The re-Imagined Village

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Secret Satan
Date: 01 Jan 14 - 04:20 PM

Free for the Festive Duration : The Twelve Days of Christmas 1979​/​80 - '...music from the chambered winter tombs of hauntological folktronica...'

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 01 Jan 14 - 07:09 AM

In good re-Imagined tradition, I watched some nice British horror films this Xmas.

Mathew Hopkins Witchfinder General was good for atmosphere, and for seeing Hopkin's tramping ground in Suffolk villages like Lavenham. Lots of moody grass and woodland. The end was a bit crap. And the dumb blonde who decided to *stay in Lavenham* after the Witch burning episode was ridiculously infuriating.

I also watched Sean Bean's "Black Death" which wasn't a bad modern stab at recreating that classic British archaic horror / landscape vibe. Though it went a bit pants at the end as most horrors do and it borrowed too much from the Wicker Man. I'd have liked more 'real' paganism, or rather *absence of Christianity*, in so far as remote villages were typically ridiculed as 'pagan' not due to any conscious rejection of Christianity but merely ignorance concerning what all that latin and going to Church business was all about.

BBC's Tractate Middoth was entertaining but a bit lacking. The Ghoul was creepy but there could have been more 'mood'.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 01 Jan 14 - 06:25 AM

'Real fireworks' are most entertaining! Especially when choreographed along with some rousing Classical music such as the Round Table do. In fact I heard rumours that Bubba may have supplied the ones for this energetic display: Watch from 1:50 Just as a point of interest, does Bubba know that the colonies are no longer at war with the English? It can make going into the Gas station a little anxiety provoking at times..

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 01 Jan 14 - 05:22 AM

Vovo de la Gator here.

Bubba sells fireworks down to the gas station. He/she (we still ain't sure which) has the legal ones out front. If y'all want them real fireworks the password is "The Rapture." There's a virtul powder magazine of 'em behind the retread tire store.   I know, I thought it was a bit blasphemous, but kids today. They got no respect.

Anyway the pyro playthings will all be on BOGOF sale come Thursday morning after New Year's. I expect there'll be a run. Make sure you ask for the proper Chinee ones. Half of them West Indian ones are real duds, though they make a nice smell and purty color smoke.

I git real hungry after they set off a few of those.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST
Date: 31 Dec 13 - 04:52 PM

More scarecrows XTC - Scarecrow People

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 31 Dec 13 - 04:31 PM

Nice Scarecrow Dance Jack!

I've been listening to Bright Pheobus recently, and though this hardly needs posting, I will as it's so beautiful - just wish it were more suitable for accapella.
If you click on this post Tam, do have a listen:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ut9MhLq-tVs

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 31 Dec 13 - 04:23 PM

Despite the generous assistance provided by Bubba and Mme Alligator Sadly the Pinchlings was poorly attended this year, an impromptu committee meeting was held and the village council has determined that the improvident use by young people of 'internet networking' sites such as Facebark and Twooter are to blame.

In light of this information, Bubba has kindly offered to blow up the local telegraph poles - which apparently transmit this undesirable intrusion into local village life - next year in advance of the annual tradition.

For the most part the council have roundly supported this move. Though Mr Peewit of number 23 Orchid Drive, was rather concerned about the effect it would have on his 'personal' entertainments, he was assured that regularly scheduled dogging activities could if needed, be observed down at Bluebell Wood some twenty minutes from his home.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: VirginiaTam
Date: 28 Dec 13 - 04:32 AM

Vo vo de la gator ehre

Ahh.. me, but Drexel twas away a long time. He came home shortly afore Toussaint dragging in a large half-dead toad. I promptly popped it in the Royal Crown Cola ice box my nephew (name withheld) brung me from Bubba's gas station at junction of highways 610 and 10, near Gentilly.

That piece of equipment has been a real boon as I kin run it off the stolen lectric my nephew (name withheld) hooked up to my neighbour's pole or off the generator that runs on white lightnin'.

