry out. Terrified, I ran in & she was leaning on the counter next to the sink shaking with laughter. Around the base of that almost-6-inch salt&pepper ripple were soft, golden curls!!! Life is still full of surprises. Lucky Jeremiah, a mom full of surprises & noticing all of them. What a good start. I send him a Granny-Tanny hug. I know it's an awful job, but please do it for me.
BTW, in the Faulk family, large & loving, the saying was, "That child's not gonna learn to walk until he/she's 5 or 6." Everyone wanting to hold & carry him/her around. Tw

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: Catherine Jayne
Date: 18 Jun 10 - 08:35 AM

Congratulations on counts Michelle! The photos are gorgeous. What a handsome and adorable little boy you have. I'm so glad that everything is working out for you.

Love Khatt xxx

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 18 Jun 10 - 07:56 AM

JimmyT!!!!!!!!!!!!!   

   Have FUN FUN FUN with those flies!!!!!!!!!!!

    Craft fair this morning and then taking it easy...too much running. Bones starting to ache. BLAH. However, there is a sleeping baby boy right in front of me.......can't be SO bad, right?

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the r
From: GUEST,jimmyt
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 10:02 PM

Michelle! I came on here tonight after a long absence to tell you I have gotten the flies out your husband tied for me and am excited to be going to Canada next week to use them! I had no idea you have been through such terrible times. Sounds like the cloud has a silver lining though and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers! I will send photos of the fish I catch on these beautiful flies! jimmyt

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: Rapparee
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 08:20 PM

Good for you! But take it easy. You've still got to get your strength back.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: Sorcha
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 06:47 PM

I am SO HAPPY FOR YOU!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 05:09 PM

LF-- sorry, glitch in schedules here results in probably no scooter this time. If this changes I will PM.

~S~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo done - mommy is on the run!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 03:15 PM

Give yourself the time and space you need. There will be plenty of time to show the baby to friends, as tempting as these post-chemo trips are. Don't overdo, now you have two of you to look out for.

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 02:28 PM

Always try church office fone first (lv msg). Church also is unlocked a lot during Laurel, in which case help yourself and leave it at the ER if church is locked when you are ready to return scooter. Pat D also has key, and I think Ed V does too (via his Columbarium purchase). I bet Sherry has one too.

If all else fails try Cn CS cell and we can usually zip over.

~S~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 02:10 PM

Spent this morning at a Look Good Feel Better program put on by the American Cancer Society. I went before I lost all my hair and had forgotten what to do when you don't have eyebrows or eyelashes so I went for a refresher.....took Jeremiah along with me and met some nice people and passed on helpful tips to a woman just beginning her chemo adventures. Felt good to be able to offer something useful!

We also stopped to at my yoga instructor's house so she could meet Jeremiah who slept the entire time!

We are back home now but will need to go out again as my Nana has come to visit (she's staying at my moms) and she is anxious to meet our son. :) Then Nana and I will take the baby to a concert my mom is singing in tonight.

So far, all is well on the side effect front. Thanks for the offer of the scooter Susan...if I should need it, I'll give you (or do I call the church) a call. who

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 09:20 AM

LF-- scooter? If you can figure out how to incorporate it with Jeremiah, and if you want to use it, you'll find it in the church from dinner time tonight till Sunday afternoon.

~Susan

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: SINSULL
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 08:07 AM

All good news. This feels like the end of a very satisfying novel. And they all lived happily ever after...
Get some rest.
SINS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: Bobert
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 07:11 AM

If not shocking pink, at least she has the wig...

B~

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 06:17 AM

how about shocking pink?

sandra

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 05:31 AM

Now THAT brought the tears to my eyes. But truly, dear Michelle- you've been running and flying every since this whole thing began!

INDEED!

New hair may be platinum blonde.... kewl easy to put in temporary funky colour dyes. Manic Panic!   While the hair is still short you could do stencil patterns, flowers and leaves, birds and butterflies, etc.

or words


I WILL SURVIVE with music notes.

New Mommy!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 17 Jun 10 - 01:28 AM

Spent the day getting new clothes for Jeremiah and introducing him to his namesake and other friends. I am beyond exhausted and have slept for most of the evening....Pete and Jeremiah were worn out too and have been sleeping also.

