Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,och aye the noo
Date: 11 Feb 24 - 06:22 PM

Not last night but the night before
three wee monkeys came to my door
one had a fiddle, one had a drum
and one had a pancake stuck to his bum

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 09 Feb 24 - 11:44 PM

Not last night but the night before, 24 robber came knocking at my door. Went upstairs to get my gun, tripped over the piss pot on the run. Couldn’t swim, couldn’t float, god damn bugger went down my throat. Went downstairs to get a drink, tripped over the oven and burned my dink. Went out side to cool it off, some damn bugger pulled it off.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Arthur
Date: 10 May 23 - 12:15 AM

In SE Wisconsin we sang,

"Not last night but the night before, 24 niggers came knocking at my door.
Went upstairs to get a gun, god damn niggers beat me on the run
Went downstairs to get a drink, skuzzed my dick on the kitchen sink.
Went outside to cool it off,
One of those niggers bit it off"

I never understood what "skuzzed" meant, But then, as kids we were never really interpreting these words. We had no ill will towards black people. In fact, we would sing the same rhyme if a black could join us for the game, and we would just all laugh about it.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: Lighter
Date: 25 Aug 22 - 10:40 AM

Recited by a fellow grad student fom North Carolina in 1974:

Not last night but the night before,
Twenty-four robbers came knockin' at my door.
Went upstairs to get my gun,
Fell in the pisspot on the run.

He made it sound like a real experience.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Aug 22 - 04:55 PM

From elementary school, mid 60's S.A.Texas. Girls would jump rope and chant:

Not last night but the night before,
24 robbers were knocking at my door.

I asked them what they wanted
and this is what they said...

Spanish dancers, do the splits,
Spanish dancers, do it like this.....


That's all I remember.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: Bonnie Shaljean
Date: 17 Feb 22 - 05:24 PM

I remember this from the school playground, as a jump-rope rhyme. Did anybody else sing a bit that went:

One for the doctor
One for the nurse
One for the lady with the alligator purse

And if so, what were the verses that led up to it? I'm racking my brain cell, with no noticeable results.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 17 Feb 22 - 03:32 PM

Not tonight but the night before
27 niggers came knocking at my door
went up stairs to get my gun
fell in the toilet on the run
went downstairs to get a drink
racked my balls on the kitchen sink
went outside to cool them off
a great big nigger bit them off

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 10 Dec 21 - 02:02 AM

Not last night, but the night before,
Two tom cats came knocking on my door,
I went down stairs to let them in,
Hit me on with a rolling pin,
Now the rolling pin was made of glass,
Picked me up and smacked my,
Ask no questions tell no lies,
ever seen a donkey doing up his fly’s,
Fly’s are e newsents bugs are worst,
This is the end of my chinease verse.
Ching cong china man baught a penny doll,
Washed it dressed it then it caught a cold,
Called the docter,
The docter could’nt come,
All because of a speckle on my BUM BUM BUM.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,BozMonsterCookie
Date: 28 Jul 21 - 12:43 AM

Not last night but the night before,
24 robbers came knocking at my door.
I rushed downstairs but they got in ...
they hit me over the head with a rolling pin.

Later when I woke still feeling groggy,
Everything was gone, even my little doggy.
Had to lie down so I found my bed,
tripped on the piss pot, it landed on my head.

That turd wouldn't sink, didn't even float,
instead that bloody turd went down my throat.

I stumbled to the bathroom to get some toilet paper,
trailing puke and its hot-sick vapour.
Started feeling better got up a little later
slipped and burned my balls, on the radiator.

Stuck em' out the window to cool them off,
down came the window and chopped them off.
So I went outside to pick them up,
along came my doggy and ate them ... ruff!

