Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: clueless don Date: 11 Jun 10 - 09:33 AM GUEST,Feezite, about the parody you posted on 15 May 10 - 09:09 PM, the one that starts "Boom the cherry bombs explode, Blowing potholes in the road". You say "To the tune of 'Deck the Halls'", but it scans like it was actually to the tune of "Hark, the Herald Angels Sing." Don |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,wright1 Date: 26 Jun 10 - 02:44 AM Here's what I remember of "When You're A Red". Hoping there's someone else who can fill in more... When you're a Red, you're a Red all the way! From your first Party coup to your last power play! When you're a Red, you've got agents galore! You give prizes for peace, while they stir up a war! You set off a test, and when you're halfway through it, you point at the West, and say, they drove you to it! That's how you do it! When you're a Red, you will sign a peace pact, that will fool everyone, 'till your troops have attacked! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,sciencechicky Date: 11 Aug 10 - 08:53 PM another ad one... to tune of "On Wisconsin" Push rice crispies, push rice crispies, snap, crackle and pop! And while you're at it, Push our corn flakes, finest of the crop. Yum yum yum. Say that each is Great with peaches, fresh or from the can. And while you're pushing, Don't forget All-Bran. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,sdw Date: 20 Aug 10 - 12:54 PM Does anyone remember this one (sung to the tune of "Bali Hai")? I can only remember the first 8 lines. Alcatraz is waiting On that rock in the bay Once you're there, there's no escaping You will stay, you will stay. Alcatraz is calling Hear it call through the gloom "You don't need a reservation, We've got room, we've got room" |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,showtunefolkie Date: 03 Oct 10 - 09:25 AM I'm trying to find the words to: "I have often walked my Pierre outside..." and ends with "...now he sits upon his own private john that I built for the dog that I love". This was an ode to a poodle owner. Where can I find these? In the meantime, my own 'tween memory recalls: "The thing that I bury will have to be A real Transylvanian monstrosity The thing for which I crave Will have two blood-shot eyes staring up from that grave..." and "There's no monsters like Pro Monsters There's no monsters we know..." Manny Get Your Ghoul and Frank Jacobs made me fall in love with parodies and sending up musical comedies. Thanks, man! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,LHC Date: 01 Nov 10 - 02:18 PM I remember that one, except for a few words I've left as blanks: "I have often walked my Pierre outside, But I never liked him in the dirty air outside. Now he sits upon His own private john, That I built for the dog that I love. See the ____________that I made for him! See the powder blue pajamas I crocheted for him! And should he feel ill, Here's the Contac pill That I'll give to the dog that I love. But oh! he sometimes annoys me, When he does, I'm firm as can be, Although it nearly destroys me To have to tell him he can't watch his own TV. If I _____________________ I'll get maids for him. And if he should lose his hair, I'll get toupees for him And when I drop dead When my will is read All will go to the dog that I love." And a bonus to complete your "Pro Monsters" "These new monsters ain't true monsters They've got nothing to show. If you want to make a girl feel petrified, To make her scream, and her eyes grow wide, Tell her that next week she'll be the Wolfman's bride, Why-ho, Monsters, let's go! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,LHC Date: 01 Nov 10 - 02:23 PM For Beckaroonie-- "Whenever I'm in sight It's so upsetting: Every time you bite It's me you're getting. Now you're full of fight, My watchdog in the night." |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,LHC Date: 01 Nov 10 - 02:28 PM For BOB--the Notre Dame fight song: "Cheer, cheer the black and the blue! You're gonna win 'cause we are for you! Push their faces in the mud! Punch out their teeth and draw their blood! Stomp on their stomachs, break all their bones! We wanna hear their screams and their moans! If you follow our advice, You'll win a clean victory." |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST Date: 03 Nov 10 - 05:37 PM You're a fat of bag You're an unsightly hag But, you're still my true love Emmy Lou You're the image of the flag I love, Your complextion is red, white and blue Overweight and big in your ill fitting wig But, should old aquantence be forgot I'll escape from that fat old hag! (Sung to you're a grand old flag) |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST Date: 10 Nov 10 - 07:00 PM I seem to remember a part of "Nothing but a Square" All my ties say kiss me honey I bought them with good money While seeing the world's fair With the pure understanding LALALALALALALA???? That I'm nothing but a square. