Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Peace Date: 15 Oct 06 - 07:20 PM One day the big animals and the little animals decided to have a football game. As the first half went along, the big animals were scoring at will. Every time they got the ball they would run it in for a touchdown. Then came the second half... First play: The elephant runs the ball up the middle. WAP!! Tackled for a five-yard loss. The little animals go back to the huddle cheering and congratulating each other. "Who made that tackle?" asked the ant. "I did," said the centipede. Second play: The rhinoceros runs the ball up the middle. WHOMP!! Tackled for another five-yard loss. Back in the huddle the flea asked, "Who made that great stop?" "I did," said the centipede. Third play: The gorilla tries an end sweep, led by the hippo throwing the lead blocks. SMACK!! Centipede tackles him for a 10-yard loss. Back in the huddle, the gnat asked the centipede, "Where were you in the first half?" The centipede replied, "Puttin' on my shoes!" |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,surf's up Date: 15 Oct 06 - 07:28 PM I realised I was dyslexic when I went to a toga party dressed as a goat. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST Date: 15 Oct 06 - 07:32 PM dyslexia rules KO |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,surf's up Date: 15 Oct 06 - 07:36 PM A piece of rope walks into a bar and the bartender says, "we don't serve your kind." The rope goes outside, ties himself in a knot and frays one end of himself. He walks back into the bar and the bartender says, "Weren't you just in here?" The rope replies, "No, I'm a frayed knot." |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST Date: 15 Oct 06 - 07:41 PM A white horse walks into a bar. The barman says to the horse, we have a drink named after you. The horse says, "What, Eric?". |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: bobad Date: 15 Oct 06 - 07:48 PM An amnesiac comes into a bar. He asks, "Do I come here often?" |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,surf's up Date: 15 Oct 06 - 07:49 PM A penguin walks into a bar. He says to the barman, " Have you seen my brother?" " I don't know" says the barman, " what does he look like?" |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Peace Date: 15 Oct 06 - 08:39 PM This 395 pound gorilla wearing blue tights and red high heels walks into a bar and says, "Has anyone seen my friend Beatrix?" (Does snyone know the rest of it?) |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: number 6 Date: 15 Oct 06 - 09:30 PM Sneffer heard this joke Peace ... sorry. sIx |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Rapparee Date: 15 Oct 06 - 10:02 PM The bride, cuddled in the arms of her new golfer husband, said, "Honey, I have to admit something. I...I'm a hooker." "Oh, that's okay," replied the groom. "Just keep you left arm straight...." |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Rapparee Date: 15 Oct 06 - 11:30 PM Guy walked into a bar, fell to his knees, clapped his hands to bleeding forehead and said, "God DAMN son of bitch! Who's the sorry bastard who put that there?" |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Azizi Date: 16 Oct 06 - 09:20 AM Here's some "Yo Mama" lines that children, teens, and adults sent into my website on handclap rhymes, taunting rhymes, cheerleader cheers etc: Yo Mama's so fat when she wore a yellow rain coat, people called out "TAXI!!" to her. Yo mama is so fat when she entered a fat contest they said no professionals allowed! Yo mama so fat she was baptized at sea world. Your momma so poor that when i went in your house and stepped on a cigarrette she said ohhhhhhhhhh its cold in here who shut off the heat Yo moma's so stupid i put a paper on the tv and asked her what she was watching and she said paperview. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,Autolycos Date: 16 Oct 06 - 06:32 PM Is is possible to go to a party dressed as a toga? Just wondered. Ivor |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Peace Date: 16 Oct 06 - 06:34 PM It's the prepositions what do it. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: John O'L Date: 16 Oct 06 - 06:46 PM Giraffe walks into a bar and says "The highballs are on me" |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: bobad Date: 16 Oct 06 - 07:04 PM Like...what's up with that, eh? |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,surf's up Date: 16 Oct 06 - 07:04 PM A man is taking a walk in Central park in New York. Suddenly he sees a little girl being attacked by a pit bull dog . He runs over and starts fighting with the dog. He succeeds in killing the dog and saving the girl's life. A policeman who was watching the scene walks over and says:"You are a hero, tomorrow you can read it in all the newspapers: "Brave New Yorker saves the life of little girl" The man says: - "But I am not a New Yorker!"Oh ,then it will say in newspapers in the morning: 'Brave American saves life of little girl'" - the policeman answers. "But I am not an American!" says the man. "Oh, what are you then? " The man says: - "I am a Saudi!" The next day the newspapers says: "Islamic extremist kills innocent American dog. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Bill D Date: 16 Oct 06 - 07:22 PM "...you don't think I asked for a 12" pianist, do you?" "...I dunno", says the bartender, "he just sits back there, licking his eyebrows." "...and the Texan hollers, "for God's sake don't flush it!" "...and bartender puts his thumb on the ant and says "sorry about that." "..."well", says Paddy, "The first one always tastes terrible, and the last one always gets me into trouble at home." "...hi, there, Little Fuck!" "...oh, we've settled that...we're just haggling over the price." "...and the rhinocerous says, "At these prices, I'm not surprised." "...why no, I'm a frayed knot!" "...it must've been that bar bitch you ate." "...snnnffff...no, no! Too near ze ass!" |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Bill D Date: 16 Oct 06 - 07:23 PM oh, I'm sorry...should those have been all different posts? ....85 billion is a long way to go.... |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: RangerSteve Date: 16 Oct 06 - 07:44 PM Now that I'm retired, I thought I'd finally read this thread. I didn't read it all, just the first 20 and last 20 posts. I have nothing to contribute to this thread, except get it one more post closer to the goal. I probably won't be back, as I live too far out in the country to get DSL, and dial-up is too slow and it takes about 5 minutes for the whole thread to appear on my screen. So don't bother commenting on what I wrote here, unless you want to talk about me behind my back, because I'll never see it. Unless I get really bored. Steve |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: bobad Date: 16 Oct 06 - 09:47 PM "85 billion is a long way to go...." A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Peace Date: 16 Oct 06 - 09:52 PM Oh, shiiiiiiiiit. That means this journey of 85 billion miles has to start with 85 million steps? Where's the wankers? They could help with this. I think folks just ain't takin' this seriously enough. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: ragdall Date: 16 Oct 06 - 11:00 PM Can this server server upload 85 billion posts in a single thread? If it can, will we live long enough to see it finish doing it? |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: number 6 Date: 16 Oct 06 - 11:10 PM I think the topic of this thread is slightly exagerrated. That's my unbiased opinion. sIx |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: number 6 Date: 16 Oct 06 - 11:15 PM Jaysus H. !! I meant 'exaggerated' I wish the hell this forum had a "spell checker" sIx |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: John O'L Date: 16 Oct 06 - 11:28 PM So what do we all really think of RangerSteve? It's OK, he won't read it. (Heh heh) His stupid connection's too slow. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,Blind DRunk in Blind River Date: 17 Oct 06 - 01:04 AM This is Shane, eh? I figgered it was time to, like, drop in and say how im-flippin-PRESSED I am by the amazin' flippin' response to my 85 Billions thread here, eh? Totally decent! I never thoght it would go this far but it did. Out-flippin'-RAGious! Way to go, eh? WE are closin' in on 500 which is about how many girls I would like to have by the end of this year, eh? Majorly cool. This trhead ROCks! - Shane |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: ragdall Date: 17 Oct 06 - 01:27 AM Happy Birthday on a touch-tone phone -- please stop me if you've heard this before? > > > > > > > *note: Commas are pauses, and hyphens are held notes. 