I store all sorts of goodies in that thar box. Got a possum, 7 river rats, and a couple of small gator tails in beside my Ben and Jerry's Caramel Sutra carton full of night crawlers.

I won't be bringing my nephew (name withheld) to the Pinchlings cuz he is a reall good lookin boy. Got's most of his teeth and the carbuncle on his neck has gone down to the size of a golf ball now. But he is too useful to me so he is stayin to home. So Bubba has offered to do body removal and my nephew (name withheld) will work at the gas station. Bubba has some black overalls if that's ok. But one shoulder strap was torn off by a rabid skunk last week.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Jack Blandiver
Date: 27 Dec 13 - 04:58 AM

Yay! The re-Imagined Village Revisited!

Actually, that might explain this which was giving me ear-worm all yesterday, so much so that I tried playing it on the fiddle when got home:

Boxing Day Scarecrow Dance

Musicologists are cautious over its provenance, some saying that whilst it's undoubtedly part of the Morris Trad-geist, there are elements of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz in there too, hence the scarecrow, presumably. There was a chorus collected too, it goes:

Have you seen the scarecrow?
Tatters & rags such a funny old show,
A lolloping, loping scarescrow
He sings 'Come along with me!'
He's coming down the road tonight
His tatters & rags all covered in shite
His ugly old face will give you a fright
He sings 'Give me some cake and tea!'

Pick the primal pagan bones out of that, Miss Kilnigur!

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 26 Dec 13 - 01:57 PM

According to the rough copy of as yet unpublished January edition of the village magazine, an exceedingly annoyed elderly member of the re-Imagined village has complained to the BBC that their recent televised ghost story "The Tractate Middoth", is nothing more than a plagiaristic rip-off of an unfortunate family experience regarding an annoying old uncle who (quote) "insisted on not dying properly!"

The resident is said to be most perterbed at having " bothersom ghosts" stirred up by the Beeb, especially as he's had to invoke the assistance of the local priest in order to restrain the unwelcome ghoul!

On a brighter note, the annual initiatory Pinchlings featuring the healthy young men of the parish tied and bound, versus the Man in Black's toad poison darts, will commence at midnight! Be sure to bring your own toad! And body removal services.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Miss Kilningur
Date: 27 Nov 12 - 04:48 AM

It seems some of the village youth are taking Mr Blandiver's comments about electronic music to their hearts, though not in the stately, civilised sense of Master Tinkersmeadow with his Ondes Martenot, but rather something more obnoxiously feral.

I found this poster on the village hall noticeboard this morning, and was not in the least bit amused: Exhibit A

This has been removed and placed in a locked drawer in my office until the culprit/s come forward. Apart from anything else, space is very limited on the notice board so permission must be sought.

Miss Kilningur

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 26 Nov 12 - 06:02 AM

In all honesty, I can't see who in their right minds would prefer an English Concertina over an Ondes Marteno, especially for the accompaniment of Scotch Ballads. Indeed, I'd go one further and say the ideal instrument in this respect would a THEREMIN.

Patented in 1928 (the same year the Ondes Marteno was invented) the theremin would become one of the instruments of choice for legendary Northumbrian dance band-leader, trumpeter, percussionist, & early electonic music pioneer Fred Fauntleroy (obit. 1951). Indeed, Fred abandoned his celebrated musical saw on being gifted a theremin by then Lady Coldharbour, Letitia Wetherstone, at some point in the mid 1930s and used it thereafter at the Hallowe'en Balls at Coldharbour Castle where it could be heard to great effect on his renderings of such gruesome epics as Tam Lin, King Henry and The Witch Mother.

Whilst Fred never played the Ondes Marteno himself, he acquired one for his piano player (Guy Zance) and the two would provide eery electronic duets (to the accompanyment of several droning Northumbrian Smallpipes, various jungle drums & gamelan instruments) in the resonant pillar hall of Coldharbour whilst their aristocratic guests would process from their rooms in togas, smoke excessive amounts of marijuana and proceed to freak out in an orgy of dimly-lit pagan depravity in a scene more typical of 1960s San Francisco than 1930s Northumberland, though, in actuality, inspired by the debauched antics of Emperor Gaius Julius Caesar Augustus Germanicus, AKA Caligula, who was greatly revered by Aristocratic Northumbrian Mystics, Occultists, Gnostics, Devil Worshippers and Mithraic Pagans at the time.