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 24 Dec 20 - 08:03 AM

Not last night, but the night before,
Three tom cats came knocking at my door.
One had a trumpet.
One had a drum.
One had a pancake stuck to his bum.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Some dude I guess
Date: 02 Sep 20 - 04:26 PM

Gotta say I'm a bit embarrassed about this one. Grew up in a hick town and learned the racial version before I really understood why it was more than just "more bad words". Anyway, for posterity:

Not last night, but the night before
400 niggers came a'knocking at my door
Went upstairs to get my gun
Tripped over the piss-pot, on the run
I couldn't swim, I couldn't float
A big old' turd went down my throat
Went downstairs to fix a martini
Tripped over the stove and I burnt my weenie
Went outside to cool it off
And one of those niggers bit it off

(sounds like a pretty shit evening)

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: Stilly River Sage
Date: 01 Sep 20 - 11:45 AM

We used to sing the innocent versions of this on the playground. But that last one would get a child sent home for inappropriate language, as would a number of the others I remember learning back in the late 50s, early 60s.

This one offers a segue over to the topic about Are racist, but traditional, songs OK?.

Subject: Re: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Peanut Queen
Date: 01 Sep 20 - 08:10 AM

Last night and the night before, an onion and a pickle came knocking on my door.
I got up to let them in, they hit me in the head with a bowling pin
One went east, one went west, one went up your mama's dress.
Now your mama's gonna have a baby, a little chocolate baby.
If it's a boy give it a toy, if it's a girl give it a curl.
Wrap it up in toilet paper, send it up the elevator.
First floor stop, Second floor stop, Third floor you better not stop 'cuz h-o-p spells HOP.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Johnnycake
Date: 11 Oct 19 - 06:50 PM

Went upstairs to jump into bed
Fell in the piss pot on my head
I couldn’t swim and I couldn’t float
A great big turd went down my throat
Went to the window and broke the glass
Down came the devil sliding on his ass
The devil shit a monkey
The monkey shit a flea
The flea shit a sailor sailing on the sea
The sea began to roar
And the pee began to pour
And the sailor had the shits
And he couldn’t get to shore

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,dixie
Date: 31 Aug 19 - 12:39 AM

not last night but the night before two young men came knocking on my door back to back they faced each other pulled there sords and shot each other

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Brady Deucher
Date: 02 Nov 18 - 09:04 AM

Not last night but the night before
24 robbers came knocking at my door
I went upstairs to get a gun
Tripped on the pot on the run
I went downstairs to get a drink
Tripped on the stove and burned my dink
I went outside to cool it off
A gosh dang bulldog bit it off.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 25 Oct 18 - 08:08 PM

Version from Edmonton Canada in the early 1970’s:

Wasn’t the night but the night before,
16 robbers came to my door,
Opened the door to let them in,
Got hit over the head with a rolling pin.
Went upstairs to get my gun,
Tripped over the piss pot on my run.
Went downstairs to get a drink,
Tripped over the stove and burnt my d*nk.
Went outside to cool it off,
Some damn robber shot it off.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Oct 18 - 04:06 AM

Not last night but the night before 24 niggers came knocking on my door went up stairs to get my gun fell in a piss pot on the run I couldnt swim I couldn't float 2 damn turds went down my throat I went inside stood by the heater the damn heater burnt my Peter i went outside to cool it off 2 damn bulldogs bit it off.... idk if that's how it goes I can't remember all the words

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Canada, 80's
Date: 08 Feb 18 - 03:52 AM

Not last night but the night before
99 niggers came knocking at my door
I wet upstairs to get my gun
Slipped on the piss pot on the run
Couldn't swim, couldn't float
A piece of shit went down my throat
I went downstairs to get a drink
Tripped on the stove and burnt my dink
Went outside to cool off
But a God damn nigger shot it off
Went around the corner to pick it up
But a God damn nigger sucked it up

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,DTM
Date: 17 Jul 16 - 06:12 AM

Re: Guest (2 posts up)

A clout (pronounced 'cloot') in my neck of the woods is a cloth used for washing dishes or wiping surfaces.

It can also mean 'a thump' (pronouced 'clowt'). e.g. "I'll give you a clout if you say that again" or "The door wouldn't shut so I gave it a clout"

I have also heard it used for clothing as quoted above, "Ne'er cast a cloot 'til May be oot".

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,DTM
Date: 17 Jul 16 - 06:01 AM

The version I remember as a kid was similar to ones above.