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,Seonaid Date: 10 Nov 10 - 07:50 PM Nice trip down Memory Lane -- How I loved the Mad "Comic Opera" and other spoofs back in the 60s! My mother was a teacher of English Literature then. Her stock with the students went up 200% one day. She arrived in class with Mad magazines and read several parodies -- spoofs of Longfellow, Whitman, even Chaucer! -- and proceeded to discuss why they were so funny. (The assigned homework that night was an original parody.) I'm still writing parodies, possibly inspired by Mad's examples. Great fun! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST Date: 11 Nov 10 - 03:52 PM I remeber one performed at my college in the early 1970's about the NY Jets: When you're a Jet, you're a Jet all the way From your first day at camp 'til they trade you away. Can't remember the rest |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: BrooklynJay Date: 11 Nov 10 - 05:05 PM Boy, this thread brings back a lot of memories! Somewhere in one of my closets I have a big box of Mad magazines I haven't looked at in nearly forty years... Those parodies really do stick in your mind! And, as I remember, most of the classic ones were written by the great Frank Jacobs. Here's one, to the tune of "My Bonny Lies Over the Ocean": My body has Calamine Lotion My body's as sore as can be The flowers I picked for my granny Turned out to be poison ivy! Don't touch, Don't touch, Don't touch poison ivy, ivy! It will Itch bad And, it's worse than acne! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST Date: 13 Nov 10 - 06:30 PM Carolynn: Here's one from way back in the 60's; Sung to The Jets' Song. When you use Crest You are fighting decay From your first baby tooth To that last gold inlay When you use Crest In your home dental plan All your teeth stay in shape Cause it's got flurostan It passed ev'ry test In Maine and Indiana It outcleaned the rest In Georgia and Montana IT BEAT IPANA! We all tried Crest While the others did not Now we've got 20% less Tooth decay than they've got When you use Crest, you use the Beeeeeeeest! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,Carolynn Date: 13 Nov 10 - 06:35 PM Another from the 60s, from the same set of songs as the Crest song I ache again I shake again My head feels like it's sure to Break again Distressed, dismal and dispondant Am I No glee again In me again My head feels just like World War 3 again Distressed, dismal and despondent Am I Tho my skull's Fairly oozing Still this pain Cannot last; There's one thing That I'm using, And it works FAST, FAST, FAST! I cheer again It's clear again That Anacin saved My career again Distressed dismal and dispondent No more! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: BrooklynJay Date: 14 Nov 10 - 12:59 AM I remember MAD also did another parody of "Bewitched, Bothered and Bewlidered" in the '60s with fairly similar lyrics; but that one was called "Distressed, Dreary and Dyspeptic." Can't remember all the words at the moment... |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,carol Date: 14 Nov 10 - 11:02 AM Does anyone remember the lyrics to the tropical fish song, sung to the tune of "My Favorite Things'? |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies: tropical fish song From: GUEST,carol Date: 14 Nov 10 - 11:32 AM The tropical fish song had lyrics something like this, sung to the tune of 'My Favorite Things', but i don't know most of the words. Can anyone help?... Bright colored (guppies?) and (black shiny mollies?)... (something something) that swim with a splish, These are just some of my tropical fish. Then I bought (mantas?) that sting in the water Deadly (?) that itch for a slaughter (?) that bite with a Squish! Now I have many less tropical fish If you think that Fish are peaceful That's an empty wish. Just put them together and leave them alone, and then you will have... Less fish! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,greenyanks Date: 02 Dec 10 - 11:42 PM Here are a few that I remember: To the song "Georgie Girl" Hey there, charge account Going on another shopping spree Lucky thing for me the store can't see My bank account's bare I'm dead broke Hey there charge account Buying lots of fancy clothes for free I've been broke since 63 But what the heck I don't care But see that salesgirl checking my files And wrecking my day She just discovered that I don't pay She's telling me Goodbye charge account Now I have to look like some poor schnook Taking back the clothes I took I don't have a thing to wear I've been stripped bare Of my charge account I will post others................. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,Greenyanks Date: 02 Dec 10 - 11:59 PM Here's one from East Coast Story: There are three verses in which three politicians are trying to get sit-in demonstrators to move. I know the last two politicians are Ronald Reagan as then Governor of California and President Nixon. The tune is "Officer Krupke" and here is the Reagan verse: Dear kindly Ronald Reagan Forgive us if we're frank We saw you on the late show Like man, you really stank You lost one for the gipper You bombed in Brother Rat Sacra-mento Now look where you're at' Dear Governor Reagan We just gotta say Perhaps your worst performance Is your one here today We'd like to oblige you But one thing is clear You've laid an egg So we'll stay here We'll stay here We'll stay here We'll stay here, here, here We're sincere When we say we'll stay here!! I just remembered the third "politican" - it was J. Edgar Hoover and remember the second part of the verse: Dear J. Edgar Hoover We won't go to jail We've got a real smart lawyer who will free us on bail Before we're convicted And tossed in a cell We'll heist a plane And join Fidel! Join Fidel, join Fidel, we will join Fidel What the hell We'll split and join Fidel!! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: Muttley Date: 03 Dec 10 - 07:46 AM 2 that I recall To the tune of "Halls of Montezuma" (The U.S. Marine Corps Hymn) It was a series of parody songs about that year's Presidential Race From the vaults of Chase Manhattan Bank To his zillion shares of stocks we will vote for Rockefeller Boys 'Cause he's richer than Fort Knox True he'll make a lousy candidate But we never can forget He's the only one that's got the bucks (or was it cash) To pay off the U.S, Debt To the tune of "Anchors Aweigh" - parody songs about games and sports Bishops away my lads, Bishops away Move up your Knights and Pawns and Keep your Queen in play-ay-ay-ay Caslte your King my lad Don't hesitate Oops, I guess I told you wrong He's got you there, he's got you there: Checkmate |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST Date: 06 Dec 10 - 09:02 PM watchdog in the night - a stupid beagle you were watchdog in the night and later on when i returned to my poor home how your jaws did foam you became a snapping dog a crazy fearless yapping dog THERE IS MORE TO THIS THAT I DON'T REMEMBER!! :) |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,punsterdo Date: 09 Dec 10 - 11:54 AM Good King Wenceslas looked out on the something season saw five million lacking food asked what was the reason Do not worry, he was told if there's some starvation It's our way of keeping down overpopula-a-tion! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,Capn Kodak Date: 11 Dec 10 - 03:39 PM There is a stanza in it that ends... Quoth the spaniel, "Buy a Ford" It seems that he had done something... "without a word" then the "buy a Ford" line followed. Haven't read it in over 40 years. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,iiaammii Date: 18 Dec 10 - 10:20 PM As your ship goes through the Galaxy To distant worlds, way past mars Be sure, that your adventures do... not kill off your stars! And you can do it with a crew that's dispensible A crew that's dispensible...le Dispensible Dis pen si ble Minor actors that we bringon Perish when they meet a Klingon One time actors not seen later Vanish in a planet's crater Those of us who try to aid them fail because the script has made them Dispensible le le Dis pen si ble! I have remembered that for 35 years! As well as: (Sound of Silence) I'm a doctor out in space and like I really groove this place because of all the rare diseases not like you silly coughs and sneezes |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,guest Date: 19 Dec 10 - 11:04 PM "Sic transit gloria mundi." Gloria got sick on the bus Monday. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: clueless don Date: 20 Dec 10 - 08:20 AM GUEST,iiaammii, In your 18 Dec 10 - 10:20 PM message, with the Star Trek parody, to what tune was the song to be sung? I'm open to cries of "How can you not know that???", but I genuinely don't know. Don |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,Scot Date: 24 Jan 11 - 03:25 AM The "My Fair Ad-Man" spoof had a version of "With a Little Bit o' Luck": You've never had a clean shave or a haircut A bigger bum I hope I never see Your taste is sad in choosing what you wear, but With a little bit of soap, With a little bit of soap, You'll be looking just like him and me. (CHORUS) With a little bit, with a little bit, With a little bit of soap you’ll look like we. You've got real charcoal staining your grey flannel I thought those shoes were for a tennis game If you were on TV, I'd change the channel, but With a little bit of soap, With a little bit of soap, You and Cary Grant will look the same. (CHORUS) With a little bit, with a little bit, With a little bit of soap you'll look the same With a little bit, with a little bit, With a little bit of Lifebuoy soap! A piece on "Up-to-Date Service Songs" had this take on "Anchors Aweigh": Our taste's absurd, my boys Our taste's absurd With girls, our eyesight's blurred We date pigs by the herd-herd-herd-herd When on that briny deep From June 'til May Practic'ly any creep Looks like the girl who married JFK! The entire "Chinese Restaurant Song" went thus: There's a bright golden glaze on the eggroll There's a bright golden glaze on the eggroll The hot egg foo yung really tickles the tongue The tea's in the pot and the waiter's named Chung Oh, what a glorious dinner Oh, what great Moo Goo Gai Pan We're having twenty-eight courses Thanks to the family plan. All the noodles are covered with soy sauce, All the noodles are covered with soy sauce. We're feeling no pain 'Cause our plates all contain A big heaping portion of Sub Gum Chow Mein. Oh, what a glorious dinner We'll fill our bellies and then One hour after we've eaten We'll all be hungry again, We'll all be hungry again. They also did a Wine Lovers' Song to the tune of "Hello Young Lovers." Does anyone have the words to it? |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,sapphire Date: 12 Feb 11 - 05:28 PM anyone know the lyrics to the michael jackson parody of twitter? new issue. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: Taconicus Date: 13 Feb 11 - 11:06 AM Michael Jackson's new parody? What, is he writing from beyond the grave? |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,Michael Date: 20 Mar 11 - 11:44 AM A MAD parody I memorised (50 yrs back): I remember, I remember The house where I was born, The little bathroom down the passage Where 19 fought each dawn; My 13 brother hated me My sisters thought the same Ma never called me in to eat - She didn't know my name. I remember, I remember The joys my schooling gave; How I was late for infant class Because I had to shave. I think that I shall ne'er forget A little girl named Sue; I carried home her books from school: Her boyfriend told me to. Does anyone remember MAD's parody of Hiawatha making mittens???? |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,Racking My Brain... Date: 23 Mar 11 - 04:53 PM ...for the rest of the lyrics to this: "We've got tommy guns that fire Thirty bullets at a clip We've got automatic rifles and A shotgun that's a pip...." I forget the rest... It was called "There is Nothing Like a Frame" (Nothing in the world There is nothing you can name That is anything like a frame.) |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: JennyO Date: 24 Mar 11 - 03:58 PM Someone quoted part of "I wandered lonely as a clod" further up. Here's the whole of it - I think. I Wandered Lonely as a Clod I wandered lonely as a clod, Just picking up old rags and bottles, When onward on my way I plod, I saw a host of axolotls; Beside the lake, beneath the trees, A sight to make a man's blood freeze. Some had handles, some were plain; They came in blue, red, pink, and green. A few were orange in the main; The damndest sight I've ever seen. The females gave a sprightly glance; The male ones all wore knee-length pants. Now oft, when on the couch I lie, The doctor asks me what I see. They flash upon my inward eye And make me laugh in fiendish glee. I find my solace then in bottles, And I forget them axolotls. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,mad man Date: 27 Apr 11 - 01:30 PM "Onward Pivnick" One of my favorites (from memory, some 50 years later; correctons welcome). This gentle fight song captures the essence of football and the heart's desire of every true fan. To the tune of "On Wisconsin!" Onward Pivnick, onward Pivnick, Forward to the fray! Suffocate them, decimate them, Grind them into clay!(Rah, rah, rah!) Send a roar up, Roll the score up, Grind them into mud! We'll clean the field up With their own blood! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: clueless don Date: 27 Apr 11 - 02:21 PM GUEST,mad man, your quote of "Onward Pivnick" reminded me of another Mad song parody. It started out something like Pray, Pray for Old Pivnick Tech! We're going to get it right in the neck! Send(?) a ??? of taps on high ... That's all I remember just now. Don |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: Dave the Gnome Date: 27 Apr 11 - 04:42 PM Refresh |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine Political parodies: Rockerfeller From: GUEST,joey mac Date: 04 May 11 - 10:13 PM Don't some agree that the Rockerfeller Parody would suit a Donald Trump Campaign?. Sung to the tune of Marine Song: "From the shores of Montezuma" From the vaults of Chase Manhatten Bank to his lavish apartment blocks, You will vote for Donald Trump my friends because he's richer than fort Knox, Although he'll make a garish candidate, We never should forget, He's the only one who's got the brains to pay off the US debt. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST Date: 13 Jun 11 - 04:44 PM Lyrics are as follows: Orange colored mollies and black colored guppies Shy little angels as gentle as puppies Swimming and diving with scarcely a swish These are a few of my tropical fish Then I bought Mantas that sting in the water Deadly piranhas that itch for a slaughter Savage male betas that bite with a squish Now I have many less tropical fish. If you think that Fish are peaceful That's an empty wish Just dump them together and leave them alone And soon you will have... No fish. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST Date: 18 Jun 11 - 04:58 PM There's a bright golden cyst on his elbow. There's a bright golden cyst on his elbow. His throat is as weak as an old dried-up creek and I think that his kneecap is starting to leak. and I recall this part after that (it is almost 55 years): Oh what a beautiful scalpel Oh what a beautiful knife I've got a beautiful feeling I can save his poor life |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,Guest Date: 28 Jun 11 - 08:02 PM OK, here's one you won't understand unless you are old enough to remember when they actually had real food served on airplanes. Sung to the tune of "Tonight" In Flight, In Flight... They Serve Great Meals In Flight... The Sirloins Are So Tasty And Rare. In Flight, In Flight... I Try To Eat In Flight... But Somehow...I Just Can't...In The Air! In Flight, The Headwinds We Are Bucking... And Oh, I Am Up-Chucking... Oh, What A Sorry Sight. I'm White...With Fright... From Trying To Keep Down Every Bite... In Flight! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,jeanne Date: 29 Jun 11 - 11:56 AM Okay, this is bizarre. Bob and I were just re-reading a Mad mag this morning on his favorite Star Wars topic, and now I see this thread. No song parodies in that issue, but several of the parodies already mentioned in this thread came from a single issue that had songs about food: Ground Round (Downtown), the Chinese Restaurant Song (Oh, What a Beautiful Morning), Chopped Liver (Moon River), and Hello, Wine Lovers (Hello, Young Lovers), the last of which I didn't memorize because I was fuzzy on the tune. It also had The Sundae With the Nuts on the Top (The Surry etc.) and probably a couple of others. Ev'ry day is really a fun day When I eat a big, gooey sundae When I eat a big, gooey sundae With the nuts on top (2nd verse, I forgot) (bridge, I can only remember the last line:) Which may be why I'm feeling icky Tho' my figure's taking a beating From this glob of glue that I'm eating When I'm through, you'll find me repeating 'Cause I just can't stop Eating all those gooey sundaes With the nuts on the top There's also another version of The Raven, called The Rating, and I only remember the final punch line: Quoth the Rating, Gary Moore. Surely the entire Mad run is archived somewhere! More, more. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST Date: 05 Aug 11 - 08:32 PM It's that grand old smog It's that low lying smog You can tell by the smell and the pall Tho it burns the skies and stings the eyes It means there's employment for all For it comes you see from some great fac-to-ry Where there's never an idle cog... So let's all be grateful for what we've got And give thanks to that grand old smog |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: katlaughing Date: 05 Aug 11 - 11:35 PM Don't know if this was psoted, previously, but there's some neat history of MAD on their officiel site HERE. There are supposed to be archives, but I couldn't find any of the old, good stuff. There are a few cover scans at MADCOVERSITE.COM. When we finally dig out our storage shed, I'll probably scan the covers of the ones we have, ranging from the 60s through the 80s. May find some parodies, too. They are mostly beat up as I read them, then each of my kids read them as they were passed down. My kids all have great senses of humour, I might add.:-) |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,Tkredge Date: 27 Aug 11 - 07:41 PM I am trying to find the Mad Hiawatha " by the shores of gitchee-goomee by the stagnant green scum water, stood the campus of Nakomis rotten football school Nakomis....? |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,jump Date: 30 Aug 11 - 10:00 AM For it's high high hee We've got vulnerability Shout out "3 no-trump" loud and strong Down Four! Oh we will set the pace As we trump our partner's ace As the bridge team goes rolling along |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: Mrrzy Date: 30 Aug 11 - 05:25 PM I seem to recall something about Mighty Casey Had Struck out... |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,sixtieschick Date: 30 Aug 11 - 08:24 PM Another one of the free 45 RPM records that parodied rock 'n' roll songs, along with "She Got a Nose Job," was "Please Betty Jane Shave Your Legs." But I don't remember a word except for that title and chorus. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: Fl!p Breskin Date: 30 Aug 11 - 09:57 PM I didn't see one of my favorites! To the tune of Sidewalks Of New York: North Side, South Side, all around the square The factories are polluting every cubic inch of air Cars & trucks together spew exhaust up and down We'll have to play in gas masks on the sidewalks of our town! |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,DavLaurel Date: 10 Oct 11 - 01:20 AM When the Bomb comes falling down, falling down, falling down When the Bomb comes falling down, There'll be fallout. Cover up your face and head, face and head, face and head Then get on your suit of lead, Cause there's fallout. Do not stop to talk or play, talk or play, talk or play Find your shelter right away, Cause there's fallout. Just admit your nearest kin, nearest kin, nearest kin Shoot down neighbors who want in, Cause there's fallout. Come out when they sound all clear, sound all clear, sound all clear Don't drink milk till late next year...Cause there's fallout. I committed to memory a lot of these...more later. |
Subject: RE: Mad Magazine parodies From: GUEST,DavLaurel Date: 10 Oct 11 - 03:25 AM BrooklynJay, I recall a different ending... Don't touch, Don't touch, You'll get a rash from ivy, ivy! It will Itch bad And it will look worse than acne! |
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