Of course, both the Theremin and Ondes Marteno were unknown to Caligula, but had they been one can be assured he would have prefered their demonic & less-than homely timbres over the tediously insipid folksy honking of the English Concertina any day and seized upon both with great gusto. Just check this out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OdL-vbOwvL0

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 25 Nov 12 - 06:55 AM

...Stop Press: the Tinkersmeadow's have put to pasture their over-the-border gig in the Village in favour of a strictly pipe and voice performance at their local SNP gathering; they will be replaced at EPFSTDS recital by the strictly unaccompanied singing of Fred Bare, followed by English country dancing to the homely timbres of English-concertinas and -flutes, AND tea.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Miss Kilningur
Date: 25 Nov 12 - 04:53 AM

Just to remind you that there will be a recital this afternoon in the village hall by Mr Cedric Blunt, the president of the English Parlour Folk Song and Tea Dance Society, who will be treating us to a genteel selection of edifying English Tradition songs collected from assorted sruffs, miscreants and ragmuffins and by means of sophistiticated arrangements on the pianoforte suitably scrubbed up to reveal their hidden depths and qualities.

Our regular members will be assured to know that whilst Mr Blunt collected his songs from the low life scum of the outlying estates and more impoverished regions of our village & its environs (including many tinkers, travellers, gypsy's, vagrants, and migrant farm workers) none of these people will actually be in attendance at the recital as we feel it would be detrimental to both their purity and dignity to be exposed to more genteel society.

There will be tea, cakes, buns, toffee and smelling salts available throughout the afternoon, especially as several of Mr Blunt's songs are described as being exciting portrayals of Authentic Country Life (such as The Fox Jumped Over the Parson's Peascod Patch and The Bonny Black Innocent Hare) whilst others are said to be betray their 'rather risque' origins. Songs such as Eh, Our Lucy's a One (in which a mother interrogates her naughty son over the whereabouts of his little sister's teddy bear) are described by Mr Blunt as being in all probability, deeply metaphorical in nature, likewise The Seeds of Lovely Nancy, whereas as others, such as How the Clever Parson Outwits the Stupid Fisherman and Pleasures His Fat Ugly Wife With a Cunning Cromer Crabfish Lubricated with Butter and Cheese and All, he confesses to being quite unnecessarily over-explicit.

As usual, there will be Country Dancing afterwards to the accompaniment of the Misses Tabatha and Melissa Tinkersmeadow on their delightful fiddles and after all that gay excitement, the afternoon will be rounded off by a recital of Scotch Ballads sung by the exquisite Miss Clarissa Tinkersmeadow accompanied by the ever popular Master Tom Tinkersmeadow on his Ondes Martenot.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 23 Nov 12 - 07:17 PM

All the good strong chorus clubs go for harmonies. At the Durham Club back in the day we revelled in pushing the envelope as far as we could. And some of uis still do! Most folk clubs we go to now do likewise - in fact in night 40 years o' folkin' I've never heard unison chorus singing, especially on Tyneside...

I suspect the Copper Family weren't unique; their influence went on the inspire other acapella harmony groups from the Young Tradition to the Watersons to the Wilsons to the various groups singing today in fine old style, be they Fisherman's Friends style chantey groups or the Young Uns. Then you've got that whole shape note thing Phil & Cath are involved with, which has echoes of the sort of thing you might hear around the pubs of Sheffield in the coming weeks. The Yorkshire Carolling tradition is an old one - and it extends beyond Yorkshire too - I knew old Durham miners who would play their harmonies from farm to farm on one string fiddles made from cigar boxes.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 23 Nov 12 - 05:54 PM

True - sometimes the Coppers sing in two-part harmony.

I just watched the Choir of the Year comp. on the Beeb, where some sang in four parts.