"No' last night but the night before
Three wee monkeys came to the door
Yin had whisky, yin had rum
And yin had a hot poker sticking up its bum"

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 17 Jul 16 - 03:02 AM

Bev Hills. London in the 60s our version had the nig*** word. Also from higher up the thread a Clout was a coat. As in "nae cast a clout till May is out"

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Van
Date: 06 Jun 16 - 12:27 PM

When I was a kid in Georgia (about 1960), it was "rolling pin" when there were adults around, otherwise it was "bottle of gin".

Not last night but the night before,
Twenty-four robbers came knocking at my door
As I ran out, they ran in,
Hit them on the head with a bottle of gin
One, Two, ... Twenty-four
(If you made it to 24)
Spanish dancer, do the splits
Spanish dancer, do the twist
Spanish dancer, turn around
Spanish dancer, get out of town

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,creeksj
Date: 05 Apr 16 - 11:49 PM

Not last night, but the night before
Two tom cats came a knocking on my door.
I went down to let them in,
They knocked me down with a rolling pin
The rolling pin was made of brass
They picked me up and smacked my ass.
Flies are a problem bees are best
Have you ever seen a policeman is a short woolly vest.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,geoff brear
Date: 14 Oct 15 - 12:57 PM

I seem to remember this version from my youth in the fifties.
Not last night but the night before two dead men came knocking on the door,
Back to back they faced each other,
Drew thier swords and shot each other.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: Uncle_DaveO
Date: 04 Sep 14 - 12:42 PM

Azizi, "bul bul" is probably "bulbul", which is indeed something
nice, as you hoped.

According to Wikipedia,

Bulbuls are a family, Pycnonotidae, of medium-sized passerine songbirds. Many forest species are known as greenbuls, brownbuls, leafloves, or bristlebills. The family is distributed across most of Africa and into the Middle East, tropical Asia to Indonesia, and north as far as Japan. and lots more.

Dave Oesterreich

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 04 Sep 14 - 07:27 AM

Wow! Can't believe there are so many posts - and versions!

Not last night but the night before,
three bad men came knocking at my door.
Went downstairs to let 'em in,
hit me over the head with a rollin' pin,
rollin' pin was made of brass,
fell down backswards and broke my a*se.

Went upstairs to go to bed,
bucket of sh*t fell on my head.
Went downstairs to get a drink,
tripped on the stove and burnt my di*k.
Went outside to cool it off,
and blo*dy b*stards blew it off!

Haha, I haven't recited that in about 40 years!!

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 27 Jul 14 - 04:52 PM

Not last night but the night before, 40 little n-# came a knocking at my door. Went up stairs to get my gun, tripped on the run ????
went downstairs to get a drink, slipped and burnt my dink, went outside to cool it off, one of those n-#s he bit it off

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 11 Feb 14 - 09:44 AM

Last night, the night before, 49 robbers knocked on my door.
I went down stairs to let them in, they hit me on the head with a bowling pin.
It was big, it was brass, so they shoved it up my ass.

I went upstairs to get my gun, hit the pot on the run.
Couldn't swim, couldn't float, got a big turd down my throat.

Went down stairs to get a drink, bumped the stove, burned my dink.
Ran outside to cool it off, a big bull dog bit it off.

So when I die, bury me deep, hang my balls on a cherry tree.
When they're ripe, take a bite, don't blame me if you fart all night.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 19 Dec 13 - 04:12 PM

one fine day in the middle of the night, 2 dead men got up to fight, back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: Rumncoke
Date: 29 Jul 13 - 05:27 PM

That last line 'back to back' was in something my grandfather used to recite

It was a very long time ago now but it wasn't associated with that first line but (possibly) something something middle of the night, two dead men got up to fight.

I wonder if my sister can throw any light on it - I'll ask.

there was also, as a prologue

Little tumti tum esquire
set his britches bum on fire
by sitting on an electricity wire

And afterwards
feather ecor ecor icor, Elizabeth Ellen something something - which he said was someone's name.

and
Dan Dan the dustbin man,
washed his face in a frying pan
combed his hair with a rusty nail

He used to run all these different things together - and end with some lines from what I think was a mumming play for the character little devil doubt.

Naturally as a child I thought he was just being silly.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Will
Date: 29 Jul 13 - 08:47 AM

The one I remember, may be victorian as they made up silly verses.