I am tickled to tell you that they have a children's consignment shop in the town where my husband works. I've been collecting clothes for a baby for some time now but there are many that won't work due to size for JT...so I took them in to the shop. I was able to get him a complete wardrobe for this season and with my trade in clothes, I spent less than $3.00!!!! EXCELLENT!!!!

On the chemo end, the aftermath has begun with the metal yick mouth. My bones are doing ok....even though I was on my feet ALL DAY! So far, no aches at all, just tired.

Susan,

   Funny you should use the analogy of the stuff they tell you on planes....take care of the mommy first, then the child as I was thinking about that just today too.
    I know I will need some help in the upcoming days and am going to have to ask someone to come over and help. I am aiming to keep the pain at bay until at least Friday afternoon. The Laurel Festival is coming up and I desparately want to attend the craft fair on Friday morning with Jeremiah in tow. Usually there are several old friends floating about that event to run into, chat with, etc....it's part of the fun and given this year, I am anxious to see old friends and catch up.
    Anyway, yes...I will need the pain meds that knock me into space and I am going to have to allow someone in the house to help keep an eye on our beautiful boy (even though he currently sleeps a great deal of time....normal for his age). I don't want to risk being asleep when he is up and I may not hear him.
    Good news for the day...my hair is growing and no more meds to slow that process down!! I wonder what color it's going to be...right now it looks to be extremely light blonde, possibly white!!

Going to bed. Love to you all. I'm one day closer to full flight!

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: gnu
Date: 16 Jun 10 - 01:10 PM

Run like the wind... sniff.

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 16 Jun 10 - 10:51 AM

LF, you may know that I ran a home daycare for a number of years (way pre-CS). My most fragile client was a tiny preemie who came to me on a home apnea monitor. Her nurse came to train me on infant CPR and customize it to preemies, and she taught me how to run the apnea monitor that would come with Jamie. My thought when I mutually interviewed with Jamie's mom was, if I can't choose what challenges I get with MY kid, who am I to turn down an "at risk" daycare kid? I will simply have to learn what to do!!! And then DO IT. That is the job kids require....

My scariest day with her was not the start, but the time much later when her doctor weaned her (and her parents and then me) off the monitor. The day was left to me, for my stopping the hook-ups for every nap.

The day I did it I laid her on my shoulder in one of her favorite drop-off-to-sleep positions and I just rocked her, skin to skin, while she napped for her usual hour and a half. During that time God and Jamie made my skin learn of Jamie's relaxed, reliable strength. I absorbed how safe she really was.

I looked back over all the giggles at hookup time and how she had hated the removal of the hookups when I peeled them back off after the nap. I thought how glad she would be-- never having to be "peeled" again. I felt how totally limp she was on my shoulder and how strong and steady her breathing and heartbeat were. I could see that she had been ready for a long time, and that I was the only slacker left in her circle of care.

Other kids present needed attention briefly during this nap, so I just got up, tended to them one-handed, and went back to the rocker. Jamie almost purred, she slept so soundly.

When her mama pickerd her up she said she had done much the same thing the first night they went un-hooked. She suggested I keep the monitor for a few weeks in case I got nervous. She was done with it. Soon I was too, and the nurse picked it up from my place.


What made this work was that I had a plan, and I had a backup adult steps away "on call" who could help a little-- or run the whole show if needed-- or just BE there if I got nervous.

My plan was that if another kid needed me "on the hop," I'd quickly lay Jamie down on a safe, prepped rug and wake her up as I lay her down on my way to whatever crisis had called me. (Apnea babies only ap when asleep.) All the kids in my home that day were in plain sight the whole time-- I was doing this in an apartment and we had an open-concept kitchen/playroom.



Another time with a precious, wee one was little Robbie S. I forget what the problem was (Carla could tell you) but tiny Robbie and young mama were both at SSMH. Robbie was on 24-hour sats monitoring. Mama really needed to sleep a few hours... so I came in and took Robbie for 4 hours, in a rocker next to her bed. The nurse came in and showed me how sats go up with skin contact and up even more with back-rubbing/patting.

So I held and patted and rubbed Robbie in a slow dance-rhythm. When the sats machine stopped beeping, and held 95's steady.... mama fell out HARD and slept as well as HE was sleeping. I told her as she argued, "I know.... he'd rather be with you... it's OK if you don't sleep.... just let me love him for a little while, OK?"