112, 163, 112, 196, 110, 8521, 008, 121 |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: ragdall Date: 17 Oct 06 - 01:46 AM Theorem: 1$ = 1c. Proof: |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Rapparee Date: 17 Oct 06 - 08:34 AM Ragdall, please send me you physical address and correct name. I played "Happy Birthday" on my phone as per your instructions. You own me US $45,693.12 for the call to Ulan Bator, relayed via the Mars rover "Opportunity." |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Rapparee Date: 17 Oct 06 - 08:37 AM Oh, yes. Did you know that a urinalysis done very recently in the laboratory at Blind River Hospial demonstrates conclusively that Shane dilutes his beer, half beer and half grape soda pop? |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,KB Date: 17 Oct 06 - 02:12 PM Did you hear about the doctor who wouldn't accept payment for circumcisions? He only took tips. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,KB Date: 17 Oct 06 - 02:31 PM Have to post here or I will be a liar. Don't ask. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Georgiansilver Date: 17 Oct 06 - 02:48 PM NO....NO....NO...NO...NO...NO..... |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: RangerSteve Date: 17 Oct 06 - 03:56 PM Well, Peace explained to me how to get to the last message in a very long thread, so I'm back to add another post. I have nothing worthwhile to say here, so you can ignore this. Steve |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,I was there at the beginning man Date: 17 Oct 06 - 04:19 PM Welcome to the thread RangerSteve. I remember my first visit here many years ago now (summers lasted for ever then). I never intended to return a second time, much like you (and many hoped I wouldn't). Steve, you say you have nothing to say, but I have found your posts some of the most refreshing we've had for ages. And should you want to become a member of the 'First 100' club, you'll be pleased to know that we have one or two positions left, even though we are approaching 500 posts. (You'll have to follow the formal procedures though - see earlier posts for details) Anyway, welcome again to the 85 Billion thread. You'll never leave! |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST Date: 17 Oct 06 - 05:33 PM I'm here because peace is going to make us all millionaires. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: bobad Date: 17 Oct 06 - 05:36 PM I hear he's got a good deal on a bridge, hardly used. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Rapparee Date: 17 Oct 06 - 05:38 PM I'm here because Peace threatened to hurt me if I didn't show up. Well, technically, HE didn't threaten to hurt me. He threatened to have a couple of Really Big Guys threaten to hurt me. Since I'm very allergic to pain, here I am. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,KB Date: 17 Oct 06 - 05:48 PM It doesn't matter how you get here. All are welcome at the 85 Billion thread. Can't you just feel the love in the air? |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Emma B Date: 17 Oct 06 - 05:55 PM I feel it now what? |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Bill D Date: 17 Oct 06 - 06:04 PM now what? You wait and see if it feels you back!.. (I am here because I am a glutton for nonsense) |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST Date: 17 Oct 06 - 06:29 PM I am still here because peace hasn't made me a millionaire yet. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Peace Date: 17 Oct 06 - 06:30 PM OK. Because I can see that there will be 25 more posts here before midnight, here is the idea. You have to mull this one over for a few minutes before you can actually envision the money-making potential of stock options and franchise opportunities, but when it finally sinks in, WOW. So, here goes. Anchovy Milkshakes. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,what, what, what ? Date: 17 Oct 06 - 06:33 PM I hear a strange echo too |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,what, what, what ? Date: 17 Oct 06 - 06:36 PM May I have a pizza the action ? |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: bobad Date: 17 Oct 06 - 06:39 PM Garlic would make them quite palatable. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Peace Date: 17 Oct 06 - 06:40 PM GUEST www. Truthfully, we are trying to discourage those who have an impulsive urge to buy in with two posts. I mean, get real. This is going to be bigger than Microsoft. |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: GUEST,what, what, what ? Date: 17 Oct 06 - 06:40 PM Hmmmmmmmmm I'm stirred now but not quite shaken |
Subject: RE: BS: Will this thread reach 85 billion posts? From: Peace Date: 17 Oct 06 - 06:41 PM See? There's a guy who has vision. |