No last night but the night before two Tom cats came knocking at my door.
Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot one another.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,toronto 1975
Date: 10 Jun 13 - 01:13 PM

not last night but the night before, 24 niggers came knocking at my door, i went downstairs to let them in, they rolled me over with a rolling pin,i went upstairs to get some gin and fell into the toilet up to my chin, i couldn't swim i couldn't float, a piece of shit went down my throat, i went downstairs to the electric fire, caught my dick in the electric wire, went outside to cool it off and a god damn nigger bit it off.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: Q (Frank Staplin)
Date: 01 May 13 - 12:26 PM

Vaguely remembered-

Not last night but the night before
I threw my wife out the bedroom door.

There was more, but it has escaped my leaky brain.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,shell
Date: 01 May 13 - 10:16 AM

Anyone know which horror book has the rhyme "Jack be nimble" in it please.
Premise is a guy finds if he places a lighted candle at a certain part of a wall then says the rhyme and jumps over the candle, he finds himself in another reality but they don't welcome strangers and they look for him with drummers banging their drums. Any help appreciated.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 14 Apr 13 - 03:08 AM

Norther California 1980's went like this:

Not last night but the night before, 28 niggers came knocking at my door. Went up stairs to get a gun, tripped over the toilet, could't swim, couldn't float, big old turd went down my throat. Went down stairs to get a stick, tripped over a radio and burnt my dick. Went out side to cool it off, Steve Wonder bit it off.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Feb 13 - 09:09 AM

im butta butaa wadda wada to gutta gutaa

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Feb 13 - 09:07 AM

Follow me on INSTAGRAM @trojanman_

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 07 Feb 13 - 09:03 AM

'Last night the night before 12 bald hoes came knockin at the door i yelled out "you cant come in" !! dr. mirricle please help them they wuldnt go away i told them i was gay , but she said i gave her bessfrend some dick the other day they wuldnt leave me but since i had to pee i told them if they drunk it you can have my wee wee i went in them they had no walls i put em all out now i got blue balls

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 04 Jan 13 - 02:17 AM

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Jessiiii B
Date: 03 Aug 12 - 04:50 PM

Not last night but the night before, 24 robbers came knocking at the door, I went downstairs to let one in, And one hit me over the head with a bowling pin, The bowling pin was made of glass, I fell and trip and broke my ass, I went upstairs to lay in bed, And a bucket of shit fell on my head, I went downstairs to light the fire, And my dick got caught in the electric wire, I went outside to cool it off, And the bloody bastard shot it off, I went to the doctor and the doctor said, SORRY MATE YOU BALLS ARE DEAD!!

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,bb
Date: 12 Jun 12 - 12:32 PM

My Dad used to sing this to me as a kid. He was from S. London (1940s). His version went

Not last night but the night before
two tom cats came knocking at my door
I went downstairs to let them in and they knocked me over with a rolling pin
the rolling pin was made of glass so I turned them over and smacked their arse
no questions hear no lies, ever seen a monkey doing up his flies
flies are a nuisance bugs are worse
and thats the end of my little verse!

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Big Jim
Date: 09 Apr 12 - 02:03 PM

What a shame! If any of you actually sang any of the racist song/poems you claimed to have sung as children, it's no wonder the world is so screwed up....

Here's a variation of "Last night...." I sang as a child:

Lat night, the night before
and ONION and a PICKLE came a knockin' at my door.
I got up to let 'em in,
they hit me over the head with a rollin' pin.
I went upstairs to git my gun,
you oughta seen that pickle and the onion run!
They jumped so high
they touched the sky, and
they didn't come back
'til the Fourth of July!

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,MickeyWales
Date: 31 Mar 12 - 02:29 PM

Not last night, but the night before
Two tom cats came a knocking on my door.
I went down to let them in,
one knocked me down with a rolling pin
The rolling pin was made of glass
as i fell down i cut my A**E

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,DUTCH
Date: 02 Jan 12 - 08:27 PM

In South Africa we learned this one...