Her body fell her to sleep.... because it was where the wisdom was.

===

OK, that's the background behind this: TAKE YOUR PAIN MEDS. Have a second adult with you and make a GOOD PLAN.

Because like the flight attendant on an airplane will tell all the mommies about oxygen for mommie first-- ya gotta take care of YOU FIRST. JTL will count on you to do that, and need you to do it so you can take the best care of HIM.

Later in life that will be one area where you will wish (all parents eventually do) that you had taken better care of YOU.

If you look back you will see so many things I told you... perhaps several tads earlier than you were ready to hear them. :~) This is probably another one, momma. Yeah I know-- he's your kid not ours. :~) Try to trust a leetle bit.

===

When will Miss Vee be coming to meet Mr. JT?

~Susan

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: AllisonA(Animaterra)
Date: 16 Jun 10 - 08:36 AM


Only 2 more weeks of chemo aftermath and I'm going to run like the wind.


Now THAT brought the tears to my eyes. But truly, dear Michelle- you've been running and flying every since this whole thing began!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: Sandra in Sydney
Date: 16 Jun 10 - 04:09 AM

sending more hugs & love

sandra

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 16 Jun 10 - 12:54 AM

You summed it up very nicely, Michelle. I know you'd have gotten through fine if the earlier adoption had happened, but this one has happened, and you'll be fine with it also. It'll be easier this way, all things considered, certainly. Too bad for that child in foster care. I hope he/she gets lucky and finds long-term loving care.

I've even thought about looking into it - my kids are just so great, maybe the luck would hold out and I could have a good influence on another child as well? Some of them actually prefer single parent families, or parents with no children at home. Amazing how versatile the system is when there aren't enough foster families around.

Take care this next week or two, get through them one day at a time. If ever you feel despair wash over, simply put Jeremiah in his crib and give yourself time to work through the chemo talking to you. (Don't listen to the chemo - you'll be fine!)

SRS

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: LilyFestre
Date: 15 Jun 10 - 10:30 PM

SRS,

   Let me give you something to share.....

    In May of 2010, Pete and I had an adoption fall through. We had met both birth parents (separately), jumped through all the hoops, Mom gave birth and signed the papers. Dad refused to sign the papers but was on his way to jail for 6 years for selling cocaine to a police officer. That baby went directly from the hospital into foster care. The nursery here was ready, our family was ready and our hearts were broken. Six months later I would be diagnosed with uterine and ovarian cancer and the reasons for that adoption not working out became clear. There would have been no way that we could have taken care of a baby during all the surgeries and treatments in the manner which we would have liked. I'm sure we COULD have done it but it would have been difficult and not to our liking.
   Then a week ago Monday I was supposed to have my last chemo treatment. As you know, they sent me home due to a low platelet count. If I had had the treatment, I would have not come home early and we would have not gotten the call about Jeremiah. Initially, we thought we would be picking Jeremiah up late Tuesday night but drama ensued as it frequently does with adoption and it wouldn't be until Friday afternoon when we were told to come pick him up.
    I had my last chemo treatment today. Everything looks wonderful according to my oncologist. My CA-125 test even dropped 2 more points to 16.2. Anything under 35 is fantastic...so as you can see, it's in a very healthy range which makes my heart sing!
    Jeremiah came at THE PERFECT time. I am healthy and we will be able to take care of him the way we want to and the way he deserves. When asked about how I wanted to celebrate the end of my chemotherapy I really couldn't come up with anything other than I want to spend time at home with my family. I think God heard me and made our family complete, enabling me to REALLY be home with our family.....nothing could possibly make Pete or I happier. NOTHING.
   Looking back, it's like everything has fallen into place after months of being in both emotional and physical pain. The words elude me at the moment, but the timing of all of this is incredible.

Gives me goosebumps, really.

Only 2 more weeks of chemo aftermath and I'm going to run like the wind.

Michelle

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 15 Jun 10 - 08:11 PM

What Bobert said!

Subject: RE: LilyFestre-last chemo coming up & incredible news!
From: wysiwyg
Date: 15 Jun 10 - 08:11 PM

Mt fear and hesitation is about the concern of it returning and not being under the constant medical eye. Normal, yes.

But remember how clearly your body told you something was wrong. If needed, it will tell you again. Trust.

~Susan