I still say nearly all the time in folk-clubs folks simply double the melody/one-part harmony/no chords come the chorus.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 22 Nov 12 - 06:54 PM

Chorus singing is all about the harmonies. This is a very natural & traditional thing to do with English Folk Song. Go listen to some Copper Family:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vQ9-uWXU4oU&feature=related

Is that not stirring to the yearnings of thy soul? It's not so easy for one person to do on their own though...

*

Xmas Lights, eh? I think Xmas Eve to Epiphany is sufficient, proper & correct, though we've still got stars, lights, sparkly stags & angels hanging off the rubber plant that have been there almost a year now - and a sparkly skeleton that's hung there since hallowe'en 2010 at least...

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 22 Nov 12 - 04:49 PM

When and who to switch the Village Christmas-LEDs on..?

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 22 Nov 12 - 03:47 PM

P.S: my poem on "The 35th Morpeth Northumbrian Gathering" - http://www.myspace.com/walkaboutsverse/blog/459741254

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 22 Nov 12 - 03:41 PM

"I don't understand any of the other stuff like there being no chords in English music.To me if someone sings a harmony, its a chord, isn't it?" (Big Al)...folks have tried to enlighten me on this before, but my experience is that when the chorus comes around, at a folk club, etc., others simply double the melody, which is not creating chords.

One exception I recall was, when singing "The Drunken Sailor" at a Morpeth Gathering, Benny Graham's choir added some more-sophisticated bits, which probably did involve the creation of chords - similar to classical choirs.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: Stringsinger
Date: 22 Nov 12 - 10:53 AM

The most notorious village was in the USSR, Potemkin, created to put on a good face of Russian life under Stalin. Today, it is referred to as a coverup village made to look good to visitors.

Disneyland, maybe?

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 21 Nov 12 - 01:08 PM

I'm not surprised your husband is well received, all the African people I've met have been super friendly and talkative. Always ready to to laugh and to smile. I hear a lot of really dark stuff about aspects of African culture (violence against women being a prime example) yet it's hard to comprehend when you meet African men, as they can be exceedingly 'correct' about behaviour.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 21 Nov 12 - 12:52 PM

I have to say, CS that we've met not the slightest racism or avoidance here. On the contrary, folk have been super and welcoming to him. They seem to realy love him, and when he goes down to the papershop it's like a Royal Progress. He comes home much later, having chatted with about ten people en route.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 21 Nov 12 - 12:46 PM

I must confess Eliza that the first time I saw a non-white person in my old village, I actually did a double take. Yup, a proper, "Huh! Wha' tha'?" I was pretty embarrassed and wound my neck in sharpish. That was two or three years ago now and the long time exclusively white demographic has shifted very slightly but significantly since then. There is now a young Indian family (or so I presume from their dress) and a proper flash looking Black geezer in a shiny BMW with a 'The Only Way is Essex' orange skinned Mrs with a little toddler - possibly the first mixed race child the village has seen in it's entire history!

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 21 Nov 12 - 12:24 PM

LOL CS, isn't it funny that every community has roughly the same types and situations? Sword attacks are rare though. Ten out of ten for that one. We were told of a couple of Chinese chaps who rented a house here (not ours) a few years ago. The stink of cannabis was overpowering, and the Police arrived. The Chinese wriggled out of a window and were away over the fields, never to be seen again. It was of course one of those cannabis farms with artificial lights and silver paper. The village wasn't cross at all, they were absolutely delighted with the shock and excitement. The fact they were Chinese made it all the more thrilling and exotic. I bet they're rather disappointed in my hubbie, he's terribly respectable, quiet and kind. Boring!

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 20 Nov 12 - 05:13 PM

Ha, Eliza - I recognise that picture! I live in social housing and consequent of much experience with The Asbo's count myself pretty lucky these days to live next door to a gossipy old lady. Getting gossip out of me is like getting blood out of a stone, but yet she tries!

Mind you my own family have courted their fare share of Asbo Shameless plots too, I must say and no doubt my gossipy old lady would to hear some of the juicy tale I could tell!