NOT LAST NIGHT BUT THE NIGHT BEFORE
24 NIGGERS CAME KNOCKING AT MY DOOR
WENT OUTSIDE TO SCARE THEM OFF
GOT HIT OVER THE HEAD WITH A BAG OF ROCKS
RAN UPSTAIRS TO GET MY GUN
FELL IN THE TOILET ON THE RUN
COULDN'T SWIM, COULDN'T FLOAT
A PIECE OF SHIT WENT DOWN MY THROAT
FLEW DOWNSTAIRS TO GET A DRINK
TRIPPED ON THE STOVE AND BURNT MY DINK
WENT OUTSIDE TO COOL IT OFF
ONE BLOODY NIGGER CHEWED IT OFF
PICKED UP MY GUN AND AIMED MY BEST
SHOT THAT BLACKIE IN THE CHEST
NIGGERS WENT EAST NIGGERS WENT WEST
SOME EVEN FLEW OVER THE COO COO'S NEST
WENT INSIDE AND CLOSED THE DOOR
THIS IS LIFE OF AN AFRIKAANS BOER
SAUNTERED UPSTAIRS TO HAVE A NAP
THAT WAS MY NIGHT AND THAT WAS THAT


i didnt remember all the words, i had to ask a few friends and this is what we came up with...

bloody hell, how terrible these rhymes have progressed.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 23 Dec 11 - 04:26 PM

Chinese verse

Not last night, but the night before,
two tomcats came knocking at my door;
I went downstairs to let them in,
They hit me on the head with a rolling pin,
The rolling pin was made of brass they picked me up and smacked my ask
No questions tell no lies have you ever seen a policeman doing up his flies
Are a nuisance bugs are worst that's the end of my Chinese verse.

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: Azizi
Date: 13 Sep 11 - 02:12 PM

Sorry, GUEST,Sam A. Robrin. I've never heard or read that civil rights chant before finding it here. I'd also love to know more about it. As I'm sure you're aware, the "Wallace" mentioned in that chant is the then arch segregationist Alabama govern George Wallace.

The phrase "jump back baby jump back" probably was lifted from Rufus Thomas's hit 1964 R&B song "Jump Back". I don't know why I'm suprised, but a video of his performance of that song is on YouTube. Here's that link:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPqcccmiOMc

Hat tip to GUEST,Clive Pownceby who posted information about that song in this threads on 22 Mar 11 - 02:52 AM.

Both Rufus Thomas' "Jump Back" and the civil rights chant that Pete Seeger referenced probably owe the "jump back baby jump back" phrase to the "jump back honey jump back" phrase in Paul Laurence Dunbar's poem "A Negro Love Song" (published in 1895). The words to that poem are located on an number of sites, including my newest blog post http://pancocojams.blogspot.com/2011/09/paul-laurence-dunbars-negro-love-song.html

I reposted your comment GUEST,Sam A. Robrin in that blog post with that hope that there might be some response from those readers. If so, I'll add it here.

Thanks and best wishes,

Azizi Powell

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Sam A. Robrin
Date: 12 Sep 11 - 04:32 AM

I came here to get the rest of a Civil Rights - era crowd song that Pete Seeger references in an issue of BROADSIDE (#57, if you care to look it up):

Last night and the night before,
(Jump back, Wallace, jump back!)
Twenty-five troopers at my door,
(Jump back, Wallace, jump back!)
I got up and let 'em in....

Anyone know more about its use during the Alabama freedom marches?

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST
Date: 08 Jul 11 - 05:22 PM

I remember it used to be this...

Not last night but the night before,
Twenty-four robbers came knocking at my door,
Went downstairs to let them in,
This is what they said to me;
My name is...
Elvis Presley,
Girls are sexy,
Sitting in the background,
Drinking pepsi,
Having a baby,
Naming it Daisy,
Girls go 'Muah muah',
Boys go 'Wooh!'

Subject: RE: Not Last Night But The Night Before-rhyme
From: GUEST,Daphne, a baby boomer.
Date: 28 Jun 11 - 07:55 PM

Great memories here, thanks everyone for your contribution. The version in North West London when I was at school in the 50's was
Not last night but the night before
3 tomcats knocked at my door.
Opened the door to let them in
they hit me on the head with the rolling pin.
I went upstairs to make my bed they threw the potty at my head,