So to village gossip: one I heard about the prior residents of our current house was that the bloke was done for attacking his Mrs with a sword, bit more dramatic than any of the tales I could tell involving sherry stealing down the local shop, police raids, getting lost in hedges and home grown pot plants..

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Eliza
Date: 20 Nov 12 - 05:00 PM

I live in a small quite isolated village. Every village has its sterotypes. We have the scruffy family whose son is always causing upsets at school. He asked a dear little girl to suck something (it wasn't a sweeet) and was expelled forthwith. We all call them The Asbos. There's always an indomitable old man. Ours is ninety five and strides about like a youngster. There's the family whose garden is called The Yard and has a tractor, a trailer, a caravan, a pile of wood, a heap of broken concrete etc. Every village has at least one of those. There's the Sweet Old Lady, a widow, whose house and garden are immaculate. She wears a 'pinny' and puts her hair up in a bun. (Ours looks just like Betty on the Wonga ads. She even sounds just like her!) There's always a middle-aged lady whose huge dog does an enormous pile of poo in the same spot on the pavement each morning. And then there's my husband, the very black African with woolly hair. Hardly any villages have one of those!

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 20 Nov 12 - 04:51 AM

Having lived in a number of villages I have to say I hate village life. And there's the key I suppose - for village life to work I reckon you have to be born to it, and everyone else as well. Having been born on a housing estate & lived in cities, where the only people I had anything to do with were immediate neighbours, friends and family, I have to say I do enjoy the anonymity of greater humanity who don't even know I exist let alone chose to concern myself with my business.

The Idyll remains as a yearning for simpler times, like folk music in a way. That said I would dearly love to live in an old house in the country entirely remote from other people. We do that when we go on holiday - where we can gaze at the skies & make as much noise as we like. But we're too used to local amenities, things like shops, supermarkets, regular buses, trams, trains, libraries, doctors, dentists, Subways, chemists, cinemas, Wetherspoons, Harvesters, hospitals, decent TV reception, wi-fi, land lines, gas and neighbours who would be there in a crisis, but leave you alone the rest of the time...   

That said, even though I lived on a housing estate for the first 17 years of my life, I think I'd rather live in a village. The worst village is preferable to that. For me it's either town / city life - or else totally remote in the middle of nowhere - and out with my gun in the morning!

*

No chords in English music? The pastoral English tradition is best examplified in rock 'n' roll's essentially modal nature, which really beefs up with chords & harmonies. Word is these guys are booked in The Village Hall for a Christmas residency:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3WfoccRna6I

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Big Al Whittle
Date: 19 Nov 12 - 07:04 AM

I think its very nice that WAV thinks nice suff about England. I don't understand any of the other stuff like there being no chords in English music.To me if someone sings a harmony, its a chord, isn't it?

I've lived in villages most of my life - rural villages, mining villages, dormitory villages. there is a poetry there, but its as rich and complex as human life itself - not really a rural idyll.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST
Date: 19 Nov 12 - 05:12 AM

Did your village ever have a Fine Fare??

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 18 Nov 12 - 06:45 PM

Day after? I agree. Do they still have the Greggs Seconds Shop on Westgate Hill I wonder? All the day-old stuff ended up there at half-price. Great queues first thing in twe morning as I recall. I think it featured in Pravda under a headline bemoaning an impoverished north-east proletariat having queue for day-old bread... and cakes, pasties and pies.

Which reminds of the old joke (how your Tyneside dialect studies coming along?):

Geordie goes into Greggs, five minutes before closing. 'Whit can aa hev, pet?' he says, looking around the near-empty shelves.

'Whey - ye can hev a mince pie - or a meringue.'

'Nah,' says Geordie. 'Aa think yer reet. Aa'll hev the mince pie.'

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 18 Nov 12 - 06:27 AM

Not yet - I have put sultanas in a sliced-bread sandwich, and, as said somewhere?! above, I have stuffed a stottie with chips. As with baguettes, stotties the day-after are best after a grilling, I think.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 17 Nov 12 - 07:32 PM

Have you ever tried that, WAV? I'd be very impressed if you have.

When I went to college on the Coast Road in 1977 my old mum used to do me a packed lunch with Greggs stotties filled with honey & Edam cheese. That's something I could happily try again actually... The other stotty use in my childhood was cut up as toast 'fingers' for boiled eggs, or simply toasted with lots of butter. Or with bacon. Or used as a 'pizza' base.

I still find it odd that whilst Greggs is now a national chain, they only do sotties in the North East. They're best fresh & warm from the shop in the Grainger Market...

Dear God - what I wouldn't give for one now!

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 17 Nov 12 - 08:21 AM

...but that may send the Village bankrupt, if that chain of Australian-themed pubs sue...

t...so mince pies still tend to have suet in them, but there's certainly less meat than in the old days; and we could use vegetable shortening...

...or just stuff stotties with sultanas, vegan-margarine and jam?

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 17 Nov 12 - 06:38 AM

'Local' is the acceptable face of capitalist monopoly; notice, like TESCO & ASDA, that the 'Local' Wetherspoons will always feature the history & lore of its locality. In Tewkesbury there's The Royal Hop Pole (one of my favourites)- all bending dark ancient timbers - and in Morecambe, of course, there's The Eric Bartholomew.

I wonder, what is the The Village Wetherspoons called??

I propose... The Walkabout.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 08:19 PM

Or how about mince pies cut from children's thighs? Wetherspoons certainly seems to attract it's fair share of the noisy little vermin, I'm sure a few could be quietly culled without anyone noticing, or it upsetting the balance of things overmuch.

As an aside, it suddenly strikes me that The Village represents a kind of repository for All Things Made and Unmade, All Things of Goo's Creation, Below Above, Beneath or in the Crevices, just so long as The Word 'local' is applied as a prefix, it makes it SO.

Past my bedtime...

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 07:36 PM

The Xmas Goose will be fed on a strictly vegetarian diet, WAV - we'll make sure of that...

Vegan Mince Pies? Awkward: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mincemeat

Word is the festive menu at the local Wetherspoons this year is based on an old English version of The Boars Head Carol.

The Boar's head First
Porkington Mss #10, ab. 1460-70)

Hey, hey, hey, hey, the boar's head is armed gay!
The boar's head in hand I bring
With garland gay and (porttoryng)
I pray you all with me to sing

With hay...

Lords, knights and squires,
Persons, priests and vicars
The boar's head is the first mess

With hay..

The boar's head, as I you say
He takes his leave and goes his way
Soon after the 14th (theylffyt) day

With hay...

Then comes in the second course with (mekyll) pride
The cranes and the herons the bittern by the side,
The partridges and the plovers, the woodcock and the snipe,

With hay...

Larks in hot stew, ladies for to pick,
Good drink thereto, (lyeyvs) and fine,
Blwet of allmayn, romney and wine

With hay...

Good bread, all in wine, dare I well say,
The boar's head with mustard armed so gay,
Furmenty to pottage , with venison fine,
And the humbles of the cow, and all that ever comes in,
Capons I bake with the pieces of the roe,
Raisins of corrans, with other spices more....

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 05:59 PM

Over the centuries, mince pies have just about gone vegan, yes?

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 05:01 PM

I did a chestnut and cashew roast as a part of our winter solstice meal last year - not quite vegan as there was an egg in it. Bit dry though, I shouldn't have bothered roasting the chestnuts myself, but just used ones tinned in brine.

The year prior I did chestnut pate en croute (not sure if the pastry was fully vegan mind you, as I bought it in) but that was too gooey - down with gooey! Down with too dry too. There must be a happy medium somewhere? Goose is the same, too greasy if you don't pierce and drain the fat off properly, too dry if you pierce and drain it too much.

I'm sure there's a fairy story that addresses this kind of dilema somewhere?

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 04:44 PM

...se for the Village Christmas Dinner? And the vegan alternative, this year..?

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 10:58 AM

We believe in one Goo, the Father, the Almighty,
maker of heaven and earth,
of all that is, seen and unseen.
We believe in one Lord, Jesus Christ,
the only Son of Goo, eternally begotten of the Father,
Goo from Goo, Light from Light, true Goo from true Goo, .

Yeah, it has a nice ring to it!

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 10:23 AM

News of the proposed outdoor Mass for the Sacred Unconceived Souls of Dead Sperm, has enraged members of 'Down with Goo'* ; the local radical atheist Darwinist cult, who - inspired by antics of the now world famous Russian art collective 'Pussy Riot' - are said to be planning a sacrilegious 'happening' intended to disrupt the Mass, if it goes ahead.







* An unfortunate typographical error resulted in a whole batch of pamphlets and t shirts printed by the fledgling radical Darwinist cult reading 'Goo' instead of 'God' - due to insufficient funds the cult decided that instead of the costly process of reprinting, they would instead adopt the new name - reasoning that the word Goo was as good as God, when referring to a non-something which didn't actually exist anyway.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 08:37 AM

You see? There's WAV proving his Traditional Credibility by still using Myspace. Respect!

Meanwhile in The Village...

Encouraged by a new wave of fundamentalist feeling in the Roman Catholic community, Father O'Flanaghan has announced that last week's amnesty on contraceptive devices was such a success it will be repeated this Sunday too. Once again The Special Box is to be situated in the narthex of The Sacred Heart, though Fr O'F is keen to point out that he doesn't want condoms if they've already been used.

For the especially contrite, an outdoor Mass for the Sacred Unconceived Souls of Dead Sperm will be held in the Presbytery Garden at dusk on the 5th of December. Before this, a clean-up operation in all the 'usual places' has been organised by The Catholic Mothers' League. As the sun goes down, the discarded sheaths will be ceremonially, and individually, layed by the women themselves into the flames of a 'Holy Fire' kindled from olive-wood from the Holy Land. Father O'Flanaghan is reported to be 'very excited' about this, though whether it gets the go-ahead from Health & Safety is another matter entirely.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: WalkaboutsVerse
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 07:39 AM

...one size 7 and one size 9 for me (not that I ever bother buying 2 pairs of shoes), having been born that way near Didsbury Village - http://www.myspace.com/walkaboutsverse/blog/472829321

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,CS
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 06:40 AM

More on the incredibly rare to find The Magic Toyshop on IMDB:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0097806/

And the equally rare find They Came from Somewhere Else:

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0373632/reviews

No clickies this time

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: theleveller
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 06:17 AM

Yes, I've got a weird foot - ever since Billy Snot ran over one with his bloody traction engine. It's so embarrassing having to go into shoe shops and ask for one size 9 and one size 27.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 05:44 AM

Two HTML click-links in a GUEST post??? I tell you, there are weird things afoot in The Village this morning.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,A Mysterious Stranger
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 05:26 AM

Sorry, me above - post wouldn't take with the 'from' box filled out...

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 05:16 AM

A mystery resident of the re-Imagined village has recently stumbled onto a rare and long forgotten C4 series called 'They Came from Somewhere Else'. Certain strange similarities between the fictional Middleford and the very real re-Imagined village are so thought-provoking that she anonymously shares the series via the village web-site. The series quickly goes viral and soon everyone in the re-Imagined village begins to feel that something very queer indeed is going on..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pxgGpL9zU3A

The same resident has also recently found a long out of print film adaptation of Angela Carter's 'The Magic Toyshop' and for no particular reason also shares this with her fellow residents.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-Z-PiBtfMw

Unfortunately, after the collective distress generated by 'They Came from Somewhere Else' everyone in the village is consoling themselves with hot cups of tea, buttered crumpets and back to back re-runs of Heartbeat starring that nice Nick Berry.

Subject: RE: The re-Imagined Village
From: GUEST,Blandiver
Date: 16 Nov 12 - 03:50 AM

Through the mists of a freezing November morning, The re-Imagined Village materialises like Brigadoon. Make haste before it vanishes again...